Americans and Canadians culture Q&A Thread.

[declansdad]

Remembrance Day is a statutory holiday here in New Brunswick and for the life of me I don't understand why it isn't that way in every province. Here there are ceremonies of remembrance, usually at the cenotaph, but sometime communities have moved them indoors and created larger versions.

My wife and I watch the national ceremony from Ottawa every year. Whenever I visit Ottawa I make it a point to visit the National War Memorial and pay my respects.

 

[seshat0120]

In America it a special greeting and when we see a veteran on the day (or any other day really) we say “thank you for your service”. @prairie_girl said it’s disrespectful to say happy but here it’s the norm. I do know there is more than one tomb of the unknown soldier but thought the one in the USA was the most famous.

Perhaps it's your norm and those close to you to say Happy Memorial Day or Happy Veteran's Day, but it's by no means the norm in the US. I've never used those phrases and probably can count on one hand (with fingers left over) the amount of times I've heard someone else use them (and they were generally quickly corrected that neither is a day to be "happy" about.

The Tomb of the Unknowns in Arlington National Cemetery may be the "most famous" to Americans, but it's rather presumptuous to think that it's the most famous worldwide...or oldest. The Tomb of the Unknown Warrior in Westminster Abbey and La Tombe du Soldat Iconnu in the Arc de Triomphe both predate the US Tomb of the Uknowns. I think if you ask any citizen of 60+ countries that have such a memorial, the first one they're going to think of is the one located in their country.

Remembrance Day in Canada is such a somber, heavy, and respectful event. The US's Memorial Day, which would be closest to Canada's Remembrance Day, is held in May to honour military members who have died. However, for some reason, it is literally celebrated by kicking off the summer with barbecues and fireworks. In contrast, I guess it is no wonder that the American's say, "Happy Memorial Day!"

It's been commercialized as a kick off to summer but that's certainly not the only way it's celebrated. The evening before, a concert is held on the grounds of the US Capitol commemorating those who have given the last full measure of devotion in defense of the US. The morning of, there is a wreath laying ceremony by the POTUS at the Tomb of the Unknowns followed by a memorial service in the amphitheater. Cities and towns across the country hold their own services to commemorate and remember those who have been lost.

As odd as it may seem, the cookouts do have a meaning (that's unfortunately been lost). Memorial Day ha precedent in the days following the Civil War where the graves of the dead were decorated (hence, the older name of Decoration Day). After decorating the graves with flowers, the families would then picnic. This has morphed into some of the practices seen today. Although some may have forgotten (or never knew) the reason behind the get togethers, Memorial Day is by no means just seen as a party day.

 

[NAB]

We will have 2 minutes of silence at 11 o’clock today as well .

 

[Buzz Rules]

Perhaps it's your norm and those close to you to say Happy Memorial Day or Happy Veteran's Day, but it's by no means the norm in the US. I've never used those phrases and probably can count on one hand (with fingers left over) the amount of times I've heard someone else use them (and they were generally quickly corrected that neither is a day to be "happy" about.

It’s a common phrase I heard people say in CT, NY, PA, and NJ. TV stations even say Happy Veterans/Memorial Day. It’s not disrespectful, just a cultural thing. And you can feel a sense of pride which can be a happy feeling. There is more than one way to see the day in a positive light.

 

[prairie_girl]

Remembrance Day is a statutory holiday here in New Brunswick and for the life of me I don't understand why it isn't that way in every province. Here there are ceremonies of remembrance, usually at the cenotaph, but sometime communities have moved them indoors and created larger versions.

My wife and I watch the national ceremony from Ottawa every year. Whenever I visit Ottawa I make it a point to visit the National War Memorial and pay my respects.

I agree. It should be a nationwide holiday. Here in MB, it is not a holiday. My husband does not work and will not be paid for today.

Perhaps it's your norm and those close to you to say Happy Memorial Day or Happy Veteran's Day, but it's by no means the norm in the US. I've never used those phrases and probably can count on one hand (with fingers left over) the amount of times I've heard someone else use them (and they were generally quickly corrected that neither is a day to be "happy" about.

The Tomb of the Unknowns in Arlington National Cemetery may be the "most famous" to Americans, but it's rather presumptuous to think that it's the most famous worldwide...or oldest. The Tomb of the Unknown Warrior in Westminster Abbey and La Tombe du Soldat Iconnu in the Arc de Triomphe both predate the US Tomb of the Uknowns. I think if you ask any citizen of 60+ countries that have such a memorial, the first one they're going to think of is the one located in their country.


It's been commercialized as a kick off to summer but that's certainly not the only way it's celebrated. The evening before, a concert is held on the grounds of the US Capitol commemorating those who have given the last full measure of devotion in defense of the US. The morning of, there is a wreath laying ceremony by the POTUS at the Tomb of the Unknowns followed by a memorial service in the amphitheater. Cities and towns across the country hold their own services to commemorate and remember those who have been lost. It is by no means just seen as a party day.

You must be new around these parts lol

*kidding…kind of

 

[ronandannette]

I apologize. I meant no disrespect. What is the proper greeting to say on Remembrance Day? I know it’s less of a celebration in Canada but even on Memorial Day in the USA, the greeting is still happy Memorial Day. I truly respect all countries whose soldiers have fought as allies with ours. I’m just confused on what to say on your version of today. I do hope Canadians could still respond to the question about the tomb of the unknown soldier.

Does this look celebratory to you? Or like anything at all that would evoke "happiness" today? It's a tribute field set up along a prominent Calgary roadway every November. 3,500 hundred markers, each with multiple names, honoring every single known soldier from the southern Alberta region that make the ultimate sacrifice. It's called the Field of Crosses and it's solemn and sacred.


Our local public services will be held at a monument called the Centotaph, in a downtown park called Central Memorial. Most cities and towns have a similar location. (Note: None of these pictures are from today; it is currently -8 and 7" of snow on the ground).


There is also a very touching, nation-wide initiative, now in it's 12th year, called No Stone Left Alone. It is part of the educational curriculum in every province and aims to instill both our history and our values, to young people now and into the future. The abhorrence of war, the necessity to defend liberty both at home and around the world, and the respect for those who have paid the cost.
https://www.nostoneleftalone.ca/about-nsla

 

[Aladora]

Remembrance Day is a statutory holiday here in New Brunswick and for the life of me I don't understand why it isn't that way in every province. Here there are ceremonies of remembrance, usually at the cenotaph, but sometime communities have moved them indoors and created larger versions.

My wife and I watch the national ceremony from Ottawa every year. Whenever I visit Ottawa I make it a point to visit the National War Memorial and pay my respects.

It is a stat here in BC as well. I grew up in Ottawa so remember going to many Remembrance Day assemblies at school.

I live just a few blocks away from a Navy base and there is a cenotaph just a few minutes walk away. I have a very busy day today as DH and I are leaving early tomorrow for a business trip but I will absolutely be taking a moment at 11am to reflect on what this day means to me.

So, every week at our company we have one staff member do what we call "lunch and learn" where they get a chance to make a 30 min presentation on a topic that interests them. (stay with me, I am actually going somewhere with this!) This week we decided to have people talk about Remembrance Day and what it means to them. My husband was one of the people who spoke as he is a Navy Veteran. He spoke about his time in the military and also told a story about what happened to a friend of his who was deployed to Croatia. Now, my husband almost never cries but on Wednesday I watched him on Teams, crying in front of all his staff.

For anyone who is curious about the story he told, you can read about it here His friend is the Master Corporal who was saved.

 

[ronandannette]

And while we're at it, may I respectfully request that all Canadians truly honor those who served by donating to one of these? Let's give real meaning to the words "Thank you for your service".
https://www.legion.ca/support-for-veterans
https://vetscanada.org/english/give-help
https://veteransassociationfoodbank.ca/give-food
https://calgaryherald.com/news/loca...s-food-bank-struggling-to-keep-up-with-demand

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Why do you need to greet people in any special way? You just say 'Hello" or "Good day" or whatever you'd say on any other day.

To be fair to Buzz the ways of saying things to military personnel can vary between them.

My step-father-in-law (from new england area) is retired Navy Chief and has zero issues with anything like that. He himself says thank you for your service and says happy veteran's day as do many of his age (mid-late 60s). In fact many places we go out and he starts chatting it up with other service members discussing what ships they were on (he was stations off of Japan for a while for instance).

My grandfather was a Marine also had no issues.

I also know another Marine with multiple tours in the middle east and he also had no issues with saying happy veteran's day.

It can def. vary and it's hard to say one speaks for all but it's also not as presumptuous as some may think. If anything over the years we've just become more sensitive to varying opinions on the matter.

*sorry hit the post button without a replay hate when I do that

 

[seshat0120]

It’s a common phrase I heard people say in CT, NY, PA, and NJ. TV stations even say Happy Veterans/Memorial Day. It’s not disrespectful, just a cultural thing. And you can feel a sense of pride which can be a happy feeling. There is more than one way to see the day in a positive light.

Again, you reference a small, representative circle and you think that covers all Americans...despite another American telling you that, no, it's not normal, it's not common, and it's not a cultural thing. Perhaps it's best to speak for yourself instead of speaking for all Americans since what may be considered common in one part of the US, is not so common in the rest.

I've never heard a TV station use "happy" to precede either holiday. It's either variants of "Honoring those who served," on Veterans Day and variants of "Honoring those who paid the last full measure of devotion," on Memorial Day.

Frankly, I do find it very disrespectful. Not that I want to play the "personal experience" trump card, but...I had an uncle killed during WWII at Guadalcanal and another that was awarded the Purple Heart more than once (and carried shrapnel from D-day in his body until the day he died). Another uncle took part in the Berlin airlift and another saw action in Korea. My father narrowly escaped being killed in Vietnam. No. I don't see anything "happy" about either Memorial Day or Veteran's Day. I have a great sense of pride for my father and uncles and every other man and woman who puts on the uniform and puts him/herself in harms way, but I will never associate that with being happy.

 

[Buzz Rules]

Does this look celebratory to you? Or like anything at all that would evoke "happiness" today? It's a tribute field set up along a prominent Calgary roadway every November. 3,500 hundred markers, each with multiple names, honoring every single known soldier from the southern Alberta region that make the ultimate sacrifice. It's called the Field of Crosses and it's solemn and sacred.
View attachment 718025View attachment 718027

Our local public services will be held at a monument called the Centotaph, in a downtown park called Central Memorial. Most cities and towns have a similar location. (Note: None of these pictures are from today; it is currently -8 and 7" of snow on the ground).
View attachment 718034

There is also a very touching, nation-wide initiative, now in it's 12th year, called No Stone Left Alone. It is part of the educational curriculum in every province and aims to instill both our history and our values, to young people now and into the future. The abhorrence of war, the necessity to defend liberty both at home and around the world, and the respect for those who have paid the cost.
https://www.nostoneleftalone.ca/about-nsla
View attachment 718036

Memorial Day equals Remembrance Day in America to a point as said before. I understand what you mean as a non happy day. All war is unfortunate. I usually visit the graves of my military ancestors around Memorial Day. I have mixed feelings about the day. It’s sad that war happens but Veterans Day and Remembrance Day are two clearly different holidays that shows some differences between our cultures.

 

[ronandannette]

Memorial Day equals Remembrance Day in America to a point as said before. I understand what you mean as a non happy day. All war is unfortunate. I usually visit the graves of my military ancestors around Memorial Day. I have mixed feelings about the day. It’s sad that war happens but Veterans Day and Remembrance Day are two clearly different holidays that shows some differences between our cultures.

Yes, just so.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

The Tomb of the Unknowns in Arlington National Cemetery

I will say the changing of the guards is one of the most powerful things I have ever witnessed and I am grateful to have seen it twice. Once right after 9/11 (like a month later took on a very different feeling) and the other time in 2016. If you are not respectful in both silence and care of the place they will call you out, they will ensure you understand it is a time to be retrospective.

In 2016 they called out a person sitting on the railing by stepping out of the path and back onto it, other than some chatter from young children it is very silent while the guard is doing their passing and then the during the changing of the guards.

I appreciate you drawing attention to other such places. In my schooling as one discusses history you do learn about Arc de Triomphe although with less in-depth discussion. I had a tad more discussion in french courses over the years.

 

[Buzz Rules]

Again, you reference a small, representative circle and you think that covers all Americans...despite another American telling you that, no, it's not normal, it's not common, and it's not a cultural thing.

Frankly, I do find it very disrespectful. Not that I want to play the "personal experience" trump card, but...I had an uncle killed during WWII at Guadalcanal and another that was awarded the Purple Heart more than once (and carried shrapnel from D-day in his body until the day he died). Another uncle took part in the Berlin airlift and another saw action in Korea. My father narrowly escaped being killed in Vietnam. No. I don't see anything "happy" about either Memorial Day or Veteran's Day. I have a great sense of pride for my father and uncles and every other man and woman who puts on the uniform and puts him/herself in harms way, but I will never associate that with being happy.

I never said every American. But frankly, you seem to always believe what you view is the absolute majority view of the country (yes, I’ve been guilty of that in the past). You have called me essentially in the past an egotistical and arrogant American. You have every right to feel the way you do, as do I. But if I’m that wrong with my so called limited knowledge, why are there many Veterans Day parades where huge portions of the population are saying Happy Veterans Day? You may not say the phrase, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a common thing.

Edit: And yes, I know the phrase isn’t the best and thank you for your service is common as well. My only point is you will hear people say it in many more places than you think. And yes, I know that could just be people tone deaf on the issue.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2022/11/11/what-is-veterans-day/8288067001/

 

[seshat0120]

I never said every American. But frankly, you seem to always believe what you view is the absolute majority view of the country (yes, I’ve been guilty of that in the past). You have called me essentially in the past an egotistical and arrogant American. You have every right to feel the way you do, as do I. But if I’m that wrong with my so called limited knowledge, why are there many Veterans Day parades where huge portions of the population are saying Happy Veterans Day? You may not say the phrase, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a common thing.

No. I don't believe my views and experiences are representative of the majority of country. Frankly, that's why I get irritated when you put forth your views as being so...and you do it quite often. Have you been to every Veteran's Day parade in every part of the country? Have you visited every state? Have you spoken with every American? Unless you can say yes to any/all of those questions, you really don't have enough empirical evidence to make the claim you want. Yes. Your knowledge is limited in this case to just what you've experienced just as my knowledge is limited to just what I've experienced. Based on that, it's fair to say that what is common in one part of the country is by no means common in another so neither of us can really make any claims about what's common for the entire country.

And I'm sorry but sometimes you do personify the stereotypical "arrogant American" with statements you make. You did so earlier when you claimed the US Tomb of the Unknowns is the most famous. It's as if it never occurred to you that other countries may, frankly, not care what the US has or does not have and do not consider the US the center of the universe.

 

[SirDuff]

To be fair to Buzz the ways of saying things to military personnel can vary between them.

My step-father-in-law (from new england area) is retired Navy Chief and has zero issues with anything like that. He himself says thank you for your service and says happy veteran's day as do many of his age (mid-late 60s). In fact many places we go out and he starts chatting it up with other service members discussing what ships they were on (he was stations off of Japan for a while for instance).

My grandfather was a Marine also had no issues.

I also know another Marine with multiple tours in the middle east and he also had no issues with saying happy veteran's day.

It can def. vary and it's hard to say one speaks for all but it's also not as presumptuous as some may think. If anything over the years we've just become more sensitive to varying opinions on the matter.

*sorry hit the post button without a replay hate when I do that

None of which has ANYTHING to do with my comment, but interesting for you, I guess.

The conversation was about general greetings "of the day", not "ways of saying things to military personnel". It was in direct response to Buzz wishing people here (mainly/entirely not military personal) a "Happy Remembrance Day".

 

[Buzz Rules]

No. I don't believe my views and experiences are representative of the majority of country. Frankly, that's why I get irritated when you put forth your views as being so...and you do it quite often. Have you been to every Veteran's Day parade in every part of the country? Have you visited every state? Have you spoken with every American? Unless you can say yes to any/all of those questions, you really don't have enough empirical evidence to make the claim you want. Yes. Your knowledge is limited in this case to just what you've experienced just as my knowledge is limited to just what I've experienced. Based on that, it's fair to say that what is common in one part of the country is by no means common in another so neither of us can really make any claims about what's common for the entire country.

And I'm sorry but sometimes you do personify the stereotypical "arrogant American" with statements you make. You did so earlier when you claimed the US Tomb of the Unknowns is the most famous. It's as if it never occurred to you that other countries may, frankly, not care what the US has or does not have and do not consider the US the center of the universe.

I never said all Americans but having heard the phrase in four states did make it seem to be just another common American thing. I have heard people say thank you for your service just as much to be honest. Would you say most Americans are ignorant and arrogant? If you ask majority of Americans if they know about the other tomb memorials, how many would honestly say yes (not a dig at you, just making a point). I fully admit when I’m wrong but I also follow more news and current events from around the world than the average person does. I said I believe the T.U.S. is the most famous (yes partly because it’s American and more eyes probably see it than the ones in other less visited countries). I don’t believe we are the center of the world. But I do think we hold the most influence as did the British before. We are on top of the world order and that gets challenged often. And an unfortunate side affect of that is some arrogance that is naturally imbedded in our culture (right or wrong).

 

[SirDuff]

I never said all Americans but having heard the phrase in four states did make it seem to be just another common American thing. I have heard people say thank you for your service just as much to be honest. Would you say most Americans are ignorant and arrogant? If you ask majority of Americans if they know about the other tomb memorials, how many would honestly say yes (not a dig at you, just making a point). I fully admit when I’m wrong but I also follow more news and current events from around the world than the average person does. I said I believe the T.U.S. is the most famous (yes partly because it’s American and more eyes probably see it than the ones in other less visited countries). I don’t believe we are the center of the world. But I do think we hold the most influence as did the British before. We are on top of the world order and that gets challenged often. And an unfortunate side affect of that is some arrogance that is naturally imbedded in our culture (right or wrong).

Since Arc de Triomphe was given as a specific example, I'll point out that France gets far more tourists than the US (https://www.worlddata.info/tourism.php).

 

[Buzz Rules]

Since Arc de Triomphe was given as a specific example, I'll point out that France gets far more tourists than the US (https://www.worlddata.info/tourism.php).

View attachment 718044

I stand corrected.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

None of which has ANYTHING to do with my comment, but interesting for you, I guess.

The conversation was about general greetings "of the day", not "ways of saying things to military personnel". It was in direct response to Buzz wishing people here (mainly/entirely not military personal) a "Happy Remembrance Day".

I get what the conversation was about. The riff started with the saying of Happy Veteran's Day on the particular and comments surrounding saying that vs not saying that, when Buzz asked what do you say for Remembrance Day which related to the discussion and you responded with asking why do you need to say anything, just treat it like any other normal day. My response was just in a sort of defense about the Veteran's Day talk because you specifically asked why do you need to greet anyone in a special way (and yes I know you were talking about Remembrance Day) . You don't have to, there just are people who do it themselves for Veteran's Day thus I suppose perpetuating the greeting making it normal I suppose to assume others have greetings to for other such days. When that is an incorrect assumption it's nice to learn about it with less hostility I suppose. I'm always about learning new things personally

Sorry I bothered to respond at all