Washing Feet at Wedding

[RUDisney]

I went to a wedding recently and the bride and groom washed each other's feet on the altar. The minister said something about it showing subservience to one another in marriage.

Anyone ever heard of this who can give a better explanation?

I've never seen nor heard of it before.

But, at the same wedding, the bride returned her promise ring to her parents because the promise had been fulfilled and then she got her first kiss when the minister pronounced them man and wife.

There were plenty of firsts about this wedding for me.

 

[ilovepcot]

Did this wedding take place at a Seventh Day Adventist church? Reason I ask is that they practice foot washing. I'm not of that faith, however. I suspect there are other religions that practice this as well...just not aware of them specifically.


ETA: I could go into why they practice this, however, it would get into religion which is not allowed here.

 

[bombygriz]

.

 

[bdcp]

This sounds like a wedding in an evangelical non-denominational church. I have attended weddings very similar. The promise ring has to do with purity and saving oneself for marriage which is a good thing. Definitely no baggage brought into the relationship. Definitely MY style but that's not what it's about. It's about faith and beliefs and NO ONE should make fun of it.

Subservience doesn't mean what so many seem to think it means. It's about respect and honor.

 

[Scurvy]

I've seen this done, though not at a wedding. It's basically something that is intended to symbolize that neither person is superior to the other, and that they should serve each other. The basis for it is a story in the Bible.

 

[WowLookAtThat]

I've heard of the foot washing in a wedding. A friend of mine told her they did this at her sister's wedding, but it was an Indian ritual in that case.

It may seem odd to others but there may be more symbolism in it such as water being cleansing or something. It could also been seen as an a gesture of respect.

As for the promise ring thing, I think it is sweet for the couple. It's not my cup of tea but its kind of sweet.

 

[laura.anne]

Uhm...they waited to have their first KISS until the wedding?! I was twelve! Jeez.

That all seems a bit...off. Washing each other's feet as a submission ritual? Primitive.

This seems like a VERY conservative wedding. Not my style, lol.

There are more people than you'd imagine who wait until they're married to have their first kiss. Often it's tied into a religious belief, just like the foot washing. I don't know if I would call it primitive. I think that's a bit offensive.

 

[mhsjax]

This sounds like a wedding in an evangelical non-denominational church. I have attended weddings very similar. The promise ring has to do with purity and saving oneself for marriage which is a good thing. Definitely no baggage brought into the relationship. Definitely MY style but that's not what it's about. It's about faith and beliefs and NO ONE should make fun of it.

Subservience doesn't mean what so many seem to think it means. It's about respect and honor.

I agree, and the only problem I would have with the feet washing, is if only the bride did it to the groom, but if they both do it, they are showing that they don't think more of themselves than they do their partner, I think it is a lovely thought, although I wouldn't want to do it and get my dress all wet. lol

And yes, if it is a Christian wedding then most likely stems from the Bible, that is all I will say on that, anyone that needs info can look it up. Don't want to get into trouble.

 

[RUDisney]

It was in an Episcopal church, but definitely not an Episcopal ceremony. I'm not sure what religion they practice other than they are "Christian". They are both missionaries who spend a lot of time in Israel. From my understanding, they are praying for the fall of Israel because somewhere in Revelation it says that when Israel falls a second time, we will all be raised to Heaven. Yet, in the meantime, they are helping the children there. To me, it's counterintuitive, but I'm not here to judge.

What do I know? I'm Catholic.... we don't actively read the Bible.

 

[bgirldeb]

Interesting! I'm guessing it came from when Jesus washed his disciples feet in the Bible. There it was not so much a matter of subserviency, but humility.

 

[mhsjax]

It was in an Episcopal church, but definitely not an Episcopal ceremony. I'm not sure what religion they practice other than they are "Christian". They are both missionaries who spend a lot of time in Israel. From my understanding, they are praying for the fall of Israel because somewhere in Revelation it says that when Israel falls a second time, we will all be raised to Heaven. Yet, in the meantime, they are helping the children there. To me, it's counterintuitive, but I'm not here to judge.

What do I know? I'm Catholic.... we don't actively read the Bible.

never mind. Was probably considered a religious discussion.

 

[RUDisney]

This sounds like a wedding in an evangelical non-denominational church. I have attended weddings very similar. The promise ring has to do with purity and saving oneself for marriage which is a good thing. Definitely no baggage brought into the relationship. Definitely MY style but that's not what it's about. It's about faith and beliefs and NO ONE should make fun of it.

Subservience doesn't mean what so many seem to think it means. It's about respect and honor.

I've seen this done, though not at a wedding. It's basically something that is intended to symbolize that neither person is superior to the other, and that they should serve each other. The basis for it is a story in the Bible.

I agree, and the only problem I would have with the feet washing, is if only the bride did it to the groom, but if they both do it, they are showing that they don't think more of themselves than they do their partner, I think it is a lovely thought, although I wouldn't want to do it and get my dress all wet. lol

And yes, if it is a Christian wedding then most likely stems from the Bible, that is all I will say on that, anyone that needs info can look it up. Don't want to get into trouble.

This is the type of information that I was pursuing. I DO believe that it was to show respect for an equal partnership... the minister just called it subservience. I think the word has negative connotations.

I didn't like the promise ring being returned at the wedding. None of my business. If they were to return it to her parents, I think it should be done in private. Really, it only led to a lot of discussions at the reception about their wedding night and honeymoon. That was inappropriate, IMO, and could have been avoided if they kept this tidbit between close family.

 

[ilovepcot]

Deleting my post as it was getting "too deep" .

 

[RUDisney]

never mind. Was probably considered a religious discussion.

Your right, but I mean it's counterintuitive to help someone while hoping for their demise. Kind of like me offering you help in carrying your groceries only to get the bag with the eggs in it so I can purposefully drop it and break your eggs.

 

[RUDisney]

Sounds like it was a beautiful ceremony.

It really was. I was just curious about the origins of the foot baths.

 

[mhsjax]

This is the type of information that I was pursuing. I DO believe that it was to show respect for an equal partnership... the minister just called it subservience. I think the word has negative connotations.

I didn't like the promise ring being returned at the wedding. None of my business. If they were to return it to her parents, I think it should be done in private. Really, it only led to a lot of discussions at the reception about their wedding night and honeymoon. That was inappropriate, IMO, and could have been avoided if they kept this tidbit between close family.

I have to agree with you on the promise thing. Although I have no problem in waiting until married for sex, I find it odd that you would never even kiss. Sorry, and I am pretty conservative but I mean what if they are a crappy kisser. lol
As far as returning the ring to the parents , I just creeps me out. I can't explain it, but it does.

 

[mhsjax]

Your right, but I mean it's counterintuitive to help someone while hoping for their demise. Kind of like me offering you help in carrying your groceries only to get the bag with the eggs in it so I can purposefully drop it and break your eggs.

Well think of it as this. Some one is dying, you want to ease their pain, so you may help them by giving them drugs or doing what ever you can for them, but you may pray for their death so they can be free. Probably not the best example, but we can only go so far with this type of discussion.

Also not saying that I agree with praying for their demise. I have things I want to do and the list is very long, but I can see where some may want the end to come quicker than others.

 

[dngnb8]

John 13 - IVP New Testament Commentaries

It has to do with love and respect

 

[aprilgail2]

Uhm...they waited to have their first KISS until the wedding?! I was twelve! Jeez.

That all seems a bit...off. Washing each other's feet as a submission ritual? Primitive.

This seems like a VERY conservative wedding. Not my style, lol.

That is totally bizarre! Both the frist kiss AND the feet washing---I HATE feet so that would gross me out LOL...

It was in an Episcopal church, but definitely not an Episcopal ceremony. I'm not sure what religion they practice other than they are "Christian". They are both missionaries who spend a lot of time in Israel. From my understanding, they are praying for the fall of Israel because somewhere in Revelation it says that when Israel falls a second time, we will all be raised to Heaven. Yet, in the meantime, they are helping the children there. To me, it's counterintuitive, but I'm not here to judge.

What do I know? I'm Catholic.... we don't actively read the Bible.

That is NOT an Episcopal thing--I am not episcopal now but went to that church when I was little and my mom still goes for the past 60 years and she has never even heard of such a thing!

 

[bumbershoot]

Really, it only led to a lot of discussions at the reception about their wedding night and honeymoon. That was inappropriate, IMO, and could have been avoided if they kept this tidbit between close family.

You're assuming that there isn't always talk about honeymoons and wedding nights at receptions. There sure was at mine, with countless people telling us that we had to start having babies NOW.

Heck, my own stepmom asked if I used "protection", while quizzing me on when we'd procreate at the *rehearsal dinner*.

So embarrasing.

Even more embarrassing was when we did, in fact, conceive inside our first week of marriage. (DS is worth the embarrassment, but still...)

That is NOT an Episcopal thing--I am not episcopal now but went to that church when I was little and my mom still goes for the past 60 years and she has never even heard of such a thing!

She did say "but definitely not an Episcopal ceremony".