Typical 16 month old behavior?

[DisneyLovingMama]

Okay, I need a sanity check. I don't really think something is wrong with DS, but he is SOOOO different from DD.

He's not really talking (says mama, up, out and one of my dog's names). He understands me and will follow simple direction. But, oh, he screams. He screams so much and so loud. He sounds like an injured seagull half the time. I don't know how much more I can take of this phase.

Plus, he is into so many things and just refuses to listen most of the time. As I'm cleaning up one mess, he'll be making another. In the 20 minutes after we got home today, he managed to spill his dinner tray, overturn a cup of tea, empty the garbage can, pour the dog water all over the floor, and overturn/drag three of his larger toys (think fisher-price dinosaur and activity stations) out of his playroom.

He also is hitting and spitting and kicking when he doesn't get his way. I get down to his level, tell him to stop and he just slaps me. I've gotten black and blues on my arms from where he kicks me when I change his diaper. He constantly hits his sister and the dogs. Me telling him no doesn't work -- he laughs or screams. I redirect his energies and he just cries or goes right back to what he was doing. He remembers things hours later and goes back to them -- he's so singularly focused. His daycare has told me that for being the smallest kid in the class, he's the biggest bully.

Why couldn't I be a single Mom with my DD - she was so easy. I love my little guy, but I'm 50% more grey because of him.

 

[Iott Family]

No two kids are alike. I know my first born talked early and well but my third born took his time but dont be mistaken because he understands what we say and follows simple commands. As for the getting into stuff......sometimes boredom is the reason. Sometimes its an attention getting thing. I know my tot is very curious and investigates EVERYTHING to the point of destruction at times and if he is tired or bored look out.....he can be down right naughty!

I would consult my pediatrician if my worries got too big.

If it makes you feel better my tot has learned to escape the house so we are hving alarms and special locks installed pronto. All parents have these challenges of some sort, im sure he is just being assertive and curious and not meaning to be so destructive! but like I said.....if you are feeling so very concerned give the ped. a call!

 

[720L]

Sounds like he's all boy! When he hits you, do you remove him from the situation? (put him in his room for a time out etc) Thats what I had to do for a LONG time to get that to stop.

 

[janet715]

Okay, I need a sanity check. I don't really think something is wrong with DS, but he is SOOOO different from DD.

He's not really talking (says mama, up, out and one of my dog's names). He understands me and will follow simple direction. But, oh, he screams. He screams so much and so loud. He sounds like an injured seagull half the time. I don't know how much more I can take of this phase.

Plus, he is into so many things and just refuses to listen most of the time. As I'm cleaning up one mess, he'll be making another. In the 20 minutes after we got home today, he managed to spill his dinner tray, overturn a cup of tea, empty the garbage can, pour the dog water all over the floor, and overturn/drag three of his larger toys (think fisher-price dinosaur and activity stations) out of his playroom.

He also is hitting and spitting and kicking when he doesn't get his way. I get down to his level, tell him to stop and he just slaps me. I've gotten black and blues on my arms from where he kicks me when I change his diaper. He constantly hits his sister and the dogs. Me telling him no doesn't work -- he laughs or screams. I redirect his energies and he just cries or goes right back to what he was doing. He remembers things hours later and goes back to them -- he's so singularly focused. His daycare has told me that for being the smallest kid in the class, he's the biggest bully.

Why couldn't I be a single Mom with my DD - she was so easy. I love my little guy, but I'm 50% more grey because of him.

Are you sure you're not talking aboout my 17 month old daughter?????

 

[DisneyPhD]

Have you considered sign language with him? It sounds like he has a lot to say and not a lot of ways to say it. A lot of his acting out sides like frustration in being unable to express himself. I really like this series of DVD's, you can find them at the libary sometimes or on PBS.

http://www.signingtime.com/

Best of luck!

Also he is a little young for it still but 123 magic is a good system to use for disapline. (they say ages 2 and up.)

http://www.parentmagic.com/

 

[tw1nsmom]

I can't really tell you about how a typical toddler boy should behave. My son has special needs.

I would check with your doctor, but trust your gut instinct too. Many doctors (even pediatricians) have little experience with developmental issues. You can refer your own child for an evaluation at county expense (it's ussually called early intervention) if you feel it's necessary. If you wait until he's three, you need to go trough the school district.

Another thing to consider is to introduce some basic sign language. He may be acting out because he can't comunicate his wants/needs. I've seen this work really well for some children.

Other things to try...try to figure out what sets him off and try to avoid those situations until he settles down a little...ignore bad behavior (what I mean by this, is that when he's doing something negative, if it isn't dangerous or destructive, ignore him until he does the smallest positive thing and then generously praise him...this works with those children acting out to seek attention)...If he is being destructive or dangerous, firmly say NO! We don't ____ and physically remove him from the situation, repeat until he stops (you probably already do this, but try to do this with as little anger/drama as possible so that you don't feed into the attention seeking)...If he has good receptive verbal skills, review what is happening next and expected behaviors in a positive, upbeat way (even if he doesn't appear to get it, he will eventually, and what he does understand may help him feel more in control)...keep things super consistent (same schedule, same consequences - this is what works with DS, any change can really throw him)

All of these suggestions are things that work for some children with challenging behaviors/special needs. I am NOT saying that your son has special needs. I just thought I'd throw out some ideas that have worked for me and my friends.

 

[southernbella]

As a Mom of a 18 month old DD, I feel your pain!LOL What you described is exactly what my DD is doing. I'm just praying it won't last too long. Her ped told me that toddlers have the same hormone issues that teenagers go through, but they can't vocalize their frustration, hence the tantrums, biting, etc. Kinda explains things (doesn't make it any easier though!). Sbella