Was this a bad gift (for 4 yo)?

[ShuisFan584]

I definitely think it was a good gift! The best toys and games for children are educational. Since she doesn't know her letters yet, educational games like that will help her learn!

 

[TSTEWARTFAN]

I agree with everyone else that the game was fine...the parents were just rude. I never would have even given the game a second thought either. My DS started reading at age 3 3/4 years, so I certainly would have consedered Scrabble Jr. for his 4th birthday. Even his cousins and sister would have been ready for the game at 4 yrs. They all knew there letters by that time.

Do not fret. you did fine with the game.

 

[calypso*a*go-go]

Look at it this way -- if they absolutely hated the gift, they probably wouldn't have sent a thank-you note at all.

The next time you see the parents, ask them if DD enjoys playing the game and offer a play-date with your DD if she needs help learning to play it.

 

[dianeschlicht]

I think that was a perfect gift for a 4 YO! Maybe it's the lack of stay at home moms or the lack of Sesame Street and Electric Company now, but both our kids not only knew all their letters by 4, but were reading too!

 

[Hillbeans]

At my son's 3rd b-day he got a toy that was for a 6 month old. I thanked the parents nicely in a note and put the gift in the closet.

I could have said that the toy was one he had when he was little but i'll just give it to Toys for Tots next year.

Incidentally, my son loves letters and has known them since before he was 2. That being said, I still can't get him potty trained....lol.

 

[petula]

I agree with the people who think the note was *trying* to express how very useful the gift would be. And it will. My brother learned not only his letters but a lot of his numbers (scores printed on the tiles) by playing with Scrabble pieces. He was around two or three at the time. Four seems a bit old to be just starting out with letters. Maybe your gift will be her inspiration!

 

[CamColt]

Originally posted by tw1nsmom

Now to play devils advocate about the thank you note. Not everyone is good at expressing what they really mean. Maybe they meant to say is that their daughter doesn't know the alphabet, so this game will be a good tool for learning. .

Thats what I was thinking. Maybe they meant it as a sincere "thank you, the game will be helpful", not as "you got us a no good gift".

Even if they didnt mean it that way I think its a great gift whether the kid knows the letters or not.

 

[missypie]

Some people were just born in a barn and don't know how to write thank you notes. Received this (e-mailed) "thank you" note from SIL, "Thank you for the puzzle. I don't work puzzles so I gave it to your mother."

 

[Bob Slydell]

Originally posted by dianeschlicht
I think that was a perfect gift for a 4 YO! Maybe it's the lack of stay at home moms or the lack of Sesame Street and Electric Company now, but both our kids not only knew all their letters by 4, but were reading too!

Ummm, Sesame Street's still very much going strong.

 

[Kallison]

Well if she doesn't know her letters at 4 then it was an excellent choice of gift.

 

[Barb D]

Every child is different. I have one kid who knew all his letters BEFORE he was two and was reading fluently at 4, one who knew them by 3 or 4 and was beginning reading at 4, and my current 4yo who has very little interest in learning her letters and no interest at all in learning to read. (In fact, we've decided to delay her a year on Kindergarten because she's just not ready.) I don't think she'd have the interest or patience for Boggle, but my other two would have. I'd still say it's a great present for a 4yo, and would have been delighted if someone had given it to any of my kids.

 

[disykat]

Originally posted by dianeschlicht
I think that was a perfect gift for a 4 YO! Maybe it's the lack of stay at home moms or the lack of Sesame Street and Electric Company now, but both our kids not only knew all their letters by 4, but were reading too!

I have to react to your post! I'm a SAHM, the only tv my kids watched prior to age 7 was educational (we didn't have cable). I am a certified teacher and provided my kids with many educational opportunities. As I said previously, neither of my kids were interested in letters at age 4. Neither was firm with their alphabet prior to kindergarten. Both are good students, one of them very good.

While I agree that parents need to provide opportunities for their children to learn, many children are not interested or developmentally ready at that age. I'm getting to the point where I can secretly take pleasure in the fact that my kids are running circles around some of my friend's "little prodigys" who knew their alphabet at 2 or 3.

For anyone reading this worrying that your kids are dumb - don't fret. Early intelligence is not only measured by interest in the alphabet!

 

[nemo1987]

even if the kid didnt know their letters they still could have looked at the letters and matched them up with the correct ones right?? i think that it was an excellent gift. a good tool to learn letters and something they can use to learn more words also. the parents should not have said that in the note they should have just simply said "thank you" or something of the sort. i still think it is a good idea regardless of what the parents think and i would buy it for kids too.
**Sarah**

 

[CEDmom]

Wow, a 4 yo that doesn't know her letters. She's in for a tough time in kindergarten. Anyway, DD actually got this for her 4th birthday. We haven't played it that much but I think it's a good game and one that will be around for several years unlike many toys she has.

 

[disykat]

Originally posted by CEDmom
Wow, a 4 yo that doesn't know her letters. She's in for a tough time in kindergarten. Anyway, DD actually got this for her 4th birthday. We haven't played it that much but I think it's a good game and one that will be around for several years unlike many toys she has.

ERGH! There are lots of 4 year olds that don't know their letters and it doesn't mean they will have a tough time in kindergarten. They might have a tough time if they aren't ready to learn them quickly at 5 when they are in kindergarten though.

 

[aprilgail2]

Originally posted by CEDmom
Wow, a 4 yo that doesn't know her letters. She's in for a tough time in kindergarten. Anyway, DD actually got this for her 4th birthday. We haven't played it that much but I think it's a good game and one that will be around for several years unlike many toys she has.

My daughter goes to pre kindergarten testing next month and one of the things they check is to make sure they know all their letters. They have a pre-k class once a week for the 4 year olds and all the kids have to be able to write at least their first names in there. And they work on writing one letter a week.
As far as kids not knowing their letters because there are less SAHM's.....I am a single working mom ( I work 40 hours a week) my daughter was 4 in Nov. and has known all her letters and numbers from the time she was 2 and is reading now. It all depends on the kids, not always on having a SAHM....I talking to my mom earlier today and I didn't want my daughter to know what I was saying so I said We may do the B-E-A-C-H tomorrow and I hear a little voice say "yippee we are going to the beach tomorrow!" no more spelling words out in front of this one LOL!!

 

[AZKathy]

Originally posted by CEDmom
Wow, a 4 yo that doesn't know her letters. She's in for a tough time in kindergarten. Anyway, DD actually got this for her 4th birthday. We haven't played it that much but I think it's a good game and one that will be around for several years unlike many toys she has.

I don't know if that is so true. Both of my DD's would not sit down and work on their ABC's at that age. I could not for the life of me get them to learn their letters and they did fine in Kindergarten. Some kids are just not ready to learn them at that age while some are. My DS knew them all at 4 and could write his name at 3, but my DD's were very different, yet all have done fine in school.

BTW, your daughter is so cute! I love seeing the pictures of her on your posts! She is a doll!!!!!!!

 

[CEDmom]

Originally posted by aprilgail2
My daughter goes to pre kindergarten testing next month and one of the things they check is to make sure they know all their letters. They have a pre-k class once a week for the 4 year olds and all the kids have to be able to write at least their first names in there. And they work on writing one letter a week.
As far as kids not knowing their letters because there are less SAHM's.....I am a single working mom ( I work 40 hours a week) my daughter was 4 in Nov. and has known all her letters and numbers from the time she was 2 and is reading now. It all depends on the kids, not always on having a SAHM....I talking to my mom earlier today and I didn't want my daughter to know what I was saying so I said We may do the B-E-A-C-H tomorrow and I hear a little voice say "yippee we are going to the beach tomorrow!" no more spelling words out in front of this one LOL!!

My DD also goes to pre-k a few days a week (I work about 21 hrs per week). She's knows her letters and can recognize some words but isn't really reading yet on her own. I don't think in general kids that go to an organized program are behind/ahead of kids that stay home until kindergarten. However, I still think that if a 4 yo doesn't know any letters her parents s/b a little concerned.

 

[disneygals]

In our school district (NY), kids are still taught their letters in kindergarten and don't learn to read until 1st grade. My middle doesn't have the best memory, she didn't learn all her letters until spring of kindergarten, didn't really learn to read until well into 1st grade and now she's in 4th grade getting straight A's.
We would have been hosed if she went to a school that expected reading by kindergarten.

All 3 of my girls resisted "obvious" teaching from me, I had to rely on games, etc.

Original post...I also hope that the note was just worded wrong! I also worry about present-giving too much, it's much easier when the kids are older and can pick out presents for their friends.

 

[skiwee1]

Originally posted by disykat
ERGH! There are lots of 4 year olds that don't know their letters and it doesn't mean they will have a tough time in kindergarten. They might have a tough time if they aren't ready to learn them quickly at 5 when they are in kindergarten though.

I really was surprised to hear that a 4 y/o didn't know their letters. I can honestly say that I have never heard of a 4 y/o not knowing these. All of my kids knew them and could identify them by age 2. DD, now 5, has been writing words for the last year. I think the gift is perfect for the child as she is seriously lacking in that department.