What do you think about this?

[Desnik]

My mothers BFF has a DD who is in her late 20's. Her and her boyfriend dated for 3 years, got engaged and the wedding is in 2 weeks. 2 weeks ago was the bridal shower and the bride to be was so happy and excited about her wedding, naturally. This wedding is costing her parents $60,000! A few days ago she was on her way to pick up her dress when her fiancee called her on her cell. He tells her he can't marry her, he wants to break up because there is no passion in the relationship. Might I add that he went to Vegas for his bachelor party and was back maybe a few days before calling her to dump her. This poor girl has had a breakdown and is now highly medicated. Her sister had to pick up her dress and make all the phone calls to the 300 guests telling them that the wedding is off. The mother is so distraught she can't tlk to anyone.

While I think it is probably a blessing in disguise and it's better to do it now than after marrying her but, if you were with someone for 3 years don't you owe them the decency to break up with them in person? Don't you know something is wrong in the relationship before it's 2 weeks before the wedding? How do you stand there during all the planning and watching her parents dish out all this money and not say anything?

 

[AKL_Megs]

Sounds fishy.

I'm not buying it. He called and "dumped" her and that was the end of it?

 

[Desnik]

Sounds fishy.

I'm not buying it. He called and "dumped" her and that was the end of it?

Yep! I'm thinking he had a little too much fun in Vegas.

 

[Melmac]

My mothers BFF has a DD who is in her late 20's. Her and her boyfriend dated for 3 years, got engaged and the wedding is in 2 weeks. 2 weeks ago was the bridal shower and the bride to be was so happy and excited about her wedding, naturally. This wedding is costing her parents $60,000! A few days ago she was on her way to pick up her dress when her fiancee called her on her cell. He tells her he can't marry her, he wants to break up because there is no passion in the relationship. Might I add that he went to Vegas for his bachelor party and was back maybe a few days before calling her to dump her. This poor girl has had a breakdown and is now highly medicated. Her sister had to pick up her dress and make all the phone calls to the 300 guests telling them that the wedding is off. The mother is so distraught she can't tlk to anyone.

While I think it is probably a blessing in disguise and it's better to do it now than after marrying her but, if you were with someone for 3 years don't you owe them the decency to break up with them in person? Don't you know something is wrong in the relationship before it's 2 weeks before the wedding? How do you stand there during all the planning and watching her parents dish out all this money and not say anything?

Wow ... I am sorry for your friend's DD. I do believe it is a blessing in disguise and definitely better now than after they got married. I am sure she won't see it that way for a long time though.

To answer your question, yes, I do feel that after 3 years of dating + an engagement, he should have met with her in person to end things. He was taking the cowardly way out. Just before I went to university, my boyfriend of 2.5 years broke up with me over the phone - I think I was more mad that he couldn't give me the courtesy of meeting with me than the actual breakup.

 

[PatsMom]

I know someone that got a text message from her husband one day that just said "I want a divorce. Call a lawyer." End of story. Husband never came home except to pick up his clothes while she was at work one day.

They have a young child - not so young now but probably around 4 or 5 at the time of the divorce. I thought that text message was the coldest thing I had ever heard of anyone doing!

 

[kirbsam]

i agree that there is much more to the story...

 

[Jennasis]

I'm sure there's much more, and I understand how distraught the young lady must be.

I'm sure it doesn't seem like a blessing in disguise but it certainly was. The guy was a spineless wuss to break up that way...but she should thank her lucky stars he did her this favor. I'm betting someday she will realize this.

 

[AKL_Megs]

Yep! I'm thinking he had a little too much fun in Vegas.

Yeah, okay, that's fine and all, but who in their right mind just ACCEPTS a phone call? I'd want to talk in person, even if it WAS the end.

And if I had $60,000 on the line like her parents, you can bet your butt I'd be on his doorstep looking for an explanation ASAP.

 

[okeydokey]

I wonder if the family can sue him for the lost money spent for the wedding. That would be an interesting Judge Judy.

 

[a1tinkfans]

sad, but better now than later.
And as to his behavior, awful....me thinks there is more to this story....cold feet aside.........

sorry for the girl, and almost
even sorrier for the parents that shelled out the money...she will in time get over this...and she will be happy that she is not with a man that would be so disrespectful to both her and her family...
But again....I had a family member that called off a wedding three weeks out, (in person) but three weeks out.......and the guy was awfully Devastated................but as she said, she just knew it was a mistake and could not go forward with it.....

 

[Rora]

I'm sure there's much more, and I understand how distraught the young lady must be.

I'm sure it doesn't seem like a blessing in disguise but it certainly was. The guy was a spineless wuss to break up that way...but she should thank her lucky stars he did her this favor. I'm betting someday she will realize this.

This.

I can't even imagine how devestated this girl must be right now.

 

[mamacatnv]

2 weeks beats being left standing at the altar. I agree it was somewhat cowardly to do it on the phone but who knows what all has gone on. Maybe he has hemmed and hawed and she has pushed or visversa.

 

[Handbag Lady]

Oh, that poor woman. I think he is a cad for not doing it in person. If it came out of the blue like it sounds, how else could the lady take it? If it is over, it is over. What an awful way to do it, too.

 

[happygirl]

I wonder if the family can sue him for the lost money spent for the wedding. That would be an interesting Judge Judy.

There was a show on this very topic on Dr, Phil where the groom called off the wedding the day of the wedding, the bride took him to court and she won he had to pay for everything, since he broke the "contract" but he never paid, it really hard to get money from that guy,

 

[cm8]

That is so sad to hear. I pray that she will get better in time and heal completely from what has transpired. It will be a long time before she will gain her sense of normalcy.

 

[beatlesblonde]

That's terrible, I feel sorry for the girl. The same thing happened to my BFF two years ago, her fiance broke up with her a month before their wedding, except he had his pastor do it for him. A couple of weeks after what would have been their wedding day we catch wind of him hanging out with some new girl calling her his "pumpkin" and other pet names. A year later he and his new girl get married. So yes it was a blessing in disguise that this happened before they got married but it still hurt her a lot. Luckily she's moved on, went back to school and now has a new guy who treats her much better.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Wow, that is just awful. It is all for the best in the end.

 

[Mary•Poppins]

What a sad story. However, I do agree with a lot of the posters ... better now then later.

... and what a jerk to not break it off in person!

 

[mickeysgal]

What a sad, sad story. However, be happy it happened this way before a bitter, sad marriage and/or kids to boot.

Hopefully the parents can recoup some of the $60,000. Poor thing...

 

[DisneyMama629]

i agree that there is much more to the story...

What more do you think there is? People actually do that. My husband did it to me after 5 years of marriage. He just blindsided me one day and said he wanted a divorce. He left and never came back.

Yeah, okay, that's fine and all, but who in their right mind just ACCEPTS a phone call? I'd want to talk in person, even if it WAS the end.

And if I had $60,000 on the line like her parents, you can bet your butt I'd be on his doorstep looking for an explanation ASAP.

I agree that they may want an explanation, but that doesn't mean he'll give one. When my ex blindsided me with a divorce, my dad tried to talk to him, but there was no explanation other than, I just want a divorce and you can't stop me.

People can be cruel. I agree that it's better now than after the wedding. Apparently I was married for five years to someone who felt that he "settled" for me.