Behavior Challenge Thread

[DisDreaminMom]

Grace, you made me cry. I hate it when I read stuff and it makes me cry! We need to take the last line of that post and write it in mirror letters and stick it on our foreheads. That way we'll see it a few times during the day and can't avoid it.

You know what's interesting? You mentioned that your DD said teachers don't listen to her. My son has problems with the teachers like that! I swear, the teachers that love my son are the ones that LISTEN to children. The ones who just want them to be cattle and shut up and walk through the chute can't stand him.

We had parent/teacher conferences last night. DS's teacher loves him. Her 15 year old son is a drummer and she was a saxophone player. She said, "Sometimes your son drums in class, so it's just like being at home with my son!" We laughed about it and she said she was working with him. They have my son typing his work into a computer program that reads the text back to them. They said it has helped him a lot, and I would agree.

Met school's Social Worker, too. She is African American. You know how DS is REALLY INTO people from other countries? So she introduces herself to me and my son says, "Ms. Blank, are you from Africa?". She turns and looks at me like I've got a White hood and a burning cross, IYKWIM. Seriously. If looks could kill, I'd have been a pile of ashes. So I then have to say, "You know how much he loves to hear about visits to other countries! He just loves other cultures so much, why a few weeks ago we were at Disney World and he met these ladies from Thailand....." Turns out a new child came to school that day from the Congo and DS wanted to meet her. That's why he asked if teacher was from Africa, because he had seen Social Worker helping her all day.

Also met with DD's Gifted Teacher. My new nickname for her is CHIP, cause she has one the size of Texas on her shoulder. I felt so bad for my DD last night. I don't see how she gets through the day with that one. The table I'm sitting at now has more personality. To top it off, this teacher has a child in the same school and the same grade as she teaches, just not in the Gifted program. There was a hint of, "Her math scores in standardized testing are just adequate. She's borderline and taking a spot from somebody else." (Standardized test math scores are low-in 70's, but she has a 95 in math for last grading period and scored 100% in every verbal test).

I had the snarky teacher's assistant giving me the Patronizing Look the entire time, too. DD basically missed an entire year of math instruction, as she was working on 3rd grade math last year and now in Gifted, is using a 5th grade book. So I told them I would appreciate any extra help they could give her or just tell me so I can get her a tutor if she needs it. (Patronizing Look passed around liberally, like a circle Patronizing Look-fest.) I finally just blurted out, "Well, no one was admitted to Harvard based on their 4th grade test scores!"

I seriously needed a drink when I got home last might. Too bad I don't drink.

 

[C&G'sMama]

Grace - All I can say is keep at it or put in her private school if need be but as someone else said can you make the district pay for it. It sounds like all your requests are being ignored, it sounds like the neuro's report is being ignored and what the heck kind of autism specialist do they have anyway? Ugh

Becky, you made me laugh. I'd clean a million toilets if some day DS actually had 6 or 7 friends to bring over, there's a reason we celebrated his Bday in Disney last year. But our friend and neighbor across the street just adopted 6 kids between the ages of 1 and 9 so I'm already planning a party a local bounce around place with one other girl from his class and we've got ourselves a party.

DDM, no matter how many times we go through it "they" (the school still makes us nuts) Since you don't drink how about some Halloween Candy we have at least 18 lbs in the freezer (it was 20 but there's been "leakage")

My vent for the day. Still trying to get DS into a behavioral group. Went over a month a go for intake and gave them all the day and times that would work for us. Hadn't heard from them so I called last week and they asked for the dates and times that would work for us (sounds like our paperwork got lost). So I gave them to her and we get a phone call saying they are putting together a group on this day at this time. Wasn't on our list. Why bother asking for days and times then. Just tell me when you're going to do it and I'll try to make it work. So I called back to tell them I'd make it work and now I don't know if he has a spot as they haven't called me back. I need to change his chess lesson, which is fine, but I need to let the chess center know what we're doing. UGGH!!!

Who on this board wants to take over scheduling and setting things up for our kids because it seems "they" make it a lot more complicated than they need to. Okay, just needed to get that out of my system. I'm going to try calling the behavior center now.

 

[GraceLuvsWDW]

Thanks for all the support everyone! I woke up in the middle of the night last night in a panic-don't know specifically what about - but all of this has taken an emotional toll on me. I was tossing and turning and finally silently vowed to mentally step away from the school fight. If you don't make a conscious decision like this you'll end up consumed by negativity! I can't change things-I wish I could but I can't.

On another note: dd had a dental appt yesterday. I'll spare you the long drawn out story but tell you she has an extreme aversion to the invasion that typically occurs in any medical/dental exam. So, to attempt cleaning, xrays, etc takes a very special person! DD had last been to dentist a year ago which went so poorly that every time we drive by the office she becomes distressed!

Anyway, I found a new office, explained her issues and told them to be very gentle and try to gain her compliance rather than forcing anything on her. We were in the office 2 hours and were taken VERY good care of by the dental hygienist and Dentist who took their time and were very careful. We weren't able to get the complete cleaning nor xrays but a positive experience nonetheless and we are to return every month until she complies with the procedures.

Now, my issue: dd has what appears to be by examination of the dentist a cavity in the lower teeth midway between front and back of mouth. She thinks it needs attention sooner rather than later. She discussed 3 options:
1. Demoral (sp?) and Valium cocktail-she said this won't gain compliance and might create a problem if she becomes uncomfortable with feeling "out of control"
2. Total Sedation-gas breathed that knocks her completely out-administered by an anesthesiologist
3. A drug that gives her amnesia for the procedure called Versed. No compliance is gained but she won't remember the procedure

Anyone have any experience with any of this? I am SO leery of doing any of this as last time they gaver her niteous oxide and it was a disaster.

Thanks!

 

[DisDreaminMom]

I do! I do! I do! We've done lots of dental work on my kids. Somehow, I've only got 1 cavity and I'm almost 40 but my DH has a mouthful of metal and I think kids inherited this gene.

Anyhoo, for DS's last procedure, we decided against the Demerol and Valium because unless you give it when the patient is completely CALM, it can ramp them up like a bad drug. This stuff totally depends on the patient's current brain chemistry and can turn into a super nasty crazy maker (technical term, I know). Unless you can be sure DD will be chilled out when you give this to her, don't do it. Because it would be like Superman tripping, if you know what I mean. My dentist said he's had some pretty bad reactions from the kids that have "underlying fear and anxiety" and he was not recommending it because he didn't want to have to physically restrain an amped up kid as big as mine.

We've done the Versed and strapped child down. Maybe kid didn't remember, but I sure as hell did. Never again. Uh-uh.

If you can afford it and most likely your insurance will pay for it if its a medical necessity because of Special Needs (but check it out and get it in writing) then do the total sedation. Only thing is they made my child drink some nasty stuff that put her out, but they may use something different for yours. You might feel like you are overreacting, but do yourself and her dental future a favor and get her put out for this.

Oh, I thought up a good one today. My DD was complaining about how much "pressure" we put on her (you know, pick up your dirty laundry, do your homework, don't use the calculator to to your math...). I'm sure someone has said this better but I'm so tired I don't remember hearing it. I said, "Hey, what's the difference between a lump of nasty coal and a beautiful diamond?" LOT'S OF PRESSURE!!!! (Much nasty nine year old grumbling ensued, but now under breath).

My point is, aren't we just going to be the shiniest little diamonds out there???

 

[C&G'sMama]

Just checking in and wondering how everyone is doing.
Grace, how are you? I imagine all this "stuff" has you worn down.
We're still waiting on the group to start. In the mean time DS is having more out bursts at home. Someone recommended a couple of books on The Explosive Child and a friend of ours is going to help us with "Social Stories".
The autism specialist assigned to our school called yesterday and chatted with DP. DP was encouraged but at the same time cautiously optimistic. While we know it's our job to take care of him we are finding it very frustrating that we keep hitting these walls. The school is being great at this point, now it's a matter of trying to get him other help.

Hope everyone is doing well. DP is going away for a PTA conference this weekend for a much needed break. The kids want to go to Parent's Night Out at the Y tomorrow so I'll have 4 hours alone. I'm planning on starting the packing for our trip to WDW in 3 weeks while they're out of the house. They don't know we're going.

Take care everyone.

-A

 

[GraceLuvsWDW]

Still trudging along here. OOOH a surprise trip??? How exciting! Wish we could sneak in your suitcase. I'm probably going to end up cancelling our Dec trip. Airfare is too high and I need some decompression. Eventhough WDW is my ultimate happy place, I think I'm going to wait until Spring Break to make the trek again. My AP rate is soooo good for the Dec trip though, it's hard to pass up! ($330 a night for Club Level WL)

Anyway, we are having highs and lows here. Some days go very well, others are horrible. I am going to the school today to have lunch with her. I will have to bite my tongue and stay away from everyone and put on my happy face.

I started Phono Graphix at home with dd. It's based on the book Reading Reflex. That's what they used with dd last 2 years at private school and it worked, so since she shut down and regressed I've started working with her at home. She has made some improvement! Still not back to a level she was at in June however. Baby steps.

The really bright note in our world is dd's horseback riding therapy! WOW!!!! She has REALLY taken to it and wants to quit everything BUT. The instructor is amazed at her capabilities and rapport with the horse. She usually waits until they are 7 to begin unled riding but she has begun trailriding with dd alongside her on her own horse and dd is doing amazing! It is helping with balance, coordination, and her self esteem. Plus, it is a good incentive to use to help her self manage her behaviors.

C&G, the Explosive Child really helped me. REALLY. I use Collaborative Problem Solving very, very often. The tips in the book DO help with our kids.
I refer back to the book often.

Have a nice weekend!

 

[Earstou]

Anyone have any experience with any of this? I am SO leery of doing any of this as last time they gaver her niteous oxide and it was a disaster.

Thanks!

Boy, that sounds just like ds!
Last summer, we had him put under by an anesthesiologist at the dentist's office.
We had tried to get a cavity filled about 2 years ago, but ds couldn't get past the shot. After this, we were informed by our dentist that we needed to take him to a pediatric dentist who could "handle" my son, that he wouldn't work on him again. We had already worn out our welcome with the only pediatric dentist in town who would allow parents in the room with the child (I had complained about someone in the office for mistreating my ds, who then lied about what she did and claimed my son was violent and kicking her). I told our dentist that I needed to be in the room, since I can sometimes avert a meltdown and/or talk him into allowing work to be done. So he found me a dentist an hour away! Yeah right, like an hour car ride to go to the dentist is going to work with someone like this!
Found another dentist who ds would allow to clean teeth. He wouldn't allow an exam, but did allow cleaning. Last spring they found out he was losing enamel, and needed the areas covered.
So, we decided the only way we could do the cavity and enamel loss was to put him under. (We had tried niteous oxide and it was a disaster for us too.) It was decided to remove his wisdom teeth at the same time, since they were starting to come in.
When they called his name, he jumped up and ran out the front door. My dh had to go and bring him back. Then, in the room, the anesthesiologist snuck up behind him and gave him the shot to make him woozy while we were talking to him. My ds shot out of the chair and left the room, knocking me and dh out of the room. We worried he might leave the office again, so we had to physically restrain him until the sedation worked. It was horrible, I was crying. Luckily, ds remembers nothing of those minutes. Except for ds "fleeing", it worked well, but it's not an easy thing for a parent to do!

Now, due to the pain from the wisdom tooth removal, he won't go back to the dentist, and I'm not sure what we will do for future care. Luckily, with him older, dentists and doctors are the only area where we have meltdowns anymore.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Earstou, sounds like a familiar story. Luckily, we haven't had anyone run out of an office, but I did when I was a kid. They wanted to stick my finger while in a routine doctor's visit (remember those HUGE lances they used back in the early '80's?) and I just took off out of there and down the road. I was maybe 8 years old at the time. It's funny now, but at the time I was terrified. The nurse was so nasty after that. They sent in the wrong medical records to my school on purpose and made a huge mess for my mom. She was not happy with me. DS kicked a doctor in the chest once because she was swabbing his throat for Strep. I didn't know she was going to gag the poor child. I didn't really blame him. It's a pretty natural thing to defend your throat.

Grace, do you want my pony? The riding for the handicapped people are looking at him to use in their program now- but if you want one, I'll send him to you. He and my DD just aren't going to be compatible. She's so A-type that she just freezes when he does anything bad, then acts like he did something personal. She doesn't have the, ahem, fight, that I do. She likes violin and riding the ancient old school horse that is so boring!

Plus I am finally realizing that my broken leg will never get better and my asthma flares up when I go to the barn (I'm horribly allergic to horses). It totally sucks to be an adult and have limitations. Honestly, I told my DH that I have more fun going to WDW a few times a year with the kids. It doesn't help that DS hates being at the barn. Not one bit. Kinda takes the fun out.

But Grace, I can say that horses are SUCH a calming agent for kids like your DD (and me) and you should do as much as you can to encourage this. Plus, barn time is such a great "currency" for a child like her. But just going out and hugging the horses or petting them can be the difference between a good day and a bad day. My advice- ask the people at the riding program if it's allowable for you to bring her out to have "face time" if necessary during the week. She doesn't need to ride, but maybe just feed one treats or brush a horse for a while. It may really help her to physically cope with the stresses in her life. Trust me on this.

We're OK here, too. Talked to DS's drum teacher today. After just a few lessons, he says he's super excited with DS's progress and can't believe a kid his age is able to read music and figure out the notes. DS still writes his 3's backwards, but I guess it's apples and oranges.

Hope you all are OK. Is anyone else excited about Christmas but dreading the INCONSISTENCY of the whole season and how it adversely affects our kids' behavior? Happy today is the first day of all-day Christmas music on the radio, but worrying about when the s%$# will hit the fan at DS's school. Because all those excited kids and special school day interruptions make my kid go nuts.

Is it bad that I am so sad we won't be going to WDW for Christmas this year? Is there some kind of treatment program for people like me?

 

[bookwormde]

Hi everyone,

GraceLuvsWDW, our children often have a “bond” with animals which goes well beyond what is typical, fining things that she loves is always the best thing you can do for here and her “spark”

All day at the Michelle Garcia Winters conference yesterday, I have followed her work and have found her books very informative, if not a little disjointed between them. Hearing her speak in person is truly amazing and it “all comes together”. If anyone has any questions please feel free to ask, when I get a little ore time I will get into some details. If she is ever in your area it is worth the $ to hear her speak.

bookwormde

 

[BeckyScott]

DS has to have general anesthesia to have any dental work done at all. Regular dentist, we're lucky if he'll open his mouth.

The one time this happened, we had to go two hours away to a (very good) children's hospital. I was so lucky, because he thought it was the most fun ever.

They gave him Versed to "chill him out" which did not work at all. On the gurney in the hallway, sitting up talking to the staff. No effect whatsoever. Talking more than usual, even. I thought it was funny, he never reacts to meds like other people do.

But he got to ride on a bed with wheels. And the staff there was so good, no poking of any kind until he was out cold.

It was much harder on Mommy than on DS.

They did everything while they were at it. Not just the cavities, but while he was out they did x-rays (since he certainly wouldn't put up with that cardboard thing in his mouth) and a full cleaning. Unfortunately, the down-side is that they found more cavities than they expected and who-knows-how-much metal got deposited in that child's mouth, which I was not happy about but by the time I found out it was done.

 

[GraceLuvsWDW]

Thanks everyone for the dental advice. I bet we end up giving her the total sedation, she won't even put the xray thingies in her mouth for practice at home (they gave me some to take home and practice with). I fear what the cost will be. What's funny is when I was a kid I had no idea I could run, I was so compliant and respectful/fearful of authority. Someone could stop me dead in my tracks with just a stern warning and yet duct tape, velcro, and a lapbar couldn't keep dd in that chair. when that fight or flight kicks in all bets are off!

We have the first fire in the fireplace tonight. It is in the 40's here in TX, blustery weather for us as we've been 70's and 80's with only a few dips so far. So I went ahead and took the opportunity for a fire. It's beginning to feel like the holidays are upon us.

I'm considering an electronic keyboard as a gift for dd this Christmas. Good for the eye hand coordination and she really loves music. I suppose it's no coincidence all our kids are drawn to music? I remember at a very, very early age, perhaps 3 dd was drawn to patterns. She would point out any organized repetitions in anything. But she's never really been drawn to regular music that you hear on the radio (it annoys her and she wants it off!) but she's VERY into sing-song rhymes and jingles. She makes up stuff, gets every little cutesy tag line stuck in her head, and sings all the time! So perhaps a keyboard will help that along a bit.

Oh, DDM how I wish it were so easy for you to send your little pony down and live the life of a horse in the barn just out the backdoor lifestyle! We are in a downtown of a small town and the neighbors probably wouldn't take kindly to a pony in our backyard! But if my dd keeps with the love of horses I suppose someday I may be trading this place in for 5 acres outside of town. Sounds heavenly and lonely all at the same time, if that's possible. I currently have a neighbor who is a little too in to Harleys if you know what I mean, no offense to those bikers out there but I am a light sleeper and waking at 3am to him playing out his midlife crisis (revving incessantly-does that build testosterone? ) is maddening!

I'd love to hear about the conference Bookwormde, if you thought it was enlightening I am sure we would too.

Hope all is well with everyone!

 

[bookwormde]

Wanted to get back with one of the more “funny” items from the MGW conference.

She said that she had “discovered a new skill that had been overlooked, teaching our children to be “bored”. Since it is one of the hardest ones to teach to NT children I am not sure how it got overlooked with our kids, but it makes a lot of sense.

Anyone had any success with this on their own.

bookwormde

 

[DisDreaminMom]

About the bored thing: there is nothing worse to me than a child who goes up to an adult and says "I'm bored!". This is like poking a hot branding iron in my brain. Seriously. Every single time a child sleeps over at my house, they have the audacity to say that to me at least once. It's really starting to irritate me.

So knowing that, my DS and his sister know not to ever say that to me because (now everybody repeat this together) "If you can't find something constructive to do inside or outside this house, then you are going to have a much bigger problem than boredom!"

I refuse to be the mom of kids that depend on adults for entertainment and a rollicking good time. Uh-uh. Not me. 9 (And I'm the one who took them to WDW three times this last year, so it's not like they're neglected or anything!)

The one thing my son can do well without fail is entertain himself for an extended period of time. We can go through a ream of printer paper in a couple of months from my kids drawing. I took them to the comic book store yesterday for the first time to start them reading those, too. My kids spent 6 hours playing outside on Sunday with nothing but the dogs and a wheelchair (don't ask!)

But we have no video games in our house. Our other motto is, "Do you want to play the video game or live the adventure?"

My daughter complains about the times she sleeps over at friends houses and all the kids do is play video games. She figures they can play a game without wasting her time (her words...)

(On that note, I got a note from the Speech Therapist the other day with his IEP stuff that said he was doing 100% in his testing, but that "He has an incredible imagination and we are working on telling true stories versus imaginative ones." Question: How does she know what's true or not? It's not like she spends every moment of every day with him. But this is the woman who had been convinced we lived in Paris, so I think she's just paranoid now)

Happy Turkey Day, everyone. Hope your holiday is wonderful and peaceful.

 

[C&G'sMama]

Regarding being bored. DS is a rules kid and we get a lot of. "I don't want to go, it will be sooo boring" Or "I'll be bored in the car with nothing to do" (this can be the 5 minute ride to Sunday school). So we try the logic and rules. Yes, it's hard to sit still but sometimes it's a rule that you can't have a toy with you or whatever it is. At home he's find if he complains about being bored he knows he needs to find something to do or we'll find something for him (that usually involves cleaning of some kind).

Although it's kind of funny there are some cleaning tasks that if he gets going on it, he loves. ie scrubbing the bathroom. The other day we were cleaning and the kids were doing their homework. He didn't want to do his homework. I said that's fine, your choices are your homework or help me in the bathroom, you can scrub the toiliet. He chose cleaning the bathroom, he loved it. I think part of it is he's really into getting order into his life right now. His room is kind of messy but he spends tons of time making his bed and setting things up, books, toys etc on his bed.

One more thing. We bought a treadmill a few months ago and about 1 month ago I finally finished putting it together. He Loovves it. The rule is a mom has to be with you while you're using it. It's down in the basement next to the washer and dryer so I can do laundry, sort laundry etc. while he's on it. We've had an old excercise bike down there for years that the kids use and he likes that but I think the "bells and whistles" on the treadmill make it more interesting for him.

Happy Thanksgiving all!

 

[DisDreaminMom]

I want a treadmill for DS, but I don't know where I'd put it. We settle for my DH taking kids to YMCA on Sundays and letting DS machine himself to death for a few hours. Plus, he loves the punching bags. And oddly, enjoys playing racquetball with my DH and his sister.

Did you know that you can bounce on an exercise ball and play the drum on it with drum sticks at the same time? It's like twelve forms of stimulation at one time. Plus it's not too loud.

I'd like to revise my previous post because I realized that HOME is not a boring place for DS, but if we go somewhere that he is unfamiliar with, he gets a mega case of the "I'm Bored's" and climbs up my a*# sideways. I don't think he's bored at all. I think he feels 1) uncomfortable, 2)unsure of what will happen, 3)unsure of the social expectations, etc.

Maybe the only way to vent this feeling is "I'm bored". Who the heck knows? Do I know how to solve this? NO. What do I do? I carry a small writing pad and a pen everywhere I go and I give it to DS when I see him needing a "place to go". It's astounding the things he draws when he's in this mode. Someday when I die, someone is going to find my ever-growing stack of papers that my son has drawn that I keep. Sometimes I send them to my Aunt who is an artist. She really likes them.

For a laugh, I'll share this: I was talking to my DH about something I wanted to see that was in Memphis. My son is walking through the room. He stops and says, "Memphis Tennessee or Memphis Egypt? Cause you know there are two..." Who the hell has a 7 year old that says stuff like that?

 

[Lachesis00]

I have one who is on the spectrum and has *had* (and every time he and dh get in a blow out, I just wait for DS to get physical... he is 5'9 give or take, DH is 5'5, 5'6 on a good day).

From when Joey was LITTLE, my mantra (for him) was (to tell him) to "walk away" "Just let it go". Hard when they are little, but at some point, it clicked. I haven't seen a major outburst in a couple years. He is 18 now.

Not to say he doesn't have his quirks still and they can drive me nuts. He is all about routine. I still watch out for that temper to explode, but it hasn't so far, knock on wood.
It was really hard until he hit 14-15. Especially since I am 5'. He has turned out to be pretty good. I still can put him in his place though.
I implemented the 2 hour rule (you know you drop something on the floor and it is the 2 second rule ). Mine is the 2 hour rule, if you (he) ticks me off, I have 2 hours for revenge At a younger age, it kept him on his toes.

koolaid/C&G-

My oldest DS has "anger management problems", too.

And I am telling you, I don't know what to do to fix it, but you want to get it fixed before he is 5'8" and 150 pounds and puberty hits full-blown. Trust me.

I get very scared not that I can't get him under control at home, but that he's going to "lose it" at school or out in public and have big trouble on his hands.

 

[GraceLuvsWDW]

Hi everyone!

Whew! Thanksgiving is over. Why are holidays so difficult for our kids? Chaos, change of schedule, change of weather all adds up to an out of sorts kid.

Play therapy is going well. The therapist is working with dd heads on and it seems to be helping. She is appalled at the school's lack of help. She (and I) think that with some support from them we could alleviate some of the anxiety. She gives dd coping ideas and is working hard at getting her to have a gesture she can use to show she needs help (by getting away from everything). Unfortunately the teacher is so busy with other behavior problems in the class that my frightened dd gets ignored. And to make matters worse, the teacher keeps moving dd's desk around (I don't know why ) which sends dd into a fit each time.

Regarding the dental work, I created a sort of social story, laminated the pages and we have been reading it everyday. It has pictures like a story board. It goes like this:

I have to go to the dentist.
The dentist will check my teeth to see if I have cavities.
I don't like to put the xray in my mouth and bite down.
The xray is too big for my mouth and I don't like it.
The dentist needs to take the xray to see if I have cavities.
It is important to let the dentist xray my teeth and to clean them.
If I don't let the dentist clean my teeth, I may have cavities that can make me sick.
I will open my mouth and let them put the xrays in and I will bite down.
It will only take a minute.
Then they will clean my teeth and put stuff on my teeth to keep me from getting cavities.
When the dentist is cleaning my teeth she will use a polisher.
It is noisy and feels funny but should not hurt.
If I need her to stop I can raise my hand and she will stop for a minute.
While I am at the Dentist I will lie down in the chair and not get up.
I will open my mouth when the dentist asks me to.
If I let the dentist take xrays and clean my teeth they will be shiny and white.
This makes my mom and the dentist happy and makes my smile pretty.

She loves the "book" and I am hoping it is getting her mentally prepared for the appointment. If I could get her to comply with these things it will make the rest of the work easier (I hope). I am so frightened of putting her "under" for the work. I'd really rather try for a less dangerous approach (that doesn't traumatize her).

I have been obsessing about our Dec trip to WDW. One day I think I'll just cancel and the next I am up all night finding cheaper alternatives. The problem is the cheap airfare goes out on 12/17 which is a Thursday so she would miss 1.5 days of school. The .5 I don't care about, it's movie day (someone tell me how that's educational) and dd doesn't do movies, at ALL. So I would keep her out that day anyway. But Thursday bugs me, the fact that she would miss a day and I don't want to set a bad example on that, especially when she's out for 2 weeks after that. So, I am waffling on it! The airfare I found is cheap-$257 RT. 4 nights. I booked the air for our March trip (free airfare on miles) so maybe I should just forgo the Dec trip and focus on March. Just thinking out loud here...sorry!

Was contemplating a Wii for Christmas for dd. Then we went to my friend's house whose dd had a Wii. Yikes! What a disaster. DD cried and was horribly frustrated that she couldn't work the remote. So I think that should wait for a while. I mentioned this to the OT and she says it's motor planning issues. I will have to find a present that works on that without the frustration. Still thinking about the keyboard. But wondering if the interest on that would be short lived? I've gotten many "horse related" gifts like sticker books & books, horse therapy is still going very well.

Hope all is well with everyone!

 

[C&G'sMama]

Grace,

It's good to hear from you. While it stinks the school is being less than cooperative, it's nice to hear there are some good things in the way of the play therapy and the horses.

DS was all set to start Social Skills group last night. We had him psyched. I left work early to pick up DD so DP could go with DS. DP gets there. They changed the start date to next week. They said they called and our home voice mail was full. Um, no it wasn't, as a matter of fact we had recently cleared out all messages so it was empty. And why not try at least one of the other 3 numbers you have for us? Needless to say a meltdown ensued, from DS, (mine came later.). Group starts next Monday. We'll be out of town the next 2 Mondays. DS doesn't know that yet.

I left a message for the group coordinator saying I wasn't overly happy with the way this whole process has been going and DP is ready to pull DS from the group as she has no confidence in this program. She called me back and was very nice. Yes, he can start in the 3rd week. And she said she could help get him into individual therapy after I told her no one else seemed to be able to do anything other than give us a list, that all our hopes are hanging on this group and it's energy zapping to have DS yelling he hates us and wants to hurt us on almost a nightly basis. I think that part got her attention. So he starts on December 21st, with no group on the 28th to resume January 4th. Hopefully after that we'll be able have a regular routine.

On a positive note. We leave town at noon on Thursday. The kids still don't know. I've been packing up in our room and we have stuff hidden in the basement. We arrive at WDW on Sunday (the 6th) until Sunday the 13th at which point we'll head home and get back home on the 15th. DS is fine academically. DD is struggling right now but I actually think it will good for her to have some individual time with us. We know the whole situation with her brother is putting a strain on her.

Well, back to getting them back on track with homework and bed time.

We're going to DISNEY WORLD

 

[DisDreaminMom]

DO NOT CANCEL YOUR TRIP! Please! I am so sad that I am not going for Christmas this year. What's one day? In an entire life, ONE DAY? (That's all. I'm done...)

OK, now on to Christmas ideas for Grace. My kids LOVE those little Schleich toys that you get at Tractor Supply or I think Toys' R' Us carries them now. Get her a bunch of those and the little barn they make. It's a super line of toys and they are portable and virtually indestructible. We have a ton of them and they are the first thing the kids play with in a pinch. Plus, there are so many other animals and cool stuff in that toy line, you can make quite a collection.

I dropped our pony off for a 90 day trial at the local handicapped riding program. I'm considering that paying it forward. Let's hope the pony is happy. I think he'll be OK if he has lots of kids fawning over him constantly.

DS got yet another instrument last weekend. My mother bought a mandolin from her neighbor. DS walked by me after she gave it to him and said, "See, I TOLD you I'd get another instrument." (He remembered our conversation at the music store where he was sobbing over getting a saxophone and I said he woudn't get any more instruments.)

I'm getting sick. Thanks a lot, Black Friday shoppers who went to the Disney Store! We were running a sale starting Monday that was buy one get one free on toys and plush. It's a super deal. Don't know if they'll end the sale on Wednesday, but if it's still on, then it's a huge bargain. Plus, if you use your Disney Visa, you get 10% off purchases over $50. Call to check the deals before you head out, since sometimes they stop and start sales with little notice. But still great for those of you who have rabid Disney fans out there.

There is an infrared remote control car there that is the best toy for our types of kids: all you do is slide your hand over this little bar that fits on your hand and an infrared light shines on the floor and the remote controlled car follows the beam of light. No great manual dexterity required. Low frustration level, IYKWIM.

 

[bookwormde]

Do not worry about missing 1.5 days, the last few days before Christmas and summer vacation are typically challenging and often disasters anyway, since what structure and predictability there is virtually disappears.

My DS has “issues” with coordinating the wii controller also, but has a great time providing tactical strategies to his brother, it is a funny to watch them.

bookwormde