What do you think of this gift request? Update...No Wii

[Skywalker]

Got an email this morning from a family member. It says that they have decided to buy their children a Wii for Christmas, and that if each family member contributes "at least" $20 they would be able to purchase it. It says if they can't collect enough they won't be able to afford the Wii. It also says if they collect "too much" they will use the overage for games.

At this stage I have already purchased gifts for their kids and I am not interested in pitching in another $20.

It seems so rude to me to request this.

Am I wrong here or just a scrooge? (yeah I could be both)

 

[wdwfan16]

If they want their kids to have a WII then they have to pay for it.

So you can send them money and they get ti give the gift?

 

[DWGal210]

Some people....

You are NOT the Scrooge here. It's VERY rude for them to send such an email. If they can't afford to buy their kids a Wii, they don't need to be buying it.

Now, I think it's different if you approached the parents and said, "What would little Susie like for Christmas?" and the parents told you, "Well, we are getting them the Wii, so if you'd like, a game would be nice." To me, that's different. Mostly because in that scenario, you the gift giver initiate the gift conversation.

BUT to ask people for money?!?!?! Good lord, no way in heck!!

 

[holycow]

Rude!

A gift is a gift! What is up with people?

I'd just decline but the problem is they will probably return the gifts you got them!

 

[DWGal210]

Another thought....

I hate that they are guilting you....by saying "If we don't collect the money, our kids don't get the gift" is trying to weasle you into feeling bad that their kiddos might not get what they want. Which, of course, is not your problem, but they are trying to make it your problem.

Geesh, some people.....

 

[spacemermaid]

You're not a "Scrooge", especially since you'd already got them presents BEFORE their parents made such a...BOLD request!

 

[justhat]

I think that is crazy. It would be one thing if they said "We scraped together every dime we had and got the kids a Wii, but can't afford any games. If you are wondering what our kids would like for Christmas, Wii games would be great!" I wouldn't be offended at all and you're still free to buy what you want, but the suggestion is there. But to contribute money so you can help them buy a gift, that's just weird.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

They were rude.

Had you asked them--then it would not have been rude except that they mentioned a specific dollar amount.

But for them to volunteer this information unsolicited, tacky tacky tacky.

But in the end, they'll probably consider you a scrooge anyway. But I'd be okay with that if I were in your shoes.

 

[Skywalker]

Another thought....

I hate that they are guilting you....by saying "If we don't collect the money, our kids don't get the gift" is trying to weasle you into feeling bad that their kiddos might not get what they want. Which, of course, is not your problem, but they are trying to make it your problem.

Geesh, some people.....

And that's what bothered me a lot too! The whole "if you don't contribute you'll ruin Christmas vibe" that I got from it.

Would you all respond to that email or just ignore it?

 

[justhat]

The other thing I would be interested in knowing is that while they said what they would do if they got "too much" money, what happens if they don't get enough? Are they refunding everyone? Keeping the cash for themselves?

 

[Kim&Chris]

Wow, people have guts, don't they??? That is unbelievable.

So...you donate the money and THEY get to give the kid the Wii?

 

[wenrob]

And that's what bothered me a lot too! The whole "if you don't contribute you'll ruin Christmas vibe" that I got from it.

Would you all respond to that email or just ignore it?

As someone who has received similar emails (3yrs in a row!) from my brother's wife and having a nasty email battle, I say ignore it. Telling them that it's rude and out of line just doesn't sink in. The attitude is why shouldn't my kids get what they want? Just act like you never got it. I bet anything they won't get many takers.

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

In answer to your question whether to respond, I'd probably send something so that they don't expect the $20.

"Good luck on getting the Wii. We already got the gifts so we won't be giving any additional $"

 

[2binak]

And that's what bothered me a lot too! The whole "if you don't contribute you'll ruin Christmas vibe" that I got from it.

Would you all respond to that email or just ignore it?

Well, I'm bold, so I would definitely respond and I would say, "I've already selected, purchased and wrapped gifts for everyone. I hope you can find a way to buy the Wii so that you don't disappoint your children."

There's no way would I feel guilty because they didn't plan ahead and save to buy their kids a big gift. I would totally turn the guilt trip back on them. Who waits until 4 days before Christmas to decide to buy a gift like that anyway? Like a pp said, I'd be interested in knowing what they plan to do with the cash if they don't get enough to buy the game system.

 

[HeatherC]

That is hysterical! No really. I cannot believe the nerve of people. I would just send them an email back saying you'd love to give them the $20 if they don't mind chipping in $20 to get your kids a gift as well.

 

[ols386]

I would politely resond back by telling them you already have purchased the gifts, and that you are not going to be able to contibute the $20.

Personally, I like it when people give me a list, or tell me specifically what they want for Christmas....that way I know I'm giving them something that they will use, and I won't have wasted my money. But if they are going to tell me something specific, I'd like to know it well in advance, before I start my holiday shopping.

 

[luvsJack]

I think these parents are rude and awfully bold to even suggest such a thing. But, otoh, if they don't get enough for a wii; what will the kids get for Christmas? I mean, will they use the money for other things? Is it just that they can't afford a wii or is it that they haven't been able to come up with the money to buy them anything for Christmas? This would be a awfully strange way to ask for help, but maybe they are ashamed to admit they can't buy anything?

 

[LuvBaloo]

That is crazy! Its an obvious attempt to use guilt to get people to pitch in for their poor planning. If they truly can't afford to do the Wii, then they shouldn't do it. Speaking as someone who didn't get expensive toys, kids can handle not getting the cool thing.

I think its fine for parents to give people ideas what to buy their kids, but it should be done politely and usually its done when people are asking for ideas.

As a PP suggested, I'd send a note back that since you are already done your Christmas shopping, you won't be pitching in for this.

 

[java]

WHAT? How close a relative is it? If it was my brother or sister sending that I'd be on the phone with them already saying how rude that was.

If they want to buy their kids a wii- go buy it. Don't ask everyone else to buy your kids a wii. ugh some people.

 

[anniemae]

wow. just wow.

Did they just send this e-mail???? It's like 4 days until Christmas!!

I would just tell them you already bought and wrapped gifts. How many people were on the e-mail?