Well we are back and now that I can focus on something else my attention has turned to my house which looks like a dump at the moment. It really just needs to be straightened, dusted, and vaccumed but yet it all feels very overwhelming at the moment.
The service was nice although to me, not very personal. My Dad came to the funeral which in my opinion just made things harder on me. My parents have been divorced for 3 years but my Dad was never really happy about it. And I know in moments like these he is hoping that my Mom will turn to him for comfort - when she doesn't he gets angry and says things to me that really bother me. I love my Dad but in a way he is very selfish and instead of being their to support her or his children he is really there looking for an oppurtunity. And I feel bad that he is still hurting so much and I try to make him understand without really placing blame - but the truth is that my Mom was worried about herself and her sister's family and not thinking about my Dad. It is very distressing and I never know what to say. I'm thinking later I'll take a long bath to relieve all the tension.
I know this has nothing to do with dieting - but I need to get all of this out so that I don't binge. I have remained on plan today.
B: 1 piece of ham, egg, and slice of cheese - 3 carbs
L: 4 chicken wings, 3 slices of ham with Cheese, broccoli and celery dipped in veggie dip. I estimate 7.5 carbs for lunch.
S: toppings off of 4 slices of thin crust pizza
D: We are going to grill bratwurst - I will be enjoying mine without a bun and I will be having some grilled mushrooms with it.
~Amanda