Would this bother you?

[ronandannette]

...On the plus side, I do have lots of time to Dis and sit and stew on things all day.

There's your problem right there...DIS or no DIS, stewing over anything you can't change is never good.

This is pretty blunt, but I agree. For whatever reason, the assistant manager wants to show appreciation to the full-time assistant. I would chalk it up to their relationship and not dwell on it. Personally, I wouldn't let it hurt my feelings, especially if the assistant manager is paying out of his/her own pocket.

I'm guessing the two of them have a friendship that may go beyond the office. Plenty of people are friends with their co-workers or even their staff members; some really have no other social outlet. But I also think it's unwise of anybody in management to be seen to be treating anyone in a preferential way. OP - have these two worked together a lot longer than you have been there? Is your manager someone who was promoted from the rank and file and perhaps they used to be peers? Both of these things could contribute to them having a different sort of relationship than the boss has with you and some people have a harder time than others compartmentalizing. If it realllllly drives you crazy I'd probably try a (single, one-time only) flippant comment along the lines of "Gee, where's mine?" next time it happens, delivered with a great big smile . Maybe the boss doesn't realize you even notice.

 

[cabanafrau]

This is pretty blunt, but I agree. For whatever reason, the assistant manager wants to show appreciation to the full-time assistant. I would chalk it up to their relationship and not dwell on it. Personally, I wouldn't let it hurt my feelings, especially if the assistant manager is paying out of his/her own pocket.

It's blunt, but it's also frequently how I deal with things -- particularly this kind of situation where it's not a good thing to let an issue like this get comfortable and take up real estate in your head. Once I do that I wind up dwelling on it, getting more upset about an issue where there's really no upside to trying to address it. It's not as if there is any way not to cause an uncomfortable situation by saying anything to the manager or to the coworker. My advice to OP is to be cheerfully stupid about this.

 

[eliza61]

Wait, you guys really think it's "hurtful" that a boss picks up a lunch tab for a full time employee?

Op, could these two simply be friends?

To answer your question, no I would not be upset, not in the least. I could care less.

 

[Rhombus]

Since you don't get a lunch break, the manager should at least get you a cookie or something on the occasions she buys lunch for the full time employee.

 

[mmouse37]

If I was the manager it wouldn't matter if the two employees were full time or part time. If i was picking up lunch (and treating) I would pick it up for both. Just common courtesy.

I have worked in offices (and retail) all my life (both corporate and a very small office) and if I ever brought anything in (baked goods) or was going to pick up something to bring back I would ask my immediate co-workers if they wanted anything. I would not pick up the tab if it was understood that I was just picking up food for them as a courtesy to bring back but if I was the manager and bringing lunch in to treat it would be for both employees. I would feel funny bringing it in for one and not the other.

Now, maybe there is some special deal between the OP's co-worker and manager but I still think it is on the rude side to give to one and not the other. Little things like that just foster a good working relationship and can keep morale up.

MJ

 

[littleblackegg]

As a manager, I can assure you that kind of office dynamic will absolutely get the manager in hot water one day and she'll have to approach the work place with a more egalitarian ethic. Sometimes we have to take one across the nose to learn these things. I myself would just ignore it because you have different hours and responsibilities. I personally would take the assistant OUT for lunch to make a gesture of appreciation. It's a more significant gesture, and it removes him/her from being seen as getting gifts/favors that others don't get.

 

[Art 1]

I work part time in an office as and office assistant with one other person who is the full time office assistant. We both work for the same group of people, but obviously since she is full time she has more responsibilities and works more with the manager and assistant manager.

Every month or two the assistant manager brings the full timer lunch, but not me. I am there until 2:00 everyday, so I'm there for lunch.

I guess this bothers me some, but I also understand. Just curious if this would bother others or am I just being too sensitive.

It would not bother me. Might not even notice. It would probably be me bringing the two of them lunch. Maybe some day try that out and see how it goes.

 

[Hrhpd]

Thanks everybody, I think I was just trying to validate my feelings.

I would never say anything. My coworker does do more than me and I'm sure it's just a way of saying thank you for your hard work. Plus I like her and would never want to deny any little extra perks she might get.

As you all have said, certainly not worth saying anything about.

FYI...I get a 15 minutes break, but no lunch. I usually just eat at my desk. My coworker always takes her lunch, as she should, so it's not a thank you for working through lunch just mostly a thank you for doing a good job.

On the plus side, I do have lots of time to Dis and sit and stew on things all day.

I am just curious how you know so much about this lunch? You know the manager always pays for it and the admin never pays him back, you know it is a thank you for a job well done. You know it is an extra "perk" she gets that you do not.

You say you don't get a lunch break, so that means you work 4 or less hours. And if you are there till two, that means you don't come in till at least 10, or basically lunch coverage hours. Since you do not get a lunch, I would not expect to receive a lunch or anything else. And unless you absolutely know there is no other arrangement for work done on hours you are not there, I would not assume this is an 'extra perk' she gets that you do not.

I am part time too that works over lunch time. I never pay attention to who is buying whom lunch because it really is not my business and I don't get a lunch. I would not want somebody to pick me up a lunch since I would only have my 15 minute break to gulp it down. And let's face it, us part timers just don't get everything the full timers do.

 

[cluvsdisney]

If I was the manager it wouldn't matter if the two employees were full time or part time. If i was picking up lunch (and treating) I would pick it up for both. Just common courtesy.

I have worked in offices (and retail) all my life (both corporate and a very small office) and if I ever brought anything in (baked goods) or was going to pick up something to bring back I would ask my immediate co-workers if they wanted anything. I would not pick up the tab if it was understood that I was just picking up food for them as a courtesy to bring back but if I was the manager and bringing lunch in to treat it would be for both employees. I would feel funny bringing it in for one and not the other.

Now, maybe there is some special deal between the OP's co-worker and manager but I still think it is on the rude side to give to one and not the other. Little things like that just foster a good working relationship and can keep morale up.

MJ

I agree with this. I don't think managers should show such preferential treatment toward one employee over another. And if I were the OP, I would be a little bothered by it. I would "get it" I'm part time, but if I am working during lunch hours and get a break, I can't help but think it would be nice once in a while to get treated to lunch. After all, it wouldn't take 15 minutes to eat a sandwich or something at my desk instead of taking the break at another time.

 

[pryncess527]

If I was the manager it wouldn't matter if the two employees were full time or part time. If i was picking up lunch (and treating) I would pick it up for both. Just common courtesy.

I have worked in offices (and retail) all my life (both corporate and a very small office) and if I ever brought anything in (baked goods) or was going to pick up something to bring back I would ask my immediate co-workers if they wanted anything. I would not pick up the tab if it was understood that I was just picking up food for them as a courtesy to bring back but if I was the manager and bringing lunch in to treat it would be for both employees. I would feel funny bringing it in for one and not the other.

Now, maybe there is some special deal between the OP's co-worker and manager but I still think it is on the rude side to give to one and not the other. Little things like that just foster a good working relationship and can keep morale up.

MJ

Ditto. when my boss treats us to lunch, he includes all the staff --- even the temps and our grad student worker.

I do have a special relationship with one of the higher ups at my job and when she went out of town, she'd bring me back a gift and did not always bring something for the entire staff. Or she'd bring something for everyone and get me something nicer. She always made a point to give me my gift in private so as to not draw attention and create bad feelings. I just think of that type of thing as common courtesy.

 

[NewRVLady]

FYI...I get a 15 minutes break, but no lunch. I usually just eat at my desk. My coworker always takes her lunch, as she should, so it's not a thank you for working through lunch just mostly a thank you for doing a good job.

On the plus side, I do have lots of time to Dis and sit and stew on things all day.

Is it legal not to give you a lunch break?!

 

[RedAngie]

Is it legal not to give you a lunch break?!

It varies by state and depends on the amount of hours worked. But, yes, it's legal to NOT give a lunch break in many cases.

I do think it would be courteous for the manager to bring OP something when she buys the other worker lunch, especially since they sit right next to each other. Not mandatory, of course, just a nice gesture.

 

[minnie mum]

Is it legal not to give you a lunch break?!

If the OP is only working a few hours per day, she would only be entitled to a coffee break.

 

[smiths02]

I am just curious how you know so much about this lunch? You know the manager always pays for it and the admin never pays him back, you know it is a thank you for a job well done. You know it is an extra "perk" she gets that you do not.

You say you don't get a lunch break, so that means you work 4 or less hours. And if you are there till two, that means you don't come in till at least 10, or basically lunch coverage hours. Since you do not get a lunch, I would not expect to receive a lunch or anything else. And unless you absolutely know there is no other arrangement for work done on hours you are not there, I would not assume this is an 'extra perk' she gets that you do not.

I am part time too that works over lunch time. I never pay attention to who is buying whom lunch because it really is not my business and I don't get a lunch. I would not want somebody to pick me up a lunch since I would only have my 15 minute break to gulp it down. And let's face it, us part timers just don't get everything the full timers do.

I don't know where she works, but you can work well over 4 hours without a lunch break
"Only 24 states require employers to provide a meal break during a full work day. These state laws generally require a 30-minute break."

In most places I worked if I worked anything less than 7 hours there was no lunch break.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Okay, if you do not actually get a lunch break, then that might factor in.

So, yes, this might bother me.
But, it isn't because I would expect anything.
I just think it is really kind of rude and inconsiderate.

I am big on the whole rule about food - bring enough for everyone around, or nothing at all.

And, even though you are part-time, are you not a valued employee...
I really do not appreciate preferential treatment, and it is just a BAD management practice, all the way around.

That being said, there are a lot of clueless or rude and inconsiderate people in this world.
Not everything is 'right' or 'fair'.
So, this kind of thing is something that I would really let-go and not be bothered over.

 

[NewRVLady]

ok-I see the OP is there until 2
so its probably a 6 hour day

 

[tnkr_bell]

Just to clarify, I work from 9-2 each day so a total of 5 hours. I would have to work a 6 hour day to get a lunch break and if I did that, I would have to clock out for 30 minutes.

So no I don't get a lunch break, but I do eat lunch or a least something throughout the day.

 

[sasywtch]

I always do the wrong thing so I'll tell you what I would do. I would say something. Don't do that! It only makes you look bad. We have a lot of favoritism at my work, it has caused a lot of morale problems which comes from poor management. You have to think of it that way. Honestly, how can a manager buy for one and not even offer the other? Even though you are part time and only get 15 minutes, if you work during the day, you get hungry at noon too. Office workers, sure we've all snuck a bite of uneaten lunch in between typing letters so only having 15 minutes, means nothing.

I think what I would do is make me some great dinners, put some in Tupperware and take to work or maybe go to a Chinese place, buy extra and take some to work. Treat yourself. I doubt you will be able to let it roll off your back because I think it's making you feel you aren't valued as much but you can treat yourself. Everyone likes to feel valued and they are doing a good job but as another coworker said to some of us the other day, these people aren't your friends or family, they are your coworkers. You go home to your family and friends.

 

[DisneyPrince1982]

So no I don't get a lunch break, but I do eat lunch or a least something throughout the day.

Isn't it possible that since you don't get a lunch break, your boss thinks you shouldn't be eating lunch during your shift, and therefore didn't buy you a lunch? Doesn't seem out of the realm of possibility.

 

[tnkr_bell]

Isn't it possible that since you don't get a lunch break, your boss thinks you shouldn't be eating lunch during your shift, and therefore didn't buy you a lunch? Doesn't seem out of the realm of possibility.

Well since I'm doing exactly what my coworker did when she had my part time job, nope I don't think that at all.