What is the customary gift for a quinceañera?

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

We have only been invited to one and the family lives in the LA area so we made a side trip to Disneyland and got the birthday girl a 3 day park hopper that was good for the rest of the year (military ticket). She chose to use it all while we where there but she could have saved some of it for later if she wanted.

 

[mjkacmom]

For Catholic families celebrating quinceañeras, the Church actually encourages more modest celebrations, especially discouraging events that put the family in debt. And that's also the Church's preference regarding Catholic weddings, Confirmation and First Holy Communion parties . But unfortunately, she can only advise; she can't command adherence to less expensive/ more spiritual affairs.

The Catholoc church here does not discourage pricey religious celebrations here. They make it known how long the ceremonies are, because they know many have big parties planned.

 

[L&Lfan]

The Catholoc church here does not discourage pricey religious celebrations here. They make it known how long the ceremonies are, because they know many have big parties planned.

Our diocese issued guidelines. I would think most dioceses have them. Whether they are followed or not is another matter...

 

[mjkacmom]

Our diocese issued guidelines. I would think most dioceses have them. Whether they are followed or not is another matter...

I live in the land of over the top catholic celebrations, I can’t imagine our diocese suggesting limiting parties. It wouldn’t go over well with a lot of the more generous donators. First communion, boys wear suits, girls wear expensive dresses and get their hair done.

 

[gotomu212]

The wedding ceremony is not a party . But if someone decides to spend 10k on the reception, then IMO that is in fact a big fancy party.

And I have said NUMEROUS times that I understand the significance of the celebration. But is it or is it not celebrating the girl turning 15? So it is in fact a big fancy birthday party. We do not have to agree on this point. But this celebration is celebrating the girl turning 15. It is not a celebration of anything other than a BIRTHDAY.

And I never said it was "just" a Birthday Party. I have said and still believe that this is a Birthday Party.

It’s not, and it’s fine if you don’t want to understand that this isn’t a birthday party (in the same way a bar mitzvah isn’t a boys 13th birthday party).

The fact that you want to argue with someone about a tradition you are not a part of and weren’t raised with but somehow have all figured out is bananas.

 

[Skellingtonj]

It’s not, and it’s fine if you don’t want to understand that this isn’t a birthday party (in the same way a bar mitzvah isn’t a boys 13th birthday party).

The fact that you want to argue with someone about a tradition you are not a part of and weren’t raised with but somehow have all figured out is bananas.

Plus one. I agree with the majority $50 for a friend $100 for family. Enjoy!

 

[disneychrista]

The fact that you want to argue with someone about a tradition you are not a part of and weren’t raised with but somehow have all figured out is bananas.

You are welcome to believe what you want. I have never ONCE argued anything about the tradition. I understand the tradition and the significance. I have & will argue that $50 is a large sum for a casual school friend to give for said tradition. And I would argue the same for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah, Sweet 16's, and other similar traditions.

 

[Skellingtonj]

You are welcome to believe what you want. I have never ONCE argued anything about the tradition. I understand the tradition and the significance. I have & will argue that $50 is a large sum for a casual school friend to give for said tradition. And I would argue the same for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah, Sweet 16's, and other similar traditions.

Why does it matter what anyone gives?? Give what you can or don’t go

 

[4kids4karen]

What if it's your niece? My niece has one in the spring.

My husband’s family in Texas does sponsorship. For example one family will sponsor the cake, another the band, etc. for his niece’s quinceañera we sponsored the cake. For his sister’s wedding we sponsored the mariachi band. When we attended, each sponsor received a flower to wear to be recognized. Sponsoring doesn’t mean you pick those items out. We told them what we would sponsor and they picked their own cake and band and we paid for what they selected.

Here in Tampa the gifts my daughter gave at her friends’ quinceañera were no different than any other birthday party.

My husband had a niece who didn’t want a party. She wanted to go to Hawaii with her best friend (escorted by mom) so asked for sponsors to help pay for the trip. That was pretty much just donating to their vacation fund.

Sponsorship does help with the cost. My daughter decided not to have a quinceañera since our family is split among so many different locations and if we went to Texas to hold it where the majority of her Mexican family are, her friends wouldn’t be able to attend. However, all of those families that WE sponsored, it would go without saying would be expected to sponsor back when it was our daughter’s quinceañera or wedding. Right now my daughter is trying to decide what she wants to do for her 16th Birthday. Disney or a cruise with her bff is the debate. LoL.

 

[4kids4karen]

Speaking of Quincenera's, I received a save the date for one that is early summer 2019, I had no idea people sent save the dates for anything else but weddings.

I say $50 for a friend is a very nice gift.

It is comparable planning to a wedding. The family has to reserve the church and coordinate/plan the private mass, banquet hall, catering, band, etc. Some banquet hall's in San Antonio required you hire a private security team, event insurance, etc. Some families do all their work themselves, others hire special event planners, etc. Family from out of town have to take off work, drive or fly down, etc.

 

[disneychrista]

Why does it matter what anyone gives?? Give what you can or don’t go

Which is kinda my point to begin with.

 

[gina2000]

Considering the question posed is what is customary......

Not what do you think should be customary.....

 

[dreamin_disney]

I just think things get out of hand! Have your daughter take whatever gift she wants. She can even do a few things from bath and body works, any gift, money $25 or $25 gift card or inexpensive jewelry($20-$30). Quinceneras are very expensive parties the parents choose to have. Most have what are called padrino's who end up paying for things like the dress, the hall, the dj, the food, the cake, the jewelry, the limo, the decorations etc. Usually the family and close adult friends of the family will give a lot of money but your DD is just a school friend so keep it simple. Even a nice jewelry box $20 would be fine. Just tell your dd to have fun

 

[FlightlessDuck]

$50 was the standard gift for a sweet 16 invite when my kids were invited to them.
$54 for bar/bat mitzvahs.

Why ... 4?

 

[dreamin_disney]

The Catholoc church here does not discourage pricey religious celebrations here. They make it known how long the ceremonies are, because they know many have big parties planned.

thats because the bigger and fancier the party the church will get a bigger donation.

My husband’s family in Texas does sponsorship. For example one family will sponsor the cake, another the band, etc. for his niece’s quinceañera we sponsored the cake. For his sister’s wedding we sponsored the mariachi band. When we attended, each sponsor received a flower to wear to be recognized. Sponsoring doesn’t mean you pick those items out. We told them what we would sponsor and they picked their own cake and band and we paid for what they selected.

Here in Tampa the gifts my daughter gave at her friends’ quinceañera were no different than any other birthday party.

My husband had a niece who didn’t want a party. She wanted to go to Hawaii with her best friend (escorted by mom) so asked for sponsors to help pay for the trip. That was pretty much just donating to their vacation fund.

Sponsorship does help with the cost. My daughter decided not to have a quinceañera since our family is split among so many different locations and if we went to Texas to hold it where the majority of her Mexican family are, her friends wouldn’t be able to attend. However, all of those families that WE sponsored, it would go without saying would be expected to sponsor back when it was our daughter’s quinceañera or wedding. Right now my daughter is trying to decide what she wants to do for her 16th Birthday. Disney or a cruise with her bff is the debate. LoL.

That is why the parties have moved from a traditional to more fancy and expensive. In the old days people in mexico didn't have a lot of money to have big fancy parties. they would kill a pig or cow and make a big feast, go to church for a simple ceremony and the girl wore the nicest dress she had. Nowadays it just seems like who can out do the other. Another thing is the sponsorship aka padrino's. I feel parents put people on the spot to pay for something and usually those things are expensive. I knew a girl that got married and asked the padrino to pay for her rings that were $10,000 he told her he couldnt but would give $4,000-$5,000. This girl had no job, her husband worked at home depot and she lived with her dad and her man lived with his parents. Once they got married they moved in with his parents. To me if you cant afford big parties like this its wrong to expect others to pay for it.
Bless your heart because things you've had to sponsor were pretty expensive. I hope they all pull in for your DD

 

[Skellingtonj]

Why ... 4?

Giving money in multiples of 18 is a jewish tradition for bat and bar mitzvahs

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Why ... 4?

Because monetary gifts are usually multiples of 18 in that case.

 

[dreamin_disney]

Giving money in multiples of 18 is a jewish tradition for bat and bar mitzvahs

just curious for bat mitzvahs do the parents pay for it all or do they also ask friends and family to pay for certain things? and what kinda gifts are given? Just curious

 

[Eureka]

It’s not just a “birthday party” for people that celebrate quinces as part of their culture. It’s a much bigger deal, almost like a wedding.

Or a bar or bat mitzvah.

 

[Eureka]

just curious for bar mitzvahs do the parents pay for it all or do they also ask friends and family to pay for certain things? and what kinda gifts are given? Just curious

When I had mine in the 80s, my parents paid for it all, although the parties were not nearly as elaborate as they are now. Gifts ranged from jewelry to savings bonds, cash (back then only one or two multiples of $18!), gift cards, etc.