Will it ever happen?

[WDW_BDW]

Ok, this may sound silly, but I have been thinking about this for a while now. I'm 22 years old. I am a first year teacher, and I have always been very driven and goal-oriented. I never gave myself time for relationships. Now, I am starting to worry that I will never find anyone-that I will never get married and be a mom. As I am writing this, I feel silly. I know I am young, but it seems like everyone around me is settling down. I keep telling myself to be patient and when it is time, he will come into my life. Then, I see friends who are into their 30s who are saying the same thing. I know there is no advice you can give me. I guess I just needed to get this out. Everyone around tells me that of course I will find someone. I'm still a little worried! Thanks for listening/reading! You Disers are the best!

 

[ericamanda01]

Trust me your normal to think that, but I assure you that you have plenty of time. I didn't get married until I was 30 and we still don't have kids yet. Granted we have only been married a year. But you have time. Don't look at your age as a factor. It will happen when it happens.

 

[MidNite]

I felt the same way. I didn't get married til I was 27. I thought that day would never come.

 

[laurie31]

I felt EXACTLY like you did when I was 22. Suddenly I was out of college working at a job where there were few to no prospects and I wondered how in heck would I ever meet someone. Well, I met DH when I was 23 : We married right after I turned 26 and DD1 was born when I was 29. These were great ages for me to do these things. Some people do them younger and some do them older. It will happen for you when the time is right for you. It's hard to trust in that sometimes, but just be happy as yourself. Enjoy all the cool things you can do as a single adult. I went to Europe for 3 weeks before I met DH- because I could. I had no family to care for, no obligations outside my job. Being married and a mom is wonderful, but there's more to life. Don't be so busy looking forward that you miss out on the great stuff you have now :

Laurie

 

[kat3668]

I'm in the same boat as you are however I am 37... i work 3 jobs and have very little time or enthusiasm to even look anymore... As for children I teach at a nursery school 5 days a week so I get my kid fix pretty good but still find myself panicing when I think of ever finding someone to love....If its meant to be then I guess it will happen for me I guess.. keep the faith !!

 

[Terri C]

Don't give up. I met my DH when I was 23 and we married when I was 25. That was 15 years ago but I remember feeling the same way as you.

Terri

 

[TDC Nala]

I will preface this by saying that I am 41, never married and probably never will be.

But that is not because of my age, it is because I don't want it. And if you want it enough, you will do what it takes to find it. Just the fact that you are interested in acquiring a partner shows that you will persevere. You'll take classes where you can meet other persons with the same interests, or ask friends to introduce you to someone they think you'd get along with.

 

[Monte Cristo]

You have plenty of time...he's out there....just keep your eyes open. I met wife at 26 she was 22 and now I am 34 she is 30 and we're about to have our first child. Fear not, you'll find him, or he'll find you.

 

[Miss Kelly]

I feel the same way WDW_BDW. I'm 23 and sometimes I feel that I will never find that someone special.

 

[Shugardrawers]

Oh gosh, you have so much time! I do remember feeling the same way in my early 20's though so don't feel too bad. I married my first husband when I was 24 because I convinced myself it was the thing to do. 2 years later we were kaput. I didn't meet my Dh until I was 36. It was a looooong lonely 10 years in between but he was so worth the wait. Take my advice, don't marry someone you think you can live with, marry someone you KNOW you can't live without. Even if it means waiting many years.

 

[Disney Doll]

Don't worry about it. At 22, you shouldn't be getting married!!!!! Live it up a little.

 

[Blueeyes101817]

I am feeling the same way as you lately! I am 21 and graduating college next may. Alot of my friends are in serious relationships and one of my best friends is probably going to be engaged within a month or so--its hard sometimes, but i am really happy for them. but i want to find a nice guy too

Im also going to school to become a teacher and most of the people i am with on campus are other females...females at my work..it gets annoying!
Im also not a big party and drinking person,,,which is how most people around here are meeting their boyfriends..so here i sit on a friday night

 

[Michie]

Don't worry about it. At 22, you shouldn't be getting married!!!!! Live it up a little.

My son that is 21, he has friends his own age and younger that are already divorced He is finding it hard to find young ladies his age that aren't already married/divorced/have kids As he would say, you are a "hot commodity", you have an education already and you dont have any exes to contend with. Enjoy yourself

 

[rt2dz]

You are 22. You are very young, as you know. And you can't go looking for love, it just finds you when everything is right. Besides, it is my personal opinion that no one should get married before 25. There is such a huge change in people from 13 to 16, from 16 to 18, from 18 to 21, from 21 to 25, but 25 and 30 and 35 and beyond are generally pretty much the same. You are a kid. You have a very long time to find the right person, fall inlove, get married & have kids. If you rush it, it will be a disaster.

If your friends are all in couple-dom, go meet some single friends. Volunteer your time somewhere, join some type of group/club. Just date around. Learn how to enjoy your own company. Concentrate of making friendships and taking care of yourself and then everything else will fall into place.

 

[LeesyUD]

I used to feel the same way...I actually did not even start dating until I was 20....everyone else I knew started when they were 13. The interesting part though is that all my friends that started dating so early are still single at 24/25 and only 1 or 2 had a serious relationship. On the flip side you have me....though I started dating much later....I found a wonderful guy at 23...now 25 years old...we are still together and often talk about marriage. I realized it doesnt matter how early you start or how many you date. One thing I will say though is don't be discouraged if you meet a few wrong guys first. Unfortunately before I met my soulmate (as I like to call him ), I dated some really selfish and rude guys. And those guys caused some of the worst days of my life. However, its weird to say I am glad they did. It made me realize what I don't want in a guy. After 2 particular guys I decided I was not going to put up with any more games or selfishness. I was at a point where I broke out of my shell of "guys are evil" and my shyness, and was just having fun dating to meet new people and getting a better idea of what I wanted in a guy. The thing that was so great was that I could see signs of the nice guys and the not so nice guys alot better now bc of my experience. And now I think I have found the sweetest guy in the world. The best part was is that I found him when I was not eveing looking for anyrhing serious. I had gone a few dates with one guy who was pretty nice but I realized he liked me more than I liked him. I was about to break it off anyway after a few dates, and thats around the time I met my man now. And I wasn't even looking for anything serious! I was trying to get rid of a of a guy who wanted a relationship I just did not want! I think I knew right away that my guy was special. Not wanting a relationship quickly changed to I'm not letting him go anywhere! Thank you all the bad men in my life!

 

[Alaska Catdog]

I met and married my DH at 30. I was well pass that "will I ever find him" stage and well into the "Life is for living, I better get on with it, Sweetie or not" stage.
That year I stopped worrying about what I didn't have and began fulfilling long term goals I'd put on hold while pining for my missing prince charming. I know now that nothing makes you more attractive to a potential mate as living your life to the fullest. I have several proposals that year, most of them made me laugh but the last one touched my soul and we've been together 8 years. I am so blessed. And you will be too.

 

[KarenAylwood]

I'm 23 and w/ a DBF that will eventually become my DH, but the majority of my friends are not even seeing anyone right now. The few years out of college are hard, especially if you're focused on "needing" to find someone.

I've been to a bunch of weddings since college (and a few IN college) but my closest friends are single. The ones who are worried about being single are definitely more unhappy than those who have come to terms with it. I have a friend who held onto a guy from college because she was told "you've got to find your husband in college, once you graduate- that's it." And so she stayed with him even though she wasn't happy- over one and a half YEARS out of college, moved in with him, and two days after Christmas he left her. Just because you have someone in college, doesn't mean it's forever. It's got to be right- it doesn't matter what age it happens at

Once you are ok with not knowing when the time will come that you'll find your DH- that's when it will happen. Just enjoy yourself and your friends right now! Take some "me time," enjoy it and good things will come

 

[luv2nascar]

Oh to be young and single again. Just day dreaming. Seriously enjoy it. Those are the years to date and do everything you won't do again forever. I love being married but am so glad I was not married at 22. Really live a little. Everyone should have to live on their own before getting married. I married just shy of 27 and had my first daughter right away - second daughter followed at 35. I'm currently getting close to 38 (way to close to 40 if you ask me). Have fun and do everything you think you might want to do. I'm not saying you don't do stuff when you're married or have kids but heck let's face it our priorities are different.

 

[outstandinfarmer]

Once again, anyone see a need for a singles area on the Dis?

 

[MidNite]

Once again, anyone see a need for a singles area on the Dis?

That would be a great idea. There's also...ehem...well...another site until then.


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