Why would anyone do this to another human being?

[Lanshark]

I think you are trivializing the word "Prank". A prank can have malicious intent, be dangerous, have serious consequences, etc. This had all three and more. Clearly they weren't "joking around" with him, nor did they expect that he would think it was "funny", I just don't think that they expected he would kill himself.

What do you think they thought the outcome would be?

 

[DawnCt1]

What do you think they thought the outcome would be?

Humiliation, shame, embarrassment, anger. I don't think that most people would consider suicide in that equation. Their 'goals" were certainly not laudable. I think what they did is despicable, but it wasn't murder. Again, why no anger at the adults in the school that he reached out to? That really surprises me.

 

[luvmy3]

Nope--I am in now way trying to stir the pot and OF COURSE I see the difference between rape and a prank. I feel you must too which is why I am trying very hard to understand what it is about THIS story that makes it merely a prank to you and not a serious crime. So far you have not been able to really define that in any way that would not by extension make other various crimes (like rape) also possible pranks. Basically, I am trying to understand in what light you (and a couple of other posters) see this crime because it has really not been made clear. I am sorry if you think being pressed to explain is stirring the pot--it isn't. I just truly like knowing where other people are coming from and trying to understand their points of view.

You know what, I just had a huge response all typed out but I had taken so long to write it that I had to re-log in and when I did it said something about the submission can't be processed because I logged in before the page loaded Anywoo, I went back and its all gone

Here's the shortened version.
First lets be clear because I never said that what these kids did wasn't serious.

Now, onto why you seem to be confused, I will re-word my definition of a prank and won't use the word trick. A prank is something that is done for the purpose of laughing at or with someone, it could be practical joke, it could be a cruel trick like in Tyler's case. (That is what I meant by enjoyment). Now, I'm sure you are aware that a rapist does not rape their victims in order to get a laugh or embarass them, which is why I didn't feel I had to explain why raping someone could never be considered a prank. Having said that, do I believe a prank can result in a serious crime, of course but that does not mean that every crime can be described as a prank.
I had an example in my lengthy long winded response, but I'm really tired of typing so I hope that this better explains my position.

 

[sparklynails23]

Boys secretly tape themselves having sex with girls a lot. My guess is that no one would feel nearly as sorry for some sorority girl who went to a guy's room for a one night stand and was humiliated when it was secretly broadcast to the public. These invasions of privacy should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law no matter who is involved and what their sexual preference might be, and the owners of websites that post these videos should be held responsible, as well.

This poor guy looks like he was a very nice kid. His family must be devastated.

 

[FergieTCat]

The maximum penalty that is allowed by law. I for one would like them to serve some time behind bars. I think that piling on charges that are inappropriate or will never stick will result in nothing.
Again, why isn't there any anger towards the school who essentially ignored him when he asked for help?

I think the school bears some of the responsibility as well, especially since the incident happened on their campus.

 

[DawnCt1]

I think the school bears some of the responsibility as well, especially since the incident happened on their campus.

Not necessarily because it happened on their campus because they cannot monitor or prevent that sort of thing. Apparently the RA, which is usually just another student did take him seriously. I found these passages interesting. From the text Tyler doesn't seem particularly angry, which I don't quite understand. Perhaps he didn't discover the extent of the broadcast until the moment he jumped.

The day before jumping off the bridge, a person believed to be Clementi logged onto the chat room Justusboys.com’s under an alias. There he documented his situation, saying “I’m kinda pissed at him,” in regards to his roommate. “It would be nice to get him into trouble … I feel like the only thing the school might do is find me another roommate … and I’d probably just end up with somebody worse than him.”

“I mean aside from being an a–––e from time to time, he’s a pretty decent roommate.”

In another post: “the fact that the people he was with saw my making out with a guy as the scandal, whereas I mean come on…he was SPYING ON ME…do they see something wrong with this?” And another: “Revenge never ends well for me. As much as I would love to pour pink paint all over his stuff … that would just let him win.”

On the day of his death Tyler write this: "So I wanted to have the guy over again. I texted roomie around 7 asking for the room later tonite and he said it was fine. When I got back to the room, I instantly noticed he had turned the webcam toward my bed and he had posted online again … saying…’Anyone want a free show just video chat with me tonight.’ "

Tyler then went to an RA in his dorm and later wrote that they took his concerns seriously. “He asked me to email him a written paragraph about exactly what happened. I emailed it to him and to two people above him.”

But Tyler didn’t wait for action to be taken. Instead he jumped off the bridge. The school was by the looks of it going to act when they had reviewed his complaint. Should they have acted faster? I don;t think so. Unless they had some way to know this was a dire emergency, they seemed to be looking into it.

 

[goofy4tink]

You know...I don't much care what they are taping....two guys, two girls, a guy and a girl, a threesome, whatever....that was wrong. It isn't cute, it isn't funny. So...do we all think it was a 'prank' when that guy taped the female sportscaster while she was in her hotel room?? Did everyone think that was merely 'invasion of privacy'?

I'm sorry...but it was a hate crime....sure they were bullies and were trying to humiliate and embarrass those poor guys. But they were wrong. They caused someone to feel to defeated and badly that he jumped off a bridge. In what lifetime is that okay? And don't get me started on the school. I, for one, have had it with people saying 'oh, kids will be kids. they don't mean any harm by it. so and so is just being overly sensitive. they need to toughen up.' Yes, that is exactly what schools tend to say. We are losing young people way too fast here. What possible interest could one young person have in another young person's private life??? What in God's name would possess someone to videotape this type thing??? People need to understand the whole idea of action...reaction. They need to understand that there are consequences to their actions. I am tired of hearing that they are young and weren't really trying to hurt anyone.

Of course, this whole tragedy has opened up a lot of conversations with teens I suppose. I know that I have had some very interesting discussions with my soon to be 17 y/o dd about this very thing. I have told her to put herself in someone else's shoes before she acts. These kids need to learn empathy...something they are incredibly short on.

 

[Lanshark]

How long before his suicide did he contact the school and who exactly did he contact besides the RA and two (who) people above him?

The school definitely has some responsibility. We need to acknowledge the existence of cyber bullying and address it in a serious manner.

 

[allison443]

I think the school bears some of the responsibility as well, especially since the incident happened on their campus.

This whole thing is despicable.
However, to say the school is responsible just because it happened on the school's property? Come on. How could the school prevent this from happening?

I don't think enough is known about what the school did/didn't do. It sounds like Tyler started the complaint process to his RA and it sounds like he spoke to the RA. I don't think we can say the school ignored his complaints, is it possible of course but we don't know that, yet. Rutgers hasn't released any info about what transpired there.

Also I have read quite a few articles and we don't know who contacted the police. We don't know if it was Tyler himeself, the RA, the school, or another student. Rutgers police were involved as well as regular police. I just don't think we know enough to say that the school failed him. It's possible they did, possible they didn't.

Also Tyler disappeared a few days before this incident was made public (the day of the arrests). So it's not clear who contacted the police..maybe when he disappeared someone made the connection?

So sad for his family, cannot imagine what they are going through now.

 

[DawnCt1]

How long before his suicide did he contact the school and who exactly did he contact besides the RA and two (who) people above him?

The school definitely has some responsibility. We need to acknowledge the existence of cyber bullying and address it in a serious manner.

His own email seems to indicate that he was taken seriously. We don't know the amount of detail he shared with them. Two people above? Was it still in the realm of "Residence Life"? Don't know.

 

[Ciao Mickey]

I think the school bears some of the responsibility as well, especially since the incident happened on their campus.

Why should the school bear any responsibility in this matter?

What would happen if two strangers came on your property and one shoots and kills the other. Would you want to be held responsible in any way simply because the shooting took place on your property?

The only thing Rutgers must do is expel the two students and let the courts take care of the rest.

Place the blame where it belongs-- on Ravi and Wei, not on Rutgers.

 

[FergieTCat]

Why should the school bear any responsibility in this matter?

What would happen if two strangers came on your property and one shoots and kills the other. Would you want to be held responsible in any way simply because the shooting took place on your property?

The only thing Rutgers must do is expel the two students and let the courts take care of the rest.

Place the blame where it belongs-- on Ravi and Wei, not on Rutgers.

So Rutgers has absolutely no responsibility in protecting their students while they are living in on-campus housing? Maybe Rutgers should reconsider their claim that they "Ensure a Safe Campus Environment." http://www.rutgers.edu/campus-life/campus-safety

 

[FergieTCat]

Not necessarily because it happened on their campus because they cannot monitor or prevent that sort of thing. Apparently the RA, which is usually just another student did take him seriously. I found these passages interesting. From the text Tyler doesn't seem particularly angry, which I don't quite understand. Perhaps he didn't discover the extent of the broadcast until the moment he jumped.

So your statement from your previous post "On the other hand, where is the outrage at the school authorities that ignored his pleas for help. When the inmates run the asylum, where are the adults?" was rhetorical?

 

[DawnCt1]

So your statement from your previous post "On the other hand, where is the outrage at the school authorities that ignored his pleas for help. When the inmates run the asylum, where are the adults?" was rhetorical?

The initial reports that I had heard were that he went to school officials for help and received none. The updated report that I found indicated that he gave them a very short window of time to help him. I think that timing makes all of the difference, don't you? The tone of his emails were not of an urgent, upset nature. If two or three days went by and no one addressed his concerns, that would have been at the least, a poor response. It seems that that was not the case.

 

[DawnCt1]

So Rutgers has absolutely no responsibility in protecting their students while they are living in on-campus housing? Maybe Rutgers should reconsider their claim that they "Ensure a Safe Campus Environment." http://www.rutgers.edu/campus-life/campus-safety

And how exactly would you suggest they could have prevented what happened within a dorm room?

 

[sunnyday123]

what purpose does a web cam serve in a dorm room? would it be used for school purposes?

 

[allison443]

what purpose does a web cam serve in a dorm room? would it be used for school purposes?

I think webcams are standard on most laptops now...people use them when they talk to each other online. That's what my dd uses her for anyway. Having a webcam doesn't mean it's automatically going to be used for some nefarious purpose like it was here.

 

[allison443]

So Rutgers has absolutely no responsibility in protecting their students while they are living in on-campus housing? Maybe Rutgers should reconsider their claim that they "Ensure a Safe Campus Environment." http://www.rutgers.edu/campus-life/campus-safety

That's a little far-fetched, don't you think?

Are you saying Rutgers should have prevented the initial webcam broadcast? How could they have done that? I would like to know if there is something I am not thinking of?

 

[Ciao Mickey]

So Rutgers has absolutely no responsibility in protecting their students while they are living in on-campus housing? Maybe Rutgers should reconsider their claim that they "Ensure a Safe Campus Environment." http://www.rutgers.edu/campus-life/campus-safety

You are kidding right?

How do you suppose they do that in this particular situation? They are a university not a day care center. The *kids* are considered adults you know and adults are responsible for their own actions.

Both of my kids graduated from Rutgers in New Brunswick and lived on campus. The school is as safe as a school can be today.

Again, you are placing the blame on the wrong party, ie, Rutgers. Rutgers can't control what every single student will do behind closed doors.

I really feel sorry for Tyler and his family. But there had to be something else going on in that kid's life that sent him over the edge like that. What kind of upbringing did he have that would lead him to end his life? Should we blame his parents for raising a weak kid?

I also wonder about the other two families that produced kids that would do what they did. Should we blame those parents for raising little monsters with no conscious?

I mean, why stop at blaming Rutgers? Might as well spread the blame around.

Should we all blame ourselves? Without people watching reality shows, Youtube, etc. you wouldn't have a generation of (screwed up) kids growing up thinking that putting your life on the web is the norm.

 

[FergieTCat]

I'm wrong. Whatever. Mea culpa.