Are people who have weddings on holiday weekends selfish and rude?

[TinkBoo&ElliesMum]

Originally posted by Bob Slydell
DS' birthday is Labor Day weekend -- so I guess we've been rude these past years having family over for his birthday during Labor Day weekend??

Yes dang it! You should have thought about it BEFORE having him, next time make sure to consult the calendar to make sure the due date falls on a more suitable date for everyone else.

 

[Bumbles]

Bob, you total CAD!

And your son too..how DARE he emerge from his mother's womb on a day that might fall on a holiday weekend

Clearly, he got his rudeness from his father

 

[Bob Slydell]

Originally posted by TinkBoo&ElliesMum
Yes dang it! You should have thought about it BEFORE having him, next time make sure to consult the calendar to make sure the due date falls on a more suitable date for everyone else.

Heck, my sister didn't get this advice either -- she's due on Christmas Day! (Man, that's gonna mess up THAT holiday!! )

 

[wdwdvcdad]

the OP is right.

 

[NMAmy]

This reminds me of what happened with my wedding. My ex was in the Army and couldn't get leave to come home from Germany. (This was 1985 and there were terrorist bombings there). He was supposed to be home in August but it kept getting moved back. In Nov, I found out he would be able to come home in December. The only date the church was available was 12/21.

Most people were understanding and knew the situation. However, the best man's girlfriend threw an absolute hissy fit and called me screaming that I purposely ruined her birthday by having my wedding that day and wanted me to move it. Umm...gee, no thanks.

Why do people take it so personally? Weddings are usually set up when a venue is available and it's convenient to the main participants. As others have said, if you don't want to go--don't.

 

[southernclass]

Originally posted by spagheddie
One of my all time pet peeves. There's nothing worse than ruining a long weekend then by having to go to someone's wedding. So-so food, lame crowd, and in the summer sweating my "you-know-what's-off" in a suit.


I got married on New Years Eve and at a 100 dollars a plate including a fireworks display to die for I don't think too many of my guests were angry. No one can MAKE you do anything.

Perhaps you should have just declined than to go and then get ticked off about it.

Some people actually like to spend the holidays with their friends and family, but that must be on another planet

 

[Bob Slydell]

Originally posted by Bumbles
Bob, you total CAD!

And your son too..how DARE he emerge from his mother's womb on a day that might fall on a holiday weekend

Clearly, he got his rudeness from his father

Well, at least he emerged before kickoff, so I didn't miss the Browns' game that day.

 

[TinkBoo&ElliesMum]

Originally posted by Bob Slydell
Heck, my sister didn't get this advice either -- she's due on Christmas Day! (Man, that's gonna mess up THAT holiday!! )

DS was due on Halloween, really could have messed up everyones trick or treating This one is technically due on the 4th of July which DH is hoping for, he wants to play Lee Greenwood while I'm in labor

But yes, you AND your sister should have gotten the memo - how rude of you, your poor family!

 

[Toby'sFriend]

Well, at least he emerged before kickoff, so I didn't miss the Browns' game that day.

well I can't tell you the angry reaction I got when Baby Brett's due date was announced as Super Bowl Sunday. DH insisted that one had to be rescheduled. :lol:

As for the OP, if you don't like the date then don't attend the wedding.

 

[spagheddie]

Originally posted by Bob Slydell
DS' birthday is Labor Day weekend -- so I guess we've been rude these past years having family over for his birthday during Labor Day weekend??

Unless your son's bday involves formal attire,a ceremony, cocktail hour (which may or may not begin soon after the ceremony ends), dinner (hope it's a buffet or the wait staff hustles), and dancing, all lasting from late morning to probably well into the night, than it's probably ok.

 

[Figaro]

When you care about the people who are getting married, you do what you can to be at their wedding. Being critical of them for the date that they choose for their wedding and being upset about it says a great deal about how you feel about those people. I am sure that they would MUCH rather have you not attend since it appears that you really don't want to celebrate the occasion of their marriage with them.

Weddings are joyous family occasions and I really wish that people who don't want to go would please just stay home. And as for the excuse that other family members will be upset...well, if you choose to go to a wedding then you need to go and quit complaining. I personally find very little that is ruder than someone criticizing and complaining about what is supposed to be a wonderful time to celebrate a couple who are getting married.

 

[Serena]

Selfish and rude?


Yeah, selfish and rude. How dare someone have a day they consider special. A day that they want the people in their lives to share with them. How dare they try to choose a day that would be convenient for people to travel if neccessary.
No, they should go to a JP, or elope! It would be imposing on others to have to show up for a wedding and be dressed up. It might even be too selfish and rude to expect them to enjoy themselves and not complain.


Selfish and rude? the op needs to look in the mirror.

 

[elgerber]

Originally posted by KarenC
We were married on Labor Day weekend. Most of our guests had to travel from out of town to celebrate with us. Having the extra day before they had to get back to work made it easier for them. I don't remember anyone complaining--those who wanted to be there were, and those who couldn't didn't come. I love having a long weekend close to our anniversary so we can get away to celebrate.

We did the exact same thing. I had people coming from Seattle and Ohio and other places in between. They appreciated having the extra day for travel. I guess I should call them an apologize for ruining their weekend 14 years ago?

Erika

 

[debster812]

To the OP--if you don't like the date chosen by the couple for their wedding--graciously decline. End of story. No one 'makes' you attend a wedding (unless you are the bride or the groom, then your precense is pretty much a given)

I guess I am doubly selfish and rude.

DH and I were married on the Saturday of Columbus Day weekend (long weekend here in NE)

DS was born June 2nd, which is usually QUITE close to Memorial Day weekend, and we have had his party on Memorial Day weekend days before.

 

[monkeyboy]

Originally posted by debster812
No one 'makes' you attend a wedding (unless you are the bride or the groom, then your precense is pretty much a given)

 

[Sandy V.]

People get all bent out of shape about this kind of stuff because of the "I, me, my" syndrome.

"How dare your schedule your wedding on MY holiday weekend? I want to do something else and you have now ruined it for ME."

Sure seems to me that the "selfish" meter tips more in their direction than that of the bride and groom.

Either attend with genuine feelings of good wishes for the couple, or send your regrets and stay at home (or go to the beach, or whatever).

The people that attend weddings out of resentful obligation and/or those that spending their time making catty remarks and observations about the food et al. are so "pleasant" to deal with. Really makes you wonder why they even bothered to be there - unless it gives them new material to complain about.

 

[Bob Slydell]

Originally posted by spagheddie
Unless your son's bday involves formal attire,a ceremony, cocktail hour (which may or may not begin soon after the ceremony ends), dinner (hope it's a buffet or the wait staff hustles), and dancing, all lasting from late morning to probably well into the night, than it's probably ok.

Actually, that wasn't in response to your wedding question, but rather a response to the other poster who expanded the rudeness to b-day's, etc.

But I will take your suggestions for my son's birthday party -- the cocktail hour and dancing 'til the late hours of the night specifically sounds like it would be a hit.

 

[kidzmom3]

I do not think people are being selfish and rude to have their wedding on a holiday, but I think many people on this board are rude. Saying the original poster is not "normal", flaming him/her for having a different opinion.

It is hard to have to go to a formal event on a holiday. Try to find a babysitter, pay more for a hotel because its peak time. Traffic considerations, air flight schedules/costs. If its a family member you may not have a choice to go. And lets all be honest. I know a lot of you have been saying you LOVE a wedding. They really are not that exciting. In my opinion they are for the couple, their CLOSE family (not everyone on the family tree) and their true friends. Many relatives that you see only occasionaly and casual friends get invited and do come, but they don't share the excitement of the core group. My opinion, flame away.

 

[mickeyboat]

My DD's birthdays are just before and just after Labor Day. For 3 years we have had their party on Labor Day. We do it later in the afternoon on Monday and serve dinner so people can get home from wherever they were and don't have to cook! We also have one party for both kids so people don't have to attend two parties.

I would hope that is people felt it was too much of an imposition to be there, that they would just stay home.

Denae

 

[Amy]

When scheduling a wedding, like most things in life, you can't please everyone. The bride and groom take priority - it's THEIR day, so they can choose whatever day they like. If you feel so strongly that it will ruin your holiday weekend to attend the wedding, then don't go.

DH and I got married over Labor Day weekend 20 years ago - both of us have families who live out of town, and we wanted them to have that extra day for travel.