Upset with DD's dance teacher - WWYD?

[kbkids]

I'm just wanting to know if I'm overreacting to this because quite frankly, I do not like her teacher at all, and I don't know if that's clouding my judgement here.

I got back to the dance studio today about 5 minutes early. There's usually a crack in the blinds sometimes and you can peak and watch them practice. Well, DD was sitting in the corner of the room, obviously had been crying, chewing on her fingernails. I thought, well, maybe she got in trouble - though I felt bad for her since she was obviously upset. She sat there the entire time I was watching through the blinds. When class was over, she got up slowly and walked over to the cubbies, put on her shoes, and picked up her dance bag. Her teacher was standing right there, looked down at her and said not a word to her. She walked out the door with her head down, and when she got to the entrance and saw me standing there, she burst into tears. The only thing I could get out of her was that she hurt her leg practicing their splits (essentially pulled a groin muscle) and that her teacher wouldn't let her call me. The teacher never came over to me to tell me anything, and it wasn't like she couldn't see us standing there. So, I finally took DD over to the teacher and asked what had happened. In a nutshell, she had been sitting in the corner crying for over 20 minutes, and she told her just to sit there until it was time to go. DD even saw me drive up and told her I was out there, but she wouldn't let her come to the door. Now, #1, they have my cell phone - call me. #2 - what kind of teacher lets a child leave that got hurt and never attempts to say a word to the parent? She didn't say squat to her when she passed by her leaving - not hope you feel better, nothing!!

Like I said, I already have issues with her because I think she's just rude - and like I said, I'm sure that's clouding my judgement some. But I just forked out $425 for the rest of the class sessions for this spring, another $200 on recital costumes - I think you could treat us with a little bit of compassion. Do I talk to the director tomorrow when we go back for class? I've really had it with this teacher - DD wants to quit (those words have never come from her mouth - this is her 6th year). I just don't want the teacher to take it out on my DD for the rest of the year if I do say something because I see her being the type of person to do just that.

I've already let two rude comments from earlier in the year just go over my head, but I'm pretty much sick of this teacher's attitude. Even today when we were talking, she starts fussing at my DD for not telling the truth - DD said she got hurt at the beginning of class when it "was actually 10 minutes after class started" - what's the difference??

I'm really just angry at her "I don't give a crap" attitude with my DD.

 

[Disney4Drew]

I would be LIVID if my child got hurt and I had to hear about it from my child. You have every right to be angry about that. The teacher should've called you to pick up your DD, AND she should've been there to address you when you arrived. I hope your DD is feeling better.

 

[pearlieq]

NOT cool. I think this would definitely warrant a discussion with the director. Think about the liability this teacher is exposing the studio to as she's ignoring student injuries. If I were the director I'd very much want to hear about the incident!

 

[famofsix]

I am sorry that happenend to you and your DD. I would go to the director tomorrow and explain the situation like you described here ( seeing her through the blinds, that she told the teacher she wanted you to be called and how when you were there she couldn't go to you and how you had to seek the teacher out to find out what happened). Can she switch to another teacher?
Can you get a refund?
If the teacher had explained things to you and showed compassion you would likely feel differently. For some reason this teacher and your child do not connect...and it is obvious to you today. I would definately get the director in on it and see what can be done.At the very least, teach your daughter that if something like this happens again and she knows you are at the studio she has your permission to go to her no matter what and indicate this to the teacher as well. I would stay at the studio from now on and watch.

 

[AZMickeyfans]

Oh my goodness I'm so sorry to hear about that. I hope your daughter's leg feels better soon.

I would definitely speak with the director. See if there are other parents that are as upset as you are and go as a group. Maybe you are not the only one disappointed with the teacher.

My dd is in company at her dance studio and if any of her teachers acted like that or treated her or me like that I would be fuming mad. You have every right to be upset. Not just by the rude comments but your dd being injured. It's unacceptable for the teacher to not let her call you. I could possibly understand if she was upset for just a minute but 20 minutes. That is ridiculous. What if it was something more than a pulled muscle??? She acted very unprofessionally and seems to not care about her students since you said she never said anything to her on the way out. The director absolutely has to know about these behaviors.

To be fussing at her for saying it was at the beginning of the class istead of 10 minutes into it is insane. Isn't 10 minutes still the beginning. Not that it matters.

Does your school have any other classes she could transfer to if the teacher doesn't change? If your daughter truly enjoys dancing then you can't let one bad teacher ruin that for her. If it comes down to it and no one listens I would demand your money back and switch dance schools. It's a shame to treat her that way. I'm so sorry.

 

[kbkids]

I would be LIVID if my child got hurt and I had to hear about it from my child. You have every right to be angry about that. The teacher should've called you to pick up your DD, AND she should've been there to address you when you arrived. I hope your DD is feeling better.

She's feeling fine - Motrin and a warm bath, and she's pretty much back to normal - except she doesn't want to go to dance tomorrow. She's going - it's a different teacher tomorrow, and I want a chance to speak with the director before too much time passes if I'm going to. Tomorrow's teacher actually saw her standing there crying tonight and even came over and asked what was wrong. The one who was there when it happened obviously couldn't care less.

 

[mom2taylorandemily]

That is completely unacceptable behavior on the part of the teacher. She holds some level of liability with this. She is responsible for your daughters care and instruction. I took ballet for 16 years and in all those years never had a teacher hurt me intentionally or otherwise. One year I fell off my pointe shoes and fractured my ankle, my teacher actually called an ambulance and my mother then rode with me to the hospital in the ambulance to make sure that my ankle was stable. That is what a good teacher does, they care about their students. Now, to the training part of this issue, if your daughter is ready to work on her splits, she should be warmed up and never forced to go beyond what her capability is. She should work on it gradually, it doesn't come naturally, your legs don't bend that way.

I would go to the director of the school and demand a reimbursement for costumes and everything. If she is the dir. I would demand an apology and then also request a refund.

Good Luck!!

 

[ilovejack02]

Im all about telling someone when i think they are overreacting I dont think you are in this situation.
I honestly am surprised you didnt FREAK OUT on the woman, but its prob good you didnt. Go to the director and talk to her about it asap.
Someone prob would have had to pull me off of her LOL

 

[JennaTX]

You are absolutely not of line, she was hurt, period.

I would try and calmly talk to the director and explain the situation.

Maybe also talk to the other teacher since she saw what happened.

I am glad your DD is feeling better!

 

[kbkids]

Oh my goodness I'm so sorry to hear about that. I hope your daughter's leg feels better soon.

I would definitely speak with the director. See if there are other parents that are as upset as you are and go as a group. Maybe you are not the only one disappointed with the teacher.

My dd is in company at her dance studio and if any of her teachers acted like that or treated her or me like that I would be fuming mad. You have every right to be upset. Not just by the rude comments but your dd being injured. It's unacceptable for the teacher to not let her call you. I could possibly understand if she was upset for just a minute but 20 minutes. That is ridiculous. What if it was something more than a pulled muscle??? She acted very unprofessionally and seems to not care about her students since you said she never said anything to her on the way out. The director absolutely has to know about these behaviors.

To be fussing at her for saying it was at the beginning of the class istead of 10 minutes into it is insane. Isn't 10 minutes still the beginning. Not that it matters.

Does your school have any other classes she could transfer to if the teacher doesn't change? If your daughter truly enjoys dancing then you can't let one bad teacher ruin that for her. If it comes down to it and no one listens I would demand your money back and switch dance schools. It's a shame to treat her that way. I'm so sorry.

It's really too late in the season to change at this point. They've already started working on recital pieces, so we're stuck with this class. I'm sure I could get my tuition money back, but the costumes have been ordered - and essentially, we're not quitting or at least not until the season is over. My DD has never really had any issues with her before - it's just me. I'm kept my comments about the teacher quiet so as not to prejudice my DD's feelings towards her - until tonight. And DD likes her other teacher - I think she just really got her feelings hurt tonight - HECK! So did I!!

Thanks guys - just wanted to know if I was overreacting. I will definitely speak with the director tomorrow. No, I'm not the only one who has issues with the teacher - I've heard others talking - so I'm sure I won't be the first person who has come to her with complaints.

 

[CarolA]

I would be calling the Director of the school TOMORROW demanding either a new teacher or a refund. I would also DEMAND to sit in on all future classes. (And point out the DIrector that they are LIABLE for stupid behavior. Had your child been severly injured in this class and NOTHING had been done, none of those great statements they make you sign would have protected them )

 

[famofsix]

I would be calling the Director of the school TOMORROW demanding either a new teacher or a refund. I would also DEMAND to sit in on all future classes. (And point out the DIrector that they are LIABLE for stupid behavior. Had your child been severly injured in this class and NOTHING had been done, none of those great statements they make you sign would have protected them )

I would also make the teacher fill out an accident/injury report

 

[AZMickeyfans]

It's really too late in the season to change at this point. They've already started working on recital pieces, so we're stuck with this class. I'm sure I could get my tuition money back, but the costumes have been ordered - and essentially, we're not quitting or at least not until the season is over. My DD has never really had any issues with her before - it's just me. I'm kept my comments about the teacher quiet so as not to prejudice my DD's feelings towards her - until tonight. And DD likes her other teacher - I think she just really got her feelings hurt tonight - HECK! So did I!!

Thanks guys - just wanted to know if I was overreacting. I will definitely speak with the director tomorrow. No, I'm not the only one who has issues with the teacher - I've heard others talking - so I'm sure I won't be the first person who has come to her with complaints.

If you decide to stay with this teacher I would stay and watch each and every class. I know you said there were blinds but I would make sure they are open so you can see. We have large glass windows so we can see everything that happens. Let her know you are watching and see if her behavior changes after you talk to the director of course. This teacher is ridiculous. Make sure you dont get that teacher next year either. I would still see if I could switch if she isn't nicer and more responsible!

I'm glad to hear your daughter is feeling better. What a bad experience for her.

 

[kbkids]

For some reason this teacher and your child do not connect...and it is obvious to you today.

There's the big key right there that bothers me the most!! From the beginning, I feel like she's had an issue with my daughter (although DD hasn't said anything). The other two issues were this - DD was out frequently during the fall with the flu, strep throat, you name it. Every time I thought she was better, she'd get sick again. One afternoon she was at dance, and I needed to pick her up early. She has two dance classes before this particular class, so in all, she's there for 2 hours on Thursday. I got there to pick her up right as this class was starting and told the office mgr that I needed to get her. The office is located where you can't see inside the classroom. She called to the teacher to send her out, and she paused and in a very ugly manner said, "Uh, is she even here????" The office mgr looked up at me and then answered quickly, "Yes, she is, and her mom is standing here waiting on her." - I'm thinking her clue to her to watch her comments - or at the least the tone of them. Is she was so concerned about why she had been out so much, hey, ask me!!!

The second was on our first observation day. We get to observe class twice each dance season. The girls were taking turns doing leaps. With each student, she responded with a comment, "Hey! Great job!", made a funny joke if they messed up, just something, some kind of comment. When DD took her turn, nothing - just watched her and then turned to the next person and told them to go. First time, no big deal - second time, okay??? - third time, my friend turns to me and says "What's up with her and your daughter?" I asked my DD that night if she got in trouble alot in class and she told me no. ????

Like I said, I just don't like her - don't know what her problem is - but she's just rude!!! My friend said she witnessed her get in a verbal altercation with another parent one afternoon in the lobby while several other parents AND THEIR CHILDREN were standing right there. Totally unprofessional!

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

i don't think you are out of line at all. Your DD was hurt!!

 

[TheDisneyGirl02]

That teacher was not being professional by not notifying you about your daughter's injury. I have been dancing at the same studio for 24 years and I have never once seen my dance teacher not call a parent if somebody was hurt. As a matter of fact, when I tore my ACL at dance class, my dance teacher cried!

Was the teacher the owner of the studio? If she's not, talk to the owner. If she is, my best advice would be to finish out this year, since you paid the money already, and then switch to a different studio.

Good luck and tell your daughter to keep dancing!

 

[kbkids]

That teacher was not being professional by not notifying you about your daughter's injury. I have been dancing at the same studio for 24 years and I have never once seen my dance teacher not call a parent if somebody was hurt. As a matter of fact, when I tore my ACL at dance class, my dance teacher cried!

Was the teacher the owner of the studio? If she's not, talk to the owner. If she is, my best advice would be to finish out this year, since you paid the money already, and then switch to a different studio.

Good luck and tell your daughter to keep dancing!

Oh no, she's not the owner. It's actually her first year teaching at this studio. I have loved all of her other teachers - this one, well, she's just definitely not the type of teacher we're used to. If my DD chooses to keep dancing, we will just definitely not be signing up for any classes this girl is teaching.

 

[NDAMomX2]

Ouch, I feel your pain.

My oldest DD danced for 16 years, 10 of which were on a competitive team.

In general my daughter's teachers were wonderful women who loved their jobs and the kids. However, I learned over the years that even the best teachers had their off days. Sometimes they don't always remember that a sore muscle might not bother a grown up dancer too much, it can be extremely painful for a little girl. But ignoring an injury, espescially one that leaves a girl in tears, is completely unacceptable.

I told my daughter about this thread, and she was very concerned by the teachers remark when you came to pick her up early. To her that signified that she has "written off" your daughter as a student. Talk to the directer of the studio, and talk to the teacher. If the director wants to be successful then she needs to employ teachers that understand that 9 year olds get sick and will miss class. Talk to the teacher, give her a chance to explain her actions. Ignoring your daughter, and scolding her in front of you is not okay!

Is this a competition teacher? At my daughter's studios the competition girls had the same 2 or 3 teachers every year. She loved the community this fostered, but the flip side is that a personality conflict can't be solved by avoiding a certain teacher. If this is your daughter's situation, then seriously consider switching studios. A dance studio, when done right, is a family. But sometimes it takes a few tries to find the right "fit" for you. Good luck!

 

[kbkids]

Ouch, I feel your pain.

My oldest DD danced for 16 years, 10 of which were on a competitive team.

In general my daughter's teachers were wonderful women who loved their jobs and the kids. However, I learned over the years that even the best teachers had their off days. Sometimes they don't always remember that a sore muscle might not bother a grown up dancer too much, it can be extremely painful for a little girl. But ignoring an injury, espescially one that leaves a girl in tears, is completely unacceptable.

I told my daughter about this thread, and she was very concerned by the teachers remark when you came to pick her up early. To her that signified that she has "written off" your daughter as a student. Talk to the directer of the studio, and talk to the teacher. If the director wants to be successful then she needs to employ teachers that understand that 9 year olds get sick and will miss class. Talk to the teacher, give her a chance to explain her actions. Ignoring your daughter, and scolding her in front of you is not okay!

Is this a competition teacher? At my daughter's studios the competition girls had the same 2 or 3 teachers every year. She loved the community this fostered, but the flip side is that a personality conflict can't be solved by avoiding a certain teacher. If this is your daughter's situation, then seriously consider switching studios. A dance studio, when done right, is a family. But sometimes it takes a few tries to find the right "fit" for you. Good luck!

No, she's not a competition teacher. This is DD's 6th year dancing. She did try out for dance team this summer and missed it by one spot. The team coach did encourage her to try out again next summer - that's up in the air right now. Anway, there's four other teachers that work up there, in addition to the team instructor. This teacher can be avoided if we need to - it would just mean possibly taking a class at an inconvenient time. I really do like the studio - this has been the only problem we've had. I'm not ready to leave, but it is time to sit down and have a chat with the owner.

 

[AZMickeyfans]

Have you been going to the same school for all 6 years? If so I would think your opinion would highly matter to the owner. Not saying a new student shouldn't matter less but I would think she would do everything she can to keep you there after all that time.

I'm sure she will want to know what is going on.

Glad there are more teachers you have been happy with.