We Are SUNK - Any Advice?

[mrsklamc]

I
Dentists won't...not any I know of, at least.

Maybe that's unique to your region? I've done it 3 times w/ 3 dentists in 3 different states.

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

Dentists won't...not any I know of, at least.

Some do, I just had a root canal and crown and my dentist let me make payments without interest.

 

[mrsklamc]

OP- any chance there's any scrap metal on your property?

Also we were very poor and very rural when I was a kid, we used to walk the ditches and pick up aluminum cans to sell.

 

[Jeff_G]

My oldest has been eligible to get a drivers permit for almost a year and hasn't been able to go because we can't afford the bump in insurance. We toyed with the idea that he get a job to help pay for insurance/gas, but haven't found anything that would even pay enough to cover that. If he works 4 hours at a time @ $8/hr, thats $36. If it costs us $20 in gas to get him to work and bac....doesn't make much financial sense. He says he is OK with not driving, but I can see his heart breaking when others his age are driving and he isn't. He didn't ask for any of this mess, yet he is paying a price for it. There are days when I feel like the meanest mother in the world.

When I was 15 / 16 my mother could not afford to add me to her insurance either much less any thought of providing me a car. She made it clear I would need to have a job making enough money to pay for my own car plus insurance and gas. I didn't drive until I was 18 /19 and you know what it didn't hurt me one bit. If anything I respected my car more so since I was footing the bill.

 

[C.Ann]

OP - could you please explain how "one" payment is going to fix all of the issues you are currently having? I'm very confused by what you have posted here and what you have posted on the CB..

I think you said there is you, your DH, 2 teens, & an 11 year old - right? So let's say 4 of you are capable of doing some of the tons of suggestions here and on the CB - which seems very doable to me.. Couldn't 4 people come up with that one payment you need to set everything straight? Or am I missing something important that indicates none of you can do anything at all - in addition to what you're doing now?

_________________________________________________________________________________________

ETA: Someone just explained to me on your thread on the CB that it's not a one time payment - but rather consolidating debt so you will have only one payment a month.. Now it finally makes sense to me..

However, you still seem very resistant to make any of the necessary changes suggested here; get your teens involved in earning money; having your DH take odd jobs on the side; or bringing in additional income on your end, so I'm not sure how you're hoping to solve this problem..

Whatever the case may be, I hope you can find a way to work out your financial issues..

 

[arminnie]

We do have income, its just not enough to cover everything anymore. We have looked at downsizing our home, but there's not really anything to downsize to. Our home is only worth $120,000. Isn't much you can find for less than that amount.

When income is less than outgo - SOMETHING has to change. You just cannot do this indefinitely. Sometimes the things that change are not pleasant at all.

What you cannot do is pretend that your living standard is going to remain the same if you cannot increase income and just keep doing what you are doing now.

It sounds like you live in an area with very few opportunities. This would be one of the first things I would look at for long-term sustainability. There are jobs and housing (yes even less than $120,000) in many parts of the U.S. You obviously want to live where you are - but maybe that is just not going to be possible.

It will not permanently scar your children to have to do without some of the things they are used to. If anything it may motivate them to make choices in life to try to avoid this type of situation.

 

[disneyofcourse]

Honestly if the kids are old enough to get some kind of part time work-Have them do that. Also, let them know the situation and find ways as a family to keep costs down.

Start selling things that you can live without and putting every penny into paying things off.

Get some work cleaning houses at night and on weekends. One of my girl friends is having a really hard time after losing her job and this is what she did. She also sold her gas guzzlers and bought a small new Chevy that gets her 40mpg compared to her gas hog. Over 60 months of payments and less gas per month she is coming out ahead. She got a part time retail job at a craft store within two weeks of getting let go. You just need to be able to take what comes and whats available. She sold her home for pretty much what she paid(if not a little less) and is renting in a different area for hundreds less than her mortgage. And she even got another single mother to move in and share the space with her and her 2 kids. Bringing someone else in pays for all the utilities and some other bills.

Sometimes even if you mean well with getting a house refinanced you just end up in the same situation because you never changed anything about your spending habits. Just saying this from what I've personally seen with my own family members. If you start actually cutting things out and working harder now you'll probably see better results than just refinancing in your future. .

 

[tlenzendorf]

I do stuff like online surveys to earn extra cash and get gas cards. If you have access to the internet it's easy to do. Even if you can only do it at lunch at work you can make a small chunk of money per month. I average anywhere between $15-50/month.

 

[Kellydelly]

Your only option is to cut your spending . You can't move (and why would you with both of you gainfully employed), you can't drive the kids around to nonexistent jobs and pay for extra gas, you apparently can't find extra jobs for you and your spouse.You can't refinance because you aren't in good standing with your creditors. You are stuck, so get some credit counseling and cut your variable spending so you can apply it to your bills.

As for the dental thing, I am shocked that anyone without dental coverage didn't sign up for a discount dental program or find a dental school instead of shelling out $7,000 to a dentist on their cc . There are all kinds of discount dental programs in my area, and across the country. You need to investigate what you can do in the future to avoid that kind of expense. We used Careington when my husband lost his job 3 yrs ago. It cut our dental expenses in half and only cost us $69 for the whole family to be in the program for a year. When you don't have money you need to be wise how you spend it.

 

[Mom2Ben02]

Just read through all the replies, and did not see this mentioned...

I had a 2000 Grand Caravan that was paid for. It was in bad shape, but I could not afford a payment. However, it finally died, and I had no choice. Sold it for scrap, and bought a 2010 Kia Soul with 12,000 miles on it. After my down payment, my monthly payment is $204/mo. On the flip side, the cost of gas went down $150. So, for a real cost of $50/mo, I now have a reliable car with little to no monthly upkeep charges...AND all the windows go up and down!

I told a friend this, and she bought a Ford Fiesta for her work commute. Her payment and gas savings are even better.

 

[mefordis]

I haven't read all the pages in this thread but if it hasn't already been mentioned, go to your library and check out Dave Ramsey's book, Total Money Makeover. Best common sense advice out there IMO.

Also check out his radio show, I'm sure it is on in your area on some radio station. I love listening to the callers and the advice he gives.

 

[minnie1928]

What's you tax situation typically like? Do you usually get a refund? If so, have you adjusted your withholdings to lower the amount of your refund and get the money in your hands faster?

Could your 17yr old offer tutoring to younger kids? I also second the online survey suggestion, my mom makes an easy $75/month on surveys.

I also recommend Consumer Credit Counseling Services (now Apprise?). They did wonders for my parents when they needed it.

Do you have access to...I forget what it's called, but I know someone here will remember...it's the thing where you get a box full of food for around $30. It's open to anyone, it's not income based.

Good luck and lots of

 

[manning]

Come spring and you are still struggling consider this

If you have a yard put in raised gardens(s). You will be surprised what you can raise in those and every bit helps.

 

[bumbershoot]

Maybe that's unique to your region? I've done it 3 times w/ 3 dentists in 3 different states.

Some do, I just had a root canal and crown and my dentist let me make payments without interest.

Interesting. All of them here want to put you on Care Credit, or Credit Care, which is just like a credit card. I can't remember if they had interest, but you had to apply for it. It's what they (eye doctor, not tooth doctor, of course, LOL) wanted me to do when I had Lasik done, and I didn't qualify b/c they were rigorous in who they gave credit to.




The food box thing is Angel Food Ministries, I think?

 

[Karenj2]

OK, at least I can take a deep breath after talking to everyone here this morning. It's been non-stop tears for the past 24 hours. My boss at work thought someone had died when I walked into work this morning.
Thanks for the ideas, and keep them coming. I'm compiling a list to work on with DH!

How approachable is your boss? Would it be possible to work more hours at your job? Could you ask for a raise? (If you've been a good employee, of course.)

Our company's business is tied into the housing market, and there are quite a few people in our workplace that have taken second jobs. The two I know best both work FT at our place (35-40 hours a week), then they also work PT elsewhere; one at Walmart, the other at Cracker Barrel. It's hard on them, but it's what they need to do.

 

[moonpie85]

Interesting. All of them here want to put you on Care Credit, or Credit Care, which is just like a credit card. I can't remember if they had interest, but you had to apply for it. It's what they (eye doctor, not tooth doctor, of course, LOL) wanted me to do when I had Lasik done, and I didn't qualify b/c they were rigorous in who they gave credit to.




The food box thing is Angel Food Ministries, I think?

Yeah Care Credit. It's a credit card and they run a special no interest if paid in 6 months type of thing but bottom line it is a credit card. And here that's the only option.

I have searched and searched for a dentist that will do a payment plan and haven't had any luck. They all hand you a brochure for this. I finally broke down and got the card since my wisdom teeth were killing me

BTW before this causes any confusion I'm another MoonPie not OP

 

[moonpie85]

Oh and sadly Angel Food Ministeries closed its doors for good a few months ago. But OneHarvest (oneharvest.com) opened its doors this week in the Southeast and is hoping to be nationwide by Spring.

It may be something to keep in mind

 

[Marionnette]

Just read through all the replies, and did not see this mentioned...

I had a 2000 Grand Caravan that was paid for. It was in bad shape, but I could not afford a payment. However, it finally died, and I had no choice. Sold it for scrap, and bought a 2010 Kia Soul with 12,000 miles on it. After my down payment, my monthly payment is $204/mo. On the flip side, the cost of gas went down $150. So, for a real cost of $50/mo, I now have a reliable car with little to no monthly upkeep charges...AND all the windows go up and down!

I told a friend this, and she bought a Ford Fiesta for her work commute. Her payment and gas savings are even better.

How does it make sense for the OP to take on any additional debts?

And that would be assuming that she could even get approved for a car loan. As bad as it sounds, she's pretty much stuck with the gas guzzling truck unless it can be sold and a clunker with better gas efficiency can be bought for the same price.

 

[Marionnette]

OP, if you cannot make more money, then you have to spend less. There is no other answer. No magic wand or silver bullet is going to change that fact.

So, get yourself to a credit counselor. They can strong arm your credit card companies to lower your interest rates. They can negotiate with your cell phone company to drop your plan or change it without changing your contract renewal date.

Get in touch with your county's social services for food banks and help with heating oil. Ask your pastor or priest for help thru your church. Maybe they have gas cards or grocery cards that they can give you. Maybe there is a mechanic in your church who is willing to repair the second car in exchange for some work that your husband can do for him? Like a barter for services?

All you need is just a little breathing room until your husband's work picks up. You say that you make too much to qualify for some assistance but you will never know for sure until you make the application.

The worst thing that you can do is to throw your hands up in the air and say that you are sunk. You aren't. You are merely treading water. I've seen people who were in worse shape than you pull themselves up.

 

[Darcy03231]

OP: Please do not take this personal, I am just trying to explain to you why you will get some answers that seem strange to you. Also, with your situation, what we have been talking about may help you keep money or items you may have donated that were not really on the up/up. We wan't all posters to be safe from scams.

We have a thread (well had) re: scams that can happen at Christmas time on the Disboards. It was to remind everyone that the best place to go if you are having a hard time during the holidays or ANYTIME, is your local agencies, food banks, and churches etc. While we are not calling you out to be doing this, you will get posts referring to it. I don't know what to call it, but sometimes the posters before you have jaded the readers that are here now. I hope that makes some sense. We all look out for "signs" like poor little johnny, no Christmas for him, how heartbreaking it is for you as a parent. While all that is very legitimate to the posts (I am not talking about this thread, just in general terms), we all have to look out for each other. While this thread is not really like that, you can use a lot of the suggestions we all have come up with. And as always, we should always remember that we don't know who is on the other side of an internet board, please give locally to charities in your neighborhood.

You have received some excellent idea's here and on the Community Board. I hope that your family gets out of it's current situation. I would have your DS16 doing work around the neighborhood to get his permit, then practice on days when you would already be using the car. Once he gets his license he really does not have to be put on your insurance. Our DD19 has had hers since 17 but since she in college with no need for a vehicle, she just doesn't drive. She is fine with that. Kids are usually great, they adjust!

This depends on your state. Our state requires that all licensed drivers in your home be on your insurance (or have their own).