$500 for a class ring????

[OK!]

My parents bought me a class ring, I think when I was a sophomore. We were lucky in that our school didn't exercise any control over design, metal, whatever, and I had a lot of fun designing mine. I went with a 10K traditional design with a faux ruby instead of a garnet, my birthstone, because it has a tendency to look black in some settings. On one side was the school mascot (a Lancer) and on the other, a swimmer, as I was on the team for 4 years. I loved that ring and can't find it now to save my life.

I've decided I'll probably get a nontraditional sort of ring for when I graduate college, but obviously I'll pay for it myself. I've worked too damn hard and have suffered through being the oldest one by MANY years in a lot of my classes ; I'll deserve a reward, darn it!

 

[OK!]

OK, and can I just say--Josten's offers fantasy sports rings?! Good Lord.

 

[christineann]

Neither one of my children was interested in a high school ring. They didn't see much point in spending a lot of money on a ring that they would not wear more than a couple of years. Each plans to wear a college ring on one hand and a wedding ring on the other someday. So far we have bought one college ring, and he wears it proudly.

 

[mickeylove2]

I graduated in 2000 and my parents spent $420 on my class ring. We went to a local jewelry store and had mine crafted, it's white gold, and has all the typical class ring "stuff" on it, the sports I played the mascot, my name etc...and it also has 4 small diamonds on the sides of my birth stone. I still have it and if my fingers weren't so stinking fat I would still wear it because it's gorgeous! I wouldn't in a million years have bought mine from Jostens, they just looked cheap when I was in school, maybe they have changed because I don't know anyone that got one from there and spent more that $250.

 

[disykat]

See, if my parents said to me that they'd reduce financial support if I "had a larger entertainment budget" or bought expensive items, that would simply encourage me to stop earning my own money. Why earn extra for the luxuries in life if your basics are going to be reduced as a result?

My parents simply told me: "This is what you need to pay each month: $80 in car insurance, $30 for your cell phone and you need to put $200 a month toward college." Now, if I'd wanted I could have not taken any extra shifts and made my $350 a month which would have simply left me with $40 a month for lunches. If my parents were going to start demanding rent for me if I worked any more hours to earn more money, then I wouldn't have done it? Why would I work harder for no benefit? But instead, I took on more hours so that most of the time I was earning $500 a month and in the vacations I was earning $2,000 a month. MOST of this went towards college, but I also got a few nice purchases such as my shoes, the occasional CD, a vacation and good nights out.

It's like your boss saying to you, "If you do overtime, I'm reducing your hourly pay because we can only afford to pay you $X per week." Why would anyone do overtime for no reason?

Having the opportunity to earn more meant a) I was used to dealing with large sums of money before college and b) I got more work experience. When I went to college, my parents helped me out to the extent they could afford, which covered the basics beyond my student loan. If I wanted to go out partying, I had to earn that money. If I wanted to go away at spring break, I had to earn that money. New clothes, books etc. same deal. I DID go out and earn money, and the amount they gave me never changed. But if they'd said to me "if you earn money, we'll take away what we currently give you", why would I haul my butt into town at 7am 3 days a week to work an 8-hour shift in a shop for $10 an hour?

Now it's different if you're in a financial situation where you can only afford to give Johnny $100 a month at college: then he HAS to go and earn money to pay for the basics. But my parents said to me, "Kath2003, we are going to give you enough to get by. Not to go partying, but enough to put food on the table." The difference between my situation and yours is that you seem to be adding, "But if you choose to earn more money, we'll take the existing support away".

I guess I trusted that my parents were financially responsible enough to give me only what they could afford. If that had been nothing (and it has been at times), then so be it. It just means I work harder to continue with the lifestyle I enjoy.

If you want me to say your way is better, it won't be happening. I have been very polite about your way and you keep badgering me that my way is wrong. As I've said, your parents taught you well in a way that was appropriate for their income and lifestyle. I will teach my children in a way that is appropriate for ours. In my world, parents work hard to send their kids to school and expect those years to be ones of some sacrifice for everyone - and that means not a lot of discretionary income. I don't know why that is hard for you to understand?

Years I made more money, I paid for more of my college. I WANTED to do that because I was aware of the gift my parents were giving me and that they were sacrificing to do so.

 

[Tuffcookie]

Yea!!! I spoke to DS today, after I got home from work. He had no idea they were that much. He is not that into getting one so we are going to pass on this.

I may take him to WallMart, as was suggested, to look at them there.

Thanks, everyone!

TC

 

[MrsPete]

See, if my parents said to me that they'd reduce financial support if I "had a larger entertainment budget" or bought expensive items, that would simply encourage me to stop earning my own money. Why earn extra for the luxuries in life if your basics are going to be reduced as a result?

I'll take a stab at this question, though I don't think it's going to change your mind:

I've scrimped and saved so that my children can attend college. I have enough for them to have their tuition and fees, room and board, and books paid. I've done this for two reasons: 1) I want them to be able to graduate from college debt-free, and 2) I want them to be able to work just a few hours each week (say, 10-15) for pocket money so that they can devote the majority of their time to being college students (which means better grades and graduating on time).

If they choose to work more and more hours at a part-time job so that they have larger "entertainment budgets", it flies in the face of what I've worked for all these years. If they can go to class and work lots of hours, why'd I sacrafice all that time to save?

When they're in college, my expectation is that they will work full-time (even over time) during the summer months, and I will encourage them to stash that money so they have some reserves for the school year -- that'll allow them to take an occasional weekend trip to the beach or buy a nice outfit for a special occasion. By starting the school year with a little in savings, working just a few hours a week will give them plenty of spending money.

 

[MrsPete]

Youngest DS, who is a sophmore and STILL growing , brought home information for class rings Friday.
I was tied up with getting the new computer up and running so I just now opened the envelope to read the information.
The rings are, on an average, $500!
I don't think I want to order one for that price. Will he be a social outcast if I don't?
Would you pay that price for a high school ring?

TC

When I was in high school, EVERYONE had a class ring. I received mine as a Christmas gift, and I loved it. I continued to wear it for a while during college, and I still have it in my jewelry box.

Fast forward to today: I'd estimate that 50% of my high school seniors have class rings. That's probably partially because of the increase in price, but it's also because today's high school students have considerably less school spirit and school pride than we did "back in the day" and the general feeling of "belonging" to your school doesn't seem to exist in the same way it did back then. Students also don't seem to care about letter jackets as much as we did back then.

Bottom line: a student without a class ring will not be an outcast.

Personally, I'd probably encourage my daughters to choose one of the least expensive options. I'd probably allow her to choose it as a Christmas or birthday gift. If she insisted that only a more expensive model would do, I'd give her the option of working off a portion of the cost.

 

[MrsPete]

I tell you though -I about fell over when DS came home with a packet for a Middle School class ring last year in 7th grade!!! There was no way I was ordering him a middle school class ring. Their main selling point was "You can trade it in towards your High School class ring" I couldn't believe they were trying to sell class rings to middle schoolers and I couldn't believe the number of parents who actually bought them for their kids!!

I've seen those advertised, but they aren't catching on here. I've never seen a real one on a student's hand -- and I teach in a fairly affluent area.

My high school ring had that same "trade up for a college ring" guantee, but I never cared about a college ring.

 

[bettyann29]

Im planning on getting DD a special ring for graduation but not a "graduation ring".. I want to get something that will be special to her and that she will wear after graduation rather than something she will stick in a jewelry box..

 

["Got Disney"]

ummmmm...so, NOT!!! sorry but I would not spend more than $150.00 and I have never known anybody to wear theres or even know where it is after they bought it!

Why do they cost so much anyway

I have 2 boys and they are less likely to wear a class ring than if I had a girls. Would rather make them a momento of something special. Whent he time comes I will figure it out.

To answer your question about being an outcast....I would think not. But I am 50, menopauseal and have 2 boys that are only 10 and 13, so what do I know

Wish you luck on your decision

 

[Kath2003]

I'll take a stab at this question, though I don't think it's going to change your mind:

I've scrimped and saved so that my children can attend college. I have enough for them to have their tuition and fees, room and board, and books paid. I've done this for two reasons: 1) I want them to be able to graduate from college debt-free, and 2) I want them to be able to work just a few hours each week (say, 10-15) for pocket money so that they can devote the majority of their time to being college students (which means better grades and graduating on time).

If they choose to work more and more hours at a part-time job so that they have larger "entertainment budgets", it flies in the face of what I've worked for all these years. If they can go to class and work lots of hours, why'd I sacrafice all that time to save?

When they're in college, my expectation is that they will work full-time (even over time) during the summer months, and I will encourage them to stash that money so they have some reserves for the school year -- that'll allow them to take an occasional weekend trip to the beach or buy a nice outfit for a special occasion. By starting the school year with a little in savings, working just a few hours a week will give them plenty of spending money.

Even without savings, the minimum wage here is about $12 per hour. So working 15 hours a week (which it what I used to work), gives you around $800 a month. That's one heck of an entertainment budget already, especially if you're already paying their food, lodgings, fees and books. My parents worked out how much I'd NEED and gave me that amount - they factored in my earnings into their financial contribution towards my education. If I wanted to go out, then I had to fund it myself. If I wanted new clothes, I had to fund it myself.

 

[mickeysgal]

They're very nice shoes? I still have them, 6 years later. That's only $50 a year

Like I said, if your child has the money, why shouldn't they buy them? $300 is a couple of CDs, a few meals out, a few cinema trips with friends, a new pair of jeans, a few Starbucks coffees and a new pair of sneakers, would you stop them buying that over a period of several months? At least I have something to show for all my hard work (as I would if I'd bought a class ring with it). If I'd frittered it away on smaller items, I'd have never noticed it vanishing.

Here's how it works in our house. If they're earning the money themselves AND putting away enough in savings - both long term (college, car, type savings) and short term saving (christmas presents) AND still have enough money for those Starbucks, CD's, jeans, and new shoes (everyday expenses) beyond what we already provide for them, THEN I'd say go for it - they could buy it. We have long ago set the percentage of what goes in long term savings, short term savings, and spendable cash. It's something they're already used to.

If they only had enough money to buy the ring and then they turn around and "need' the new shoes, jeans,etc. and now can't afford it, and they then turn to ME to buy it, thats when I'd say NO. They can't have everything they want and they have to learn to have the foresight to plan for the things they want while still taking care of business (savings and everyday expenses). Kudos to the kids that can manage this and have earned the funds to do so, but so many kids are still in the learning process of managing money effectively and learning how to temper immediate gratification.

Now if they're not earning any money themselves, then it's up to mom and dad to look at the budget and not feel guilty if it's not financially feasible.

 

[Tuffcookie]

Got Disney wrote: But I am 50, menopauseal and have 2 boys that are only 10 and 13, so what do I know

I know what you mean...I'm 54, with 2 DSs...18 years apart!!! (Does that qualify me for the old-fogie club? )

TC

 

[Tuffcookie]

Kath2003 wrote: Even without savings, the minimum wage here is about $12 per hour.




TC

 

[Kath2003]

If they only had enough money to buy the ring and then they turn around and "need' the new shoes, jeans,etc. and now can't afford it, and they then turn to ME to buy it, thats when I'd say NO. They can't have everything they want and they have to learn to have the foresight to plan for the things they want while still taking care of business (savings and everyday expenses). Kudos to the kids that can manage this and have earned the funds to do so, but so many kids are still in the learning process of managing money effectively and learning how to temper immediate gratification.

Indeed. My parents would have laughed at me if I'd asked them for money when I was earning plenty. Equally, because I could afford everything I needed, save for college and fund the everyday expenses that I wanted, they didn't care what I did with the remainder.

Now if they're not earning any money themselves, then it's up to mom and dad to look at the budget and not feel guilty if it's not financially feasible.

Earning money wasn't optional at age 16+ in my house.

 

[pixie dust 112]

My DD came home with the information about class rings last May. We were lucky that we had tons of options for our rings. She picked out a ring that was $450.00. I told her that Dh and I would contribute $150.00 to any ring that she wanted, but that she would have to pay for the rest herself. The ring she wanted was sterling silver. When we went to talk to the rep and order the ring, she found that she could get the same ring with a less expensive metal (can't remeber what they call it, but it's durable and you can't tell the difference between it and the sterling when looking at it) for much less. So she picked the less expensive metal and the total after tax came to $147.00 Funny how that metal was just fine when she found out she'd have to pay for the upgrade to silver herself. The ring came in last week and it really is beautiful. Very delicate.

I got my ring in the fall of 1978. Growing up my family, if you wanted a ring you had to pay for it yourself. I think mine was about $250.00, for 10K gold. It was just when the gold market had skyrocketed!

 

[mickeysgal]

Earning money wasn't optional at age 16+ in my house.

I agree - unless they're involved in something so consuming (sports, marching band, etc.) and it's unrealistic for them to work, then absolutely, they need to earn it themselves.

 

[mickeysgal]

Funny how that metal was just fine when she found out she'd have to pay for the upgrade to silver herself.

Doesn't it always work that way? When it's on the parent's dime, it's ok. When it has to come out of their pocket, well then, thats another story.

 

[Kath2003]

I agree - if they're not involved in anything (sports, marching band, etc.), and its not realistic for them to work, then absolutely, they need to earn it themselves.

It wasn't optional PERIOD in my house - which meant sacrifices.