I'm not against a cell phone for my child. she will have one that she can use to call us at anytime.
she just will not have one to use to call all her friends, text and play games until she has a part time job and will learn the responsibility of taking on a monthly bill like that. Cell phones are not toys. She will have one for when she needs to contact us but if she wants the full capabilities of the phone she has to be willing to work and pay the monthly bill for it
DH and I both have phones. He has his for work and his work pays his portion of the bill because it is essentially a work phone. I only have one because I drive now (yes I didn't get my license until I was 28 years old lol not even two years ago) and I'll need a way to call for help JUST in case. I almost NEVER talk on my cell phone lol. The only time I use my cell is if we are out and I need to call hubby and ask him what it was that he wanted me to pick up because I forget lol other than that I never use my cell phone. I can only think of 4 people that even have my cell phone number lol and that's my hubby, my mom, my dad and my inlaws. I never use it (at least not for phone calls... I use the internet capability on it a LOT lol)
We also have a vonage home phone. my family lives in canada... I call them EVERY SINGLE DAY. Our landline is not going anywhere. with Vonage it's FREE to call canada (thank goodness). there was a time where we had only cell phones but that just wasn't going to work for me. I lose signal in my house all the time and it's just too expensive to be calling international on my cell phone. doesn't make any sense to do that for me so we will have a landline for as long as landlines are around.
why do kids not call landlines? afraid they might have to talk to a parent? I want my daughter to be able to talk to her friends parents and not try to avoid them at all costs like not calling a landline in case a parent answers.
I don't think cell phones are bad. I like mine although I rarely use the PHONE part of it lol but I love it... and I know I said cell phones aren't toys LOL but Hannah uses my phone to play some little games and when she's sick she'll curl up in our bed and I'll open netflix on my phone so she can lay in bed and watch a movie lol. BUT at this age I also know she isn't going anywhere with my phone and isnt' going to lose it LOL
I don't have any ill will to parents who do get their kids phones. that's their choice... just as it's mine to not get a full capability phone right off the bat. That judgement street goes both ways... I won't tell anyone that gving their kids a cell phone is a bad thing or they shouldn't do it. So please don't tell me that I'm going to ruin her life because she won't have a cell phone lol.
And I know she's only 3 1/2 right now but she whipped out a "whatever" the other day
so how much longer do I REALLY have before the cell phone topic comes up lol not as long as some might think I'll bet lol. I don't know where she heard "whatever" but she certainly has the tone NAILED. She's 3 1/2 going on 13 so I'm sure she'll be asaking for her own phone next week
I bought my own first cell phone with my part time job. I paid the monthly bill. It was my responsibility. I REALLY appreciated that phone because I worked for it, I paid for it and it was my responsibility. In a world where my only responsibilities were school, work, and housework... having my own phone that I paid for and was responsible for was pretty cool
made me feel... grown up lol but I was also almost 18 at the time lol.
it's just the PERFECT thing to teach some fiscal responsibility, IMO. here is a phone... you may call home, our cells or an emergency contact. If you want to be able to call your friends and text then you need to work and pay the bill yourself (she would pay what ever the add on cost would be... not the full bill for a seperate phone on a seperate account). Then she'll either step up, work, pay the bill and learn a lesson or she'll just say screw it I don't want a cell phone that badly to spend my money on that monthly bill.
I couldn't say whether your child will ever need a phone or not. Like has been said, that is up to the individual circumstances. Your circumstances with the land line is different than ours, we had no reason for one and adding her phone was 1/4 of what we paid for the land line so it was basically a no-brainer on that.
If you never get your child a cell--your child, your choice. Just as getting a phone for my child was my choice. But, I do know that having a child at 3 and half is a very long way from having a pre-teen and knowing what they do or do not need.
I have been there 3 times and I know how many times the things I said when they were 3 went completely out the window when they were pre-teens/teens. Some of the "rules" make perfect sense when your child is curled up in your lap and make no sense what so ever when he/she is out doing what preteens do and having sports practice 3 times a week, gym 2 nights and there are 2 performances this weekend that she needs to be at. Or when she is staying with a friend who does not have a land line for the first time and you want to know she can get you when necessary.
When my oldest was around 8, beepers became all the rage and I said "NEVER!!". But, then he was 13 and wanted to go to the mall and we had a family emergency. I needed to get him fast but had no way to let him know to meet us. Luckily, his friend had a beeper and I had the number. I called and left the message to call my number. They did and we were able to get him much quicker. The next week ds had a beeper. No, I didn't have one when I was a kid and I lived through it, but I saw how much it helped me to reach ds in that emergency and the convinence was worth it.
I also said that dd would not have a cell until she was much older but then she would be at friend's homes who did not have a land line and she hated asking to use their cells especially if it was to call me to come get her. When I took her and friends to movies or the mall or skating; I realized NO pay phones. No way for her to reach me. So, she has a phone. Could she make it without one? Probably. But I see no reason for her to. Its easy, cheap and convienent. It makes me feel better knowing she can reach me anytime or that I can check on her and it makes her happy.
I agree that teaching financial responsiblity is important. Dd does that by earning her allowance through chores each week. With her allowance she buys all of her own personal items plus pays for all her outings, if she wants an expensive bat for softball she saves for it, I agree on $x for clothes and shoes, if she goes over she pays for it herself, etc. She would only pay any of the cell bill if she went over the regular bill, which she has never done.
I also agree that a phone is not a toy. Dd's phone makes call and texts, nothing else. She has a lap top for any thing else she wants that phone to do. But, that may change in another year. I have learned to never say never.
But, I don't consider her using the phone to talk to her friends as playing either
so maybe that is the difference in our opinions on that.
As for why the kids don't call a land line, I don't think it was about not talking to the parents--dd talks to all of her friend's parents all the time--I am really not sure why they wouldn't call one, but most would not. Maybe she was worried about it being the wrong number
I don't know, I have never asked. A few of dd's friends had land lines a few years ago, but none of them have them now, so its really not an issue anymore.
You mentioned something about knowing your daughter won't lose your phone so it sounds like responsiblity for the phone is a factor to you too. I have found that among the jr. high set around here they are pretty responsible for their phones. Dd did have one accident with a phone. She left it on the dog house when she was playing with her dog and the dog got ahold of the phone. She was almost at the end of her contract so she could get another phone for $40 and she did pay that out of her birthday money. Since then she has been very careful about where she leaves her phone.
But having or not having one is a personal choice. And then there is the choices of plans and phones and all the little extras. And decidiing when and where your child can use the phone and if you will take it away for certain things, etc. etc. etc.--all personal choices for each family and their own circumstancs.
I know of one family that the father finally gave in and gave their preteen a phone. Now every time she looks at the man wrong, he takes her phone away. She told dd that she wishes now that she had never gotten the thing!
Sorry if I was unclear about that in the original post.
