Tasha+Scott
<font color=red>BL II - Red Team<br><font color=pu
- Joined
- Jun 10, 2004
- Messages
- 4,622
As a wife and a mother, undoubtedly you understand the challenges of having a child. What, in your opinion, is the most challenging aspect of starting a family?
Waiting until you AND your partner are both ready emotionally and financially. It is hard when one of you is ready and the other obviously isn't but it makes things easier if you wait until you both are!
What is the biggest myth about having a baby?
That it is easy from the start. Despite the advertisements, babies aren't always a ball of sunshine. Mine can be quite demanding and irritable when she wants to be. I don't know that this is the biggest myth, just the first that came to mind. I think there are a lot of myths actually.
How important is it to send a child to a private school vs. a public school? Are there any advantages or disadvantages?
I don't know if there are advantages or disadvantages but I went to public school and am a pretty well-adjusted person. My children will also go to public school and we will hope they turn out okay too!
What was the biggest adjustment that had to be made after you had your first child?
Learning that it isn't all about me anymore. Your child has to come first and you end up giving most of yourself to that little person. I can't tell you the number of times that entire days have just flown by and I had done nothing for myself or around the house b/c I was taking care of dd all day long and meeting her demands...um, I mean needs!
What is the best thing about having a baby? The worst?
The unconditional love I have for my dd is indescribable! I have never felt bonded to someone like I do with her! Every smile, giggle, and coo warms my heart and makes me temporarily forget any problems or worries. It is also awesome to see how in love with her my dh is. I have never seen a man so shamelessly wrapped around a baby's finger before! The worst is when they are cranky, irritable, or don't feel well and you have tried everything you know to do with no success. You just want to make them feel better and don't know how!
Should a mother stay at home with her children?
That's a personal decision. I chose to stay home while dd is small but will eventually go back to work. A lot of women don't have that option. It is hard to get by on one income these days. Truthfully we had to make a lot of huge adjustments so I could stay home. There is no right or wrong decision on this one IMO. Whatever makes the mother comfortable and as long as the baby is happy and well taken care of.
When, in your opinion, is the optimal time to have a child?
Age isn't really relevant. It depends when the couple truly knows they are ready. I had dd at 24 and I was more than ready. Dh was 26 and ready. Some people are not ready until their 40s and that's okay too.
What is the best way to raise a child?
There is no best way. It depends on the child, the mother, the environment, etc. What works for one family won't necessarily work for another. (I wish women didn't feel the need to criticize others when they don't do things the same way they did them.)
Finally, if you were given the choice to do it all over again (having a child), would you do it again and if so, what would you change (if anything)?
God, yes! I couldn't imagine my life without her. As a matter of fact I love being a mommy so much that I plan to do it again in a couple years. I wouldn't change anything as I am happy with the way it worked out. Some would argue that I should have finished my degree and had a stable career with more money first. But I am fine with the way we did things. I did not know what I really wanted to do career wise but I knew I wanted to be a mother. I plan to go back to school once my children are in school. I think having a career first would have been harder for me since I would have felt the need to keep working probably. This way I get the best of both worlds...the chance to stay home with my kids and then the chance to pursue a career later. Again, not for everybody but ideal for our family.
Waiting until you AND your partner are both ready emotionally and financially. It is hard when one of you is ready and the other obviously isn't but it makes things easier if you wait until you both are!
What is the biggest myth about having a baby?
That it is easy from the start. Despite the advertisements, babies aren't always a ball of sunshine. Mine can be quite demanding and irritable when she wants to be. I don't know that this is the biggest myth, just the first that came to mind. I think there are a lot of myths actually.
How important is it to send a child to a private school vs. a public school? Are there any advantages or disadvantages?
I don't know if there are advantages or disadvantages but I went to public school and am a pretty well-adjusted person. My children will also go to public school and we will hope they turn out okay too!
What was the biggest adjustment that had to be made after you had your first child?
Learning that it isn't all about me anymore. Your child has to come first and you end up giving most of yourself to that little person. I can't tell you the number of times that entire days have just flown by and I had done nothing for myself or around the house b/c I was taking care of dd all day long and meeting her demands...um, I mean needs!
What is the best thing about having a baby? The worst?
The unconditional love I have for my dd is indescribable! I have never felt bonded to someone like I do with her! Every smile, giggle, and coo warms my heart and makes me temporarily forget any problems or worries. It is also awesome to see how in love with her my dh is. I have never seen a man so shamelessly wrapped around a baby's finger before! The worst is when they are cranky, irritable, or don't feel well and you have tried everything you know to do with no success. You just want to make them feel better and don't know how!
Should a mother stay at home with her children?
That's a personal decision. I chose to stay home while dd is small but will eventually go back to work. A lot of women don't have that option. It is hard to get by on one income these days. Truthfully we had to make a lot of huge adjustments so I could stay home. There is no right or wrong decision on this one IMO. Whatever makes the mother comfortable and as long as the baby is happy and well taken care of.
When, in your opinion, is the optimal time to have a child?
Age isn't really relevant. It depends when the couple truly knows they are ready. I had dd at 24 and I was more than ready. Dh was 26 and ready. Some people are not ready until their 40s and that's okay too.
What is the best way to raise a child?
There is no best way. It depends on the child, the mother, the environment, etc. What works for one family won't necessarily work for another. (I wish women didn't feel the need to criticize others when they don't do things the same way they did them.)
Finally, if you were given the choice to do it all over again (having a child), would you do it again and if so, what would you change (if anything)?
God, yes! I couldn't imagine my life without her. As a matter of fact I love being a mommy so much that I plan to do it again in a couple years. I wouldn't change anything as I am happy with the way it worked out. Some would argue that I should have finished my degree and had a stable career with more money first. But I am fine with the way we did things. I did not know what I really wanted to do career wise but I knew I wanted to be a mother. I plan to go back to school once my children are in school. I think having a career first would have been harder for me since I would have felt the need to keep working probably. This way I get the best of both worlds...the chance to stay home with my kids and then the chance to pursue a career later. Again, not for everybody but ideal for our family.
Trying to be a supermom is the worst. 

I would change that I listened to everyone, and I mean EVERYONE else's advice on what I should do, when, where, why, how.....and listen to my own instinct more. I could have prevented a lot of stress. 
