Would you buy something even though your S.O. Is completely against it?

[TippyThomas]

Sounds like it will be a disaster if you do this.
No, I would not in this situation.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

They have been overrun here since the pandemic started. A lot of their adoptable cats have been in foster care since they had no room. My daughter fostered a cat for 3 months until they had room for him. The shelter provided all the food and litter and medical care. He had a wound on his tail. They have been doing a lot of "Clear the Shelter Events" too and all cats over a certain age are free all the time.

Sure but again I said unless you get them on a free weekend so that would cover the above and we're not talking about the pandemic unless the pandemic has been happening ever since you've gotten pets

2) I don't buy pets, I adopt them from animal shelter

'Buy' is all relative here.



**But that's very sweet of your daughter for fostering the cat, our neighbor does that with dogs, kudos to those who can do the fostering

 

[Sanchez]

If there is a controlling butthead in this relationship it may not be the husband . . .

 

[Heigh-Ho]

No don't do it, it's not fair to the pet either. Take what you have for now and be happy

 

[hsmamato2]

Unequivocal answer- no.

 

[RamblingMad]

Is he allergic? If he is, then getting one would be a bad idea. I have dogs, but I’m super allergic to cats.

 

[Skywalker]

There are some things I might buy against my husband's wishes, but I would draw the line beyond certain price tags, and living things lol.

You say he is controlling AND not an animal person... And yet in 30 years you have "always" had dogs and at times a cat? And currently have two dogs now?

Sounds like Mr. "Controlling" has compromised a lot !!!

 

[Castillo Mom]

No, I wouldn't. Decisions regarding whether to get a pet or not should be jointly made. Let's flip it the other way around. What if he wanted to do something that you were adamantly against? Not only that, as parents, we need to maintain a united front. If not, children will pit one parent against another. Just not a healthy dynamic to create overall.

 

[tvguy]

Sure but again I said unless you get them on a free weekend so that would cover the above and we're not talking about the pandemic unless the pandemic has been happening ever since you've gotten pets





'Buy' is all relative here.



**But that's very sweet of your daughter for fostering the cat, our neighbor does that with dogs, kudos to those who can do the fostering

Well, I am speaking of the SPCA, so that could be the difference. As a non-profit they have strong financial support from local businesses and they have cultivated a strong revenue stream from estate gifts.

 

[Pooh2]

Sounds like OP's spouse is treated like a doormat in his own home.

 

[cheryl.UK]

Bought a Jeep once when my husband said no. I bid for it on eBay one night as we watched TV and picked it up 2 days later. The first he knew of it was when he came home to find it on the drive.

However, that's not the same as a cat. I wouldn't bring an animal into a home where it wasn't wanted.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Well, I am speaking of the SPCA, so that could be the difference. As a non-profit they have strong financial support from local businesses and they have cultivated a strong revenue stream from estate gifts.

We have a SPCA in our area it's actually one of the largest no-kill shelter in our area..they charge too An 8yr old cat I saw is $60, a 5 month old is $180 (random cats, just a quick look) to give random examples. Now the cats that always are free are ones part of the Barn Cat Program and that's because those cats serve a particular purpose suited to their temperaments and are meant to stay outdoors (with adequate shelter from the elements) and are working cats.

Your point was you don't buy, you adopt from a shelter. My point was adopting from a shelter still comes with fees. It's like tomayto, tomahto. Yes there are times when the fees are waived. That's neither here nor there. With all due respect this is derailing the thread at this point I'll just leave it there

 

[Heigh-Ho]

Is he allergic? If he is, then getting one would be a bad idea. I have dogs, but I’m super allergic to cats.

I think the author of the thread said they've had a cat in the past, still could be allergic though.

 

[tink89]

Would I buy something for myself if DH was against it ? Probably. If I like it I like it. Would I buy something for my kids or the home(big items/pet)? NO.

 

[mjkacmom]

I think the author of the thread said they've had a cat in the past, still could be allergic though.

My SIL (who I love, she has the kindest heart), adopted cats even though her husband was allergic. Most of the time people who knew her heart and inability to say no to someone in need convinced her to take the cat (always older ones who probably would be euthanized). I used to apartment/cat sit for her and I’m allergic, I do t know how he did it.

 

[J'aime Paris]

No, I would not get the kitten if your DH is against it.

We got our DD a kitten when she was 6 years old.
Fast forward, DD is 21 and living away as senior in college.

The cat is turning 17 soon......and lives with DH and I.
We are fine with it because DH and I agreed mutually to add the kitten to our family many years ago.

 

[BuckeyeBama]

My wife and I compromise - we do not draw lines in the sand. I would have a discussion about the reasoning and see if we could find common ground. But, no, I would never betray my wife by doing something that I know she is totally opposed to. We are partners.

 

[ronandannette]

I understand what you’re saying but if it was up to my husband we would NEVER have had any pets
He’s miserable with the 2 we have now

Then try explaining (without sounding completely selfish) why on God's green earth you would demand another one? He has apparently already has compromised for the sake of you and the kids. Which one of you is the butthead again?

As to the question - no. Niether my husband or I would ever, ever do anything the other was "completely against".

 

[okeydokey]

A pet, no way.

 

[brockash]

Hi

it’s been a while since I posted but wanted some honest opinions and I know u guys will give them lol
My daughter 16 really wants a kitten
She’s wanted one since she was little
I’ve put her off but she’s still pretty persistent about it
We have 2 dogs that she shows, so she spends a lot of time with them.
Husband is completely against the kitten, no good reason just that we don’t need another animal , vet bills, food , litter box etc etc
DH is not an animal person , like his whole family
In the 30 years we’ve been married we’ve always had dogs and at a time a cat
He tolerates them but not like me and the kids are , completely in love with them
DH can be controlling and a real butthead to put it nicely
I’ve always just said ok but this time I’m inclined to say forget it we’re getting a kitten

Am I crazy ?

I don't think I'd get a living thing (other than a plant) if my significant other was totally against it. My dh got a 2nd dog that I waa totally against...that was 2 years ago...I'm still pretty annoyed about it, and get resentful every time I have to take carw of the dog or the dog makes a mess etc. Having said that we haven't had the best relationship so...