What is an "average" inheritance?

[MinnieLovesMickey12]

I think when a FIL or grandparent dies if their spouse is still alive then nobody should count on getting anything. Usually everything goes to the living spouse.

Now when MIL or grandma dies there may be something for everybody.

But our wills are set up to where if one of us dies the other one gets everything. We have personal items set up in our wills to go to our kids but as for any money in the bank or insurance policies nobody gets that but the other spouse.

 

[palmbeachmom]

My dad died when I was young and my mom never remarried, and she maintained 2 large term life insurance policies, which we never understood why. When she died, she had split the life insurance among her 4 grandkids equally, which basically will pay for their college education completely if they choose to use it for that. She didn't leave any sort of trust instructions, so the 2 over 18 got theirs paid out already. The insurance company put the other 2's money in a supplemental policy and will pay out as soon as they reach 18 years of age. Big lesson: DON'T EVER LEAVE LIFE INSURANCE TO A MINOR, without specific guidelines!!!

 

[dawnball]

With my mom using her long term care insurance, DW and I have been looking into buying it for ourselves. No shortage of options here, although prices are creeping up. My mom paid $75,000 (half her life savings) for her policy 13 years ago....it was a combo long term care/life insurance policy. So beneficiaries would get the full $75,000 back plus interest if the long term care went unused.

My big concern with long term care is that I think many insurance companies aren't charging enough - if the actuarial model is flawed enough the company goes under - your premiums are gone, and there's no care coverage. You really need to pick a company you trust to stick around for as long as you expect to live.

 

[Karlzmom]

Amen! My parents are retired now and my mom constantly complains about living on a fixed income. I tried to explain that we all live on a fixed income, called a budget. She spent money faster than they could make it.

AMEN! It always irks me when people whine about "fixed incomes." Unless you work on some kind of a commission basis, every person has a "fixed income." You have what you have and need to budget it.

 

[lost*in*cyberspace]

My dad died when I was young and my mom never remarried, and she maintained 2 large term life insurance policies, which we never understood why. When she died, she had split the life insurance among her 4 grandkids equally, which basically will pay for their college education completely if they choose to use it for that. She didn't leave any sort of trust instructions, so the 2 over 18 got theirs paid out already. The insurance company put the other 2's money in a supplemental policy and will pay out as soon as they reach 18 years of age. Big lesson: DON'T EVER LEAVE LIFE INSURANCE TO A MINOR, without specific guidelines!!!

I would modify this to say never make a minor a beneficiary of an insurance policy, period. You need to set up a trust for the minor and direct that the money go there.

I will inherit a small amount from my mom, but my husband will have a very large inheritance when his mom passes away (his dad is deceased, mom is 84); likely close to seven figures, if not more (this is after splitting with two siblings). Both his parents were only children who benefited from large inheritances when they were younger. It's kind of sad that they never helped any of their children or grandchildren financially (would have been nice to pay for college for the grandkids).

 

[lost*in*cyberspace]

Sorry, duplicate post.

 

[crisi]

It also depends on how many ways the wealth is distributed. When my husband's step grandmother died, her two stepsons (in their 60s), her two nieces (in their 50s) and her four step grandchildren (between 25 and 40) split a seven figure net worth that also had in it significant charitable contributions including an endowment to a university for a scholarship. The check we got was nice, but it can still set my father in law off on how small his portion was - he'd assumed it would be split two ways without any charitable contributions.

My grandmother had not much net worth and was never in a nursing home. However, the last week of care ate up $50k in private hospice. She had the money and that was what her sons decided to spend it on.

Also beware the "tale of Ted" - Ted is a distant acquaintance who had a wealthy father and was an only child. Ted's father was 30 years older than him and lived into his 80s. From the time Ted was in his 20s (and his Dad seemed about to drop dead being 50 already) Ted lived in expectation of inheriting great wealth. He was in his 50s before his Dad died - and his father set up a trust. Ted won't starve and there will be a roof over his head, but his dreams of wealth are done for. When Ted dies, the trust goes to charity.

 

[NotUrsula]

If I had to guess, I'd say about 2X the value of the family residence if there is one, unless the residence was sold to finance long-term care, in which case descendants are lucky to get anything at all.

 

[tvguy]

My big concern with long term care is that I think many insurance companies aren't charging enough - if the actuarial model is flawed enough the company goes under - your premiums are gone, and there's no care coverage. You really need to pick a company you trust to stick around for as long as you expect to live.

Absoluely agree. The most shocking thing to me in the past year when my mom starting using her long term care insurance, is how few care providers have ever dealt with people with coverage. The Rehab center had dealt with that kind of insurance, but said the paperwork my mom's insurance provider required was about 10 times what they are used to. Her doctor called the paper work "excessive"....guess there the standard form is like one page, this was 11 pages. When I got to the board and cares, none of the 4 I toured had ever had a resident with insurance. All the owners said most folks just pay for care out of pocket. Was interesting getting the payment confirmation the insurance company wanted....they said "just have the homes business office provide an invoice"......ah, board and cares are indivdually owned facilities with an owner and 1 or 2 caregivers and 6 residents.....there is no business office. Finally, the owner went out and bought a receipt book, and the insurance company said they would accept that.

 

[Pigeon]

Most of the long term care policies I've looked at only cover a few years. If the person needs to be in a nursing home for a long time, they run out fairly quickly.

 

[Bete]

Most of the long term care policies I've looked at only cover a few years. If the person needs to be in a nursing home for a long time, they run out fairly quickly.

This depends on what you sign up for. I won't go into all the details as to why I did this, but I bought a policy that will take 10 years to pay off, but I get a lifetime of coverage even if I need a nursing home. There is a cap on the per day charge covered in a nursing home, but there is an inflation factor built in that hopefully keeps it pretty current with such costs. This is a very expensive policy to say the least. I have heard it's not so easy to collect on these long term care policies; there are requirements to meet before getting coverage in a nursing home from the insurance companies. I think the insurance companies have not been as strict in the past about these requirements, but with the baby boomer generation coming up this is changing to being a lot harder. You will almost have to be on your death bed to get the benefit.

I have read that the insurance companies are fearful of the baby boomer generation in regards to these long term care policies. I am a baby boomer. This is why some insurance companies are leaving this part of the business. Others are making it more difficult to qualify for long term care insurance. Others are raising prices on these policies big time. Also, my greatest fear is that the insurance company won't exist when I need the policy to be enforced. Unfortunately, I believe this will be the next big bust in this country and our economy. In some ways I don't know why I signed up for a policy, but I do know I wanted to leave an inheritance if possible. I felt this was some protection for that purpose. Also, I hate the idea of a nursing home getting life savings and so forth; so, I got some protection (I hope).

Also, if you look at statistics supposedly the average life of a nursing home person is about 3 years. This is why there are a lot of those kind of policies available for long term care.

More and more people are living for now. This is why the statistics show less and less net worth of a person. I really don't feel anyone should count on an inheritance. If it's there it's a bonus. I lost my mother recently and I did receive a decent inheritance, but believe me I rather have my mother, here. As Suze Orman says, people first, then money, and then things.

 

[Disneybuckeye]

I hope said niece or nephew never reads this post; it's not terribly nice to judge a child by something they cannot control.

il·le·git·i·mate [ ìlli jíttəmət ] 1.born out of wedlock: born to parents who are not married to each other

Why do you assume I was judging? It is what the child is by definition.

 

[lost*in*cyberspace]

il·le·git·i·mate [ ìlli jíttəmət ] 1.born out of wedlock: born to parents who are not married to each other

Why do you assume I was judging? It is what the child is by definition.

You are absolutely correct, although the term nonmaritial child could also be used.

 

[StephMK]

il·le·git·i·mate [ ìlli jíttəmət ] 1.born out of wedlock: born to parents who are not married to each other

Why do you assume I was judging? It is what the child is by definition.

The word has a negative connotation, regardless if it is accurate. Why is it necessary to define the child at all?


Thankfully, both sets of parents are financially wise and barring any unforeseen circumstances, will not need our assistance. They enjoy life but are not frivolous with their money. Two of my grandparents lived until their 90s and still managed to leave sizeable amounts. I would much rather have family around than any inheritance they may leave. As it stands now, we would inherit from both sides and I do see that as a responsibility to carry it on to our kids.

 

[crashbb]

You are absolutely correct, although the term nonmaritial child could also be used.

Or left out all together. No need to label (in the context of the discussion) other than to pass judgement on the mother and/or child and the amount of inheritance they "deserve".

 

[jenseib]

The word has a negative connotation, regardless if it is accurate. Why is it necessary to define the child at all?


Thankfully, both sets of parents are financially wise and barring any unforeseen circumstances, will not need our assistance. They enjoy life but are not frivolous with their money. Two of my grandparents lived until their 90s and still managed to leave sizeable amounts. I would much rather have family around than any inheritance they may leave. As it stands now, we would inherit from both sides and I do see that as a responsibility to carry it on to our kids.

I have to agree. i held my tongue, but it was a VERY negative thing to say. It's not politically correct to use any more and now a days, whether people like it or not, MANY children are born out of wedlock ...and honestly ...who cares. You should NEVER label any child with such a negative term.

 

[FINFAN]

.
I don't think there is an average, or that there ever really was in the past.

Parents have already given their greatest gift to their kids.....life. Spend it wisely.

 

[NotUrsula]

The word has a negative connotation, regardless if it is accurate. Why is it necessary to define the child at all?

Yes, it does have a negative connotation, but to be fair, this topic is actually the one place where there might be some pertinent reason for the definition.

In legal terms, children born out of wedlock on the male line normally do not have the same standing for inheritance than those born in wedlock do (also true of adopted children in some cases, depending on how the will or trust is drawn.) If you are male and you want to be sure that an out-of-wedlock heir of the body inherits, then you usually have to say so in so many words.

 

[dr&momto2boys]

Seems like in many cases, you're lucky if you're not having to help your parents financially at the end of their lives. In other words, not only no inheritance, but taking care of them physically and/or financially seems to be a trend.

 

[pocomom]

Seems like in many cases, you're lucky if you're not having to help your parents financially at the end of their lives. In other words, not only no inheritance, but taking care of them physically and/or financially seems to be a trend.

See, this is something i don't like about our society- the idea that you might be "unlucky" to have to care for your aging parents. I understand it can be very challenging to take care of an aging parent or grandparent. I don't discount that. But I feel like it is my duty, and my privilege to do so. Skipping the last generation , this was the norm for our society for hundreds, thousands of years. The elderly in most cases still have much to contribute, even up to the point of needing intensive care... It will be my honor to serve my parents in the way they served us for so many years.