please forgive me for posting here. I know that what I am about to say pales in comparasen to what some of you have shared. But, I had no where else to turn to......
ever since 911, ever since we had to sell the first "real" house that I've ever lived in, ever since my husband lost his job, ever since B got diagnosed with breast cancer, ever since I lost my job, ever since our bills started to pile up, ever since I was almost diagnosed with MS, I have been living in a state of not even fear, but being completely petrified. I hide it well during the day when I am distracted by things, but as soon as I wake up at night-for any reason I can't stop the overwhelming sense of dread and it takes me hours to go back to sleep. Going to the Dr. tomorrow b/c getting lots of weird pains and symptoms- I'm useless at coping and imagining the worst. I always feel like the worst is yet to happen god forbid. I try to have a positive attitude, but sometimes it's just too hard to do. Thanks for giving me a space to share my thoughts. Hopefully I'll wake up on the right side of the bed........
ever since 911, ever since we had to sell the first "real" house that I've ever lived in, ever since my husband lost his job, ever since B got diagnosed with breast cancer, ever since I lost my job, ever since our bills started to pile up, ever since I was almost diagnosed with MS, I have been living in a state of not even fear, but being completely petrified. I hide it well during the day when I am distracted by things, but as soon as I wake up at night-for any reason I can't stop the overwhelming sense of dread and it takes me hours to go back to sleep. Going to the Dr. tomorrow b/c getting lots of weird pains and symptoms- I'm useless at coping and imagining the worst. I always feel like the worst is yet to happen god forbid. I try to have a positive attitude, but sometimes it's just too hard to do. Thanks for giving me a space to share my thoughts. Hopefully I'll wake up on the right side of the bed........