At what age is it appropriate to give your child a cell phone?

[redrosesix]

Well I'm from Canada so our schooling is a little different. There is no "Middle school", it's just elementary, jk - grade 8, and High school, 9- grade 12.

I gave my daughter her cell phone in grade 8 for graduation. Some students had one before then but why on earth would you need one before grade 6?

I live in Canada too, and our school system in Nova Scotia is not at all like this, although it is different across the province. In our city, all kids go P-6, then Junior High from 7-9, then HS from 10-12. But...if we move to the country this summer as planned, she will be attending middle school beginning in grade 6, or grade 7, depending on where we buy the house. And some kids go P-3, then 4-9, then 10-12.

Just a side issue, but I think that once kids are out of elementary school, activities and everything change. They might need a cell phone sooner than if they were still going to school with the little kids.

So, you won't get your kid a cell phone, yet expect kids who do have cell phones to let your child use their paid for minutes if she needs them? What if the child is paying for their own minutes with their own babysitting money and has limited minutes?

You really think this is ok to mooch off their minutes?

If you choose to not get your child a cell phone, then you should also teach your child that taking minutes from somebody else is also not ok. It is the same thing as saying "I am going to send my child to the mall, but if he needs some money for lunch, most kids have money, so he can just use some of theirs if he is hungry."

Your decision to not get your child a cell phone, no problem. But accept the consequences of your decision that your child might not be able to get in touch with you.

I think it pretty hypocritical to say "My kid can't have a cell phone, but in an emergency, they can just use somebody else's phone." If you think there is ever a need for your child to borrow a cell phone, it is time to get them their own.

I think it is a family's decision whether a cell phone is appropriate or not for their family. Their decision. However, the attitude that their kid can just use somebody else's phone is just wrong.

ITA with this.

I also have to add...
the event that made us all so happy we had bought DD a cell phone was not her getting out late or early from an activity. It was us getting caught in a sudden snowstorm on the way to get her at school. DH got stuck in traffic, roads totally unpassable. I tried calling the school so they wouldn't send her outside but I couldn't get through (obviously other parents were trying to do the same thing). So I called her cell which she turns on every day as she puts on her coat to leave. There were many many calls back and forth in the hour it took us to get her from school (and no way the school secretary would have let her use the phone that many times), most of them just her calling to update us on how many kids remained stranded at the school.

The greatest quote - real life is what happens when you're making other plans. There are so many things that could make us late to pick her up from either school or activities, and I wouldn't want her wondering even for a second when we'll get there.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

My kids got cellphones when they started walking home from the bus by themselves to a house that did not have a parent home. For our daughter that was 7th grade, for our son it was 4th grade. Our son barely uses his phone. Our daughter texts a LOT. We have an unlimited plan so we don't care about texts. As long as the phone is away during dinner and homework.

 

[cruisnfamily]

Right. I understand most people dont have landlines anymore but we do and will for the forseeable future. You dont have to have a landline to call a landline. People with cell phones can call landlines so her friends would still be able to get ahold of her quite easily

Plus you can send texts to landlines

HUH? How? No you can't.

 

[msjprincess]

HUH? How? No you can't.

Yes you can. It converts it to a voice message. I'm not sure about other carriers but I know that VZ charges you extra to do it. I think it's $.20 or $.25 per text.

 

[Planogirl]

We all got cell phones when we got rid of our landline. Our landline was just a way for businesses to try to sell their products or for collection agencies to call for the wrong person (common name) so I saw no sense in keeping it. DS needed a way to communicate so he got a cell phone.

 

[bethbuchall]

Yes you can. It converts it to a voice message. I'm not sure about other carriers but I know that VZ charges you extra to do it. I think it's $.20 or $.25 per text.

They are the same cost as regular texts on VirginMobile. The only time that we tried it, though, we must have received 8 calls over the course of 3 hours with the same text. So, we haven't tried it again or sent texts to other people's landlines for fear of driving them nuts. (Though my daughter may have accidentally sent one to a friend's home one day. The friend never said anything, and she was too embarrassed to ask.)

 

[mjkacmom]

I wasn't directing that at you. This topic comes up on The Dis at least once a month. Time and time again there are posters that make this a huge issue. Some posters are giving the cell phone way too much power. I understand that not everyone wants their kid to have a phone. No problem. But it does get old reading about how the cell phone has created kids that can't communicate or talk to adults, can't get homework done, staying up too late, etc. The cell phone isn't the thing that created that.

What I've noticed is that the parents who think cellphones are a negative devices don't have children who have them. I would guess that 99% of parents who have children with cellphones would say that they make life easier, that everyday life has improved because of them. After going on a family cruise, and having them off for a week, I am amazed at how much easier life is with them!

 

[mjkacmom]

why do kids not call landlines? afraid they might have to talk to a parent? I want my daughter to be able to talk to her friends parents and not try to avoid them at all costs like not calling a landline in case a parent answers.
.

By the time your child is in middle school, I'm betting most people won't even have landlines. However, if your child was in middle school today, she might be calling her friends' landlines, but I'm betting they're not calling her back. And she would, without a doubt, be missing out on a lot of social activity, with some really great kids.

As for the fact that you saved for your phone, it was a sign of adulthood, etc., it's not the same anymore. Heck, I went off to college with a portable WORD PROCESSOR, and I was the envy of many. Should I hold off on getting my kids a word processor until college?

 

[debster812]

DS got his phone for his 12th birthday (2 years ago). About 6 weeks later, he went to his 1st overnight camp with his soccer team, and I felt better knowing he could reach us, and we could reach him. It really was for our convenience, as this was around the time we started carpooling to practices (practice facilities are anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour from our house), and he'd occasionally walk home from school with friends.

I really don't think there is ANY hard and fast rule for stuff like this. Are there some 8 years olds who 'need' cellphones? Sure. Was my child one of them? No. Does that mean those families are wrong? No way.

 

[sparks19]

By the time your child is in middle school, I'm betting most people won't even have landlines. However, if your child was in middle school today, she might be calling her friends' landlines, but I'm betting they're not calling her back. And she would, without a doubt, be missing out on a lot of social activity, with some really great kids.

As for the fact that you saved for your phone, it was a sign of adulthood, etc., it's not the same anymore. Heck, I went off to college with a portable WORD PROCESSOR, and I was the envy of many. Should I hold off on getting my kids a word processor until college?

Please don't ridicule me because my parenting choice is different than yours. Thanks

 

[s____!]

I got one in middle school, once I started having extracurricular activities that changed my schedule around randomly. This was before everyone had a cell phone, so my parents didn't really have to worry about me wasting my minutes calling friends (I used the house phone for that) and I didn't have texting.
I know a 7-year-old who has had a phone since she was 5 maybe? I would normally say "I can't believe her mother would get her a phone so young!" but I know the mom, she is an idiot, so I can believe it. I felt sorry for anyone who has their number in her phone, because she really likes to call and text. A lot.

 

[Binnie]

I haven't read through all the responses, but I have to say that I would love to be able to give my 5-year-old a phone. (Don't get me wrong, I know that would be insane, but it would be nice.)

There have been times when it would've been really useful for her to talk with me when the grown-ups around here didn't give her the option to call me--or worse told her that they would call me and didn't. I would love for her to know that she ALWAYS has a direct link to me.

But I think the decision depends on the kid and the family. 10ish seems reasonable to me from an ability to be responsible perspective.

 

[Ceila]

Please don't ridicule me because my parenting choice is different than yours. Thanks

I saw nothing in her post ridiculing your parenting choices. The post of yours that she quoted made a ridiculous assumption, that kids use cell phones to avoid talking to parents. Perhaps when you stop making assumptions about things you really don't know much about, others will take your posts more seriously.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I saw nothing in her post ridiculing your parenting choices. The post of yours that she quoted made a ridiculous assumption, that kids use cell phones to avoid talking to parents. Perhaps when you stop making assumptions about things you really don't know much about, others will take your posts more seriously.

I know right?

My oldest is almost 20 (on Tue!) and I talk to her more on her cellphone that when she is here and we are face to face.

I don't even understand why she posted that kids want cell phones to avoid talking to parents. That does not even make any sense...

 

[sparks19]

I saw nothing in her post ridiculing your parenting choices. The post of yours that she quoted made a ridiculous assumption, that kids use cell phones to avoid talking to parents. Perhaps when you stop making assumptions about things you really don't know much about, others will take your posts more seriously.

uh no... someone said they wouldn't call landlines and I was asking WHY.

Did you miss the question mark after the line "so they don't have to talk to parents?" that was the only thing I could think of at the time for why kids would only call a direct cell phone and not a landline. it was a question not an assumption. I used the appropriate punctuation

So again I asked a question... don't ridicule me because I'm not all gung ho about a cell phone and others are I personally don't care if other kids have cell phones. It's a parenting choice for sure but I don't think those parents are sily or stupid for getting phones for their kids. I just have a different viewpoint on cell phones and while it's not popular, it isn't going to RUIN my kids life and doom her to never have any friends ever in life lol

Thanks

 

[Tasha+Scott]

Dd is my oldest and she is only 5 (will be 6 in a couple weeks) so I am not at a point where we are even thinking about cell phones for the kids yet so any # of things could cause my opinion on this to change over the years.

BUT, as of right now, I will probably get my oldest a cell phone when she is between 12 and 13. It will be when I know she and her brother will be going home alone after school for the couple hours dh and I would still be at work. I want her having one for emergency purposes in that case. I'll figure out the rest when we are closer to those ages.

I didn't have a cell phone as a kid or a teenager and I can remember a few instances where I was in situations where it would have been REALLY nice to have one to reach my parents. That does affect my feelings on it of course.

 

[sparks19]

I will add... I know how frustrating it can be to not be able to get ahold of someone when you want to in this day and age....

My mom does not have a cell phone and doesn't want one. well that's fine the majority of the time since I talk to her on the landline every day BUT

When they come to visit us it's a 9 hour drive and it drives me CRAZY that they don't have a cell phone so I can get a hold of them if I need to while they are en route and most importantly that they don't have a cell phone that they can use to call ME if something happens. Of course they could call collect if they can find a payphone but it seriously drives me CRAZY that she doesnt' have a cell phone and I can't contact her while they are on the way here lol

 

[luvsJack]

I saw nothing in her post ridiculing your parenting choices. The post of yours that she quoted made a ridiculous assumption, that kids use cell phones to avoid talking to parents. Perhaps when you stop making assumptions about things you really don't know much about, others will take your posts more seriously.

In sparks defense, she was asking if the reason kids won't call other kids on land lines is because they don't want to talk to their friend's parents. She didn't mean to not talk to their own parents.

She was simply curious as to why kids won't call land lines.

If I didn't have a 12 year old that used to not like calling land lines, I would probably wonder too.

 

[sjaakie]

I'm always amazed that those parents that shout "my kids don't need a cell" are the first to tell their own kids "just ask Suzie or Mike and use his or her phone when you need to call us".

 

[HonnyDipp]

My DD got her first phone at age 12. With Virgin Mobile. She had a few mishaps (downloading ringtones & wallpapers) but all in all she was doing really good. When she turned 16 back in March. I added her onto my Sprint account. She has the LG Touch Rumor and (knock on wood) she has been doing really good with it. It works well with the unlimited internet and texting. Plus she knows where to download free ringtones and wallpapers. My DS13 has had his virgin mobile cell phone since he was 12. He has been doing good, his talk time is based on his chores around the house and grades. Every 2 weeks, I add $20, he runs out of time, before that, he has no talk time.