Tough situation....

[DizBelle]

This is not me or anyone I know. It is a story I heard and I thought I'd get the DIS perspective.

A single mother with a special needs child is struggling to do her job (and therefore keep her job). 2-3 times every week there is a schedule variation where she is late, leaves early, or doesn't go in to work at all. Apparently the cause of the absences is she is having to deal with her child. Losing her job would be pretty devastating as apparently the child's father is not around nor contributing time or money to their child.

It's a pretty sad situation but it isn't really fair to the other workers to fill in the gaps she leaves so often.

The people at the company feel for her and don't want to terminate her but she isn't really sticking to the terms of her job either.

What do you think of this situation?

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I would, first, see if there are any resources that could help her. Like Employee Assistance, or FMLA, perhaps, or others. I guess it would depend on what the nature of the problem was. Then I'd take it from there.

 

[Mickeyluver37]

I think it would depend on what kind of job setting this is. I work in an office and if there were schedule variations but she could still put in the time by either staying late or was able to fill in the gaps from home, and still get her work done, this would be no big deal. Someone that works in a hospital, for instance, where physically being there at the exact times is critical would have a different perspective. If this were an employee of mine it would also matter what "dealing with" the child meant as well.

 

[SC Minnie]

I was also going to suggest she look into FMLA.

BUT having been on the coworker's side recently it's hard to do your job and someone else's.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

I would also look into FMLA also. It can cover lateness, leaving early and call outs.

 

[Mizzoufan]

I would see if she eliigible for FMLA and then she if her co-workers would take up a collection for her and kids esp with it being Christmas.[/QUOTE]

 

[morgan98]

This is not me or anyone I know. It is a story I heard and I thought I'd get the DIS perspective.

A single mother with a special needs child is struggling to do her job (and therefore keep her job). 2-3 times every week there is a schedule variation where she is late, leaves early, or doesn't go in to work at all. Apparently the cause of the absences is she is having to deal with her child. Losing her job would be pretty devastating as apparently the child's father is not around nor contributing time or money to their child.

It's a pretty sad situation but it isn't really fair to the other workers to fill in the gaps she leaves so often.

The people at the company feel for her and don't want to terminate her but she isn't really sticking to the terms of her job either.

What do you think of this situation?

I agree with others in that it depends as to the nature of her job as it relates to scheduling variances. For example, if the receptionist has to be there 8:30 to 5:30, it is not practical to work from home or make up the time at night.

Another consideration is this person's overall job performance. Are they a super star when at work? Then it may make sense to give her some time to work through this.

Also, it this a temporary thing? Has it been going on for two weeks, or has this been an issue for a year and there is always "something."?

I think all of these issues come into play. I have terminated in a situation like this when the issues were truly never ending and it became very, very disruptive to the company as a whole. And no, I am not heartless...

 

[DizBelle]

I think it would depend on what kind of job setting this is. I work in an office and if there were schedule variations but she could still put in the time by either staying late or was able to fill in the gaps from home, and still get her work done, this would be no big deal. Someone that works in a hospital, for instance, where physically being there at the exact times is critical would have a different perspective. If this were an employee of mine it would also matter what "dealing with" the child meant as well.

*This is at best tertiary information but even if it is not accurate, it should provide for an interesting and enlightening discussion.

I don't know all the details but this is an office environment in a support role. You kind of have to be there to provide support.

I'm not entire sure what the child's issues are but I'm hearing "extreme ADHD" to the extent he's gotten kicked out of school and such and apparently "fired" by his doctors.

 

[DizBelle]

I agree with others in that it depends as to the nature of her job as it relates to scheduling variances. For example, if the receptionist has to be there 8:30 to 5:30, it is not practical to work from home or make up the time at night.

Another consideration is this person's overall job performance. Are they a super star when at work? Then it may make sense to give her some time to work through this.

Also, it this a temporary thing? Has it been going on for two weeks, or has this been an issue for a year and there is always "something."?

I think all of these issues come into play. I have terminated in a situation like this when the issues were truly never ending and it became very, very disruptive to the company as a whole. And no, I am not heartless...

From what I can gather, it's been going on for more than a year and there are schedule variations 2-3 times every week.

 

[pryncess527]

Is she full time?
How significant are the schedule variations? (leaving/arriving 1 hour late vs 4 hours late?)

My company encourages managers to provide as much flexibility to workers as possible. Providing office support does require the person to be present, but can often permit flexibility for when they are present as long as there is enough overlap between the supporter and the supportees for communication to happen -- but it really depends on what kind of support we are talking about. Our Admin Assistants get a lot more flexibility than our Receptionist, because we need someone answering the phone 45 hours a week with virtually no interruption.

 

[smiths02]

*This is at best tertiary information but even if it is not accurate, it should provide for an interesting and enlightening discussion.

I don't know all the details but this is an office environment in a support role. You kind of have to be there to provide support.

I'm not entire sure what the child's issues are but I'm hearing "extreme ADHD" to the extent he's gotten kicked out of school and such and apparently "fired" by his doctors.

What does "kicked out of school" mean? If the disability is causing the problem, there is a limit to how much suspension the kid can get. A public school, at least in the US, HAS to educate the child.
The school counselor or social worker might also be able to help her find resources like help a few hours a week with babysitting/caregiving, an advocate so he is getting the educational programming he needs versus being kicked out of school, referrals to doctors/psychologists who will work with him

 

[DizBelle]

Is she full time?
How significant are the schedule variations? (leaving/arriving 1 hour late vs 4 hours late?)

My company encourages managers to provide as much flexibility to workers as possible. Providing office support does require the person to be present, but can often permit flexibility for when they are present as long as there is enough overlap between the supporter and the supportees for communication to happen -- but it really depends on what kind of support we are talking about. Our Admin Assistants get a lot more flexibility than our Receptionist, because we need someone answering the phone 45 hours a week with virtually no interruption.

Yes, full time. When it is coming in late or leaving early, I think it is 2 hours or so. Then there are the entire days being absent.

 

[SC Minnie]

From what I can gather, it's been going on for more than a year and there are schedule variations 2-3 times every week.

If the mother can't get protection with FMLA the company may have to terminate. I've had this situation on my team and it brings morale down on the whole team. It's not good. People feel conflicted that they feel sorry for her but they also are ticked off that they have to do her job and theirs- especially if they are salaried- she's still getting paid and they aren't getting more for doing double work. And with the 'its always something' and '2-3 days a week' the others in the office feel like they can never take vacation because they don't know if she will be there leaving the team in more of a bind. It's a struggle.

 

[DizBelle]

What does "kicked out of school" mean? If the disability is causing the problem, there is a limit to how much suspension the kid can get. A public school, at least in the US, HAS to educate the child.
The school counselor or social worker might also be able to help her find resources like help a few hours a week with babysitting/caregiving, an advocate so he is getting the educational programming he needs versus being kicked out of school, referrals to doctors/psychologists who will work with him

I'm not sure. I thought it was weird.

 

[gwynne]

*This is at best tertiary information but even if it is not accurate, it should provide for an interesting and enlightening discussion.

I don't know all the details but this is an office environment in a support role. You kind of have to be there to provide support.

I'm not entire sure what the child's issues are but I'm hearing "extreme ADHD" to the extent he's gotten kicked out of school and such and apparently "fired" by his doctors.

I always think situations involving fellow employee behavior are best left with HR. It's frequently the case that chatting co-workers don't have the full picture, both with what is happening and what the plan forward will be.
I suppose if a fellow employee is very bothered, they should make an appointment with HR and discuss their concerns about how the problems are involving them.

 

[DizBelle]

If the mother can't get protection with FMLA the company may have to terminate. I've had this situation on my team and it brings morale down on the whole team. It's not good. People feel conflicted that they feel sorry for her but they also are ticked off that they have to do her job and theirs- especially if they are salaried- she's still getting paid and they aren't getting more for doing double work. And with the 'its always something' and '2-3 days a week' the others in the office feel like they can never take vacation because they don't know if she will be there leaving the team in more of a bind. It's a struggle.

Exactly, it is a struggle. Even though I'm not involved in this situation, this is why I brought this up here to get others' thoughts.

 

[Christine]

If her child has a documented disability, then she needs to get her own documentation and provide it to her employer. She can use the FMLA route or the Reasonable Accommodation route. Point is, she needs to formally address this so that she is protected somewhat from a true disability. This doesn't mean that the employer is stuck with someone who can't do the job, but they can openly review the issues, see how they can best let her keep her job, and figure out a plan. Having no plan is what causes other coworkers to become disgruntled etc. Also, it could be that there is no way she can be accommodated, either through FMLA or the RA process and it causes undue hardship on the employer. If that is the case, she might have an option for some type of disability for herself as a caretaker.

 

[DizBelle]

I always think situations involving fellow employee behavior are best left with HR. It's frequently the case that chatting co-workers don't have the full picture, both with what is happening and what the plan forward will be.

Not my co-worker and not my company. I heard the story and was wanting the thoughts of other people. I'm sure this is not entirely uncommon.

 

[gwynne]

Not my co-worker and not my company. I heard the story and was wanting the thoughts of other people. I'm sure this is not entirely uncommon.

I didn't think it was your co-worker.
My thoughts are that HR should handle it.
Complaints about fellow workers are not uncommon. Sometimes they are valid, sometimes not, sometimes there is more to the story.

 

[DizBelle]

If her child has a documented disability, then she needs to get her own documentation and provide it to her employer. She can use the FMLA route or the Reasonable Accommodation route. Point is, she needs to formally address this so that she is protected somewhat from a true disability. This doesn't mean that the employer is stuck with someone who can't do the job, but they can openly review the issues, see how they can best let her keep her job, and figure out a plan. Having no plan is what causes other coworkers to become disgruntled etc. Also, it could be that there is no way she can be accommodated, either through FMLA or the RA process and it causes undue hardship on the employer. If that is the case, she might have an option for some type of disability for herself as a caretaker.

Wait, does a child's disability get the parent an accommodation at work?