Traveling with someone who has VERY different opinions and taste

[DisneyGuy]

My friend recently asked me if I wanted to go with her and she hasn't been in YEARS. I said, OK, but was hesitant. While we get along, we are very different in more ways than one and we've never traveled together. I told her that I'd be able to do 4 nights and that if she gave me her budget, i'd see what I can do. I figured Disney would be perfect because if for some reason we needed some space, I'd be perfectly fine going off of my own as I'm well aware of the parks and transportation and can entertain myself easily at WDW as opposed to a new city that I've never been too.

So, here's the problem. I have deluxe taste and my friend has value. I have no problem with the value rooms (although i've never stated value) but I just don't want to deal with the location. I prefer boats/walking/monorail to at least 1 park and I also prefer indoor corridors. I found a deluxe that fit her budget but was told that it was out of the question by about $200.00. I stated that all I need is a nice resort and that all other expenses are up to her (food, mostly). I thought this was a compromise as I'd probably be eating counter service food for 4 days instead of table service at least once a day (sometimes twice) like I'm used to. After all, we should both get a say - right?

I'm sitting here thinking about just paying the additional $200.00 and of course, expecting nothing in return just hoping it would be appreciated - she has no idea how nice it is to walk back to your resort after park close. I just can't help but feel like I would be taken advantage of and that I'm just too nice! I already said "Oh well, we'll try to plan something another time".

I just don't know what to do - maybe just cancel and wait for someone else to come along.

Any thoughts? suggestions? Would you downgrade your resort to make someone else happy? Keeping in mind that everything would be completely one sided at this point (food included).

 

[WDW in Pearls]

I was in this same situation a few years ago when I stayed at Pop with some friends because no one wanted to pay for deluxe. I'm not going to act like I'm a Vanderbilt, but Disney is the one thing where I spare no expense.

It's all about compromise. Maybe she will agree to eat at some higher end restaurants? Or maybe you could even do a split trip? Most people who are new to Disney see the prices and don't know why anyone WOULDN'T choose a value, so it's up to us Deluxe veterans to show them why it's great! If nothing else, go walk around the lobbies shopping or whatever. Maybe it will convince her for next time.

 

[ChristineNic]

Would the Swalphin be a reasonable compromise? Deluxe location and amenities for the price of a moderate.

 

[mommyrosa2]

My friend recently asked me if I wanted to go with her and she hasn't been in YEARS. I said, OK, but was hesitant. While we get along, we are very different in more ways than one and we've never traveled together. I told her that I'd be able to do 4 nights and that if she gave me her budget, i'd see what I can do. I figured Disney would be perfect because if for some reason we needed some space, I'd be perfectly fine going off of my own as I'm well aware of the parks and transportation and can entertain myself easily at WDW as opposed to a new city that I've never been too.

So, here's the problem. I have deluxe taste and my friend has value. I have no problem with the value rooms (although i've never stated value) but I just don't want to deal with the location. I prefer boats/walking/monorail to at least 1 park and I also prefer indoor corridors. I found a deluxe that fit her budget but was told that it was out of the question by about $200.00. I stated that all I need is a nice resort and that all other expenses are up to her (food, mostly). I thought this was a compromise as I'd probably be eating counter service food for 4 days instead of table service at least once a day (sometimes twice) like I'm used to. After all, we should both get a say - right?

I'm sitting here thinking about just paying the additional $200.00 and of course, expecting nothing in return just hoping it would be appreciated - she has no idea how nice it is to walk back to your resort after park close. I just
can't help but feel like I would be taken advantage of and that I'm just too nice! I already said "Oh well, we'll try to plan something another time".


I just don't know what to do - maybe just cancel and wait for someone else to come along.

Any thoughts? suggestions? Would you downgrade your resort to make someone else happy? Keeping in mind that everything would be completely one sided at this point (food included).

I have a friend like that and while I love her dearly, I would NEVER vacation with her. If your friend is being so inflexible now, can only imagine how she would be during the vacation itself...do you really want to risk having to "settle" constantly just so she remains happy? I wouldn't. You want to be able to enjoy yourself as you should since it is your vacation as well. Compromising has to be both ways and if she's unwilling to budge, leave her behind...JMHO.

 

[DisneyGuy]

I was in this same situation a few years ago when I stayed at Pop with some friends because no one wanted to pay for deluxe. I'm not going to act like I'm a Vanderbilt, but Disney is the one thing where I spare no expense.

It's all about compromise. Maybe she will agree to eat at some higher end restaurants? Or maybe you could even do a split trip? Most people who are new to Disney see the prices and don't know why anyone WOULDN'T choose a value, so it's up to us Deluxe veterans to show them why it's great! If nothing else, go walk around the lobbies shopping or whatever. Maybe it will convince her for next time.

Oh, trust me, I'm not made of money. When it comes to Disney, I don't have sticker shock. I fully am aware of the "Disney" premium and will pay it because I'm a huge fan and it's my favorite place to go. I just think that staying at a place with all bus transportation would kill the trip for me. I've been too much to deal with it. My friend probably wouldn't care as long as she was saving money but I just feel the difference in expense is so minimal that the benefits of deluxe outweigh the savings.

 

[DisneyGuy]

Would the Swalphin be a reasonable compromise? Deluxe location and amenities for the price of a moderate.

I love the Swan and Dolphin and have stayed at both multiple times. The prices are better, but when she knows there's "less" somewhere else - it would probably be an issue.

 

[DisneyGuy]

I have a friend like that and while I love her dearly, I would NEVER vacation with her. If your friend is being so inflexible now, can only imagine how she would be during the vacation itself...do you really want to risk having to "settle" constantly just so she remains happy? I wouldn't. You want to be able to enjoy yourself as you should since it is your vacation as well. Compromising has to be both ways and if she's unwilling to budge, leave her behind...JMHO.

You know, it does seem like maybe it's for the best. As much as I love Disney, and it's going to kill me to cancel, it could turn out bad - very bad.

 

[mommyrosa2]

You know, it does seem like maybe it's for the best. As much as I love Disney, and it's going to kill me to cancel, it could turn out bad - very bad.

Is there anyone else you could ask? I would try to find someone else just so you wouldn't have to cancel. Good Luck!

 

[WDW in Pearls]

Mommyrosa2 has it 100% correct! It's kind of like roommates...you may love each other but it doesn't mean you can live with one another! Traveling comes with a lot of stress, both positive and negative and it brings out the best and worst in people. My sister and I usually get along great and we argued pretty badly one night at Kona, one of our favorite restaurants! It was actually pretty embarrassing, I was overtired and my luggage got lost and I was crying like a moron. We made up during MSEP though

 

[DisneyGuy]

Is there anyone else you could ask? I would try to find someone else just so you wouldn't have to cancel. Good Luck!

I'm doing my best to think of who I know that could go!

If I could find someone who I know would love it, I'd take them in a minute.

I guess there's no harm in keeping the reservation for a while while I'm searching.

 

[WDW in Pearls]

I'm doing my best to think of who I know that could go!

If I could find someone who I know would love it, I'd take them in a minute.

I guess there's no harm in keeping the reservation for a while while I'm searching.

Why can't I have more friends with this problem??? LOL

 

[DisneyGuy]

Mommyrosa2 has it 100% correct! It's kind of like roommates...you may love each other but it doesn't mean you can live with one another! Traveling comes with a lot of stress, both positive and negative and it brings out the best and worst in people. My sister and I usually get along great and we argued pretty badly one night at Kona, one of our favorite restaurants! It was actually pretty embarrassing, I was overtired and my luggage got lost and I was crying like a moron. We made up during MSEP though

Glad to hear you made up! There can be a lot of stress. I wanted to make this trip so memorable for this person that's why I was keeping it 100% Disney and as perfect as I could. I was looking forward to showing her around the parks so to speak. In fact, I probably would have done a lot of treating but I think that ship sailed.

 

[It'sWDW4me]

Does she have a value resort budget compared to your deluxe resort taste? I know for me, deluxe is just a pipe dream. But I love Disney so I would MUCH prefer to be able to go more often while staying value or moderate rather than have to save for a lot longer/not go as often in order to stay deluxe.

Maybe that $200 is a lot for her?

IMHO, if deluxe accomodations are a "deal breaker" for you, then you can either pick up the difference with a smile and no further thoughts of compensation from her OR you can find a different travel partner with a budget/taste more similar to yours.

 

[DisneyGuy]

Why can't I have more friends with this problem??? LOL

yeah, you'd think it would be easy but it's not.

 

[carrie1626]

Of all places i would NOT want to hear complaining and then have to turn around and compromise is WALT DISNEY WORLD
It's my HAPPY PLACE and I'll be darned if I'll have it any other way.

If you feel the same, there's your answer.

 

[mommyrosa2]

Mommyrosa2 has it 100% correct! It's kind of like roommates...you may love each other but it doesn't mean you can live with one another! Traveling comes with a lot of stress, both positive and negative and it brings out the best and worst in people. My sister and I usually get along great and we argued pretty badly one night at Kona, one of our favorite restaurants! It was actually pretty embarrassing, I was overtired and my luggage got lost and I was crying like a moron. We made up during MSEP though

Soooo true! Disney is the one destination that I will NOT travel with extended family...too many options + too many opinions can equal DISASTER! Heck I love my DH & both my teen girls to death but it would be a lie if I said we never had our own "meltdowns" at one time or another in Disney

 

[DisneyGuy]

Does she have a value resort budget compared to your deluxe resort taste? I know for me, deluxe is just a pipe dream. But I love Disney so I would MUCH prefer to be able to go more often while staying value or moderate rather than have to save for a lot longer/not go as often in order to stay deluxe.

Maybe that $200 is a lot for her?

No, in fact, it was within the given budget. But just out of the question.

 

[BringingUpDisney]

You know, it does seem like maybe it's for the best. As much as I love Disney, and it's going to kill me to cancel, it could turn out bad - very bad.

I second this, I actually did this and ended up compromising on everything! Then weird behavior really came out. She didn't want to go on any rides that messed up her hair and kept wearing inappropriate shoes and complaining that her feet hurt - it was a nightmare trip...

 

[DisneyGuy]

I second this, I actually did this and ended up compromising on everything! Then weird behavior really came out. She didn't want to go on any rides that messed up her hair and kept wearing inappropriate shoes and complaining that her feet hurt - it was a nightmare trip...

yeah, this has happened to me before but in Disneyland.

 

[WDW in Pearls]

Soooo true! Disney is the one destination that I will NOT travel with extended family...too many options + too many opinions can equal DISASTER! Heck I love my DH & both my teen girls to death but it would be a lie if I said we never had our own "meltdowns" at one time or another in Disney

My BIL and I have our differences, but lemme tell ya, after a long hot day in AK, we had some words and it was NOT pretty! I will only go with DBF and close family from now on, thank you very much!