Unexpected savings?

[Dani4girls]

Our first family trip to WDW was in 2005. We had a wonderful time...we rented a home for 2 1/2 weeks, had 10 days at WDW...perfect! My husband and I have been dying to go back before the kids are out of the house, so we are planning a trip for next December. It will be pretty expensive seeing as we are a one-income household and we have 4 kids (ages 12-17). And my husband really wants to stay on-site this time. Well, imagine my surprise when I mention our trip this morning, and my 2 youngest announce that they DON'T WANT TO GO!!!! They would rather go to VERMONT!!! Seriously? I can't believe it. My husband just said, "Well, at least it will be cheaper if we leave 2 at home!" But I want it to be a FAMILY trip!! Anyone ever had kids who didn't want to go? Would you spend all that money on kids that don't even want to be there?

 

[Marionnette]

Our first family trip to WDW was in 2005. We had a wonderful time...we rented a home for 2 1/2 weeks, had 10 days at WDW...perfect! My husband and I have been dying to go back before the kids are out of the house, so we are planning a trip for next December. It will be pretty expensive seeing as we are a one-income household and we have 4 kids (ages 12-17). And my husband really wants to stay on-site this time. Well, imagine my surprise when I mention our trip this morning, and my 2 youngest announce that they DON'T WANT TO GO!!!! They would rather go to VERMONT!!! Seriously? I can't believe it. My husband just said, "Well, at least it will be cheaper if we leave 2 at home!" But I want it to be a FAMILY trip!! Anyone ever had kids who didn't want to go? Would you spend all that money on kids that don't even want to be there?

No, I wouldn't. Teenagers who do not want to be someplace have an uncanny knack for making everyone miserable. If you want to do a family trip, then it should be something that the whole family wants to do. If you want to do a Disney trip, then take the members of the family that want to go and leave the non-Disney crew with a trusted sitter.

 

[crisi]

My fourteen year old spent most of our last trip sleeping and watching tv in the room. And yes, he was perfectly capable of making everyone miserable if we dragged him out.

Your kids are not at good Disney ages, while some teens like Disney, for many it isn't the vacation they'd choose. If you want a family vacation, pick one that interests the whole family....save Disney for a couples vacation with your husband,.

 

[Darcy03231]

If you really want to take a family trip, I would get some input as to another place that everyone is interested in going to.

My kids were about the same ages as yours when we started branching out and doing something different other than WDW.

Some of the other family trips we've done have been cruises, all inclusive resorts, a dude ranch, a Florida trip that included Universal, Islands of Adventure, Busch Gardens, SeaWorld, Wet n' Wild, Kennedy Space Center and Ripley's Believe it or Not museum, Toronto, Washington DC and Virginia Beach.

If you really just want to go to WDW, I would leave the ones home that don't want to go. Teenagers who are forced to go somewhere they don't want to be can make life miserable for everyone else.

 

[ceecee]

How about a Disney Cruise or a Land/Sea Cruise? VERMONT???? Are you close enough to do that for a few days at a different time?

 

[Pigeon]

I probably wouldn't do WDW in your situation.

We've been a couple of times when our kids were younger. I was thinking about going again next year, but we got to talking and mine (15 and 12) said their favorite vacation wasn't WDW at all. They want us to rent a house on a lake again, which was less than half the cost of WDW. They like the laid back family times (teenagers wanting family time???), enjoying nature and swimming in a lake.

Go figure. But if the kids aren't particularly interested, why spend the money. I love WDW, but it isn't terribly relaxing and it costs a fortune.

 

[hsmamato2]

or.... if your teens aren't interested, rent a nice big DVC room (rent points) and only buy tickets for those who want to go into parks. Let the others hang by the pool,watch tv, do whatever. Have nice dinners together,shop,enjoy the company- the resorts are nice just to hang out and do nothing too- that way those of you who like it can go to parks, and those who don't care can do their own thing. maybe some side trips to Universal together,out to eat,etc?

 

[Gina-Gina-Bo-Bina]

If it were me, and the whole family wasn't into it, I'd find a destination that everyone can agree on. Vacations are costly, and family time is precious......so its very important to us that we all go somewhere where we can have fun together.

Is it Disney that the older two object to, or Florida in general? I ask because there is so much more to Orlando than just Walt Disney World . I agree.....its amazing and wonderful......but so are many other places in that area that might also appeal to your teen daughters. I have a 16 year old son, and you may want to check out my TR's below (see links in my signature) for all the OTHER places you could visit besides Disney. Discovery Cove, SeaWorld, Aquatica, Universal Studios, and Islands of Adventure are some biggies. The outlet shopping is fantastic. There's Gatorland, Cocoa Beach, airboat tours, and the Kennedy Space Center. Go-karting, mini golf, and International Drive attractions are all good non-park activities that appeal to teens. Dinner shows can be a ton of fun (our teen LOVED the Outta Control Dinner Show in August, as did we). What about an Orlando Magic game? Or a concert at the Amway Center?

Maybe a resort-type property (with some onsite activities....some have lazy rivers, great pool areas, sometimes mini golf, volleyball courts, etc.) would appeal more than a pool home? Many two bedroom units in timeshare properties would easily accomodate your larger family and provide some fun things to do without ever leaving the property.

All that said, we have had equally as much fun on non-Florida getaways as well. Wisconsin Dells was a blast. Niagara Falls is amazing. Anywhere we can ALL go and enjoy together as a family is bound to set the stage for some priceless family memories.

If everyone is into Vermont, then I say give it a whirl. Give the kids some input and have the whole family involved in the planning, whatever destination you choose. If you have to shelf Disney until the kiddos are grown and its a "Dani & Hubby only" trip, then you still have something to look forward to. Their teen years go by way too fast.

 

[jgreco]

Nope! If you think they'll magically turn into perfect kids that will have the time of their lives they won't. I'm convinced the fun, magical vacations you see people have on TV are a myth unless you are doing EXACTLY what the kids want at all times. The vacations that centered around what the kids wanted to do were always their favorites, of course DH and I needed our own vacation alone by the end of it.

Made the mistake last summer of dragging my older two (at the time DD15 & DS17) on a 7 day cruise. We had never been on one longer than 3 days and thought the kids would have a blast. Well, my daughter was miserable and basically ruined the trip for everyone. It was a lot of money wasted.

Did a 3 day stint in Pigeon Forge,TN where each kid could bring a friend, they had a blast. I was exhausted cooking and cleaning for 8 in our cabin and all the outdoorsy activities.

 

[MinnieForMe]

I also suggest finding a vacation everyone is excited about especially since you state that it will be an expensive vacation and family oriented. We went to Disney two year's ago and my boys were not thrilled. They did end up having fun (we don't allow misbehavior or sulking to get their way) but we did agree that vacations would not automatically be Disney anymore. Last year, we still did Florida but we did Discovery Cove and Universal/IOA. Everyone in our family felt Discovery Cove was even better than Disney including our 6 year old daughter. This year, we are heading to Grand Cayman to snorkel. Everyone is thrilled. I'm still hoping to bring my daughter (only 7) back to Disney but I think it might be a mother/daughter trip.

 

[Colleen27]

I know I'm in the minority on the DIS but I don't let my kids dictate these things. They have input in the planning stages but they are also expected to understand that family vacations are about the whole family and involve compromises... And often that means going some place that isn't your personal best #1 dream vacation destination. We do what we can to make every destination enjoyable for everyone, so for my non-Disney loving teen that means a hotel with a fun pool, extra time at the waterparks and DisneyQuest, and giving him a lot of input into dining planning because the kid loves to eat. But he knows that making the whole family miserable because we didn't give into his preference for beaches with bikini views or tromping through the woods up north isn't an option, and none of the kids have dug in and refused to enjoy any vacation no matter how much they disliked the idea initially (and that goes for my DD getting dragged off to play in the woods as well as my DS getting hauled to WDW).

 

[Marionnette]

I know I'm in the minority on the DIS but I don't let my kids dictate these things. They have input in the planning stages but they are also expected to understand that family vacations are about the whole family and involve compromises... And often that means going some place that isn't your personal best #1 dream vacation destination. We do what we can to make every destination enjoyable for everyone, so for my non-Disney loving teen that means a hotel with a fun pool, extra time at the waterparks and DisneyQuest, and giving him a lot of input into dining planning because the kid loves to eat. But he knows that making the whole family miserable because we didn't give into his preference for beaches with bikini views or tromping through the woods up north isn't an option, and none of the kids have dug in and refused to enjoy any vacation no matter how much they disliked the idea initially (and that goes for my DD getting dragged off to play in the woods as well as my DS getting hauled to WDW).

Good for you! You win the perfect parent award. Those of us who have no mind-control skills bow down to your superior abilities!

There is no way that I would blow a load of money on a vacation that half of the family doesn't want to go on. Nor would I drag an unwilling participant along just to prove a point that I'm the boss and whatever I say goes.

 

[Colleen27]

Good for you! You win the perfect parent award. Those of us who have no mind-control skills bow down to your superior abilities!

There is no way that I would blow a load of money on a vacation that half of the family doesn't want to go on. Nor would I drag an unwilling participant along just to prove a point that I'm the boss and whatever I say goes.

I'm far from perfect (hey, I'm one of the DISers who admits to having <gasp> a student who does poorly!) and there's no mind control involved. I just don't think basic respect is too much to ask of the kids, even as teens. But I also don't think that our parenting successes are of our own making; a big part of the credit goes to the fact that all three of my kids are quite laid-back by nature.

If I took the stance that I was the boss and whatever I say goes I wouldn't blame my kid for being a PITA! We're a family of 5 - we blow a load of money on EVERY vacation we take and there just aren't that many places that we are all excited to see. If we only traveled by unanimous agreement on a destination or activity we'd never go anywhere. So we have a system of informally taking turns choosing the destinations. Sometimes that means DS14 has to suck it up and tolerate Disney (something he enjoys a lot more now that he's old enough to go his own way a bit), sometimes it means DD11 has to deal with a cabin in the woods when she'd rather be in a nice resort, and sometimes it means I get to be bored senseless hanging out with the preschooler in the kiddie area while the big kids explore a museum or tackle some adventure like zip lining.

 

[scrapquitler]

Our first family trip to WDW was in 2005. We had a wonderful time...we rented a home for 2 1/2 weeks, had 10 days at WDW...perfect! My husband and I have been dying to go back before the kids are out of the house, so we are planning a trip for next December. It will be pretty expensive seeing as we are a one-income household and we have 4 kids (ages 12-17). And my husband really wants to stay on-site this time. Well, imagine my surprise when I mention our trip this morning, and my 2 youngest announce that they DON'T WANT TO GO!!!! They would rather go to VERMONT!!! Seriously? I can't believe it. My husband just said, "Well, at least it will be cheaper if we leave 2 at home!" But I want it to be a FAMILY trip!! Anyone ever had kids who didn't want to go? Would you spend all that money on kids that don't even want to be there?

Yes. Last year, we decided to go, and our kids (then age 15 and 8) told us that they didn't want to go! They wanted to get Six Flags season passes instead! (we live about an hour from Six Flags) So DH and I went to Disney World by ourselves, and left them home with my Mom and we bought Six Flags passes for this summer.

 

[Dani4girls]

Thank you so much for all your input!

or.... if your teens aren't interested, rent a nice big DVC room (rent points) and only buy tickets for those who want to go into parks.

I really liked this idea...I will have to see what my husband thinks.

And Colleen27, I agree with you...and my kids realize that it's not "all about them". My hesitation is more because of the amount of money that a vacation at WDW will take. KWIM?

 

[stayhomemom77]

I'm far from perfect (hey, I'm one of the DISers who admits to having <gasp> a student who does poorly!) and there's no mind control involved. I just don't think basic respect is too much to ask of the kids, even as teens. But I also don't think that our parenting successes are of our own making; a big part of the credit goes to the fact that all three of my kids are quite laid-back by nature.

If I took the stance that I was the boss and whatever I say goes I wouldn't blame my kid for being a PITA! We're a family of 5 - we blow a load of money on EVERY vacation we take and there just aren't that many places that we are all excited to see. If we only traveled by unanimous agreement on a destination or activity we'd never go anywhere. So we have a system of informally taking turns choosing the destinations. Sometimes that means DS14 has to suck it up and tolerate Disney (something he enjoys a lot more now that he's old enough to go his own way a bit), sometimes it means DD11 has to deal with a cabin in the woods when she'd rather be in a nice resort, and sometimes it means I get to be bored senseless hanging out with the preschooler in the kiddie area while the big kids explore a museum or tackle some adventure like zip lining.

I'm with you. My kids are 9 and 7 so Disney is still a much loved vacation for them but this past summer we took a three week driving tour of the west coast and they didn't love Yellowstone and were mad we didn't hit every children's museum that each city on our tour had to offer.

I told them to suck it up. Dad really wanted to go to Yellowstone and see the aircraft carrier museum in San Diego but wasn't terribly excited about Disneyland. I loathed Legoland and the San Diego Safari Park but had a great time at the Grand Canyon and the Disney area. We didn't complain and we expected the same from the kids. Sometimes they still were unhappy but sometimes they found they were having fun in spite of themselves.

Family fun sometimes involved compromises.

To the OP...if it were me, I would talk to the two youngest about the reasons they don't want to go and offer whatever solutions seem reasonable to make the trip more appealing to them. Some good suggestions have already been posted. I would also push the "onsite" angle. If they've never done it before...it might make it a whole different trip this time around. That's how our family felt our first time staying onsite.

If after this they still REALLY don't want to go, I would have a family conclave to decide what to do. I personally wouldn't want to go on a trip with only part of my family but I'd have a hard time giving up Disney for Vermont (as lovely as that state is).

Good luck! I hope you come to a resolution that works for the entire family.

 

[lisajl]

Wow! I can't get rid of my kids! My DH and I would love to go to WDW by ourselves and we will someday. Our DD-26, Ds-18 and DS-15 have told us that no matter where they are, if we are headed to Disney, THEY are going with us! I just hope they pay their own way!
LOL!

I hear Vermont is very pretty. That sounds like a great family vacation.

 

[Marionnette]

I'm far from perfect (hey, I'm one of the DISers who admits to having <gasp> a student who does poorly!) and there's no mind control involved. I just don't think basic respect is too much to ask of the kids, even as teens. But I also don't think that our parenting successes are of our own making; a big part of the credit goes to the fact that all three of my kids are quite laid-back by nature.

If I took the stance that I was the boss and whatever I say goes I wouldn't blame my kid for being a PITA! We're a family of 5 - we blow a load of money on EVERY vacation we take and there just aren't that many places that we are all excited to see. If we only traveled by unanimous agreement on a destination or activity we'd never go anywhere. So we have a system of informally taking turns choosing the destinations. Sometimes that means DS14 has to suck it up and tolerate Disney (something he enjoys a lot more now that he's old enough to go his own way a bit), sometimes it means DD11 has to deal with a cabin in the woods when she'd rather be in a nice resort, and sometimes it means I get to be bored senseless hanging out with the preschooler in the kiddie area while the big kids explore a museum or tackle some adventure like zip lining.

Sorry for flying off the hook. I got my feathers ruffled when it sounded like you were implying that people who take the kids' preferences into consideration are somehow allowing them to dictate where the family goes.

I see that your oldest is 14. It's a great age, but speaking from experience with boys, that's the age at which teenage boys start to assert their independence. An easy-going kid might not be difficult to reason with. A stubborn, opinionated kid only becomes that much harder to deal with when forced to do something they don't want to do. You learn to pick and choose your battles. Church every Sunday? Non-negotiable. You're going, bud! Disney World vacation with Mickey Mouse everywhere? Not a deal-breaker for me. Stay home with Grandma while the rest of us get our Disney fix. We'll bring you a t-shirt.

However, if my heart was set on doing a FAMILY vacation, I would try to find a place that everyone wanted to go. If half of the family said NO to Disney and the other half said that they would be fine with Vermont, we would be spending time in Vermont. Then I would take the money that I saved by not taking the whole crew to Disney and plan a short, grown-ups-only trip for me and my husband.

 

[Pigeon]

I know I'm in the minority on the DIS but I don't let my kids dictate these things. They have input in the planning stages but they are also expected to understand that family vacations are about the whole family and involve compromises... And often that means going some place that isn't your personal best #1 dream vacation destination. We do what we can to make every destination enjoyable for everyone, so for my non-Disney loving teen that means a hotel with a fun pool, extra time at the waterparks and DisneyQuest, and giving him a lot of input into dining planning because the kid loves to eat. But he knows that making the whole family miserable because we didn't give into his preference for beaches with bikini views or tromping through the woods up north isn't an option, and none of the kids have dug in and refused to enjoy any vacation no matter how much they disliked the idea initially (and that goes for my DD getting dragged off to play in the woods as well as my DS getting hauled to WDW).

My kids don't get to dictate anything either, and ruining everybody else's vacation because they are pouting isn't acceptable, either.

But if they aren't thrilled with WDW, I don't see the point in wasting all that money and vacation time. I wouldn't go for an alternative that I would hate (so forget about camping in any way, shape or form), but if there are some less expensive options that are agreeable to everyone, that's what we're doing.

I like WDW and maybe someday dh and I will go by ourselves again once the kids are grown. But for now, I'm good with putting the couple of thousand we'll save into their college funds.

 

[Crazy4Disney06]

My oldest is only 11, but if he does not like the vacation we have chosen to take then he can get a job and pay for the one he does want to take. I know this might sound harsh but really we are the ones working and paying for it, he don't have to like it but I do expect him to behave if he doesn't. If Disney is the vacation you want to take your family on then by all means do it, and don't let the children decide something that really the parents should have all the say in.