Anyone out there have "fear of flying" and what do you take/do?

[edk35]

I posted this on the transportation board but thought I might post here too. TIA


My 16 year old son who has been flying since he was 6 months old, flew 5 times in 2012.....and last flew in 2013 and does not want to FLY again. We have driven a few times since 2013. We had a couple of ROUGH flights in 2012 and 2013 and now he does not want to ever fly again. I have always wanted to go to Disney in Oct. for the decorations, food and wine and MNSSHP and my husband suggested yesterday than my son and I go since I have a friend who will be there in Oct. with her son. SO I immediately booked a resort but now he is balking at going. He wants to drive, but we live in MD and can't take the time to drive for a Thursday departure and a Monday return. Any suggestions??

 

[Disneyliscious]

If he doesnt want to go, I wouldn't force him to. But that doesn't mean you can't go.

If you plan to talk to him, just tell him how thousands (maybe millions?) of people fly every day and the chances of anything bad happening are less than if you drove in a car (truth).

 

[ArwenMarie]

There are a lot of things to do for phobias, which is essentially what your son has. I would start with his doctor and see what they say.

I wouldn't want to force him to do anything he isn't ready to do. This will be something he will have to work on himself and when he is ready, he will do it. And he will need the motivation to push himself through the fear and uncomfortable feelings. Which may take a while to work through.

For now, could you take Amtrak instead?

 

[merrick]

i tried atavan first, did nothing for me. flew to paris in 2003 and took a xanax. i took one before the flight to know how it would affect me and it made me tired, went to bed and had a lovely, restful night's sleep. apparently, adrenaline coursing thru my body and terror at falling out of the sky at.any.moment, muted its effectiveness as i was still *really* upset and stressed. so on the way home from europe, i took TWO xanax. i still thought i was going to die the entire almost 7 hr flight, i just didn't *care* that i was gonna die.

not sure if you want to dope your son up. ds was really afraid to fly to. i asked my gp if i could give him something and she said nope, gravol and that's it.

 

[Accident]

My daughter struggles with anxiety on everything. I would consult his doctor for their input on how to proceed (and help him get over his phobia).

If you can spare the extra days and don't want to drive, look into amtrak. Cost wise, even with a sleeper it should come out near your flights and the times it arrives and leave you can get most of your arrival and departure day to enjoy the parks but you would need to be able to have 2 more days for the travel time from MD.

 

[kandb]

Tell him logically flying is the safest way to travel. There are car and train accidents also. People roll over in trains sometimes and then get trapped, so that thought is not much better. My son doesn't like heights, so we get him and aisle seat and always fly jetblue which has your own personal tv. Tell him, in life, we can't let a fear control our actions, we have to take control and think logically and not let our emotions rule us. It also depends on the severity of his fear, his he "kinda" scared or in a panic about it? I don't like flying and we have had turbulent flights and I ask myself when was the last time I heard of a plane crash because of turbulence and I can't think of one, so I think of it logically and it helps. Good luck!

 

[texasroni75]

DH and I both get anxious on planes. However, his anxiety is more severe than mine (to the point that he gets violently sick on planes). He takes Dramamine, which I know is supposed to be for motion sickness, but what it does for him is basically makes him sleep deeply for the whole flight. Next best would be allergy meds which also make him sleepy enough that he is more relaxed for the flight.

What I do for myself is just make sure I have things to distract me. With small kids to care for and keep quiet and entertained, that's usually enough. But on the few flights I took without the kiddos, I brought along reading material, lots of snacks and an iPod. I also make sure my window shade is DOWN.

 

[mandy200587]

Me! Though my worst parts are the take off and landing. I stick my earbuds in with music and it helped some but it didn't help me completely. Drove this year but flying next year. I'll be looking for something to help ease the flying anxiety

 

[TeamSy]

I use Ativan and it works great for me! I would definitely talk to your doctor. Tell your son to face his fears and how glad he'll be after he did it - it's a great accomplishment for someone who is so scared

 

[ldymcbth]

Tell him logically flying is the safest way to travel. There are car and train accidents also. People roll over in trains sometimes and then get trapped, so that thought is not much better. My son doesn't like heights, so we get him and aisle seat and always fly jetblue which has your own personal tv. Tell him, in life, we can't let a fear control our actions, we have to take control and think logically and not let our emotions rule us. It also depends on the severity of his fear, his he "kinda" scared or in a panic about it? I don't like flying and we have had turbulent flights and I ask myself when was the last time I heard of a plane crash because of turbulence and I can't think of one, so I think of it logically and it helps. Good luck!

This is good advice - at his age, this is something he needs to try and conquer. I don't know that I would FORCE him to go, but I would talk to him about some of his dreams - does he want to go to Europe one day, or Hawaii, or Japan? You can't drive everywhere! I bet one good, solid flying experience would calm him down quite a bit, especially since he's been a frequent flier up until the rough flights. I would use medication as a LAST resort in this instance, and only after consulting with his doctor.

That said, I have valium for an upcoming flight to Japan - not for nerves about flying, but because I start to feel very hemmed in and uncomfortable, and I'm hoping the valium will help me get some sleep on the flight, etc.

 

[ArwenMarie]

This is good advice - at his age, this is something he needs to try and conquer. I don't know that I would FORCE him to go, but I would talk to him about some of his dreams - does he want to go to Europe one day, or Hawaii, or Japan? You can't drive everywhere! I bet one good, solid flying experience would calm him down quite a bit, especially since he's been a frequent flier up until the rough flights. I would use medication as a LAST resort in this instance, and only after consulting with his doctor.

That said, I have valium for an upcoming flight to Japan - not for nerves about flying, but because I start to feel very hemmed in and uncomfortable, and I'm hoping the valium will help me get some sleep on the flight, etc.

I'm confused. So he should just buck up and get over his fear, but you take Valium to get through a flight? Not that there is anything wrong with that, I am a strong proponent of better living through chemistry, but I'm having a hard time understanding your logic here.

 

[ols386]

I wouldn't force him to fly if he is uncomfortable with it and doesn't want to.

Someone earlier mentioned Dramamine...I think that's a good idea if he would be willing.

I sometimes take 1/2 a pill when flying, and it knocks me out.

 

[Harambe]

My doctor prescribes 4 Xanax for when I fly (2 down and 2 for return trip). Another thing that helps me is looking at the crew on the plane and knowing that every one of them has plans when they are done "working". If they think nothing of it, why am I so worried?!?!

But for a 16YO, I wouldn't force him at all. If you really want to cure him, take him on the train! It is horrible! He'll be begging for that 2 or 3 hour flight, compared to 26 hours of torture on the train! LOL!

 

[hollannc]

I also suggest Ativan. Also as an alternative to that or Dramamine, Phenergan or the generic is an anti nausea med that will also make him a little more relaxed and sleepy.

 

[disnut1149]

I won't fly without Xanax. I take one 20 minutes before boarding and I sleep the whole time, about 2 1/2 hours. I hate flying and it's the only way I'll get on a plane. Maybe that would help your son if he would agree to it.

 

[Canuck16]

I used to love flying all the time when I was younger and then in my 20's I began to hate flying for some strange reason. Then when my kids were old enough to take to DLR we had to drive from Kelowna British Columbia to Disneyland as I refused to fly. Then we decided that we really wanted to visit Walt Disney World so I had to get on a plane in order for that to happen. Our flight was between 5 1/2 - 6 1/2 hours from Seattle to Orlando which is like an eternity when you do not like to fly.

So I decided to give Ativan a try and it worked!!!! It just took the "edge" and I was able to get on that plane without any problem at all and I was able to take my kids to WDW/US and we had a blast!!!

Now we can't wait until we can get back again in 2018 and I am looking forward to getting back on that plane again!!

 

[melana]

Well... first, I would not force him to do it. I have a very, very, bad fear of flying. I have flown before but it is not my cup of tea. I avoid it. My fear of flying comes from my first flight when I was about 10 years old (nearly 28 years ago). My mom scared me to death on the plane and I have had a major phobia ever since. I have flown twice since for work and I have had bad experiences each time. One time our plane had to be diverted because someone passed out, the other, we hit really bad turbulence. Forcing him could cause the fear to become worse and could possibly cause issues with trust between the two of you. But I have known people who take medication and are fine. Most of the time i go along with the face your fear type of thing, I did it when I went on my first cruise and I love taking cruises now. But it has never worked with Flying. My fear is so bad, after a trip to Denver for work, I almost decided to take the train back home. That is a nearly 42 hour train ride, plus a 2 hour car ride.

 

[wdw4rfam]

We all have a fear of flying, so we drive. My oldest DD wants to fly, and doesn't have the extra days to drive, so her and her BF are meeting us there. We had a really bad flight back in 2006, and have drove ever since. I know it's safer to fly then drive, but just can't do it.

 

[kandb]

I think a lot of people aren't fond of flying but most suck it up because driving for almost 20 hours to and from WDW sucks. Yes, it can be a little bit of an adventure, but that's for around an hour. Driving so many miles and hours for the most part sucks, especially when there are children in the car saying "when are we going to get there?"

 

[edk35]

Thanks everyone. He told me yesterday he will go with something to help him relax/sleep. He also said no layovers so he doesn't have to take off/land twice each way. We usually always go direct which is 2 hours.