unbelievable invite - asked to fund a Disney trip for a relative

[ekball]

1) You are turning 37, not 9.

I wouldn't even do this for my 9 year old! (Unless a grandparent asked 'what can we get him/her?', but even then, it wouldn't be to fund the trip it would be for their spending money. And it still might feel a little weird.) BIZARRE.

 

[cheshireqt]

LOVE the 'make a wish foundation' gift idea! Someone very deserving would benefit and your cousin could really not say anything at all other than thank you!

 

[ForAandA]

Some of these posts have made me laugh, and others have made me shake my head. I remember getting an invitation once to a high school gaduation party. In the invitation, was a money card! I know that it is customary to give cash to a graduate, and I have no problem doing so. Just don't supply the money envelope obviously implying what you want!

No, I didn't go to the party. Just for the record .

 

[JenGC]

OK I was wondering about this for my DD turning 9. We are going on a cruise for her birthday. I was going to throw her a party the weekend before we left so she could celebrate with her friends. I was going to put on the invitation that she would prefer a Disney gift card since she is going on a cruise. I wasn't sure the gage of the tacky-o-meter on that one. There have been times where parents have called asking what to get her. While she is MORE than fine with them JUST showing up, if they want to bring a gift, I would prefer a $5 gift card to a toy that she will play with for about a month and have it sit on the shelf.

I guess this would gage 10 on the meter. Thanks!

 

[Handbag Lady]

OK I was wondering about this for my DD turning 9. We are going on a cruise for her birthday. I was going to throw her a party the weekend before we left so she could celebrate with her friends. I was going to put on the invitation that she would prefer a Disney gift card since she is going on a cruise. I wasn't sure the gage of the tacky-o-meter on that one. There have been times where parents have called asking what to get her. While she is MORE than fine with them JUST showing up, if they want to bring a gift, I would prefer a $5 gift card to a toy that she will play with for about a month and have it sit on the shelf.

I guess this would gage 10 on the meter. Thanks!

It is perfectly fine to throw a party and not mention gifts.

But, some guests/parents will call and ask what she'd like. THEN, and only then, can you say what your child might like.

My sister threw herself a 40th birthday party a few years ago. She had it an the Eagles lodge and arranged for gaming tables to be there and gave out chips to everyone. It was a great party and didn't cost her too much. What she really, really wanted was money for an upcoming Disney World trip, so when we were asked from the family an appropriate gift, we let them know. But, she never once ASKED for anything. Some people gave gifts, some people did nothing and some people sent money to her vacation fund. It was perfect!

 

[JenGC]

It is perfectly fine to throw a party and not mention gifts.

But, some guests/parents will call and ask what she'd like. THEN, and only then, can you say what your child might like.

My sister threw herself a 40th birthday party a few years ago. She had it an the Eagles lodge and arranged for gaming tables to be there and gave out chips to everyone. It was a great party and didn't cost her too much. What she really, really wanted was money for an upcoming Disney World trip, so when we were asked from the family an appropriate gift, we let them know. But, she never once ASKED for anything. Some people gave gifts, some people did nothing and some people sent money to her vacation fund. It was perfect!

OK then I will do that. The LAST thing I want to do is come across as greedy. HOPEFULLY they will get the hint that she wants disney dollars since she is going on a cruise! lol

 

[n2mm]

wow. I thought only I got stuff like this. Last month we were invited to a wedding and didn't even know who the couple was. Finally we figured out who it was. It was the son of the other woman that my brother in law recently married after his wife divorced him for cheating. what the! I looked at my DH and laughed. I didn't send the rsvp back and didn't go. I hate when I get invited to stuff because I have a good job and they want a gift. But recently my great niece graduated from HS with honors and I had no problem sending her a gift because I knew how hard she worked and is a great kid. The best gifts I send are the ones that are not solicited.

 

[Sunbeamblue2002]

Well I think that I have the winning story. My sister threw a party for her daughters first communion. Fine however she invited the whole faimly to a very nice resterant where the menu choices were limited. Fine. Well she forgot to mention to me that she was also celebrating my Moms birthday as well (It was just a few days after my moms b'day). The clicher was I had just had a serious medical drama that led to the deaths of my twins and had just paid for a funeral. Well I show up because my mother told me to go (Mom didn't relize that the suprise party was happening.) so that I would get out of the house. Well image how embaressed I was that I was the only person at the party with out a gift for their own mother. Now mom wonders why were not close.

My advice, Go to the party. Get your aunt a gift because thats who your really going to see anyway and leave it at that. Do you really care if your cousin gets mad. Enjoy time with your family.

 

[hugApug]

My tacky story is not a invite story but a gift story. I was married in 1992. My hubby's cousin was to be married a couple of months before me. She had a big shower where she received a lot of gifts and then shortly before the wedding she called it off. Not only did she not return the gifts, when I opened my wedding gift from her I found a card tucked in to the top of the box. This card was not the card from her to me and my hubby...it was a card to HER from Aunt on the other side of the family!!! So she was re-gifting the gifts she should have rightfully returned LOL

I thought my wedding gift experience was bad, but yours is worse! My cousin was married in September and annulled by November..We never got a thank you for the gift, nor did she return the nice mixing bowls I bought her. I guess that's why some people use the one year grace period for wedding gifts.

For the OP, I'd say donate the money to a foundation(Make a Wish would be a good one) in your cousin's name. Maybe that will put things into perspective for her...or not, but at least the $$$ is going to a heartfelt place.

 

[EKW]

When I get crazy invitations, I give crazy gifts. I say find an M&Ms tube and fill it with pennies and quarters...stacked for use in penny squishers. In the card, tell her that squished pennies are a wonderful Disney souvenir, and you wanted her to be ready when she gets to Disney. LOL!

I'd make my tone completely sincere...so she can't accuse you of being snotty about this. To me, the entertainment involved in watching her unwrap and open the candy tube would be more than worth the time and irritation involved!

 

[plummer925]

When I get crazy invitations, I give crazy gifts. I say find an M&Ms tube and fill it with pennies and quarters...stacked for use in penny squishers. In the card, tell her that squished pennies are a wonderful Disney souvenir, and you wanted her to be ready when she gets to Disney. LOL!

I'd make my tone completely sincere...so she can't accuse you of being snotty about this. To me, the entertainment involved in watching her unwrap and open the candy tube would be more than worth the time and irritation involved!

I actually think this is a really neat idea!!!

 

[Swimalie]

.

I don't know if I'd have the guts to do it, but I'd be tempted to give her a gift all right. She'd be handed a card that said, "A donation has been made in your name to help the Make a Wish foundation send a child to Disney." I'd like to see her try to complain about that.

I love the Make a Wish idea. I would do this!