cancelled trip report - I may never feel like I can go again

[AnnaS]

 

[13littledogs]

I never thought I’d be writing something like this. For 15 years I’ve been sharing our family trips to Disney here, and it’s always been such a huge part of our lives. We were supposed to be leaving in two weeks to celebrate our 25th anniversary at Disney World. Instead, I had to cancel the trip, because my husband has left me for someone else.

Right now, my heart is broken. Disney has always been our special place, but at the moment, I don’t know if I can ever go back. Every trip, every plan, every dream for retiring and working part-time at the parks—it all feels tied to him and the life I thought we had.

I know time will help, and maybe someday Disney will feel like my happy place again. For now, I just needed to share with the people who understand what Disney means. Thank you for letting me put this out there.

These boards have been part of my Disney story for years, and right now I could really use some encouragement. Even if I can’t see it clearly yet, I’d like to believe Disney will someday feel magical again. Thank you for being part of this community and for letting me lean on you during such a hard time.

So very sorry. (hugs)

 

[mommasita]

I am so sorry you are going through this.
You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Cry it out, and then cry some more.

Once you can, wash up, try to attend everything you are invited to, and make your own plans too! Don’t let life pass you by, we have one go only. You don’t need him, and you certainly don’t need a cheater. I hope you find someone that values you, that tells you (and means it) daily they love you.

Don’t give him the power, don’t let him pay any rent in your heart. Once you cry it out, remember you have the power, not that louse.

 

[flyingdumbo127]

Just a hug and prayers. We care.

 

[bobbiwoz]

I am sorry this has happened. Hugs, and I wish you strength and courage as you go forward.

 

[lmbcdb]

May I be the little devil on your shoulder that reminds you that your idiot ex doesn’t deserve you and definitely doesn’t get to take away your “happy place”?

I literally laughed and smiled for the first time in days. Thank you.

 

[lmbcdb]

I am so sorry! You can get through this, I’m sure, and will come out stronger on the other side.

I sure hope so. Thank you for your sweet words.

 

[ShannyMcB]

So sorry you are going through this. Beyond your support in “the real world” know you have an entire team here on the boards rooting for you and holding you in our hearts.

 

[lmbcdb]

 

[Gabby01]

I'm so sorry. As others have said, give yourself time and grace to process this and grieve.

I know what it's like to have years of what you thought were happy memories turn sour when someone betrays you. It's like losing a part of your past and a part of yourself. We tend to think of happy memories as permanent, untouchable things but they're actually more fragile than that. It might hurt to think of those memories now, but eventually you will be able to sort through them and appreciate what was truly good while letting go of the parts that in hindsight, were not what they seemed.

As you make new memories without him, it will become easier to adjust. I agree that going to a different Disney park will help. Remember, you have so many people rooting for you to make it through this. You are not alone.

 

[lmbcdb]

So very sorry. (hugs)

Thank you. I love virtual hugs, because most people really mean it. (at least I do)

 

[lmbcdb]

I am so sorry you are going through this.
You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Cry it out, and then cry some more.

Once you can, wash up, try to attend everything you are invited to, and make your own plans too! Don’t let life pass you by, we have one go only. You don’t need him, and you certainly don’t need a cheater. I hope you find someone that values you, that tells you (and means it) daily they love you.

Don’t give him the power, don’t let him pay any rent in your heart. Once you cry it out, remember you have the power, not that louse.

Those are some of the best words I've heard/read all day. It made me cry, but in a good way. I've felt so alone for the past few weeks. I took a screenshot of your words and put it in my notes app, where I've started words of encouragement that I've read or heard.

 

[lmbcdb]

I'm so sorry. As others have said, give yourself time and grace to process this and grieve.

I know what it's like to have years of what you thought were happy memories turn sour when someone betrays you. It's like losing a part of your past and a part of yourself. We tend to think of happy memories as permanent, untouchable things but they're actually more fragile than that. It might hurt to think of those memories now, but eventually you will be able to sort through them and appreciate what was truly good while letting go of the parts that in hindsight, were not what they seemed.

As you make new memories without him, it will become easier to adjust. I agree that going to a different Disney park will help. Remember, you have so many people rooting for you to make it through this. You are not alone.

As I go through this, I'm finding more and more people who have gone through the same thing. I just never, in a million years, thought it would be us. I like what you said about as I make new memories without him, it will be easier to adjust. But those past good memories will always make me wonder if they were real or not.

 

[mommasita]

Those are some of the best words I've heard/read all day. It made me cry, but in a good way. I've felt so alone for the past few weeks. I took a screenshot of your words and put it in my notes app, where I've started words of encouragement that I've read or heard.

You are never alone. Just look at this thread
Love to you

 

[lmbcdb]

Just a hug and prayers. We care.

That's why I came here.

 

[lmbcdb]

I am sorry this has happened. Hugs, and I wish you strength and courage as you go forward.

Thank you - I am going to need all the strength and courage I can get.

 

[lmbcdb]

So sorry you are going through this. Beyond your support in “the real world” know you have an entire team here on the boards rooting for you and holding you in our hearts.

Thank you. That means a lot.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

Another person in your corner. We're here anytime you need to talk.

 

[honeymo78]

My ex and I had been together for nearly 15 years before he left for someone else. We had taken many Disney trips together, honeymooned at WDW, bought several DVC contracts, and were booked for a Member Cruise less than 2 months from when we separated. That was 12 years ago. I wasn't sure how I'd feel about going to Disney again, but I wasn't going to let him ruin something I love. My first solo trip was approx 6 months later, a few weeks after the divorce was finalized. My trips now are nothing like the trips I took when we were together, from hotels to dining to touring style. I was in a very dark place for a while, but I'm so much stronger and happier now.

Bottom line, I know it hurts but you are strong and will get through this, and Disney will always be there when/if you are ready.

 

[goofyernmost]

I never thought I’d be writing something like this. For 15 years I’ve been sharing our family trips to Disney here, and it’s always been such a huge part of our lives. We were supposed to be leaving in two weeks to celebrate our 25th anniversary at Disney World. Instead, I had to cancel the trip, because my husband has left me for someone else.

Right now, my heart is broken. Disney has always been our special place, but at the moment, I don’t know if I can ever go back. Every trip, every plan, every dream for retiring and working part-time at the parks—it all feels tied to him and the life I thought we had.

I know time will help, and maybe someday Disney will feel like my happy place again. For now, I just needed to share with the people who understand what Disney means. Thank you for letting me put this out there.

These boards have been part of my Disney story for years, and right now I could really use some encouragement. Even if I can’t see it clearly yet, I’d like to believe Disney will someday feel magical again. Thank you for being part of this community and for letting me lean on you during such a hard time.

I'm so Sorry to hear that. I know how you feel back in August 2000 my wife walked out after 29 years of marriage. No discussion, no build up, or maybe I was just not picking up on it. She had talked about leaving years ago when our daughters were 4 and 6, but we talked about it and she and I decided to stick it out a little longer. The weird thing was that the only reason she left was that she just didn't want to be married anymore. In court, it was that I was to controlling.

Anyway only a few months after that happened my daughter, her husband and her two step kids went to WDW for a week and wanted me to go with them. It was a good time to just reflect and realize that I was happier without her. I still cared about her, after all those years and she was the mother of my children. But, I guess things weren't all that great for awhile before she left. She waited for three months after our youngest got married. It had been planned for sometime. I was angry and hurt for a while, mostly angry for about a year. I had to reinvent myself and decide what I wanted to do next.

I found out on a trip to WDW about a year and a half after our divorce became final. I sat on one of the benches, yes, they had them then, and felt sorry for myself just reminiscing about how much fun we had as a family as our girls were growing up and all the things, good things that happened during that time and all of a sudden I kinda snapped out of it and decided to end the pity party and see some of the attractions that I had loved so much in the past. While listening to the song "There's a great big beautiful tomorrow starting at the end of everyday" it occurred to me that all I had to do is make a plan and also established some goals. I was motivated so as soon as I got home, I put my plan into action and within a year was back on track and life has been really good since that time.

Sometimes it takes a bit of time for any of us to dive deep within ourselves and realize that we create our own destiny and with renewed energy we go for it. Good luck with your life and remember about the great big, beautiful tomorrow. It really can happen we just sometimes have to give ourselves a little kick to get it started. There's no need to rush it, take whatever time you need to mourn your loss and cope with the unknown and uncomfortable, but it will happen.