Would you let DS and girlfriend go on trip together?

[Antonia]

DS and girlfriend are planning a trip together when they graduate high school in May. Both are very responsible and I think mature for their age. They look like they are in their 20's. They were planning to go on a cruise, but now are rethinking that due to so much sickness on cruise ships.
I feel a little funny about them going on a trip together. Of course, I probably won't be able to stop them. They are inseparable and madly in love. Everyone who sees them comments on how in love they are. You can even see it in a picture of them. They aren't publicly affectionate - it is just oozing out of their eyes and every little gesture.
Have any of you had a kid go on a trip like this with their sweetie?

 

[SonjaB]

No.

 

[Mom2Em]

I have no suggestion, I am not in a position to post an answer but I am sending you parental *PD* to help you make the right choice... whatever it might be!

 

[helenabear]

My parents would have killed me if I went on a trip like that when I just graduated high school (and I am only 25). Truthfully I didn't go on any trips with my DH until after we were married (and I am obviously not including flying together to visit his family though) and I had no desire to go anyway.

 

[hercamore]

No way,

I have a dd l9 and ds 21. No cruises with their honeys. That can wait til they're married!

How about a family trip to DW and take the gf along?


Herc..

 

[DonnaS]

Of course, I probably won't be able to stop them.

I think that is the key thing. If they are over 18, able to book the vacation, and pay for it-- what can you do? You could definitely voice your displeasure (and should since that is the way you feel), but I doubt that forbidding it would do much other than alienating them. You probably realize that they can't do anything on a cruise or vacation that they couldn't do at home.

I think it is great that they are even discussing this with you. It shows that there is open communication.

 

[bambii]

they maybe mature, but they maybe will be total different when they get away from there parents, and they Im sure will loose up on the vacation. and a lot of stops on cruise ship the drinking age will be 18 and that might just loosen them up a lot. If you decided to let them go make sure she is using a long time birth control like the depo shot. kids seem to forget to take the pill every day.

i would be a chaprone, My child would room with me and the friend can get a room next to mine, that way if my kid is not home at 2:00am I can go bang on the door.

My step daughter who lives in michigan, it was her choose to live in michigan when she lived with us we had too many rules we live in S.D.

She got pregnant at 15 had her baby two days after her 16th birthday. I became a grand ma at 26.

 

[Antonia]

We are thinking that a chaperoned trip would be the thing to do. I DO NOT want to be a grandma.

 

[JohnTBap]

I don't know what I would do. At that point, I plan on having Sister Mary Alyssa in the convent. And Mr Baby in the seminary..... The best to you.

 

[Meriweather]

Well, I would say that I didn't approve...but like others have said....you can't really stop them, just voice your disapproval.

That being said my DS and GF are going to WDW in March (see my counter)...but they are older.

 

[Antonia]

Meriweather - how old are they?

 

[Michelle]

Many cruise lines require that you be at least 21 to sail without an adult, so they may need to re-think that.

Will your son be living with you after high school or will he be in college? If he is still at home then you do have the right to make the rules. I have to say that I went to visit my boyfriend during spring break his freshman year in college, but my parents would never have let us take a trip together right after graduating high school.

At this point you've raised him the best you can and just hope that they make responsible decisions. If they are that inseparable then most likely "things" have occurred already and just hope they are mature enough to handle it.

 

[disneyjunkie]

I don't think you'll have to say no.

The cruise lines will.

I believe there's a policy that says someone in the cabin has to be 21, unless they are married. If they are both 18, they can't sail alone.

 

[SeaSpray]

I wouldn't allow my underage DS to go away anywhere without an adult, nevermind his girlfriend.

And if he was living in my house, I don't care HOW old he was, I would not allow it, unless the woman was his wife. If he said there was nothing I could do to stop him, he'd find his belongings in a box on the front porch when he got home, and the locks changed. I realize this sounds drastic, but we have pretty strict rules and morals here, and no matter what other people think, we won't bend them. Fortunately, my DSs who are now 14 and 11 already are very well aware of how we feel on issues such as this, so I don't anticipate them even being silly enough to ask.

By the way, this girl's parents are allowing her to go away with a boy???

 

[Meriweather]

Originally posted by Antonia
Meriweather - how old are they?

DS is 23 and his GF will turn 25 while they are there....I think that is a big difference.

I'm okay with them going, but I don't think I would want my DD 20 doing it

 

[Antonia]

I agree it is a big difference. We will probably end up doing a chaperoned trip. I just don't feel good about the two of them on a trip together.
Glad to hear that about cruise ships and 21. I definitely don't want them on a ship.

 

[FOJMO]

Originally posted by Antonia
I DO NOT want to be a grandma.

At their age, I don't see where's that's your choice.

You have to believe that you taught him well and he will make HIS decision based on your teaching. That's all you can do -- it's not your choice any longer... sorry.

 

[jamsmom]

Okay, as a mom to as 12 year old, the mom in me says no way. But, the "cool aunt" in me that everyone thinks is still young, says they will do what they want and your actions can push them away depending on the way you handle it.

No way do you want to be a grandparent... but I told my mom once that if I wanted to to that, I could do it before midnight. Your son could do it in his home city as well as Orlando.

I am no help. I would go with them if you can afford it. You don't have to hang out with them all the time

 

[Ranatra]

To answer your question, NO, I would not let them go. And I don't agree that if they are over 18 that I can't stop them. As long as my kids are under my roof, I'm supporting them and paying for their college tuition, I certainly can.
I can't believe that this girl's parents are going along with this!!

Now my 23 year old who has graduated college and is on his own can do as he pleases.

 

[Antonia]

Her Dad is dead - since she was 7. And her mom married him at a young age (17).