Why does no one cook at home anymore?

[WDWLVR]

I work full time as does my DH. I cook either 5-6 meals a week. Nothing really fancy - that just isn't us. Basic foods that will usually give my DH something to take for lunch the next day as well. Friday night is usally pizza night and sometimes on a Saturday we'll stop by a casual dining place or bring home chicken etc. The other nights of the week I cook.

 

[missypie]

I am the OP and last night I had a meeting after work. Here is what DH fed the kids: Lunchables.

 

[Christine]

Missypie,
I think you need to trade him in!

 

[Miss Jasmine]

Originally posted by missypie
I am the OP and last night I had a meeting after work. Here is what DH fed the kids: Lunchables.

Those are the very worst food on this planet.

We don't have full-time kids, but DH and I eat in almost every night (take out on Friday). DH cooks during the week (he is off Monday and Tuesday and gets home earlier than me the other weekdays) and I cook on the weekends. Weekday meals are usually simple...lean meat, side and veggie (trying to not use many conveniece foods, which is not hard since there aren't many we can use since we have rid our diets of partially hydrogenanted and hydrogenated oils). On the weekend, I tend to make more elaborate meals, but I like to cook. There is no reason he should be feeding the kids lunchables.

No wonder there is a problem in this country with obesity and poor eating habits. Convenience may be easy now, but chances are people will be paying in the end.

 

[Lewski709]

I do, but after working 10hrs and getting my children from daycare and only getting to spend a couple hrs with them before they go to bed, we do order out often too. It's time and lack of for family. Cooking takes more time and the kids are too small to be around (safety) or to help. DH doesn't cook.

 

[Cruise04]

I work full time and am a full time volunteer (well compulsive is how people describe me). But no matter what time we have to leave and be somewhere - there is usually at least 30-60 minutes to make something, sit down at the table and eat as a family. That is very important to me. We eat out or order out once, sometimes twice a week for a variety. My husband has diabetes and so we've learned to cook better and learned what he can eat out and where. It surprising once you learn how to eat and what you can and cannot eat that there is plenty of quick variety out there without it having to be McD's, Burger King, KFC, etc. Some nights we have baked chicken and veggie and a side; some nights we have frozen pizza from Market Day (fits into his food plan nicely and we also love pizza); some nights it's frozen chicken from Market Day and some nights it's fresh chicken (we eat a lot of chicken). But the main thing is that we eat together in our home! We purchase convenience things to cook that fall into my husband's meal plan for the nights we have to be out of the house quick and the nights that we have time at home - I cook a more elaborate meal. I don't do many crock pot foods but I've learned to make things that don't take a lot of time and that are very nutritious. And I can't wait til we can get the grill started again - oh and George Foreman has become my new best friend!

 

[danacara]

Cooking is in many ways a lost art, especially among my generation. What we see now is an extension of the McDonalds phenomena that came to be in the 1970s and 1980s - when convenient, quick food became as inexpensive as home-cooked. Now, even mid-tier food - diners, more upscale fast food places, salad and soup restaurants - are economically competitive with home-cooked. There's also an increasingly strong bent toward luxury items (lots of interesting books coming out nowadays on this topic). Americans are moving into luxury and brands as entitlements unrestricted by class bounds. Finally, the fact that you can buy takeout nowadays on credit is having an impact. Remember 10 years ago, when you couldn't use your credit card at the supermarket? Think of how the world has changed, and how access to the world's luxuries has changed with it...

 

[Christine]

A lot of these so called "healthy" convenience food have come a long way over McD's, BKs, Wendy's, etc. But, more often than night, what they are lacking in fat they make up for with sodium. I do realize there are some healthy options, but let's face it, Missypie's DH does not seem to be using these.

Also, I think a Lunchable, hot dog, hamburger, etc., (and that wonderful food called PIZZA) are perfectly acceptable ONCE IN A WHILE--it's the steady diet.

And yes, you CAN make a healthy meal extremely fast. You can cook a salmon filet in a George Foreman grill in 7 minutes. Steamed white rice takes 2 minutes to pop in the steamer and is done in 15 minutes. Frozen or fresh veggies--another 5-20 minutes. The problem with the healthy meals is that they are bland and uninteresting compared to what the American palate has become used to with the high sodium/sugar/seasoned content of the foods we've become accustomed to. Nobody wants to take the time make those things anymore. The "Campbell's Cream of Mushroom Soup" generation can't eat plain food anymore! (Sorry--cream of mushroom soup is a pet peeve of mine).

As far as not having time, you just have squeeze it in, especially if you DO have children. I am out of my house from 6:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. (10 hours). My kids don't help me cook because I am moving at "warp speed" when I do. But they are sitting there, at the breakfast table, right near me, doing their homework while I cook. We are talking the whole time and I'm helping with the homework. When they were babies I used to pop them up on the counter in their infant seats while I was cooking (don't worry, I have a very big countertop space and they weren't near the burners ).

Bottom line and I'm really trying NOT to preach is that *I* don't feel good eating a steady diet of convenience foods. Physically, I can feel it the times that I have done that. Intestines feel yucky, I feel sluggish, etc. I'm an adult and I know how I feel on a steady diet of this stuff--I can only imagine what it must do to my kids.

 

[tw1nsmom]

I'm a SAHM and I do cook most nights. There is also no reason to make elaborate meals to provide nutritious food for your family. There are a lot of short-cuts you can use to make meal prep. simple. I also don't like lunchables, but I will give my kids pb&J on whole wheat bread with natural peanut butter.

Having said that though, I think there are a lot of judgemental posts on this thread. If you are providing nutritious home cooked meals for your family every day, I applaud you. However, your way isn't the only way and maybe we should just be satisfied with how we are running our houses instead of criticizing those that don't do just as you do. Also, remember that many of the wives/mothers of long ago were heavy into the martre roll. They didn't feel that their feelings, needs or desires mattered. It didn't matter if they were miserable, lonely, or exhausted. Their house was to be spotless, their meals perfect and a smile on their face whether they liked it or not. I'm happy that today's women have more balance in their lives and I don't begrudge those that put their happiness on the same level of importance as the hapiness of their family. If you enjoy cooking/cleaning that's great, but many don't. Also, the women in the past didn't have to constantly monitor their children. Even when I was a child (I'm 35), my mother could send my brother and I out to play in the yard without fear of kidnapping or harm coming to us. This freed them up to cook and clean without interuption. I can make dinner and make my house immaculate if given 1 1/2 hours to myself...that rarely happens. Today I wouldn't think of sending my children out to play witthout being there to directly supervise, and if an accident was to occur to a child under 11 who wsn't being supervised, the parent could very well be charged with neglect (something similar has happened locally).

Take pride in how you run your household. Provide as many nutritional meals as YOU can. If your SO is not living up to your cooking expectations then find a way to make it work for YOUR family. Know, and be proud of the fact that you are teaching your children, by example, how to make good food choices. Don't assume that you know what is best or what will work for every family out there.

 

[pygmymom]

The eat out/cook in dilemna is so individual for each family, I've found from being on both sides of the fence. When all my kids were little, I did cook, but we also picked up fast food a lot since by 4 o'clock I felt worn out and not ready to head in the kitchen. Once I took on the job of retail store manager and worked at least 60 hours a week, I cooked on Christmas and Easter. My husband cooked simple meals and ordered out since I was never home and I had the only car.

Now, I'm lucky to be home most of the time with my teen girls. We might go out once a week. Otherwise, I cook and we eat together every night. I rotate the same 10 to 15 things and make a menu tacked on the frig. This helps me to plan, and also answers the constant question, "What's for dinner tonight?" I shop sales at the grocery store and make meals with leftovers in mind, such as chicken in the crock pot and using the leftovers for casserole. The "quick cooking" magazines are a wonderful source of recipes. Since I've been at home, my two oldest daughters have slimmed down. No, everything's not super healthy--we make a lot of desserts. But it's better than a continual diet of fast food. Now fast food is a treat. Before, we contributed an outrageous amount of money to that industry. But, in those circumstances, it was necessary.

Every family has to do what works for them. If you're working, you might not have any time or just plain be too tired and not want to face the kitchen. Same thing if you have small children or children in activities. I think another poster said it best--eating together is the most important thing.

Now, the house is another story...

 

[GEM]

Before I actually read all the replies, I was going to say that we cooked quite a bit. But, according to most posters here, I guess we don't. In our house pasta, sauce from a jar, frozen garlic bread, and a salad in a bag is considered a home cooked meal!

 

[missypie]

Gem, that totally counts!!! That beats Lunchables hands down!

 

[leahannpen]

This is an interesting thread. In reading it, I noticed how busy everybody was. And, it's true, what works for one family may not work for another family. Personally, I cook most nights, while working full time. DH also works full time. I'd love to stay home and have more time too make even better meals and keep the house cleaner, but right now that's not an option. I cook and do dishes, while DH clean up left overs and puts them away then plays with DS.

It isn't that hard to cook a quick, healthy meal however. You can make many meals in 30 minutes, which isn't alot of time to invest for your families health and saving money.

My son is only going to be 3 and I do have one on the way, so I can't speak from personal experiance, but it seems like today's children have so much more on their plate (no pun intended! ) as far as after school activites and more homework than when we were kids. All the running around with no time to cook seems to play into that, somewhat. I'm sure I'll find out all about that in a few years!

 

[Lewski709]

Originally posted by leahannpen
This is an interesting thread. In reading it, I noticed how busy everybody was. And, it's true, what works for one family may not work for another family. Personally, I cook most nights, while working full time. DH also works full time. I'd love to stay home and have more time too make even better meals and keep the house cleaner, but right now that's not an option. I cook and do dishes, while DH clean up left overs and puts them away then plays with DS.

It isn't that hard to cook a quick, healthy meal however. You can make many meals in 30 minutes, which isn't alot of time to invest for your families health and saving money.

My son is only going to be 3 and I do have one on the way, so I can't speak from personal experiance, but it seems like today's children have so much more on their plate (no pun intended! ) as far as after school activites and more homework than when we were kids. All the running around with no time to cook seems to play into that, somewhat. I'm sure I'll find out all about that in a few years!

I think you'll find out even sooner, when the new one comes along.

 

[Planogirl]

It's also possible to make a healthier version of many fast foods at home. Very lean ground beef, 2% American cheese and whole wheat bun and you have a cheeseburger. Again the low fat ground beef, lower fat cheese and also low fat tortillas and you have burritos. And so on.

I'm like so many others though in that I hate to cook and I'm also not real good at it. However, I hate to spend a lot of money to eat out too often so I make simple things like stir-fry, roasted or broiled meat, steamed veggies and so on. These things are quick too.

A lot of people have commented on how their Moms used to cook a lot. My mother made fried meats, lots of mashed potatoes, gravy and foods such as these. This wasn't exactly healthy either.

 

[s&k'smom]

Wow this has been an interesting thread. On one hand it's nice to see so many of us eating together with our families. We eat out maybe once a week. My DH works nights so the rule is when daddy is home we eat together at the kitchen table. Otherwise my kids will eat in the tv room. I tend to eat on my own in the kitchen as it is the only time I may get some peace and quiet. Another issue is that we all have very different food taste so some nights I have 3 different meals going. It's funny when we are in WDW it's the only time we eat every meal together because it's the only week we are all together everyday!

 

[missypie]

Years ago someone did a study of a group of National Merit Scholars to see what they all had in common. The only common thread the researchers could find was that their families ate together almost every night. (Pretty scary, huh?)

 

[WilmaBud]

Amen, tw1nsmom! You said what I've been thinking ever since I first read this thread this morning. I don't get why people need to feel "superior" because they cook every night of the week. We eat together as a family almost every night, but we do a lot of take out. So what? Not one of us is fat or unhealthy.

Times are different from when we were kids. We all have tons of activities that take us out of the house at varying times. We do the best we can with the time we've got.

I work parttime, at home. My house is perpetually messy, and we do take-out a few times a week. I'm not lazy, and I'm not a bad mom. My kids are healthy, respectful, and happy and well-loved. That's what's important!

 

[disneyfan551]

Why doesn't anyone cook at home anymore?

Because it's a pain in the po-po and I'm not going to waste my time doing it, if given the opportunity!

 

[Christine]

Originally posted by WilmaBud
Amen, tw1nsmom! You said what I've been thinking ever since I first read this thread this morning. I don't get why people need to feel "superior" because they cook every night of the week. We eat together as a family almost every night, but we do a lot of take out. So what? Not one of us is fat or unhealthy.

Times are different from when we were kids. We all have tons of activities that take us out of the house at varying times. We do the best we can with the time we've got.

I work parttime, at home. My house is perpetually messy, and we do take-out a few times a week. I'm not lazy, and I'm not a bad mom. My kids are healthy, respectful, and happy and well-loved. That's what's important!

Wilmabud, I don't think anyone was trying to be "superior" on this thread or make anyone feel bad (I am one of the ones who cooks most of the week); however, the OP was obviously dismayed at her DH WHO IS A STAY AT HOME DAD and can't make a meal (or clean the house as noted in her other thread). I think most of us are just agreeing that it CAN be done with a little planning and organzation. If it is not important to you to prepare meals and you feel that you are still getting healthy food--hey no big deal. But, a home cooked meal and a reasonably orderly house seems to matter somewhat to Missypie and I don't see what's wrong with agreeing with her on that matter--it doesn't mean I am condemning the other side, especially if they are not complaining.

I do think I see where Missypie is coming from. We choose one or the other spouse to stay home for specific reasons--one of which, most importantly, is to be there for the kids at all times. The other reasons have a lot to do with running/maintaining an orderly household. That takes the stress off of everybody! With both myself and DH working, our household organization and cleaniness suffers. If one of us were at home, sacrificing an income, I would expect that meals would be prepared and the house would be maintained in all ways. If these things are not going to be done, heck, he might as well go to work since the kids are apparently in school.