Thank you all again. I really appreciate your honesty and support.
Well I got home tonight and he wanted to go to the store so I took him. He made a couple of comments about things being "gay", I asked him why he kept saying that. He said because it is. I said saying that is as bad as someone calling him the N word. He said it was "tranny", I went on to say that being a tranny or gay isn't someone's fault. It isn't a choice they make it just is. He didn't say anything. I asked him if he knew anyone that was gay, he said no. I said well being gay doesn't make them a bad person. I told him the story that I had come up with (that I just read someone disagreed with me doing-wish I read that BEFORE) but anyway I told him that a lady I work with recently had her son come to her and say he was gay. I said that it was really hard for him and that she told me alot of the things he was going through (trouble at school, keeping to himself, not feeling like he belonged etc.) I said it kind of reminded me of things that you are going through and that I wanted him to know that I was here if he needed to talk. I told him that I am not suggesting or expecting him to answer but that I understand and I am here. I said that it was a good thing the kid came out because he got hooked up with a support group that really helped him understand it. I asked him if he understood what I was saying, he said he did. So we left it at that. He got silly chatty after that which is kind of unusual for him and now he is watching TV on my bed which is very unusual. How did I do?
Oh and in answer to your question, no he does not know my lesbian friends. It honestly doesn't matter to me if he has a girlfriend or a boyfriend. I will admit it will take some getting used to, but he is an awesome kid who deserves the best whatever that may be. And ultimately, it is his happiness and well being that I am concerned with. He has done a 180 in the last few years going from a happy outgoing kid to a quiet withdrawn teenager. If he jumped on the roof and screamed he was gay and happy, I would be thrilled because he was happy.
I also want to say that I am sorry for all of you that didn't have a support system. It must have been difficult. When my husband and I got married (he is black and I am white) we encountered alot of prejudice (still do at times) even from my family members. I swore I would always love my kids unconditionally and I do. I have told them that since they were little. I told them that noone will ever love them or look out for their best interests like I would and that I will help them through whatever comes their way.I did add that it didn't mean I wouldn't be mad or that they wouldn't get into trouble which in hindsight I shouldn't have. They don't give out parenting manuals sadly.
It sounds to me like he got the message -- that you love him and support him, even if he's not ready to talk about it. It's not just something that you and your husband will have to "get used to," your son also needs to wrap his mind around this. We live in a society that expects everyone to be heterosexual. When one of us discovers that we don't fit the mold, we're kind of like
Regardless of what we're feeling inside and even if we're attracted to someone of the same sex, there's a part of us that simply has to adjust to the idea that we're "different." Different in a good way, imo 
but still something kind of unexpected even to ourselves.I hope I'm making sense. This has been my experience and the experience of others of my acquaintance.
Regardless of where your son is in the process of self-discovery, I think you got your point across loud and clear. And it seems like his behavior supports that as well -- silly and affectionate. You're doing a great job.
let him know it's ok and you love him by far the best way to go about it
