Unconventional Parents?

[Tinkermommy]

I think tattoos are pretty conventional around here. Unless the subject matter was violent or overly sexual wouldn't bother me.

We had a nanny for 2 years that had piercings, tattoos, dressed steampunk, and we never knew what color her hair would be when she showed up for work. She was the sweetest most caring person and a wonderful nanny to my children.

I did get some comments about her from other moms but then they realized how great she was and some of them asked her to babysit.

As I get older, I care less and less what others think.

 

[SLK1]

I recently noticed that tattoos are actually more the norm than not. It's not so crazy to have tattoos anymore...it's "the thing". I am so fickle with my tastes I would worry that once I got a tattoo, I'd end up hating it! I wonder how people with "sleeves" handle that?!

 

[Squirlz]

I recently noticed that tattoos are actually more the norm than not. It's not so crazy to have tattoos anymore...it's "the thing". I am so fickle with my tastes I would worry that once I got a tattoo, I'd end up hating it! I wonder how people with "sleeves" handle that?!

We handle it by getting something really nice and well done the first time!

 

[NFLDERS]

Years ago, there was a nonconventional child rearing going on; Where the idea was to let the children do as they wish, as long as they do not get hurt.

Long story short, I offered to watch the children of one family, while their regular sitter, a friend of mine got over a virus.

It was an eye opening experience. One day, just before the children's Mother was returning home from work; The nine yr old started roller skating in the house!

This was a large center hall, wood floor home. Thinking the child was pushing the limit, I told her to stop. She gave me her answer, No I'm allowed.

A short time after her Mother comes in, seeing this she says to DD, "You know the rules, NO skating without a helmet". Not even remotely what I thought would be said!


I never babysat there after that. I don't know how anyone could.

 

[marlynnp]

seriously, you're trying too hard

I thought the OP lived in/near NYC. I doubt anyone thinks that 'look' is unconventional. I tend to believe any perceived 'judging' has more to do with personality issues.

 

[Colleen27]

Any parents out there feel they are different than the social norm of what a parent should act, look or be like? I certainly am different than most parents, and I notice often that I am being judged..luckily I don't care!! I have several tattoos, which for me is art, and I get looks like I could never be an educated, well-rounded, great mom/person. Anyone else deal with this?

Oh yeah. That's probably the thing I struggle with most about where we live - we moved to this fabulous Mayberry-esque small town that is without question an excellent place to raise a family, and we send our girls to a wonderful private school with the most dedicated staff I've ever met and tiny class sizes that allow them to get all the attention they could ever need to work to their full potential. But the downside of that is dealing with the small town Christian expectations of what a parent is supposed to look/act like. It doesn't help that I'm younger than most of the other moms either - a few of the other K moms are around my age, but they are there with their oldest kids and I'm with my youngest.

 

[aaarcher86]

My husband just shared this site with me. Seems appropriate for this thread: 24 People who are really nailing this parenting thing

I would like to say that as someone who was abruptly woken up while on a retreat to that freaking Lion King song..... IT'S TERRIFYING!

the Getalong Shirt is hilarious.

 

[LisaR]

What did I miss?. Anybody know why the first version of this thread got deleted?

I am so glad you mentioned that. I thought I was losing my mind. I swear I read this thread before going to bed last night and it isn't even remotely the same this morning!

 

[Planogirl]

I love the Dad who wears costumes and waves at the bus. He would be embarrassing but really cool too.

 

[Caseheidi]

All I care about when I see a parent is that the children are loved and well cared for. I have to admit that I do not like to see children ignored, especially when they are misbehaving or doing something dangerous. So I say who cares what a parent looks like, how they are educating their child or where they live. Just love your kid and give them the attention they need.

 

[ZephyrHawk]

Well, it kind of depends on what you consider conventional. These days the trend seems to be attachment parenting/helicopter parenting; is that "conventional" because it's what the majority of folks do now (at least in my area) or "unconventional" because it's not what our parents did? Since I mainly do things the way my parents did (with a few minor updates) does that make me conventional or unconventional?

Regardless, I am unguiltable. No one has ever yet tried to guilt me. A friend did try to pull a "Feber method is evil" on my DH, and failed, but she wouldn't have done so with me (as she knows I'm not nearly as nice as he is).

I don't know what tattoos have to do with parenting. I do admit to judging people who get them in obvious locations, but only with respect to the level of professional accomplishment they will be able to achieve.

 

[holycow]

You sound very insecure to me.

 

[njmom47]

Well, DH is very unconventional-looking. He gets called "Rob Zombie" or "Jesus." DH is one of the nicest, soft-spoken guys you'll ever meet. And when he coaches baseball, he knows his stuff, and the kids love him. He's a great husband and dad, and grandfather as well.

I'm def a plus size mom with tattoos. I too get in the pool. I don't care!

Our kids tell us all the time that we are the greatest parents ever and they are so glad we are theirs.

 

[brookmey]

I define conventional parenting as the styles you find in parenting books, articles, following the recommended strategies for situations, etc. But, what I've learned from raising a very free spirited and against the grain daughter, is that you have to find what works for you and your kids. It may seem unconventional to others, but if it works for you and your kids, then who cares what others think.

DH and I have had to do a complete rehaul of our parenting style for DD. No one in our family understands it and they question what we're doing. We went from reading almost every type of parenting book I could find (which didn't work on DD at all) to ignoring most parenting advice and doing what will get the most out of DD while still preserving her spirit. We are definitely parenting DD in an unusual, unconventional way. But I don't really care what other parents think of me anymore because what we're doing is working for DD and us. She's happier, we're happier and our household no longer feels like a war zone.

Other parents' opinions of my parenting style no longer matter to me because they don't have experience raising a child like DD. They're not in my shoes so they can judge me all they want and it doesn't bother me. It took me a long time to get to this point, but It's a good feeling.

 

[Justmeandnooneelse]

I tell my 30-year old daughter that she is unconventional because she has no tattoos. Only her ears are pierced, each only once, and she has never dyed her hair. She is really a rebel! All of her peers have tattoos and multiple piercings.

 

[kimblebee]

I like to think I'm unconventional. I mentioned one thing before and got called a troll and a bad mom ~ in not so many words.

I let my daughter watch pretty much anything she wants to. She is 12 turning 13 in October. I let her watch movies with swears and horror movies and documentaries with controvertial subject matter. I talk to her about not using the words she hears and she doesn't. At least around me she doesn't. She knows not to swear around little kids and relatives and anyone else who may be offended. That pretty much only leaves her friends and I'm ok with that. That may be because I swear. I don't swear around her or other kids or my family and so on and so on. When I'm with friends? Sure, I swear.

There are a few movies I won't let her watch yet. Boogie Nights, Knocked Up and The Hangover are the only ones I can think of off the top of my head right now. Adult movies too, of course. Other than that, it's all good.

She usually asks if she's not sure and 9.5 times out of 10 I will say yes.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I like to think I'm unconventional. I mentioned one thing before and got called a troll and a bad mom ~ in not so many words.

I let my daughter watch pretty much anything she wants to. She is 12 turning 13 in October. I let her watch movies with swears and horror movies and documentaries with controvertial subject matter. I talk to her about not using the words she hears and she doesn't. At least around me she doesn't. She knows not to swear around little kids and relatives and anyone else who may be offended. That pretty much only leaves her friends and I'm ok with that. That may be because I swear. I don't swear around her or other kids or my family and so on and so on. When I'm with friends? Sure, I swear.

There are a few movies I won't let her watch yet. Boogie Nights, Knocked Up and The Hangover are the only ones I can think of off the top of my head right now. Adult movies too, of course. Other than that, it's all good.

She usually asks if she's not sure and 9.5 times out of 10 I will say yes.

I have to laugh because that is the movie they showed at my son's 7th grade class sleepover at school last year. It's only rated "ab 12" here and all the kids were either 12 or 13.
I still haven't seen it--but had heard enough on the DIS to raise my eyebrows a little at the choice I decided it was a lot more important for my son, the new kid (at the time) in a class that had been together since first grade, to be there and start fitting in than it was for me to make a fuss about the movie

I am not even sure what is or is not "conventional" anymore--but I am pretty sure tattoos is not anything particularly attention grabbing for most people in most places in the US, Canada or Europe any more

I am pretty sure that my friend who went camping many, many kilometers from people, without a cell phone, and birthed her third baby in a stream of cold mountain run off and then stayed there for the first three months of the baby's life (with Dad and two older brothers) would still be considered unconventional, but beyond that, I really do not know.

 

[DawnM]

Define conventional and unconventional and I will tell you what kind of parent I am.

 

[NHdisneylover]

Define conventional and unconventional and I will tell you what kind of parent I am.

Well, the OP pretty much said she has a lot of tattoos and that makes her unconventional.

I'm still wondering where she lives that this is the case

 

[msjprincess]

Well, the OP pretty much said she has a lot of tattoos and that makes her unconventional.

I'm still wondering where she lives that this is the case

I was wondering the same thing so I searched to see if she mentioned where she lives. She lives in NYC.