When were you last victim of a mommy driveby

[itchin2go]

Then why take any chances at all? Why drive in a car? Why to out to restaurants. It is about risks and risk tolerance. Since my child is more likely to suffer from food poisoning or start choking in a crowded restaurant than be molested in a bathroom, I will take my chances.

You know, for someone who was offended that someone else criticized your choices, you seem just as critical of others' choices.

I would not let my daughter go to the restroom by herself anywhere other than home, school or friends' houses, and she's 8. She's my daughter and it's my business. I have my reasons and I think they're sound.

I would not have made that comment to you in the restaurant, even if I disagreed with what you did. It's not my business. I may view it as an unnecessary risk, but you're not intentionally putting her in harm's way, so it's not my business. I might chat about it privately at my table, but I probably wouldn't even notice.

 

[turkeymama]

The judge was wrong. Here are the statutes, by state: link...

Gotta love google. I see some of the AAP recommendations listed in this thread, so maybe the judge was referring to those and maybe that is what our state's DFS uses as guidelines.

 

[smschex]

I never let him clean up dog-doo either--at 6 or now at 13. I'll admit it--I like to shield him from germs. And I think it's my right as a parent to feel that way.

My kids would love to be adopted by you! They hate that chore.

 

[bellebud]

i just want to mention also - i've seen little kids who cannot work the faucets sometimes, or cannot get the paper towels out of the dispenser, etc. I know I've many times helped a child turn on the water, get the towel, etc. I don't even remember if the child was truly alone, or the mom was still in a stall or something. I'd not want my small child to go alone for those reasons too.

 

[DebD4T]

My DDs are 15 and 11 and when one of them has to go, I ask the other one to accompany her. I honestly don't know exactly WHY I am so adamant about it, but I don't like my DDs going to a public bathroom alone.

Maybe I watch too many crime dramas!! LOL!

OP, I would not have said anything to you. I tend to mind my own business when it comes to parenting, but I never let my children go into a public restroom alone at 6. JMHO.

 

[wvjules]

My DDs are 15 and 11 and when one of them has to go, I ask the other one to accompany her. I honestly don't know exactly WHY I am so adamant about it, but I don't like my DDs going to a public bathroom alone.

Maybe I watch too many crime dramas!! LOL!

OP, I would not have said anything to you. I tend to mind my own business when it comes to parenting, but I never let my children go into a public restroom alone at 6. JMHO.

You don't let your FIFTEEN year old go alone?

 

[OceanAnnie]

My DDs are 15 and 11 and when one of them has to go, I ask the other one to accompany her. I honestly don't know exactly WHY I am so adamant about it, but I don't like my DDs going to a public bathroom alone.

Maybe I watch too many crime dramas!! LOL!

OP, I would not have said anything to you. I tend to mind my own business when it comes to parenting, but I never let my children go into a public restroom alone at 6. JMHO.

I do too! It's amazing how many ways there are to be evil. I don't want to debate whether it's more crime now or the same as yesteryear. I'm cautious. I'm okay with it.

I mind my own business too, when it comes to other parent's choices.

 

[bumbershoot]

Today in the local news, a 24 year old developmentally disabled man was lured into a bathroom at a local park (where he was fishing), and was sexually assaulted.


I do things that people would consider risky. I don't generally live my life in fear, and the things I fear are often different from what mainstream society fears.

But this...this is just so simple. Bathrooms are places where pants are pulled down. So, try to not send people in who can't try to defend themselves if a predator happens to be in the bathroom at the same time. And obviously, from today's news (I should say that the park is a huge one, and houses the local zoo, there are kids there all the time), there are chances that a predator will be lurking.

 

[testifyoncruises]

Two students were shot at a school in Littleton yesterday, and a teacher was shot at an elementary school in Tacoma this morning. Does this mean those of you who send your kids to school will not now because of a chance of something happening?

I think age happens to be just a number and my six year old is mature enough to go to the bathroom on her own in a crowded restaurant without the need for the comments from the peanut gallery and mommy drive-bys. WE choose not to live our lives on what-ifs...but certainly don't care if others do and certainly would never come up in a restaurant and make a comment on it.

 

[npmommie]

Two students were shot at a school in Littleton yesterday, and a teacher was shot at an elementary school in Tacoma this morning. Does this mean those of you who send your kids to school will not now because of a chance of something happening?

I think age happens to be just a number and my six year old is mature enough to go to the bathroom on her own in a crowded restaurant without the need for the comments from the peanut gallery and mommy drive-bys. WE choose not to live our lives on what-ifs...but certainly don't care if others do and certainly would never come up in a restaurant and make a comment on it.

I think your biggest issue is the fact that someone said something to you? am I right?
you don't judge others parenting because you don't want yours judged, is that right?
or do you judge others parenting styles, I can't figure it out

I agree about not saying anything, I would never say something to someone in your situation, I try to keep my opinions to myself

 

[fairestoneofall]

Two students were shot at a school in Littleton yesterday, and a teacher was shot at an elementary school in Tacoma this morning. Does this mean those of you who send your kids to school will not now because of a chance of something happening?

I think age happens to be just a number and my six year old is mature enough to go to the bathroom on her own in a crowded restaurant without the need for the comments from the peanut gallery and mommy drive-bys. WE choose not to live our lives on what-ifs...but certainly don't care if others do and certainly would never come up in a restaurant and make a comment on it.

when you posted this thread, you opened yourself up for comments from the peanut gallery.

and you are now being a "peanut gallery" for those who disagree with you.

(i normally stay out of drama threads. but please, don't complain about something that you are doing yourself.)

 

[Arielle22]

Does anyone from new england or new hampshire remember the crazy guy that went in the bathroom in one of the state park areas in NH, up in the white mountains area? I think he got inside the toilet somehow, it was one of those out house log cabin type toilets, no flush or water, he was inside looking up!!!!

I remember that. He claimed he was looking for something that he had dropped in.

I remember thinking ICK!

 

[Arielle22]

I always wondered why perfect strangers felt that they could tell me what I could or couldn't do while pregnant....that's the only time I've been mommy drive by'ed....but right now I am getting tired of getting constantly asked about my ankle. What is with nosy people?

I had a friend who was outside work smoking and a woman walking by took her to task for smoking while pregnant and how bad it was. My friend was too shocked to say anything. She was not pregnant but pooh sized (and shaped)

 

[Arielle22]

This confuses me, so many here let their daughters go to the washroom by themselves. If that's the case how come when they grow up they go in pairs???

You need to go in pairs so one can hold the stall door closed when the lock is broken.

Also at clubs you carry small purses so one holds a brush and hair spray while the other holds the make up.

See, perfectly reasonable

 

[luvsJack]

Two students were shot at a school in Littleton yesterday, and a teacher was shot at an elementary school in Tacoma this morning. Does this mean those of you who send your kids to school will not now because of a chance of something happening?

I think age happens to be just a number and my six year old is mature enough to go to the bathroom on her own in a crowded restaurant without the need for the comments from the peanut gallery and mommy drive-bys. WE choose not to live our lives on what-ifs...but certainly don't care if others do and certainly would never come up in a restaurant and make a comment on it.

No one can actually "live" their live by what ifs. If they try to, they are not actually living. But, there are some things that can be prevented; so why not? There isn't a huge chance that my dd will be assualted in the restroom, but why not wipe that chance altogether? That is just my theory and my choice for my child--you, of course, are free to make your own choices.

I can't take away all dangers and I am not going to try and I think the comparisons you are coming up with are ridiculous. But, I am very active with my child's school and safety is a number one issue. Any small thing that can be done to prevent a school shooting such as you have mentioned , is at least mentioned in meetings and discussed and if feasible, put into place. So, you see, I am proactive in those types of dangers also.

 

[cpbjgc]

The judge was wrong. Here are the statutes, by state: link...

Actually the judge is right. Hitting anyone is battery. Intending to hit them and then hitting them is assault and battery. Slapping a two year old in the face is a crime.

What you have in that link is the circumstances where it is considered jutstified. In all cases it becomes a question of whether it is reasonable response to maintain discipline. So you can't say that in every case it's ok to hit a child - actually its the opposite - it is wrong unless it is demonstrated it is a reasonable response to maintain discipline.

Whacking a kid 2 year old on the face because they are doing something dangerous to themselves or others - probably a reasonable response in your state. Whacking a 2 year old kid on the face because they dropped an M&M on the floor - probably not a reasonable response in your state (though I could be wrong).

 

[tinkermom23]

I did a Mommy-Driveby once, or twice....

Worst was last summer at a playground. I'm a helicopter parent and always play with my kids at the park. There were 2 other kids playing, maybe 2 & 3 yrs old. I noticed right away they didn't have a parent with them but there was a woman in a van parked about 50 yards away. After about 15 min. one of the little ones walked over towards the van and I though he was going to get in but couldn't get the door open. He ran around the van, ON THE STREET, and tried another door. I told DS10 to watch his brother & sister, and I ran as fast as I could to the little boy as he ran to the next van and then back to the first van, where he opened the door and got inside. His mom was talking on her cellphone!

After I calmed myself, I got my kids all buckled in my van and then I went over to her and gave her a piece of my mind. I was really nice at first but it did get kinda ugly. She threatened me and said a lot of swear words at me, then I left. She did not tell me to pound sand, though!

Anyway, I know that in that situation, I would again be a "driveby mom." I would also hope that if I were to have a serious lapse of judgment and my kids were at risk, someone would tell me, even if I get defensive.

JMHO

 

[DisneyBamaFan]

Actually the judge is right. Hitting anyone is battery. Intending to hit them and then hitting them is assault and battery. Slapping a two year old in the face is a crime...

Yeah, spanking is assault and battery...

Wait, I'm not done...

Hold on...



Thanks...

 

[testifyoncruises]

I can't take away all dangers and I am not going to try and I think the comparisons you are coming up with are ridiculous.

They are no more ridiculous than some of the other comparisons in this thread and stories of rare incidents, none of which involve a restroom in a crowded restaurant.

She went on her own tonight and the restaurant was not as crowded. Thankfully no mommy drivebys.

 

[rszdtrvl]

Are y'all sure you are ready for this???

Seriously, I couldn't make this up if I wanted to.

Here goes :

My son was turning 13 last December and wanted an ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins. We decided to go order one - a large one for his party - and at the same time purchased him a banana split.

Paid for both items and went home on our merry way.

Next day, I get a phone call AT HOME from one of the workers. She stated that she noticed my son's mannerisms and wanted to know what was wrong with him. She mentioned that this phone call had nothing to do with the cake or order, it was a personal phone call.

I was shellshocked. Dumbfounded. Awed.

I proceeded to tell her that my son has Aspergers and ADHD. She wanted to recommend a doctor that helped a friend of hers whose daughter had Celiac. I told her (why I told her anything is beyond me - I should have told her it was none of her business) that my son had been diagnosed by several physicians and that his illness has nothing to do with Celiac. She proceeded to tell me that she was concerned because we bought such a sugar loaded fattening LARGE cake and purchased a sugar loaded fattening treat for our son. Yes, she said LARGE and SUGAR LOADED cake. And that she really wanted to recommend some new physicians and naturopathic doctors to me.

I finally got her off the phone.

DH came home and I told him what happened. His first words were "Are you kidding me?"

Unfortunately, I was not.

DH went to Baskin Robbins and talked to the manager and let him know the entire phone conversation I had with his employee. He looked like he had been run over by a truck. It was truly amazing how UNPROFESSIONAL and NOSEY his employee was. DH said that she needs to be talked to and that our UNLISTED phone number should have never been taken home by an employee and that we wanted to cancel our order and that we will never be doing business with them again.

DH said that you could have knocked the manager over with a feather. His mouth was open the entire time. He refunded us our entire cake amount, PLUS the amount for the banana split.

This was my latest "mommy drive-by".

My son ended up getting a delicious cake from the Safeway bakery for his birthday. And to this day has no idea why he didn't get his cake from Baskin Robbins.