WWYD--gift from Parents

[Disney2NJ]

My mom and dad are buying a very generous gift (riding mower) for my brother and his wife. This will cover all gifts for the rest of the year for them (Christmas, Birthday etc.) This is to help them out since they purchased a new house with a large property--and the grass needs to be cut!!

My parents offered to purchase something of similar value for my family. My husband and I can think of many things very easily that we could ask for but we've been thinking of giving them a counteroffer.

Our counteroffer would be to join us and our two girls on our next Disney vacation (date to TBD). We usually go once a year. My parents came with us about three years ago but my youngest was too little to remember. Disney is not their favorite place but the did get into the spirit and have a great time. My 7 year old recalls it as being her favorite trip.

Our thinking is the memories and family time is more valuable than a "thing."

Do you like our counteroffer??? What would you do?

 

[mtomlin66]

I think it is a great idea!

 

[ceecee]

Great idea! Ask them to babysit while you and DH go out to dinner...at WDW!

 

[MinnieForMe]

Yes, do it! We bring my parents every year and it's the best time. My kids love interacting with their grandparents. My parents went into the parks with us when the kids were smaller but now prefer to stay at the resort. They are always willing to play in the pool, take the kids for a walk, to the playground or babysit so we can go out to dinner.

 

[OhMari]

Get them to go to the Park to do 2 or 3 things that your kids truly enjoy, make an ADR for a favorite resturant, then let them go back to the resort. You wouldn't have to spend more than 2 or 3 hours at the most. Maybe this is what they are afraid of, long days in the park.

 

[horseshowmom]

 

[esk]

Don't be upset if they don't agree.

My mom loves me but does not live Disney....can't do crowds, doesn't like lines and also does not like buffet meals that cost $20. It's just not her thing.

So she went once with us and politely said she was not interested in coming again. She has, however, been to other places with us.

If they say no, have a back up plan for maybe another trip or a thing, because they just might not want to go.

 

[mkstlowe]

I think its a great counteroffer! I have to agree our times at Disney with my parents were the best. We are going in Oct and my mother has decided to join us. My Dad will be with us in heart!

 

[DisneyCher]

Don't be upset if they don't agree.My mom loves me but does not live Disney....can't do crowds, doesn't like lines and also does not like buffet meals that cost $20. It's just not her thing.

So she went once with us and politely said she was not interested in coming again. She has, however, been to other places with us.

If they say no, have a back up plan for maybe another trip or a thing, because they just might not want to go.

ABSOLUTELY, my thoughts exactly!

My parents love Disney and are looking forward to taking our whole family on a big trip in a few years when my son is a bit older. My in-laws, on the other hand, have never been and have no interest at all. Quite frankly, I do not think they would enjoy a Disney trip one bit. But they are more than happy to give us big, expensive gifts.

 

[mom2t]

My parents love Disney and took us a great deal as children. They are in their 70s now and went with us in Jan. Got a great deal 40% off off at Old Key West. I planned everything. We ate meals in. In the morning they headed out with us and we all did things that they would want to do. They returned to the room for the afternoon and rested and we continued on. We ate dinner in the condo and rested in the evening. We only went back out 1 night to MK to see the parade and fireworks and enjoy eveing rides. My parents say next to a cruise of the Hawaiian islands for their 50th anniversary (that has always been their dream) this was the best trip they ever took because of spending time with my child. I needed to use the money to pay off some credit cards but I believe it was money well spent.

 

[Swimalie]

I love the idea. Last year my husband, son and I went for my son's 5th birthday. We went for 6 days and my parents joined us for the last 3 of them. It was part of my son's birthday present. He loved having them along. Only downside is now he says he expects them at Disney every time we go

 

[Marionnette]

My mom and dad are buying a very generous gift (riding mower) for my brother and his wife. This will cover all gifts for the rest of the year for them (Christmas, Birthday etc.) This is to help them out since they purchased a new house with a large property--and the grass needs to be cut!!

My parents offered to purchase something of similar value for my family. My husband and I can think of many things very easily that we could ask for but we've been thinking of giving them a counteroffer.

Our counteroffer would be to join us and our two girls on our next Disney vacation (date to TBD). We usually go once a year. My parents came with us about three years ago but my youngest was too little to remember. Disney is not their favorite place but the did get into the spirit and have a great time. My 7 year old recalls it as being her favorite trip.

Our thinking is the memories and family time is more valuable than a "thing."

Do you like our counteroffer??? What would you do?

I might be the lone dissenter here, but I know that if my parents had offered to purchase something we *needed* and I countered with a suggestion that they spend the money on a vacation, I would be getting neither. And to be honest, I wouldn't blame them. I think that making a counteroffer puts them in a rocky spot they may not want to be in. They might feel uncomfortable withdrawing their offer but may not be enthusiastic about being manipulated into spending the money on a vacation that they may not want to take.

 

[MickeyBA]

I think it's great! They are asking you to tell them something you want that you can't spend the money on right now. The trip is what you are choosing. It can be presented in a way that makes it clear that you would understand if they don't want to go. I don't see anything wrong with it at all. I think that if my daughters someday wanted me to share their special moments with their kids I would be flattered and would probably go no matter where it was.

 

[robinb]

I'm confused. Are you asking them to pay for only their portion or for all of you? In any case, I think I agree with Marionnette. Your parents are offering to pay for something you *need* not a vacation for them or for you.

 

[marie1203]

Great idea! We have tried many times with my IL but they always seem to have and excuse not to do it and instead send us stuff to do what they want to do . They have tried to pick all 3 vacations for us this year!

 

[Sandi]

I didn't read the OP's post as saying that her parents are offering to only buy something that they "need," rather, something of a similar dollar value. I also read it as her asking that her parents not give her anything except their presence on the trip which each would independently pay for.

I would think that suggesting that they'd prefer to use the money for an "experience" with the grands where the grands put that money toward a vacation with them would be fine, but I'd also be ready for rejection.

My mom is always trying to "even things up" among her children. My dad is a bit more of a realist -- some of his kids need more financial help than others. I'm fortunate to be in the "don't need help" category.

 

[DebMcDonald]

Love love love the idea and when I have grandchildren I would love to be offered something like this - it would be great memories for all those involved.

 

[mom to minnie&mickey]

My mom and dad are buying a very generous gift (riding mower) for my brother and his wife. This will cover all gifts for the rest of the year for them (Christmas, Birthday etc.) This is to help them out since they purchased a new house with a large property--and the grass needs to be cut!!

My parents offered to purchase something of similar value for my family. My husband and I can think of many things very easily that we could ask for but we've been thinking of giving them a counteroffer.

Our counteroffer would be to join us and our two girls on our next Disney vacation (date to TBD). We usually go once a year. My parents came with us about three years ago but my youngest was too little to remember. Disney is not their favorite place but the did get into the spirit and have a great time. My 7 year old recalls it as being her favorite trip.

Our thinking is the memories and family time is more valuable than a "thing."

Do you like our counteroffer??? What would you do?

WOW! In a world where everybody just wants more and more material things
this has got to be one of the most UNSELFISH thing I have heard or read of in a very long time. If your parents take you up on your offer the memories everyone will have will last a lifetime (unlike material objects). May good karma knock upon your door very soon. Well done.

 

[Bren's Mom]

I would comply with your parents request and give them a couple of ideas of practical things your family could use, or even fun things they would enjoy. ALONG with the offer for them to join you on your vacation. Let them know what YOUR first choice is (the trip) but also that you appreciate their generosity and if THEY don't feel it's the right thing then they can choose one of the other things.

 

[AnnieEMT]

If this is a case of your parents having x amount of extra $$$ that they want to spend, then I think it's fabulous to want them to go on a trip with you, as opposed to buying something for the house (which, btw, is also very generous!) -- if they are up for it, & the money is out there as extra, then by all means, why not?!!!