Cannot believe this is happening. Teacher lied about my son.

[mjkacmom]

I'm not sure where your kids go to school but around here touching another student is an automatic suspension, uttering words that can be taken as a threat is a suspension and after a suspension guess what is next an expulsion and it does happen. a kid in my son's kindergarten class got a suspension for pushing someone.(and not violently) The principal said his hands were tied because it was reported he had to suspend the child.

I guess we're still a little old fashioned then. There are daily incidences here, resulting in lunch in the principal's office the next day, same for the next infraction. My gf dd has a boy in her class (2nd grade), who told her she's stupid (on a daily basis), her clothes are ugly, and that he had a gun, and was going to climb into her house when she was sleeping, and kill her. My gf asked me if she should say something to the school (this is her only child). I told her "of course," she did, and I think the parents were called.

Heck, ds7 ended up in the nurse's office last year, because he was very injured, and the kid's parents were never even notified (this made me mad, but not enough to call the school over).

 

[luvsJack]

I guess we're still a little old fashioned then. There are daily incidences here, resulting in lunch in the principal's office the next day, same for the next infraction. My gf dd has a boy in her class (2nd grade), who told her she's stupid (on a daily basis), her clothes are ugly, and that he had a gun, and was going to climb into her house when she was sleeping, and kill her. My gf asked me if she should say something to the school (this is her only child). I told her "of course," she did, and I think the parents were called.

Heck, ds7 ended up in the nurse's office last year, because he was very injured, and the kid's parents were never even notified (this made me mad, but not enough to call the school over).

Thank goodness our school is a happy medium. No suspension for touching (dd punched a boy in the face because he wouldn't leave her alone, the teacher looked at him and said "well, she warned you.") unless the teacher feels its necessary.

BUT I can 100% guarantee you that if a child told my dd that he "was going to climb into her house when she was sleeping, and kill her" there would be a heck of a lot more than a parent being called, he would be removed from the classroom.

I have to ask though, if "very injured" is not enough to call the school over; what is?

 

[mjkacmom]

I have to ask though, if "very injured" is not enough to call the school over; what is?

Well, although the nurse felt the other boy was clearly at fault, after talking to ds and dd, it could've been an accident, and I know that ds7 plays as rough as this other boy. By the time I found out the other parent wasn't notified (2 weeks later the parent called the principal on an unrelated incident, and the principal told her that her ds hurt my ds, and so the parent apologized to me), I couldn't see what good it would do, anyway. Our principal is hanging on, waiting on either a superintenent position, or retirement.

 

[luvsJack]

As for the "hostile enviornment", if the OP's son has been blamed before for things this other kid has done and the para has lied before then it could very well be considered a hostile environment. Especially if the boy's counselor is willing to say that this type of thing is causing some of the problems he is experiencing. For those reasons, it seems like she should be able to get her child moved to another classroom.

 

[PaulaSB12]

We are afraid that if we go nay higher and keep him in the school, they will make it 100 times worse for him. We certainly don't want that.

We really are sick about all of this. There really is no good outcome to it. Either we pull him out of a school that he knows and where his friends are, or we keep him there and hope things get better with them knowing we are on their butts. There is no good choice. And how do you explain to a 6 year old who is already anxious that he is moving to a new school?

It is all so horrible and I hate that we are going through it. But we are, and we need to deal with it in the way that is in the best interest of my son.

If at possible move him. I went to a horrible school just before I was 11 by the time I was 12 all I wanted to do was die. Its really not worth the damage to you child to risk it, then when he is moved go after that principal's job!!!!!!!!!! He needs to be sacked not retired.

 

[kappy]

As for the "hostile enviornment", if the OP's son has been blamed before for things this other kid has done and the para has lied before then it could very well be considered a hostile environment. Especially if the boy's counselor is willing to say that this type of thing is causing some of the problems he is experiencing. For those reasons, it seems like she should be able to get her child moved to another classroom.

This is exactly how I feel. DS is seeing a couselor for anxiety and low self esteem. The self-esteem issues increased 110% since he started school this year BECAUSE of what is going on in class. The therapist is helping him with his anxiety and trying to get him to find his voice because he does not stick up for himself. He is trying to teach my son it is OK to make mistakes and that he is a great kid. But everyday he goes into class and feels like it is NOT OK to make mistakes.

He has come home from school telling me that everyone gets three warnings before they have to move their name to yellow, but he never gets a warning at all, she just tells him to move his clip. And there have been times where he says this other child did it and then he did it but he is the only one that got into trouble. He gets in trouble for the most absurd things. He brought a note home saying he got a yellow light for picking up a pen. I called the teacher and asked her if she could give me more information because there had to be more to the story than him picking up a pen. She told me that he picked up a pen that he was not invited to pick up. WHAT? What the heck does that even mean and why on earth would you give a child a yellow light for that? Tell him to put it down and move on. But now you made him get up in front of the class and move his name to yellow and there goes the self-esteem once again. And once again he feels like it is not ok to make a mistake.

So it is little things like this that I always worried about but just told my son to do his best and try and stay away from this other child. But now, after all this with the para, I feel like he is in a class where nobody has his back. I worry that he is not being treated fairly or if he is OK. He is so hard on himeself as it is. To accuse him, yell at him and tell him there will be major consequences if he does it again without even asking him what happened...it just seems hostile to me. He did not even do what he was getting yelled at for! He will always be wrong, no matter what. That is very clear. And I don't feel that is a safe place for a 6 year old to be. He has to worry about all this crap going on in class AND learn? That is a lot to put on a kid.

 

[princessmom29]

I totally agree. It's just pathetic that teachers will treat children differently based on things like this. Teachers should teach children and base grades on the work, and behave professionally and kindly at ALL times.

When I was a chiropractor, I treated my practice members well even when they weren't following my advice, and that's no different. I never was rude to someone just b/c they did something else. Teachers should learn to separate their personal feelings from their professional, NOT talk about children to others (positive or negative, IMO), and TEACH. it's ridiculous that anyone should have to worry about dying on hills just b/c they'll have years in schools...honestly none of this should even be passed along once it's taken care of.




Hannathy didn't actually say he needed the para because of being violent. She said "this and that", not "this because of that". If the boy twisted the OP's son's arm, then he IS a danger to others, because while 6 year old boys can be hard on each other when they BOTH want to be, when it's a one-sided thing they can also be quite sensitive. Twisting the arm, whether it's a joint twist or twisting the skin around (what's the phrase for that nowadays?), would be PAINFUL.




My dad's mom didn't take his side, and my dad turned out abusive without trust in anyone. My mom took my side and I'm a generally nice person (did have to have some therapy from leftover nonsense from my dad) with trust, because I had someone on my side. I didn't respect my teachers because they constantly showed that they didn't DESERVE respect. They couldn't even remember my mom's last name! How sad is that? What if the teacher got married and I couldn't remember HER last name (assuming she changed it)? How quickly would I have gotten into trouble? (quickly, given my teachers) My paternal grandmother believed in respect even when they didn't deserve it...so she got her entire family PRETENDING that they loved and respected her, but really hating her (especially the children, she was MEAN)...my maternal grandmother was a doll who would have allowed us to tell her if she did anything wrong, and she got respect, love, and like from her grandchildren... Lip service for respect is useless IMO.


Any kid who has seen The Sandlot can easily pick up "you're killing me" (Smalls). That's where my son got it. He's 6. Says it when appropriate (or when he can get a laugh). Sometimes with "Smalls" at the end, sometimes not.




I didn't have your big highs or your same lows, but I can definitely relate.



So with THREE different stories, why are they going forth with ANY punishment for the OP's child?





I was basically successful in school, yet had NO love for my teachers. My teachers are the REASON I dislike the whole institution of school. I have many friends who are teachers, I read their vents on facebook, I talk to them in person, and I know ONE that seems to be a most excellent teacher. Funnily enough, she dropped out before graduation, got a GED...she did this after reading a book called something like Guerilla Homeschooling (not the actual name) and realizing she could LEARN so so so much more at home than at school, and she went and DID just that! We were stuck in prison memorizing and she went out and learned. I find it intriguing that she became a teacher, but I think she's probably just about the best at it b/c she knows what it's about, and it's NOT about punishing students for nonsense.



That's just awful, I'm so sorry.



I agree.




So the OP didn't get any good advice or kind words at all here?




My son can burst into tears if I look at him wrong...if I were actually being mean to him on every day we do learning work (we homeschool mainly thanks to what I took away from the "teachers" I had) I'm quite sure he would benefit from counseling. Do you really think that an adult that spends 40 hours a week with a 6 year old is NOT going to have repercussions on the child's development? Heck, I had to take FMLA for myself, for my own mental health, thanks to my BOSS...again, 40 hours a week was spent with him, less one-on-one time than when I was in school...you bet your bippy I think a bad teacher will mess with a little kid's head!

you really want to know what I think? I think that chidren need to be taught how to DEAL with the every day little things, not sent to therapy for them. I teach DD that she cannot control what other people do and say, but she CAN control her reaction to it. I don't encourage making a huge issue out of something small, like a hurtful comment, but rather i encourage dealing with it and moving on. Becuase i have been following this track for most of her life, most things that people say that are meant to be hurtful just roll right off her back. She is a very sensitive child who cares deeply for others and sticks up for her friends, but has learned that by not making a big deal of something, you take away the powero f the other person to hurt. I see amny of her firends on the other hand burst into tears at the drop of a hat, egged on by parents that cater to that behavior. This leads to the teenagers I teach who cry to get their way, or bring omo to school to "talk to me", and adults who cannot handle a difficult boss or co-worker or an uncomfortable situation. My sister had an absolutely AWFUL teacher is 1st grade, and she was not scarred for life becuase she was taught at home that her teacher, or any one else for that matter, did not determine her self worth. She knew that what the teacher was donig was wrong, she could not change the teacher's behavior, and that it was no reflection on her. This woman made first graders sit all day with 2 feet on the floor in front of them, and both hands flat on the desk if they were not working, and NO talking of any kind, ever, or there were very stiff consequences. She was nasty to the kids on a regular basis, and seemed to particularly hate my sister. I had one of those teachers in 5th grade. Agian, not scarred for life, no therapy needed. I just ignored the behavior because I knew it had nothing to do with me. The teacher hated me becuase I was smart and becuase of the color of my skin, nothing more. In short, if you carte to the upset nad lead a child to believe they SHOULD be upset, guess what you will get??

 

[5lilfish]

you really want to know what I think? I think that chidren need to be taught how to DEAL with the every day little things, not sent to therapy for them. I teach DD that she cannot control what other people do and say, but she CAN control her reaction to it. I don't encourage making a huge issue out of something small, like a hurtful comment, but rather i encourage dealing with it and moving on. Becuase i have been following this track for most of her life, most things that people say that are meant to be hurtful just roll right off her back. She is a very sensitive child who cares deeply for others and sticks up for her friends, but has learned that by not making a big deal of something, you take away the powero f the other person to hurt. I see amny of her firends on the other hand burst into tears at the drop of a hat, egged on by parents that cater to that behavior. This leads to the teenagers I teach who cry to get their way, or bring omo to school to "talk to me", and adults who cannot handle a difficult boss or co-worker or an uncomfortable situation. My sister had an absolutely AWFUL teacher is 1st grade, and she was not scarred for life becuase she was taught at home that her teacher, or any one else for that matter, did not determine her self worth. She knew that what the teacher was donig was wrong, she could not change the teacher's behavior, and that it was no reflection on her. This woman made first graders sit all day with 2 feet on the floor in front of them, and both hands flat on the desk if they were not working, and NO talking of any kind, ever, or there were very stiff consequences. She was nasty to the kids on a regular basis, and seemed to particularly hate my sister. I had one of those teachers in 5th grade. Agian, not scarred for life, no therapy needed. I just ignored the behavior because I knew it had nothing to do with me. The teacher hated me becuase I was smart and becuase of the color of my skin, nothing more. In short, if you carte to the upset nad lead a child to believe they SHOULD be upset, guess what you will get??

That's pretty much what the therapist is teaching.. I guess you could argue that I could teach that on my own, but some kids just react better to someone other than Mom/Dad. Also, my son, at 8 (after this teacher got to him) was saying scary things about how we would be better of without him. I felt that it was safer to allow a professional to work with him and be sure that my son was not going to hurt himself. It's great that you were able to do that without help, but I have no problems with the decisions we made.

Jess

 

[Wishing on a star]

Kappy,
I think it is clear, that for whatever reason (probably a combination of this Para's actions, and perhaps a personality clash with the teacher), your son's classroom has become a hostile learning environment.

And, yes, you do have rights....

The only problem is, you have absolutely ZERO chance of proving 'hostile environment'... Not only do you have staff members who will bend the stories, blame the child, and outright bold-faced lie... You do not have any direct written history of your child being disciplined... no visits to this lame excuse for a Principal's office, No detentions, No suspensions.... I'll bet that nothing except a few things like that little note have ever been put in writing. I'll bet there are no memo's, emails, etc... I am assuming that these people are smart enough to not leave a paper trail. I'll bet there is very, very, little in your child's file.

If the school did try to enforce any disciplinary measures ( ie. those SERIOUS CONSEQUENCES ) you would have every right to contest this and file a grievance.

You have rights, but they would entail hiring a lawyer or educational advocate... spending lots of time... missing work and income if you have a job... And, to be honest, the psychological and emotional stress would have a completely devastating toll on you and your child.

As much as I would love to be able to say "Stand up for your child. Fight and win..." Based on my personal experience... for me... I know that was not a path that I was ready or willing ( or even able) to take.

Again, you have my understanding and well wishes.

 

[Wishing on a star]

you really want to know what I think? .....

I think that I would have no respect and give no weight whatsoever to a person who would issue such comments and judgments.

Other than that, what I think could not be posted here on the DIS without being censored.

 

[palavra]

I think that I would have no respect and give no weight whatsoever to a person who would issue such comments and judgments.

Other than that, what I think could not be posted here on the DIS without being censored.

And yet Princessmom29 is the one in the classroom day in and day out seeing things as they really are, not how they are often told at home.

Kappy, if you do not trust your child's teacher, then you need to remove him-period.

 

[PaulaSB12]

you really want to know what I think? I think that chidren need to be taught how to DEAL with the every day little things, not sent to therapy for them. I teach DD that she cannot control what other people do and say, but she CAN control her reaction to it. I don't encourage making a huge issue out of something small, like a hurtful comment, but rather i encourage dealing with it and moving on. Becuase i have been following this track for most of her life, most things that people say that are meant to be hurtful just roll right off her back. She is a very sensitive child who cares deeply for others and sticks up for her friends, but has learned that by not making a big deal of something, you take away the powero f the other person to hurt. I see amny of her firends on the other hand burst into tears at the drop of a hat, egged on by parents that cater to that behavior. This leads to the teenagers I teach who cry to get their way, or bring omo to school to "talk to me", and adults who cannot handle a difficult boss or co-worker or an uncomfortable situation. My sister had an absolutely AWFUL teacher is 1st grade, and she was not scarred for life becuase she was taught at home that her teacher, or any one else for that matter, did not determine her self worth. She knew that what the teacher was donig was wrong, she could not change the teacher's behavior, and that it was no reflection on her. This woman made first graders sit all day with 2 feet on the floor in front of them, and both hands flat on the desk if they were not working, and NO talking of any kind, ever, or there were very stiff consequences. She was nasty to the kids on a regular basis, and seemed to particularly hate my sister. I had one of those teachers in 5th grade. Agian, not scarred for life, no therapy needed. I just ignored the behavior because I knew it had nothing to do with me. The teacher hated me becuase I was smart and becuase of the color of my skin, nothing more. In short, if you carte to the upset nad lead a child to believe they SHOULD be upset, guess what you will get??

That is not easy to do I had a head teacher who accused me of cheating on any question that I got right. In religious education said infront of the entire class this idiot believes in heaven and hell who told me if I was as stupid as you I would kill myself it is not always easy to brush this sort of thing of and if therapy helps its better than the alternative that children take of suicide. To the op I would be trying to get the school principle the sack he is not up to his job if he is doing this to kids.

 

[luvsJack]

This is exactly how I feel. DS is seeing a couselor for anxiety and low self esteem. The self-esteem issues increased 110% since he started school this year BECAUSE of what is going on in class. The therapist is helping him with his anxiety and trying to get him to find his voice because he does not stick up for himself. He is trying to teach my son it is OK to make mistakes and that he is a great kid. But everyday he goes into class and feels like it is NOT OK to make mistakes.

He has come home from school telling me that everyone gets three warnings before they have to move their name to yellow, but he never gets a warning at all, she just tells him to move his clip. And there have been times where he says this other child did it and then he did it but he is the only one that got into trouble. He gets in trouble for the most absurd things. He brought a note home saying he got a yellow light for picking up a pen. I called the teacher and asked her if she could give me more information because there had to be more to the story than him picking up a pen. She told me that he picked up a pen that he was not invited to pick up. WHAT? What the heck does that even mean and why on earth would you give a child a yellow light for that? Tell him to put it down and move on. But now you made him get up in front of the class and move his name to yellow and there goes the self-esteem once again. And once again he feels like it is not ok to make a mistake.

So it is little things like this that I always worried about but just told my son to do his best and try and stay away from this other child. But now, after all this with the para, I feel like he is in a class where nobody has his back. I worry that he is not being treated fairly or if he is OK. He is so hard on himeself as it is. To accuse him, yell at him and tell him there will be major consequences if he does it again without even asking him what happened...it just seems hostile to me. He did not even do what he was getting yelled at for! He will always be wrong, no matter what. That is very clear. And I don't feel that is a safe place for a 6 year old to be. He has to worry about all this crap going on in class AND learn? That is a lot to put on a kid.

Sounds to me like for some reason your child has been picked to be the one she doesn't like. (maybe she doesn't like sensitive little boys or something, who knows). I would document everything that has happened as much as you can remember and I would talk to his therapist about her opinion of having him moved to another classroom. The therapist could go a long way in helping to prove that he is in a hostile environment. Whatever documentation you have and whatever you can get from the therapist, take it to the superintendent and to the school board if necessary. If it is policy not to change classrooms, someone made that policy and someone can change it for you.

This teacher is going to make your child hate school and be terrified of attending. Its not fair for her to treat him that way and its time to put a stop to it. Do not stop until you get some action. In the end, you may need to homeschool him the rest of this year; but I would be on the ready for next year in case something starts up again. Teachers do talk and you want to be ready. Yes, you may be known as "that parent", but I would perfer that to my child being mistreated.

 

[luvsJack]

you really want to know what I think? I think that chidren need to be taught how to DEAL with the every day little things, not sent to therapy for them. I teach DD that she cannot control what other people do and say, but she CAN control her reaction to it. I don't encourage making a huge issue out of something small, like a hurtful comment, but rather i encourage dealing with it and moving on. Becuase i have been following this track for most of her life, most things that people say that are meant to be hurtful just roll right off her back. She is a very sensitive child who cares deeply for others and sticks up for her friends, but has learned that by not making a big deal of something, you take away the powero f the other person to hurt. I see amny of her firends on the other hand burst into tears at the drop of a hat, egged on by parents that cater to that behavior. This leads to the teenagers I teach who cry to get their way, or bring omo to school to "talk to me", and adults who cannot handle a difficult boss or co-worker or an uncomfortable situation. My sister had an absolutely AWFUL teacher is 1st grade, and she was not scarred for life becuase she was taught at home that her teacher, or any one else for that matter, did not determine her self worth. She knew that what the teacher was donig was wrong, she could not change the teacher's behavior, and that it was no reflection on her. This woman made first graders sit all day with 2 feet on the floor in front of them, and both hands flat on the desk if they were not working, and NO talking of any kind, ever, or there were very stiff consequences. She was nasty to the kids on a regular basis, and seemed to particularly hate my sister. I had one of those teachers in 5th grade. Agian, not scarred for life, no therapy needed. I just ignored the behavior because I knew it had nothing to do with me. The teacher hated me becuase I was smart and becuase of the color of my skin, nothing more. In short, if you carte to the upset nad lead a child to believe they SHOULD be upset, guess what you will get??

This may be all well and true for some people but not every person has the same reaction to the same circumstance. A child should not have to put up with a teacher that is a bully. Period. And the parents should not feel uncomfortable in standing up for their child.

No, no one has to react to everything that is said to them. Dd has been told time and again not to let things another child says affect her. But, when a child is being constantly berated by an adult with authority over them; it can and will have an affect on that child.

I am so happy for you that you did not need therapy. That doesn't mean the same will be true for every kid out there. I didn't need therapy after my brother was killed in front of me in an accident, my co-worker had to have therapy when her neighbor was killed the same wway; should I just tell her to suck it up and deal with it? We all deal with things differently.

Some kids can let things just roll off their backs and some cannot; as a teacher you should know that.

 

[princessmom29]

I think that I would have no respect and give no weight whatsoever to a person who would issue such comments and judgments.

Other than that, what I think could not be posted here on the DIS without being censored.

well, you are certainly entitled to your opinion, but I fail to see how it is judgmental to suggest that children be taught healthy self esteem and coping skills at home???
As for judgement of the children I see every day, I call them like I see them. I have to form some kind of opnion if I am to help them. I constantly deal with parents who enable thier children's dependent behavior and teach them that everyone else is responsible for thier actions, and that ev ery percieved slight is a major issue. I do the best I can in my classroom to instill personal pride and responsibility, but by the time they get to me a lifetime of being told that they are a victim is very difficult to overcome. As a result of what I see every day, I choose to make an effort to teach my DD that SHE is in control of her own destiny and self image. How is that a bad thing?

 

[princessmom29]

This may be all well and true for some people but not every person has the same reaction to the same circumstance. A child should not have to put up with a teacher that is a bully. Period. And the parents should not feel uncomfortable in standing up for their child.

No, no one has to react to everything that is said to them. Dd has been told time and again not to let things another child says affect her. But, when a child is being constantly berated by an adult with authority over them; it can and will have an affect on that child.

I am so happy for you that you did not need therapy. That doesn't mean the same will be true for every kid out there. I didn't need therapy after my brother was killed in front of me in an accident, my co-worker had to have therapy when her neighbor was killed the same wway; should I just tell her to suck it up and deal with it? We all deal with things differently.

Some kids can let things just roll off their backs and some cannot; as a teacher you should know that.

I was in no way saying that no one should ever need therapy. I anm simply saying that the little things in lfe are just that, little things, and we as a culture need to teach our kids to deal with them in a effort to keep them from needing therapy. I really od feel that many in our socitey are too quick to turn to therapy as a replacement for solid parenting. Those little things should not be sending anyone into therapy, and ifthey do there is a larger problem at work than someone being mean to them. A teacher that is so detrimental to a child that the child needs therapy to deal with should not be teaching. That kind of behavior should get a teacher fired, period. There is a huge difference between a teacher that , for whatever reason, doesn't like a child and lets that be known and a teacher who is mentally abusing a child. I am absolutely not condoning either, but a teacher that does not like my kid is not going to have me up at the school screaming for her head, and abusive one would. We need to teach our kids to make that distinction as well. On the one hand you deal with it and hope for better next year. On the other, you take action.

 

[princessmom29]

That is not easy to do I had a head teacher who accused me of cheating on any question that I got right. In religious education said infront of the entire class this idiot believes in heaven and hell who told me if I was as stupid as you I would kill myself it is not always easy to brush this sort of thing of and if therapy helps its better than the alternative that children take of suicide. To the op I would be trying to get the school principle the sack he is not up to his job if he is doing this to kids.

agian a big difference between this and " the teacher doesn't like me" or "I got in trouble and someone else didn't" What happened to you was verbal abuse.

 

[luvsJack]

I was in no way saying that no one should ever need therapy. I anm simply saying that the little things in lfe are just that, little things, and we as a culture need to teach our kids to deal with them in a effort to keep them from needing therapy. I really od feel that many in our socitey are too quick to turn to therapy as a replacement for solid parenting. Those little things should not be sending anyone into therapy, and ifthey do there is a larger problem at work than someone being mean to them. A teacher that is so detrimental to a child that the child needs therapy to deal with should not be teaching. That kind of behavior should get a teacher fired, period. There is a huge difference between a teacher that , for whatever reason, doesn't like a child and lets that be known and a teacher who is mentally abusing a child. I am absolutely not condoning either, but a teacher that does not like my kid is not going to have me up at the school screaming for her head, and abusive one would. We need to teach our kids to make that distinction as well. On the one hand you deal with it and hope for better next year. On the other, you take action.

There is a difference IF the teacher that does not like the child is able to act like an adult and keep her likes and dislikes to herself. When she starts showing her dislike in a way that makes the child feel bad about himself/herself then that has become abuse.

I worked with children for about 15 years, 3 years as a teacher's assistant and 12 in child care. Of course you have some children that you just don't like as much as others for all kinds of reasons. But you NEVER let the child know it. EVER. This teacher and para have obviously let this child know that he is not liked. Whether someone actually determines it is abuse is beside the point, the point is the affect it is having on this child.

Incidently, if we were having this same conversation about giving people meds to deal with their problems, I would 100% agree with you. I firmly believe that meds are given to freely, but I personally think that most people would be helped by talking to a therapist from time to time.

 

[okeydokey]

well, you are certainly entitled to your opinion, but I fail to see how it is judgmental to suggest that children be taught healthy self esteem and coping skills at home???
As for judgement of the children I see every day, I call them like I see them. I have to form some kind of opnion if I am to help them. I constantly deal with parents who enable thier children's dependent behavior and teach them that everyone else is responsible for thier actions, and that ev ery percieved slight is a major issue. I do the best I can in my classroom to instill personal pride and responsibility, but by the time they get to me a lifetime of being told that they are a victim is very difficult to overcome. As a result of what I see every day, I choose to make an effort to teach my DD that SHE is in control of her own destiny and self image. How is that a bad thing?

I applaud the work you do. The return to reason.

 

[mhsjax]

I agree that kids need to learn to deal with small stuff, but there is no way that I would let my child stay in a classroom with a teacher or para or assistant or anyone that lied, and the para has admitted she lied. So nope my kiddo wouldn't stay, I would never believe anything that the teacher said about my kid.

Bad teachers are out there, my son had one in the first grade, she didn't like boys at all. I knew most of the boys in there and the moms and I were friends and we compared notes. I also have many friends with boys older than mine, they all said the same thing. When you had a conference with her, she would tell you that your son was below grade level. It happened to almost every boy in there, funny a lot of them ended up in gifted and my DS was in a higher level reading and math after he finished with her class.

But God has a sense of humor, she got pregnant and had a beautiful boy lol

People like her don't need to be teachers, they have no business around kids.