Why would you choose not to be an organ donor?

[kaytieeldr]

They need a family witness as they take body parts.

Thanks for that information. I'm healthy (well, relatively) but I'm giving my sister medical power of attorney. But I'm going to demand that my brother - the one who already said he'd tell doctors not to take extraordinary measures to save my life - be the one that sits by while they take me apart!

 

[kaytieeldr]

They can have anything of mine they want! I won't need it where I'm going!

I'll be saving you a seat (well, whatever bits of me make it there )

 

[lillygator]

The word "HARVEST" is ugh and yuck????? Imagine someone you love being stricken with a terminal illness and the only way to save them is to "HARVEST" an organ of another who has perished. WHAT WOULD YOU DO?? SAY....OH... HARVEST?? EWWW....

remove comes to mind.

harvest brings something different to the table.


eta, and they aren't exactly "perished", if we could harvest organs from dead people, imagine what could be done....what if your loved one was the one being HARVEST'ED? EWWW huh? Geez.....

 

[kaytieeldr]

No one here has mentioned the far more probable reality. How about the opposite of "I will receive but I won't donate"?. How about what many of us face - "They want me to donate, but I can never receive?"

Respectfully - once I'm dead, I won't care. My brother was on dialysis for years due to kidney failure. With NO insurance he given the opportunity for a tranplant two or three times; due to the condition that caused the kidney failure, he felt it would simply kill the new kidney - so he repeatedly refused.

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

Very very late on August 20th 1995 a young man died suddenly in an accident in NYC. The same time I went into labor and delivered my son on the 21st at noon. At the same time my father was reborn with a heart transplant. In October of the same year he would have been too old for the transplant. He lived for 10 years and the bond between my son and my father was indescribable. They are forever soul mates. My dad would have never known my son without the transplant.

My dad died because of the complications of the drugs and the after affects of the transplant, but in death, even with his body plagued with drugs and severe kidney failure, we were still able to donate his cornea's and a few other non-vital organs. And in her grief, a young woman came to the room and cried with my mom and thanked her, and put in her hands this poem...

“To Remember Me”

The day will come when my body will lie upon a white sheet neatly tucked under four corners of a mattress located in a hospital busily occupied with the living and dying. At a certain moment a doctor will determine that my brain has ceased to function and that, for all intents and purposes, my life has stopped.

When that happens, do not attempt to instill artificial life into my body by the use of a machine. And don’t call this my deathbed. Let it be called the “Bed of Life,”, and let my body be taken from it to help others lead fuller lives. Give my sight to the man who has never seen a sunrise, a baby’s face or love in the eyes of a woman. Give my blood to the teenager who was pulled from the wreckage of his car, so that he might live to see his grandchildren play. Give my kidneys to the one who depends on a machine to exist from week to week. Take my bones, every muscle, every fiber and nerve in my body and find a way to make a crippled child walk. Explore every corner of my brain. Take my cells, if necessary, and let them grow so that someday, a speechless boy will shout at the crack of a bat and a deaf girl will hear the sound of rain against her window. Burn what is left of me and scatter the ashes to the wind to help the flowers grow. If you must bury something, let it by my faults, my weaknesses and all prejudice against my fellow man.

Give my sins to the devil. Give my soul to God. If, by chance you wish to remember me, do it with a kind deed or word to someone who needs you. If you do all I have asked, I will live forever.

Robert N. Test

The poem is forever in my heart and in my home. I am proudly an organ donor.

 

[lillygator]

Wow...... I can't believe how selfish and close minded some people are on here!!! I would not be alive if it weren't for someone who donated their organs. I recieved a heart transplant 9 years ago from a 12 year old boy who commited suicide via a gunshot wound to the head. It was obvious in his case that he was brain dead...does that mean he should be kept alive on a machine until his heart stopped beating?? Some comments I am hearing about this is just mind blowing and ignorant.

I am not trying to start a debate or anything. I am just defending something that is near and dear to my heart. I was diagonosed at 23 years old with a fatal heart defect. I was given 3 months to live. The night before my transplant, the doctors had to tell my family that I was going to die because of the shortage of donors that matched. Fortunately, the next night, they had found a donor heart that matched and I was given a second chance at life.

so fortunately, in your case, oh never mind.

 

[bumbershoot]

I used to be a donor. Now I'm not. Somewhere in between I just started having problems with it, and decided that while I work it out, it would probably be best for me to not be one.

I even have a friend who had a liver transplant almost exactly a year ago. We talked about all this a few years back, and obviously she thinks I'm wrong, but hasn't ever gotten on my case about it.

And her liver transplant...that's some HEAVY stuff. Two people came in one night (separately, I believe) who were donors...next morning she got The Call (it was her very first Call, which is really unusual...they call in several possible matches and you are almost never good to go on the first time). The surgeons were operating for upwards of 48 hours with all of the transplants from those people. One poor guy...he had a live-donor kidney transplant scheduled and was bumped...and then the donor nearly died from complications and it was a huge drama happening every time we were in the hallways...it was quite a time...

My friend knows that someone died so that she could hope to have a longer life (she was diagnosed with chronic idiopathic autoimmune hepatitis when she was around 13 and knew from that time that this was in her future)...it's a serious burden to bear. It's not all happy joy and light. When someone who hadn't thought about it ONLY said the positive stuff, being overjoyed she was doing so well, etc, it really bothered her. Someone died, and that's a big deal.

Anyway, I'm still working it through. I have almost no religious beliefs, but it still bothers me. And I'm not totally sure I would take a donated part, either, so at least I'm not a hypocrite (knock wood I never have to make the decision no matter what or if I decide!).


This is NOT something to "sound bite". This is NOT something to be debated (not just with me, but with anyone). This is a DEEPLY PERSONAL decision, on either side. No one should be bullied into such a decision, either way.

 

[bumbershoot]

I have minimal health insurance, and there is no way in hades I would ever be a candidate for an organ transplant. I can't even get strep throat taken care of for under $500. There is no way I would ever receive all the medical care necessary that would lead to an transplant. If you can't pay, it probably makes the trip to the transplant table pretty difficult!

You bring up an incredibly good point. My friend had to prove, at every step of the way, that she had most excellent insurance AND a support team AND a care team. They (University of Washington Medical Center transplant program) were NOT going to give her a liver, only to find that she couldn't afford the drugs and aftercare she would need.

Though, honestly, in her case, the drugs she's taking now are fewer in number and lower in dosage than they were before...I'm sure that doesn't happen often though!

She would love to go be a free spirit and roam the world, but she *has to* keep that incredible gov't insurance (she's a city planner) she has, so that she can get the thousands of dollars worth of drugs every single month so that she doesn't reject her liver.

However...strep throat...$500? We were still paying on DS and my deductibles and DS got strep...went to a local naturopathy clinic. $129 for the visit, under $20 for the strep test, $17.99 for some bloodwork, and then the antibiotics would have been $60. We paid OOP for the antibiotics b/c I went to a Compounding Pharmacy, because it was the only way I could think of to not get an animal-based capsule. (now I realize i should have gotten the pills with the copay at Walgreens (they say they do Compounding, but they don't, not really), then paid the other pharmacist a few bucks to change out the capsules, but I was sick too and wasn't thinking) Those were the rates charged to our insurance (it wasn't what our insurance brought the inflated charges down to, but the actual charges) and that's what we paid, as it was towards the deductible.

So you might be seeing the wrong docs! Hope you can find someplace that charges lower for things like that....

With NO insurance he given the opportunity for a tranplant two or three times; due to the condition that caused the kidney failure, he felt it would simply kill the new kidney - so he repeatedly refused.

That is *shocking* that he was offered to go on the list. Shocking. Absolutely completely different from what the program out here is like (yes, different organ, but they do kidneys, too).

I'd like to donate my body to science when I die, but I don't know that any med schools would take it since I have had so many surgeries for my crohn's disease, and am looking forward to having my abdomen totally rebuilt this fall because of a massive hernia from resulted from the multiple abdominal surgeries. I figure they don't want bodies that have been modified so much since it won't let the med students know what "normal" is supposed to look like.

Since we are speaking openly, FWIW, while in chiropractic school I had the opportunity to work on and learn from a deceased woman who, it turned out, had had many many MANY surgeries. Because of the way our courses worked, we learned from the same person for three quarters of one year. And she was like a mystery. We found staples inside her skull, near her heart...she was missing some organs...it was absolutely fascinating. We learned SO much from her.

So maybe it's different from school to school, program to program (though our anatomy prof used to work at the semi-local medical school, and he said they used the same program for anatomy classes at both schools), but perhaps you could see if there is a chiro school in your area, call up their Anatomy profs, and find out what program they use?

 

[bumbershoot]

It bothers people because so many have been faced with a friend or loved one having fatal organ failure, and waiting for a compatible organ to come along. If everyone who died opted to donate their organs (of course medically acceptable organs) this wouldn't happen.

There's just no way to prove that. Even if everyone around you dropped dead and donated their organs doesn't mean ANY of them would be a match to you. Heck, you might be sick that day, and unable to accept a donation (like what often happens, at least with liver transplants), no matter how good the match was. Would it be more likely? Sure. Is it an absolute? It simply cannot be.

My mom refuses to be a donor. I've told her that if the decision is up to me, she will be one.

oh, if I was mom, I would certainly have something drawn up reliquishing you of any say.

I would too. Going against someone's wishes is beyond vile.

i have horrible eyesight, i wouldn't want anyone to have to use my eyes lol

OK, well, it's not your whole EYE that is donated. It's the cornea. If you've ever watched a Lasik procedure, it's like that, but total (not just a flap), from the donor, and then that is put on the recipient (who has had their cornea taken off in preparation).

Obviously I'm cool with people saying "it's not for me", but I would hate to think that you really thought your entire eye would be used, and your vision problems would be passed on.

Would you refuse an organ for your child if they needed one?

That is absolutely moot. If someone even tried to refuse a donation, their parental rights would be terminated, at least temporarily, and it would be done anyway. I hate that it happens (I'm not a big believer in the whole medical thing, and can't stand that the gov't can step in when they disagree with healthcare decisions), but I'm sure it would. So it's entirely moot and just an emotional question that doesn't even need to be asked or answered, at least not in the US with its AMA-loving gov't.

I would be more than willing (providing I had anything left that was still able to be used) - but for some reason my one adult DD has a problem with my doing so.. Every now and then I bring it up and try to sway her opinion, but so far no luck..

Just like I think it's vile that someone would donate when the donor doesn't want that, I think it's awful that your daughter wouldn't do it when you want to. Can you put someone else as the decision-maker for this?

It's your license...I don't think she has a say in what you can put on it.

She is my wife - if I love her, she has a say.

Bama, I think I've mentioned my appreciation for what you've posted about your relationship before, but if not, I do appreciate that. It's really kind of you to listen to her for the time she objected. It's an incredibly emotional thing, and it just shows how precious you think she is, that you would let her have a say in this.

I would love to donate blood but I cannot because of a long standing prejudice to men who sleep with men.

That really did come out wrong, there...if I hadn't known better, I would have thought YOU had the prejudice.

I'm an organ donor but dh isn't. It's a hot topic discussion at our house and one we've decided to agree to disagree.....or kill each other. In which case I will have his organs donated

Thumbs down at that....

 

[Mermaid02]

Wow...... I can't believe how selfish and close minded some people are on here!!! I would not be alive if it weren't for someone who donated their organs. I recieved a heart transplant 9 years ago from a 12 year old boy who commited suicide via a gunshot wound to the head. It was obvious in his case that he was brain dead...does that mean he should be kept alive on a machine until his heart stopped beating?? Some comments I am hearing about this is just mind blowing and ignorant.

I am not trying to start a debate or anything. I am just defending something that is near and dear to my heart. I was diagonosed at 23 years old with a fatal heart defect. I was given 3 months to live. The night before my transplant, the doctors had to tell my family that I was going to die because of the shortage of donors that matched. Fortunately, the next night, they had found a donor heart that matched and I was given a second chance at life.

I am in contact with the Father of "MY HERO". He is comforted by the fact that his SON saved 7 other peoples lives that night. With such a tragic situation, something good came out of it!!! I would be a DONOR in a heart beat!! The past 9 years, I have seen babies born, dreams made, graduations ,weddings, and lost time FOUND by the MANY people associated with Organ and Tissue Donation.

If some people who oppose organ donation could walk a mile in my shoes, they would see the joy and happiness that a person feels when they are given a second chance at life... I am almost certain that they would become donors afterwards.....

This is why I would donate my organs. Harvest away and then cremate me.

 

[nmmom95]

I am not an organ donor, and feel very strongly on this.

There is no way I would ever receive all the medical care necessary that would lead to an transplant. If you can't pay, it probably makes the trip to the transplant table pretty difficult! It's unrealistic to think I would ever get a transplant - I would instead receive what minimal care and alternatives I could pay for.

No one really cares about the inequality there - just too bad for the less-insured person I guess. Class, status, wealth, insurance - it all plays into organ donation, and it's hard to ignore.

That is not true. Actually, (I can only speak for kidney failure) you become eligible for Medicare after 3 months on dialysis. Also, there is a fund to cover other expenses that you can apply for. I have good insurance, and they will drop me after 33 months, because they can. At that point, I will also have Medicare. Age is not a requirement for this. I am only 40. Your reasons are your business, but please do not give out incorrect information.

 

[teskak]

Well here is one to add to the controversy. In Australia we have universal healthcare (but that is another story)

A young woman who had 2 children was also a heroin addict. Her liver failed due to drug use, and while she was probably clean at the time she went onto the organ transplant list and recieved a donor liver. For whatever reason (she says it was 'stress' and inadequate follow up by the hospital) she relapsed onto heroin. Her replacement liver started to fail not long after that.

She was refused a place on the transplant list as the surgical requirements is that they will not operate on somebody who is not clean from the drugs or alcohol. So her family went to the media with the classic photos of mum with sad eyes and adoring children etc. The government has now lent her family $250,000 to pay for her to go to Singapore and have a live donor transplant from a relative. She was operated on last week and so far both the donor & recipient are still alive.

But it is a major debate at the moment...

 

[johnsontrio]

You bring up an incredibly good point. My friend had to prove, at every step of the way, that she had most excellent insurance AND a support team AND a care team. They (University of Washington Medical Center transplant program) were NOT going to give her a liver, only to find that she couldn't afford the drugs and aftercare she would need.

Though, honestly, in her case, the drugs she's taking now are fewer in number and lower in dosage than they were before...I'm sure that doesn't happen often though!

She would love to go be a free spirit and roam the world, but she *has to* keep that incredible gov't insurance (she's a city planner) she has, so that she can get the thousands of dollars worth of drugs every single month so that she doesn't reject her liver.

However...strep throat...$500? We were still paying on DS and my deductibles and DS got strep...went to a local naturopathy clinic. $129 for the visit, under $20 for the strep test, $17.99 for some bloodwork, and then the antibiotics would have been $60. We paid OOP for the antibiotics b/c I went to a Compounding Pharmacy, because it was the only way I could think of to not get an animal-based capsule. (now I realize i should have gotten the pills with the copay at Walgreens (they say they do Compounding, but they don't, not really), then paid the other pharmacist a few bucks to change out the capsules, but I was sick too and wasn't thinking) Those were the rates charged to our insurance (it wasn't what our insurance brought the inflated charges down to, but the actual charges) and that's what we paid, as it was towards the deductible.

So you might be seeing the wrong docs! Hope you can find someplace that charges lower for things like that....



That is *shocking* that he was offered to go on the list. Shocking. Absolutely completely different from what the program out here is like (yes, different organ, but they do kidneys, too).



Since we are speaking openly, FWIW, while in chiropractic school I had the opportunity to work on and learn from a deceased woman who, it turned out, had had many many MANY surgeries. Because of the way our courses worked, we learned from the same person for three quarters of one year. And she was like a mystery. We found staples inside her skull, near her heart...she was missing some organs...it was absolutely fascinating. We learned SO much from her.

So maybe it's different from school to school, program to program (though our anatomy prof used to work at the semi-local medical school, and he said they used the same program for anatomy classes at both schools), but perhaps you could see if there is a chiro school in your area, call up their Anatomy profs, and find out what program they use?

Not trying to hijack this thread but this is the first time I've ever heard this. What is this about? Is it because you're vegan or something or is it a medical issue or allergy? Just wondering.

 

[luvmy3]

Wow! I certainly knew that there were many people who wouldn't donate their own organs, but I'm absolutely floored that those same people would take what they weren't willing to give. That is indeed selfish, straight out of the dictionary.

I guess I think the exact opposite of you. That its human instinct to give. That its human to want to take care of those around you.

Giving is a learned behavior, preserving (your) life is instinct, one that is shared by all animals. I would do whatever it took to save my own life or the life of my children. I would not do the same for a stranger. I see the debate about organ donating the same, a person in need will do what it takes to survive, or save their child, but that doesn't mean they will do what it takes to save someone else. I can't consider that selfish if I don't consider what I would/wouldn't do either.
After reading some of these posts I have to wonder if some of the pp's were given the choice as a donor would they refuse to give their organs to someone who wasn't? I'm sad to say that I think they would, at least that is the impression I get and I guess that is a million times worse than being selfish.

 

[NikitaZee]

This is NOT something to "sound bite". This is NOT something to be debated (not just with me, but with anyone). This is a DEEPLY PERSONAL decision, on either side. No one should be bullied into such a decision, either way.

Absolutely true. I think it's really awful to keep hearing terms such as selfish and close minded when it comes to this issue. I've no wish to debate the merits of being an organ donor with anyone who is the recipient of a donated organ or knows someone who has been. There's really no way to remain objective on the issue when it's so close to your heart - but that doesn't make anyone's decision to donate or not donate any less valid, and it certainly doesn't make them a selfish or close minded person. How do you know that the person who chooses not to donate hasn't spent a lifetime helping others? Is this really the benchmark some folks here would use to judge by?

 

[merryweather20]

Giving is a learned behavior, preserving (your) life is instinct, one that is shared by all animals. I would do whatever it took to save my own life or the life of my children. I would not do the same for a stranger. I see the debate about organ donating the same, a person in need will do what it takes to survive, or save their child, but that doesn't mean they will do what it takes to save someone else. I can't consider that selfish if I don't consider what I would/wouldn't do either.
After reading some of these posts I have to wonder if some of the pp's were given the choice as a donor would they refuse to give their organs to someone who wasn't? I'm sad to say that I think they would, at least that is the impression I get and I guess that is a million times worse than being selfish.

How? They are being human. They are willing to give, and you aren't, at all, to anyone.

 

[luvmy3]

How? They are being human. They are willing to give, and you aren't, at all, to anyone.

Actually I am, I am an organ donor

Since you asked though, I will answer although you seemed to ignore the part about choosing who you would donate to. When I checked yes at the DMV it was with zero stipulations. If I said "sorry I will only donate to those who have agreed to donate themselves" or if I was dying and in my last breath I said to my family "don't let anyone have my organs if they weren't willing to give their own" that would make me vindictive, vengeful, spiteful etc. Traits far worse than selfishness IMO.

 

[Mermaid02]

Giving is a learned behavior, preserving (your) life is instinct, one that is shared by all animals. I would do whatever it took to save my own life or the life of my children. I would not do the same for a stranger. I see the debate about organ donating the same, a person in need will do what it takes to survive, or save their child, but that doesn't mean they will do what it takes to save someone else. I can't consider that selfish if I don't consider what I would/wouldn't do either.
After reading some of these posts I have to wonder if some of the pp's were given the choice as a donor would they refuse to give their organs to someone who wasn't? I'm sad to say that I think they would, at least that is the impression I get and I guess that is a million times worse than being selfish.

I would want my organs to go to the person who has the BEST chance of recovering and leading a good life. I don't care if the recipient would be an organ donor or not- I have a feeling that after receiving a second chance they and their family just might change their minds about donation. Not sure about donation to inmates though. I sure don't want to donate to a convicted murderer ahead of someone else.

 

[krcit]

Absolutely true. I think it's really awful to keep hearing terms such as selfish and close minded when it comes to this issue. I've no wish to debate the merits of being an organ donor with anyone who is the recipient of a donated organ or knows someone who has been. There's really no way to remain objective on the issue when it's so close to your heart - but that doesn't make anyone's decision to donate or not donate any less valid, and it certainly doesn't make them a selfish or close minded person. How do you know that the person who chooses not to donate hasn't spent a lifetime helping others? Is this really the benchmark some folks here would use to judge by?

I agree. I think you were getting picked on for being honest. I have made my wishes known that if possible I would like to be an organ donor. I used to say anything but my eyes..I don't know why but it freaked me out. I have since become ok with donating my eyes but I would never judge anyone who wouldn't donate theirs or anything else. It is highly personal decision. It is also difficult for the family of the donor at least in the instance of my friends sister. She was declared brain dead at 10 am, family decided to donate her organs so test after test was started to check the viabilty of her organs. At midnight, the family said 'no more' They couldn't take sitting with their daughter waiting for the organs to be harvested any longer so they told them to take what they could now and not wait on anymore tests. Does that make them selfish? I think not.

 

[NikitaZee]

I agree. I think you were getting picked on for being honest. I have made my wishes known that if possible I would like to be an organ donor. I used to say anything but my eyes..I don't know why but it freaked me out. I have since become ok with donating my eyes but I would never judge anyone who wouldn't donate theirs or anything else. It is highly personal decision. It is also difficult for the family of the donor at least in the instance of my friends sister. She was declared brain dead at 10 am, family decided to donate her organs so test after test was started to check the viabilty of her organs. At midnight, the family said 'no more' They couldn't take sitting with their daughter waiting for the organs to be harvested any longer so they told them to take what they could now and not wait on anymore tests. Does that make them selfish? I think not.

Thanks. BTW - born and raised in Freeport, NY