Absolutely sick over a $150.00 flower girl dress

[ameraumi]

That is a GORGEOUS dress!!!

I hope it is just as gorgeous in person! I should have it by next weekend to get altered.

I never in a million years would have asked my attendants to pay for their dresses. My first marriage I had 3 and 2 flower girls and we paid for everything. Even the 2nd time around we paid for the BM/MOH formal wear. I guess times have changed.

 

[Mad4Dizne]

[When we got married I was able to rent the dresses and tuxes from a local shop. The flower girl dresses looked like princesses and noone had to spend and arm and a leg for something they wouldn't wear again.]

Since it was an after thought, you may want to consider trying to decline..

Good Luck with this situation......

 

[ChristyJ]

Thanks...

For our wedding, my bridesmaids wore winter formal dresses that we bought on sale at Macy's for $40. each. I had a "junior" bridesmaid rather than a flower girl and we had her dress made-I think it cost around $50.

I sucked it up and called the bridal boutique to do the measurements over the phone. In the misdt of all of this, my step-father was rushed to the hospital with 104 degree fever, and symptoms of internal bleeding. Turns out he has pneumona in his right lower lung, does have internal bleeding (although they don't know WHERE it's coming from yet)-he's having a blood transfusion because his hemoglobin levels are HALF of what they should be-he's having a colonoscopy tomorrow. Did I mention he has diabetes on top of everything else and doesn't take good care of himself?!

So with all of this, I said the he** with it...

 

[ilovejack02]

Thanks...

For our wedding, my bridesmaids wore winter formal dresses that we bought on sale at Macy's for $40. each. I had a "junior" bridesmaid rather than a flower girl and we had her dress made-I think it cost around $50.

I sucked it up and called the bridal boutique to do the measurements over the phone. In the misdt of all of this, my step-father was rushed to the hospital with 104 degree fever, and symptoms of internal bleeding. Turns out he has pneumona in his right lower lung, does have internal bleeding (although they don't know WHERE it's coming from yet)-he's having a blood transfusion because his hemoglobin levels are HALF of what they should be-he's having a colonoscopy tomorrow. Did I mention he has diabetes on top of everything else and doesn't take good care of himself?!

So with all of this, I said the he** with it...

Hope stepdad gets better asap!!! I know its alot of money and id be upset too. But in the end your daughter will be beautiful and she will be SOOO PROUD and happy to be in the wedding. That should help some LOL.

 

[Mono~rail]

Sorry you are dealing with so much, OP.

I had never heard of attendants paying for their tuxes and outfits until one of my cousins got married in 1999. Our common friends who were in the bridal party were complaining about the cost of the dresses and the shoes she expected them to buy.

When my oldest sister and I got married (separate weddings) in 1992 (my 1st marriage), our parents paid for everyone's dress and tux rentals. I was my best friends matron of honor years ago ('93 or '94), and she did the same for her wedding. DD13 was in a flower girl in a wedding when she was small, and we weren't asked to pay for her dress.

When Dh and I were married, we eloped to Vegas! I'd do it all again today the same way we did it then!

 

[sammielynn]

I think $150 is all relative. $150 to one person may not seem like much but to others it is a great deal. If you cannot afford the dress don't buy it. The bride will just have to understand or get over it. I always hate being the poor one in the family. I would make sure everyone knew why I didn't buy the dress if I chose not to.
I have boys so the price of a child's dress to me is a mystery.

 

[ceroarty]

My 4 year old daughter had to wear a $200 dress that I had to buy. To top it of the wedding was at Christmas time. I feel your pain.

 

[PoohPrincess76]

I just got married in July and my own daughter was the only child in the wedding. I got her dress AND shoes at Sears for $60. I just bought a white 1st communion dress. I couldn't see spending that much on a dress she will only wear one time.

If you feel you need to have your daughter be in the wedding, I would suggest selling the dress on E-Bay after the wedding. At least you could recoup a little of your money.

 

[Lisa_Belle]

I have boys so the price of a child's dress to me is a mystery.

Sammie Lynn, I have a girl and the price of a dress is also a mystery to ME.

To the OP: I would politely decline and if she asks, I would tell the truth. You are a much bigger person than I, obviously.

 

[Stepharoonie!]

EBAY!!

We bought my dd's flowergirl dress on eBay for $20...

We turned the head piece into this:

...and added some color to her dress..it was a nice red bow! LESS than $30 in total!

 

[Lizzy2]

I think the FG dresses for my wedding were $60 and we paid if they could not- It is completely within the boundaries of Emily Post to expect that the bridal party pays for their own attire but it is also a major rule that you accept regrets graciously if someone cannot afford to participate and that you try not make your event a major $ investment.
When will these brides get over this "I'm a Princess!" deal?
I have organized a few weddings for friends and distant relations as a way to help them cut costs. The first thing I discuss with the bride is that I will not be a part of that attitude.Yes, this is a big, big day for you but amazingly enough it is not all about you. Its about your parents and his parents and the other people who love you, too. You are not allowed to throw hissy fits and insist on $500 outfits so that you can be a "Princess". The wedding day is one day- the loving way you treat people on that day will last forever in their hearts and minds.

 

[kribit]

My mom made my flower girl's dress and it looked nicer than any of the dresses in the bridal shoppe. It's such a hard decision to accept the invitation to be in a wedding (even for the little ones). Within a 3 year span, DH and I were in 4 weddings and it must have run us over $1000 per. From what I hear weddings have gotten completely out of control (we've been married for 10 years). I was watching Bridezillas over the weekend and one wedding had a $140K budget...and I honestly didn't think it was all that great.

Is there any way to back out?

 

[chipscinderelly]

As somone who is getting married in 7 weeks this thread is quite amusing.

Here's my take to everyone who thinks that paying for your own child's outfit is wrong: If you don't want to pay for the dress then be honest and tell them no. The bride is not being a bridezilla at all from what I have read (although it's tacky she forgets birthdays and that she asked the daughter first before the parent). $150 for a flower girl dress is not that much today - anything with the word wedding associated is expensive. In some parts of the country it is completely known that the bridal party pays for their own attire - if that does not work for your budget please, just say no, it will be easier on the couple than dealing with the complaints (and yes, even if you do not verbalize them people know you are not happy).

Being a flower girl is something that is honored in our family and my best friends little girls are excited! Oh and by the way, I tried to pay for their dresses and their mommy would not let me.

 

[plummer925]

Uggh. My eyes are about popping out of my head at this thread!

Our wedding was 13 years ago - I married my DH after I graduated high school. I asked mom and dad for my wedding dress ($650) for a graduation present. DH rented his tux, and his best man and groomsmen rented their own ($50 each). My maid of honor and bridesmaid bought used dresses from my DH's sisters wedding party (same color and sizes!) for $75 each - both wore white shoes.

My flowergirl wore a $30 JC Penny dress.

My family chipped in with making goodies to eat. An aunt made us our cake as a wedding gift. Grandpa paid for the limo as our gift. All in all our wedding cost less than $2000 for EVERYTHING.

I could not IMAGINE a $150 dress for a flower girl....or worse, a $500 mandatory "buy in" for the wedding party!?!? My bridal shower was at a local buffet - everyone paid for themselves (abt $10) and we stayed all afternoon - it was great.

Wow. I'm blown away...

 

[Mandy_in_NC]

Mandy,
My DN is getting married and is looking for a flower girl dress. How long did it take to get the dresses & were they good quality? I emailed her mom a link to the site. She's very interested. Thanks for the heads up!
Lisa (also in NC)

We got them in about a week after they were ordered. They are very good quality. I will try to post pictures on here if I can figure out how after the wedding. also the number for the dresses is Style #: A8002a if you want to look at them. Also they look even better in person.

 

[ybcart7]

DD7 has been in 2 weddings -- 1st one after all was said & done (alterations, socks, shoes, hair, etc) it cost us about $250. She wore the beautiful dress one other time in our church nativity scene - she was an angel!!

This summer - myself, DH & DD7 were all in my wonderful nieces wedding -- after all the dresses, alterations, bra's, showers, presents etc were done - it was about $2000. So I would say take lots of pictures of your beautiful little girl having a blast with some very expensive dressup clothes!!!

 

[marthachick]

We got them in about a week after they were ordered. They are very good quality. I will try to post pictures on here if I can figure out how after the wedding. also the number for the dresses is Style #: A8002a if you want to look at them. Also they look even better in person.

Cool! Thanks for the info!!! DSis is really interested in this site for her daughter! The bride, Megan, saw a FG dress for about $125 & I told her that was way too much for a FG dress & it's not even my child who will be the FG!

 

[In a hurry]

You only get to be a princess so many times in life...

I know it is a lot, but you won't have to pay that much again until you hit the teens!

 

[KirstenB]

My brother and sil asked dd who was 6 at the time to be the flower girl for their wedding. Long story, but my brother and sil's 3 year old son was the ring bearer. Anyway, they wanted a formal wedding, etc. I got the feeling that sil wanted dd to go to a bridal shop and get her gown there.

I worked in the Bridal Dept at Leggett's many years ago, so I knew we were looking at $150-200, easily, especially with a crinoline, headpiece, etc. So I asked sil to let me know where she was getting her gown so I could look at it. They lived in Florida, and we live in Virginia. I went to David's Bridal to see sil's gown. Having worked in Bridal, I knew I could find a dead ringer for her gown for less. Sure enough, Dillard's had first communion gowns for $70, and I would defy anyone to show me the difference.

OP, does SIL live in your town? How much time do you have? I'd look at her gown, and see if you couldn't find a match for it somewhere. Unless she lives in the same town, she'll have no idea where you bought the gown. Look on Ebay too. Good luck!

 

[crisi]

I think $150 is all relative. $150 to one person may not seem like much but to others it is a great deal. If you cannot afford the dress don't buy it. The bride will just have to understand or get over it. I always hate being the poor one in the family. I would make sure everyone knew why I didn't buy the dress if I chose not to.
I have boys so the price of a child's dress to me is a mystery.

I agree. I always find it a little shocking how quickly someone can spend someone else's money and declare the expense "reasonable" without knowing what their household budget is like.