What do you think matters most?

[BabyPiglet]

I'm reading a book, and talking with Sonya about something that inspired this thread. Do you think it matters more about the thoughts that go through your head, or if you choose to act on them?

Like, the definition of prejudice is sometimes thinking that a certain group is below you. Just thinking, but you know that it's wrong so you keep the thoughts to yourself.

Discrimination is acting on those thoughts.

Do you think it matters if someone laughs silently in their head about an outfit a fellow classmate is wearing? They aren't actively taunting the person about it, because they know that'd be wrong.

Thoughts?

 

[imabrat]

Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit! I've inspired a thread!

Anyways, one of my biggest faults is judging people. I try to stop, but I can't help it.
I think it's acting upon those thoughts that matters. Sure, I'll say in my head "OH MY GWAD WHAT IS SHE WEARING?!" but I wouldn't say it out loud.

 

[DramaQueen]

Okay, not entirely sure if I'm going to answer your questions, but I'm going to put my 2 cents in on the topic.

I think there certainly is a difference between your personal prejudices and acting on them (ie discriminating)
I must admit, I have my own personal prejudices, we ALL do, but by not acting on them, I don't think I'm doing any harm. I KNOW it's wrong to think some of the things that I do, but in life I try to keep my prejudices to myself and try to see past them when interacting with people.

People who act on their prejudices (ie racists, homophobes, sexists etc) are OBVIOUSLY doing something wrong--no matter WHAT kind of spin they try to put on it.
I know it's not okay to be prejudice, but I suppose people who blatantly discriminate either don't know or don't care that it's not okay?

Haha I don't know if that made any sense...but that's my thinking.
Maybe once others reply it'll get my brain juices going a bit more.

 

[Babyjustrun]

I am quick to judge in my mind, but after a while, I think about it and correct myself.

I think that our thoughts matter in how we see ourselves and our relationship with our conscience. If we can't respect ourselves, who can?

And then the things we act upon, they matter too, but mostly for others. The stuff we decide to react to, or share our opinions about, is what creates our relationships with others. You don't always say what's on your mind, so you selectively choose what thoughts are best for what person.

 

[chisnpeke]

I judge people by how they present themselves. If they have greasy, unwashed hair, a bunch of wrinkled clothes that don't fit properly I judge them. It's not right but I honestly can't help it, it's part of being human. If they look terrible I judge them. I don't say anything so I don't think I'm doing harm to anyone but myself.

 

[DramaQueen]

I judge people by how they present themselves. If they have greasy, unwashed hair, a bunch of wrinkled clothes that don't fit properly I judge them. It's not right but I honestly can't help it, it's part of being human. If they look terrible I judge them. I don't say anything so I don't think I'm doing harm to anyone but myself.

Yup, It's definitely part of being human.
I think the difference between someone who judges & someone who discriminates (IMHO) is that someone who discriminates doesn't realize it's wrong to judge/doesn't think they are judging(/prejudice)

 

[ohdisco]

Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit! I've inspired a thread!

I call joo a biscuit.

Actions mean much more than thoughts. I judge, but I keep it to myself.

 

[BabyPiglet]

As humans, we all judge. I think showing that you can control yourself is what matters most.

My book says that good and bad people judge, good people just know that it's wrong so they keep it to themselves.

We all have slip ups, but ultimately its about balancing the id, ego, and superego.

Id - Being greedy and indulging yourself in whatever you want.
Superego - Being 100% true, good, and honest.
Ego - The balance between the two.

(sociology pwns.)

 

[pigletgirl]

Ooooh thats a tough question IMO!

At first I thought actions because people can see what you did, but also thoughts make you do those actions, so maybe thoughts matter most?

I don't know. I'm interested to see what others have to say.

 

[DramaQueen]

As humans, we all judge. I think showing that you can control yourself is what matters most.

My book says that good and bad people judge, good people just know that it's wrong so they keep it to themselves.

We all have slip ups, but ultimately its about balancing the id, ego, and superego.

Id - Being greedy and indulging yourself in whatever you want.
Superego - Being 100% true, good, and honest.
Ego - The balance between the two.

(sociology pwns.)

yay freud!

 

[bananda]

sometimes i can't help having judgemental thoughts. if i realise that im judging people i try to change my thoughts and find something good about the person. i do that because i know that if i continue judging, eventually it will come out, like i might accidentally say or do something offensive.

i think that thoughts are worse, all actions require some amount of thought. JMO

 

[questionmark]

I think Actions are infinitely more important. Your thoughts are your own, and while you can't control them you can control who knows about them.

what book are you reading?

 

[BabyPiglet]

I think Actions are infinitely more important. Your thoughts are your own, and while you can't control them you can control who knows about them.

what book are you reading?

It's something like 'Inside the mind of a serial killer.' It's in the other room and I don't feel like looking for it, lol.

And Caitlin, oh yeah. Sigmund's the best.

 

[Sparx]

its not who you are underneath, its what you do that defines you.

 

[Sparx]

As humans, we all judge. I think showing that you can control yourself is what matters most.

My book says that good and bad people judge, good people just know that it's wrong so they keep it to themselves.

We all have slip ups, but ultimately its about balancing the id, ego, and superego.

Id - Being greedy and indulging yourself in whatever you want.
Superego - Being 100% true, good, and honest.
Ego - The balance between the two.

(sociology pwns.)

thats not technically sociology. its personality psychology.

 

[BabyPiglet]

thats not technically sociology. its personality psychology.

Yes, lol. I realized that after Caitlin's post reminded me that it was Freud's theory.

To be fair, I did learn it in my sociology class, so that counts for something.

 

[BabyPiglet]

Okay, how about this.

What if someone ran a non-profit organization for social equality concerning race. Secretly though she sometimes had slightly rascist thoughts. Would that make her a hypocrite, or just human? Would it even matter if she had this amazing organization that's made leaps for equality, because she herself didn't always believe it?

 

[My Wild Love]

Okay, how about this.

What if someone ran a non-profit organization for social equality concerning race. Secretly though she sometimes had slightly rascist thoughts. Would that make her a hypocrite, or just human? Would it even matter if she had this amazing organization that's made leaps for equality, because she herself didn't always believe it?

Both, a hypocrite for not always believe in the cause and human for having those thoughts.

 

[saratogadreamin09]

I'm reading a book, and talking with Sonya about something that inspired this thread. Do you think it matters more about the thoughts that go through your head, or if you choose to act on them?

Like, the definition of prejudice is sometimes thinking that a certain group is below you. Just thinking, but you know that it's wrong so you keep the thoughts to yourself.

Discrimination is acting on those thoughts.

Do you think it matters if someone laughs silently in their head about an outfit a fellow classmate is wearing? They aren't actively taunting the person about it, because they know that'd be wrong.

Thoughts?

I dont think its bad unless you do something or say something. We all have bad thoughts go through our heads but that doesnt make you a bad person.

IMO thats what seperates the good and bad. If you choose to act on a bad thought then your "bad" but if you dont then your "good"

 

[DramaQueen]

Okay, so sorry to bring the thread back from the dead...but I had a REALLY interesting expirience regarding this concept.
This is probably going to be a long story, but I figured I'd share it cuz it really made me think...


quick BG info:
So in my uni there is this theatre specialist program, it's really hard to get into and they have a really rigorous schedule and it's a small group of about 30 people who are always together. Well I'm not in that program, but I'm doing a theatre major, so I have alot of classes with them. In this one class we're doing really contraversial performances (i won't tell you the rest of the assignment cuz it doesnt matter)
ANYWAYS, our class is VERY divided between TDS (theatre program) and non-TDS (me) students.

In the performance today, the group was stopping people at the door and checking to see if peoples names were "on the VIP list" to get into the performance. The non-TDS students names were not on the list so we had to wait outside the theatre (there's only about 8 of us). They told us there was not enough seats for us so we'd have to stand in the back (there were tons of seats left, but they made us stand @ the back) They did a comedia Dell Arte performance of The Importance of Being Earnest, there was one person in he group who was a non-TDSer and they manipulated the text so that so that it was mocking him.
When they performance ended we were sent outside to complete a questionnaire, then the TDS stdents were led back in. The rest of us were told to stand in a straight line outside the door, they then put blindfolds on us, told us to hold hands and led us into the theatre---on stage. They put us in a circle facing out and told us to take off our blindfolds.
When we did, we were faced with the group of TDS students making an outer circle facing us.
They did the performance again, but during it the TDS kids were given lines by the group to say ridiculing the non-TDS students in the class. (saying that we were stupid or terrible actors or that we didn't belong there or that they were better than us etc.) Then the TDS students walked around us and were led back into the audience. The lights went down.

During the class discussion we found out that those were all actually things that were said about us by the TDS students at one point in time!

So, it got me thinking about the "line". I had NO idea these people were saying things like that about us, or that they had any sort of 'prejudice' (if you can call it that?) about us. I know that they all probably secretly thought they were better than us, but it was surprising to know these things were really said. It really hit close to home, and sort of humiliated me. (which, i believe was the point of the piece...but that's beside the point)

The point I'm trying to make is that during the discussion the TDS students tried to defend themselves saying that those things were taken out of context or that they were "joking", so if someone says discriminatory (racist, sexist, etc) and says they aren't racist/sexist and that they are joking...where is the line?

I dunno if you guys are at all interested in talking about this anymore, but it REALLY got me thinking and wanting to talk about it. And I immediately thought of this thread hehe