A little advice to all the Yankees looking to move down south!

[ChristmasElf]

I here stuff like that all the time, well this is better in NY, that wouldn't happen in NY, well in NY we don't do that. I don't get it, if you think it's so much better in NY move back!

And take everyone from West Palm Beach and South with you!!!

 

[Buckalew11]

Oh my gosh. We had a friend that lived in the mountains of rural TN and he said the same thing! I thought he was kidding! Oh my......



Thank you, and bless your heart (the NORTHERN definition!)

No, he wasn't kidding. Every word is true. if they accept you, you were welcomed and loved like you were indeed there cousins but if they were suspicious or disliked you--better watch your back.

It is very different nowadays.

 

[Buckalew11]

Buckalew: you must be up near Erwin or Gray...!

Actually, this was one hour east of Knoxville. And a tourist town to boot. They'd let you visit, just watch out if you moved in and they didn't like you.

Well, they'd let you visit unless you were African-American. Then you were not welcomed. My parents used to have to practically hide any black guests at our motel! We could NOT allow them to go out to eat. It just wasn't safe--for them or us! So, my parents would get a to-go order for them.

I still wonder what they'd do up there if anyone who was African American wanted to move in. They are absolutely welcomed to visit nowadays, I know that!!

 

[NewJersey]

One of the funniest things I see when I meet a mid-westerner or Southern transplant in the NJ/NYC area for work is how sloooooooow they are (not smart wise, I mean they are just SLOW). They don't realize we are all hustle and bustle up here. We are always on the go! A person I work with from TN was so funny when she first started. She would ask me "Are ya'll this fast all the time?"

"Bless your heart"

 

[Buckalew11]

People in the South are kinder. That is just the way it is, there is a "family" type feel, if you will, in the South.

My other comment is that sometimes it IS hard to fit in down here. Sometimes people have such extended families they don't "need" to make friends with others, so they don't. It all depends on who you meet and how friendly and hospitable they are. My family was lucky, even in a very small community where you do NOT say anything bad about anyone because, trust, me, they are ALL related somehow! People treated us like family. Holidays, cookouts, church, you name it...they were just honestly nice to us.

 

[lulu71]

Heehee! This is a very interesting thread to me, as someone that lives in the South, but not in a "southern" city. You don't know how many times I've heard that New Orleans is not "Southern" and I think I agree. I really can't identify much with all the stereotypical southern things. We don't have southern accents here (more Brooklyn or Boston, I guess) and the only things I can think of that we have here that are stereotypically southern would be grits (don't eat them), sweet tea (don't drink it) and ya'll (OK, I say this alot).

 

[eclectics]

One of the funniest things I see when I meet a mid-westerner or Southern transplant in the NJ/NYC area for work is how sloooooooow they are (not smart wise, I mean they are just SLOW). They don't realize we are all hustle and bustle up here. We are always on the go! A person I work with from TN was so funny when she first started. She would ask me "Are ya'll this fast all the time?"

"Bless your heart"

I still remember the time we sub-contracted some inspection work to a local contractor in Birmingham, AL. The owner was aghast when I asked her to finish two inspections for me in one day. She exclaimed "one of the jobs is clear across town". I replied "Well if my guys can go from one end of NYC to the other in one day she can certainly manage to do it on her end". Her words to me were "Well, ya'll just don't know how BIG Birminham is"! I never did get her to do the rush job. My client had to wait...

 

[darlak]

I think the whole "Bless Your Heart" attitude is what makes folks think Southerners are kinder than the rest of the nation's regions When infact, they have just perfected making a fool out of you, to your face, without you even knowing Brilliant.

Up North, there are no Bless Your Heart's or fake smiles. When you are being insulted, you know it!

I can't really say if Northerners realize when we've insulted them and then followed it with a Bless Your Heart. However, I can assure you that when one Southern woman insults another Southern woman, we do know it. The Bless Your Heart just makes us appear a bit more civilized, or so our grandmothers taught us anyway.

 

[darlak]

I still remember the time we sub-contracted some inspection work to a local contractor in Birmingham, AL. The owner was aghast when I asked her to finish two inspections for me in one day. She exclaimed "one of the jobs is clear across town". I replied "Well if my guys can go from one end of NYC to the other in one day she can certainly manage to do it on her end". Her words to me were "Well, ya'll just don't know how BIG Birminham is"! I never did get her to do the rush job. My client had to wait...

I don't know how long the inspection would have taken, but I can drive from one end of Jefferson County (where Birmingham is located) to the other end in roughly 1 1/2 hours. I live at one end of the county and often travel to the other in a workday, with several stops in between. I think your contact person may have just been lazy. Northern states certainly don't have the monopoly on those. I once asked a client how many children her neighbor had and she replied "Let me see, she gets 4 (pronounced fo here) checks. She must have 4 (remember...fo) kids."

 

[tiggersmom2]

When this Southerner says - "bless your heart" I really mean it...and there is no meaness behind it. I visited NY, NJ and PA as an 18 year old and was SHOCKED. I went into a dry cleaners in PA and asked for directions to a martial arts store and they told me they weren't a damn map or directory assistance. I went into a few other shops around there and they were very curt and rude. I was very disheartened and it did color my opinion for awhile.

However, I have met many wonderful Northern posters here....maybe those folks were just having a bad day.

 

[Hixski]

As a Detriot Tiger fan, I will politely say that I hope not.

Sorry about last year.

One of the funniest things I see when I meet a mid-westerner or Southern transplant in the NJ/NYC area for work is how sloooooooow they are (not smart wise, I mean they are just SLOW). They don't realize we are all hustle and bustle up here. We are always on the go! A person I work with from TN was so funny when she first started. She would ask me "Are ya'll this fast all the time?"

"Bless your heart"

I am from the great state of Missouri. I would agree with you about midwesterners except for the metro St. Louis area. And I would expect Kansas City also. Trust me when I say everyone is in a hurry around here. Now if you get around Lake of the Ozarks where my MIL is......watch out now we are talking slooooooow.

 

[MissMinnie]

Well, as a New Jersey native I take issue with a lot of what you southern folk are saying. The people I know from the northeast would give you their last shirt off their back if you needed it. Growing up in NJ was wonderful with a great sense of family and community. Definitely don't always get that vibe from my southern neighbors, although I have met many wonderful people here in Virginia. It works both ways in the manners department. I worked with a lady many years ago in NJ and she was always going on and on about how wonderful the south is. She was from Charleston SC. Every day we had to hear about how "we would never do that down in Charleston" or the south is so wonderful and does things better, blah, blah, blah. It finally got so bad my supervisor told her to clam it.

At least when I was in the northeast, you knew when people were being polite and when they weren't. Personally, I could care less where you're from. I like to give people a chance and take them as I find them, southern or not.

Please explain to me that some people will not talk to you when they find out "you're not from around here, are you?" Never experienced that in my life
until I moved to VA.

 

[eclectics]

I don't know how long the inspection would have taken, but I can drive from one end of Jefferson County (where Birmingham is located) to the other end in roughly 1 1/2 hours. I live at one end of the county and often travel to the other in a workday, with several stops in between. I think your contact person may have just been lazy. Northern states certainly don't have the monopoly on those. I once asked a client how many children her neighbor had and she replied "Let me see, she gets 4 (pronounced fo here) checks. She must have 4 (remember...fo) kids."

If I recall, they were both in the city proper. I always remember it though as it was my first experience with the "relaxed" working atmosphere of the south. When you are used to doing things at a certain pace, it's hard to adjust! Of course I'm older and wiser now and have adopted a more "relaxed" attitude in general, even though I'm still a Yankee.

 

[Tikicampers]

When this Southerner says - "bless your heart" I really mean it...and there is no meaness behind it.

For most people I know, myself included, if someone says, "Oh you poor thing, bless your heart." in response to something someone says, it is genuine. It's only when it goes with a comment made by the person saying it that's it's an insult. For example, "Bless her heart, she's just not very bright."

BTW, I visited NYC for a few hours one night. I found most people to be very polite, especially the police officers. I did notice that people were less apt to start conversations with people they don't know. In my area, people will strike up a conversation with anyone.

Also, in most areas of the south, people accept outsiders pretty well. In my experience it's only in the small tight knit communities that people are shunned.

 

[daisax]

Nobody has mentioned that the most dyed in the wool deep South American is also going to be called a Yankee overseas!

I don't think the opposite of "Yankee" is "Southerner" or "Redneck" -- I think it's "Reb." But of course that's more offensive than Yankee.

I don't think most Northern people find it derogatory in the sense of "fighting words." If it's meant good naturedly, it's taken that way. If it's included within a criticism, I think it adds another layer of intentional insult.

 

[Tikicampers]

Nobody has mentioned that the most dyed in the wool deep South American is also going to be called a Yankee overseas!

I don't think the opposite of "Yankee" is "Southerner" or "Redneck" -- I think it's "Reb." But of course that's more offensive than Yankee.

I don't think most Northern people find it derogatory in the sense of "fighting words." If it's meant good naturedly, it's taken that way. If it's included within a criticism, I think it adds another layer of intentional insult.

This makes a lot of sense.