What is a snowflake?

[punkin]

What's wrong with kids using public transportation?

There is nothing wrong with children using public transportation.

I remember there was a thread here a while back when people were outraged that a 9 yo rode the subway in NYC by himself. I never understood why that was a problem.

 

[FireDancer]

Sadly it isn't just little kids that are snowflakes, those little fragile souls grow up. There is nothing better than watching a snowflake make it into the workforce and then crash and burn because they don't have the life skills to cope in the real world. It really is so much fun to watch. They have no idea how to be proactive and actually solve a problem, they just wait for someone else to come and tell them the solution to their problem because that is what helicopter mommy and daddy have done their whole life.

Luckily the management team here has little patience for these kinds of people and they are quickly shown the door but watching the clueless-nes is almost worth the extra work they create for the good employees...almost.

 

[Magpie]

Just so you know that the kids are using the same buses as all walks of adult life, and I mean ALL walks .....

Yes, and...? I'm curious to know what dangers you think my kids might encounter.

 

[palavra]

Wow, this thread has me .

What is the term for "overly-sensitive DIS posters"?

A DISflake?

 

[MamaJessie]

A DISflake?

 

[U2_rocks!]

Yes, and...? I'm curious to know what dangers you think my kids might encounter.

Not so much you specifically. Just a point that those parents who couldn't handle their kids walking too far to catch school buses or waiting at the bus collection point alone could never deal with our bus system. The amount of cursing and other lewd behaviour on the buses every day (mostly by the teens and young adults, but add in a few drunks and it gets even more colorful ) would make your hair curl.

 

[ccgirl]

Not so much you specifically. Just a point that those parents who couldn't handle their kids walking too far to catch school buses or waiting at the bus collection point alone could never deal with our bus system. The amount of cursing and other lewd behaviour on the buses every day (mostly by the teens and young adults, but add in a few drunks and it gets even more colorful ) would make your hair curl.

I have to say..this is one of the reasons I enrolled my DD in the school I did. I did not like the idea of a K being on the same bus as a 5th grader. Just because the cursing and lewd behavior happen does not make them right and does not mean I should subject my young children to them. Heck, my DD thinks Hell is a swear! I guess someone could interpret that I am raising a snowflake. IDK.

 

[Carly_Roach]

Sadly it isn't just little kids that are snowflakes, those little fragile souls grow up. There is nothing better than watching a snowflake make it into the workforce and then crash and burn because they don't have the life skills to cope in the real world. It really is so much fun to watch. They have no idea how to be proactive and actually solve a problem, they just wait for someone else to come and tell them the solution to their problem because that is what helicopter mommy and daddy have done their whole life.

Luckily the management team here has little patience for these kinds of people and they are quickly shown the door but watching the clueless-nes is almost worth the extra work they create for the good employees...almost.

OMG! You just perfectly described something that happened in our office last week or the week before.

Our boss had assigned a fresh-out-of-college Communications graduate to work up a fast promotion for a product on her own. She had two working days to bring it up to speed. Our 50-ish Sales guy was giving her all the data she needed for this promotion, but that wasn't enough for her. She wanted him (the Sales guy) to stay in our office and tell her how it should look, what it should say, where she should put the info, yadda yadda yadda. He simply didn't have the time for that. He had his own work to do.

She made a big deal about how her degree was in Communications, not Marketing and Sales, and how unfair it was to put this in her lap and make it her responsibility. I commisserated with her plight, but I had my own work to do. I couldn't be taking time out to help her because I have deadlines I have to meet.

I don't think these kids have learned that sometimes life puts you into a no-win situation. They have no clue how to handle the no-win scenario because they've never experienced it. It's how you get through that situation that determines your character and ability to handle it again in the future.

Of course, maybe character isn't as big a value these days as it used to be. Local headlines have been squawking about a 50-some dentist from this area who picked up someone else's credit card in a parking lot while he was on vacation in Florida and used it to buy $40 in pizza rather than use the $250 he had in his wallet. He got caught and is now trying to call it a "mistake" or a "brain fade".

I suppose snowflakes aren't limited to the under 50 set after all, eh?

 

[stepmommyof1]

Wow, all I wanted to know was what a snowflake was!! I didn't mean it to turn into a debate on the good and evils of parenting styles

 

[mamacatnv]

A DISflake?

I love this!

Wow, all I wanted to know was what a snowflake was!! I didn't mean it to turn into a debate on the good and evils of parenting styles

ahcomeonnow its the DIS

 

[Carly_Roach]

Wow, all I wanted to know was what a snowflake was!! I didn't mean it to turn into a debate on the good and evils of parenting styles

See? Now let this be a lesson to you: sometimes 'tis better to Google first.



Especially on the first day of Lent when everyone's suffering from a hangover coupled with sugar/fat withdrawal symptoms.

 

[Uncle Remus]

Wow, all I wanted to know was what a snowflake was!! I didn't mean it to turn into a debate on the good and evils of parenting styles

 

[ccgirl]

See? Now let this be a lesson to you: sometimes 'tis better to Google first.



Especially on the first day of Lent when everyone's suffering from a hangover coupled with sugar/fat withdrawal symptoms.

That explains it! That must be why I'm feeling a little cranky today.

 

[laurie31]

I have to say..this is one of the reasons I enrolled my DD in the school I did. I did not like the idea of a K being on the same bus as a 5th grader. Just because the cursing and lewd behavior happen does not make them right and does not mean I should subject my young children to them. Heck, my DD thinks Hell is a swear! I guess someone could interpret that I am raising a snowflake. IDK.

I wouldn't consider protecting young children from such things to be overprotective, or making them a snowflake.

Also, in my experience, snowflake children aren't necessarily spoiled, just the parents treat them as if they can't possibly handle anything that isn't all happy flowers and sunshine, as in the example pages back about the parent insisting ther little darling HAD to be in math class with her best friend. THe kid may not have even mentioned it, it's all the parent thinking to heck with the school's schedule and everyone else's needs, it's all about THEIR child.

This is NOT what the above poster is doing, IMHO.

OMG! You just perfectly described something that happened in our office last week or the week before.

Our boss had assigned a fresh-out-of-college Communications graduate to work up a fast promotion for a product on her own. She had two working days to bring it up to speed. Our 50-ish Sales guy was giving her all the data she needed for this promotion, but that wasn't enough for her. She wanted him (the Sales guy) to stay in our office and tell her how it should look, what it should say, where she should put the info, yadda yadda yadda. He simply didn't have the time for that. He had his own work to do.

She made a big deal about how her degree was in Communications, not Marketing and Sales, and how unfair it was to put this in her lap and make it her responsibility. I commisserated with her plight, but I had my own work to do. I couldn't be taking time out to help her because I have deadlines I have to meet.

I don't think these kids have learned that sometimes life puts you into a no-win situation. They have no clue how to handle the no-win scenario because they've never experienced it. It's how you get through that situation that determines your character and ability to handle it again in the future.

Of course, maybe character isn't as big a value these days as it used to be. Local headlines have been squawking about a 50-some dentist from this area who picked up someone else's credit card in a parking lot while he was on vacation in Florida and used it to buy $40 in pizza rather than use the $250 he had in his wallet. He got caught and is now trying to call it a "mistake" or a "brain fade".

I suppose snowflakes aren't limited to the under 50 set after all, eh?

But the effect of the 'teacup' or 'snowflake' children comes to us from other avenues, too. And that could be where some of the bitterness you may be sensing from these posts is coming from. It's the interns we have to deal with who don't know how to research what we need them to research so we wind up having to do that job anyway. It's the fresh college graduate who has to stop whatever she's doing every 10 minutes to IM or text her friend, mother or boyfriend.

God forbid an unexpected meeting happens! Afterwards it's at least 20 minutes of chatting texting and/or frantic phone calls wondering where she was.

And I know I'll be forgiven for moving an office mate's cell phone to a closet or distant drawer when it was left at the office for several hours but the damn thing wouldn't stop ringing or beeping every 5 minutes. "Faithfully" is a cute ringtone once. Maybe twice. 15 times in 40 minutes? He's lucky I didn't take it to the ladies bathroom and flush it.

So yes, there is a sense of angst or disgust when bringing up the term "snowflake" on many people's parts. Some because they don't like what they consider to be a derogatory term. Others because they don't like what they consider to be derogatory behavior that's inflicted upon them from snowflakes.

These, and a few other posts, illustrate what so bad about raising snowflake children. It's not just having to deal with them as kids, but it's that they cannot take their place in society. They are helpless as adults. It reminds me of this story (not true - told for illustrative purposes):

A man watched a butterfly emerge from its chrysalis. He watched intently and noticed the butterfly struggling with the process. The man thought: I should help the creature birth. Taking a pair of scissors, he cut through the chrysalis in the hope that it would help the butterfly to drop out of its home and into the physical world. The butterfly did just that. It dropped out easily but with compromise. The butterfly had a withered body and shriveled wings. He watched and watched and thought to himself that at any moment the butterfly would fly. He was waiting with anticipation for the event to happen, for the body to become firmer and the wings to spread and carry the butterfly away into the aether. The butterfly did neither. Instead it just lay there. It spent the rest of its life crawling around with its withered body and shriveled wings.

What the man failed to realise was the “struggle” the butterfly was supposedly having during the birth wasn’t a struggle at all ― it was the ingenious design of the innate knowing of the butterfly.

A butterfly, when ready to be born, pushes itself through a tiny opening at the bottom of the chrysalis and in so doing forces all the fluid from its body to the wings, which helps it to fly. What the man missed was that if you touch or pull at a butterfly’s wings it is unable to fly, and without the art of flying, it perishes.

By removing every possible struggle from a child's life, they never learn to cope or learn critical thinking skills.

We see these people in the hospital where I work too, and it is SCARY!!! We can only hope they don't kill someone before we show them the door.

Not all our new grads are snowflakes. Some have a great work ethic and most provide excellent care. Others...not so much. We actually had to make a new policy that you couldn't carry your cell phone around in your uniform pocket. Seriously. It's sad because not only did they not know any better, but because when they were told it was wrong they were all, "But it's not against policy!"

And if an ADULT sees fit to have their mother call their boss about, well, ANYTHING...I hope Mom's got a nice studio apartment over the garage, because their kid is going to need it!

 

[NMAmy]

Wow, all I wanted to know was what a snowflake was!! I didn't mean it to turn into a debate on the good and evils of parenting styles

EVERY thread on the DIS has the potential to turn into a debate on the evils of someone else's parenting styles.

 

[Magpie]

Not all our new grads are snowflakes. Some have a great work ethic and most provide excellent care. Others...not so much. We actually had to make a new policy that you couldn't carry your cell phone around in your uniform pocket. Seriously. It's sad because not only did they not know any better, but because when they were told it was wrong they were all, "But it's not against policy!"

And if an ADULT sees fit to have their mother call their boss about, well, ANYTHING...I hope Mom's got a nice studio apartment over the garage, because their kid is going to need it!

Inquiring minds want to know - what's wrong with having a cell phone in your uniform pocket?

IS it against policy? Or are the new grads the only ones who aren't allowed to carry them?

About the butterfly... that's mostly true. Except we raised a lot of butterflies when my kids were small and every now and again one of them would end up with a bit of chrysalis glued to its body. Not every single one emerges perfectly without incident. When that happened, we'd carefully peel the remaining bit off.

Even butterflies need help, sometimes.

 

[Tinkermommy]

A DISflake?

Thanks for answering my question!

 

[crazelion]

I wish I could do without one right now but there is no public transportation where I live. My boyfriend shared my car for over a year until he had to get one to get a higher paying job.

You got that right we have no bus transportation at all. The five place the bus goes is sometimes where don't want go at all.

It scary when go big city like NYC and tell take subway and have no idea where going. LOL

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

I think one of the things that bothers me the most about the DIS version of snowflake-itis, is the tendency to think that parents belong squarely in one box or the other. The reality is that there are a lot of parents (like me! ) who are a little bit of one and a little bit of the other.

I'm sure that there are people here who think I'm a snowflake parent because:

1) I didn't let my kid sleep with a pillow during naptime at school until he was four and his teacher had to pull me aside and tell me they called it Sudden INFANT Death Syndrome and not Sudden PRESCHOOLER Death Syndrome for a reason.

2) If I work late, serve dinner late, help with homework late, then I usually let my kid sleep past the bus and drive him to school in the a.m..

3) My kid knows that I will pick him up anytime he calls, no questions asked, even if it's 2 a.m. from a sleepover at a house where I totally trust the family.

4) I'm still on the fence about allowing my 11 year old to play football next fall because I'm scared of concussions.

5) I go over every paper he writes with him before he turns it in and we do a final edit together.

Things I do where I feel like people on the DIS want to call CPS on me because:

1) I've let my 9 year old spend hours on his snowboard in the terrain park with no adult supervision whatsoever.

2) My 12 year old will ride public transportation on his own to and from camp and the swimming pool starting this summer.

3) My 11 year old walks to the bookstore, the computer store, and other neighborhood places after school with a cell phone in his pocket.

4) I let my kid plan our last Disney/Universal vacation almost completely on his own. The only thing I did was provide the credit card numbers, and give him a budget. Yes, he made some interesting choices. But we had fun anyway.

5) I wouldn't have hesitated to leave my 8 year old alone in a hotel room while I went for a swim 10 feet away. I might have done so even at a Value resort, and even without a baby monitor.

So, what kind of parent am I? What kind of kid do I have?

 

[Momvic5]

[/QUOTE=Magpie;40252279]Hey, I like this suggestion! No more hiding behind "cutesy" words. Let's just cut straight to the chase and say what we really mean.

I think I like "spoiled brat" better because there have always been "spoiled brats". Every generation has them. Snowflake (because it's newer) only ever seems to apply to the current generation of children and their parents.[/QUOTE]

.

Snowflake seems to be one of those terms that is really only said behind one's back....you know, one of those terms that no one really has the courage to say unless the accused is not around. It is said in safe groups and in safe distances...let face it, it is an insult, and if one actually used the term to describe a child directly to a parent, one had better be ready to pull back her hair and kick off her heels because the conversation might get ugly from there......