Tips: entitlement or earned?

[rockyroad]

Waiting is hard work.
It may not look like it to the patron sitting there, but it really is.
Unless you have been a waiter you probably don't understand.

I don't like the way the restaurant industry is set up, but when I walk into a restaurant I feel obligated to tip the server.
Tips are part of their pay since without tips they make about $2.00 an hour.

Would you work for $2.00 an hour?

Not tipping the server is stealing.

You are sitting at their table consuming their time and keeping them from having a paying customer.

If the service is so bad that you feel justified in withholding a 15% tip, then you should have talked to the manager before the meal was over.

Consider the waiter's tip part of the cost of a meal before you go into a restaurant. If you don't want to tip, then get takeout or counter service or eat at home.

 

[nunzia]

If you don't feel a tip was earned, you can talk to the manager and have it removed from the bill. I do feel that tips still need to be earned, but that they can be unearned (is that a word?) as well. If I got truly sucky service, I wouldn't hesitate to talk to the manager and have a tip removed from the bill.

On the other hand, if you get truly exceptional service you can also increase the amount of the tip.

I agree. However..many places are going to pooling tips, which I think is just lousy..the sucky servers get the same cut as the excellent ones which, IMO, takes away incentive to do a stellar job.
So..in that case you would not really be sending a message to a bad server if you didn't leave a tip.

 

[madxhatter]

just as a side note and an answer to the question about tipping on take out...

in restaurants when you get take out (especially those with curbside to go) it shouldnt be assumed that the person that gives you your food is only doing that. they arent just cashiers in most places....

i worked curbside to go for macaroni grill and i can honestly tell you i did just as much work, if not more than the servers, and in take out we only earned minimum wage (some places even pay their to go people server minimum wage- i know outback does). i answered all of the calls, took the orders & put them in the computer, checked and packed up all of the to go boxes (which if i were waiting tables the expo and food runner would have checked the food and ran it to the table), made all the to go drinks, processed all payments and even ran food out to the cars.... i would have 10 to 20 orders going on at once and had many, many regulars whose voices i recognized over the phone and whose orders i knew by heart ...

i ran around just as much as the servers did... so what i didnt bring you that one refill you needed.. i did everything else a server does for you when dining in...

i know there are many restaurants that done have their to go workers do this much work.. but when you order take out you should observe what is going on around you before you decide that person doesnt deserve to be tipped, because they may be doing a lot more work than you realize... for not as much money as you think...

=)

 

[nunzia]

um, before you think it is the same you need to actually understand what happens in restaurants. For example my DH waited tables this summer and while he was an excellent server he occasionally got stiffed or under tipped. When you don't tip properly you are flat out taking money from that servers pocket. How?

Because servers are REQUIRED to tip out based on their sales. Not their tips. So you don't leave a tip and that server has to take a $1, $2, $3 or more from their pocket and give it to a busser/bartender/dishwasher. Real nice there huh? It was 3% of sales at the restaurant that DH just worked at and that is pretty standard. So if you leave them 15%...they are only seeing 12% and that's if their other tables left them enough in tips.

That is industry standard (DH has been a restaurant manager for more than a decade too). Hence the reason there is an auto gratuity on larger parties. A larger party can take up all of a server's attention and they are unable to work their other tables or they lose their other tables to attend to your party. The tip is to ensure that you don't come in and basically take money from the server.

There's no reason to complain or moan about a standard practice in the US. You either tip voluntarily or you pay a LOT more, no choice, on menu costs.
Most ppl would prefer to have some say in their tip left, no?

I hope that helps with some insight to why you are expected to tip more for your steak than your burger.

I was a manager in Vegas, union houses and not, and the people were well paid. However, the only people the servers sometimes shared tips with were their bussers..to get them to hustle..and at one place (union) the bussers weren't supposed to get tips at all. The tipped staff have different deductions taken from their pay, an assumed amount based on a formula of restaurant income, of how much in tips they are taxed on. It's rather complicated. But,..in Vegas the only people who were in this matrix were the servers. Hostesses and bussers, dishwashers, etc, were not considered tipped employees.

 

[roadtripper]

In the US, servers make 2.35 an hour. When I waited tables, my paycheck was 0.00 every week. Why? Because you declare your tips, and taxes are taken out of your hourly wage. Where I worked, servers had to declare beween 8-10% of their total sales at a minimum, regardless of what you actually made in tips. If you stiff a server, they will be taxed based on the total sales of your bill regardless of whether or not they actually got a tip. I'm not suggesting that there is a never a reason to stiff a server, but before you do so, speak with the management so they can be clear about what happened. Otherwise you just seem cheap, and the server is not required to correct his/her behavior. If you owned a restaurant, wouldn't you want to know why a server was stiffed? I know I would.

 

[L107ANGEL]

In the US, servers make 2.35 an hour. When I waited tables, my paycheck was 0.00 every week. Why? Because you declare your tips, and taxes are taken out of your hourly wage. Where I worked, servers had to declare beween 8-10% of their total sales at a minimum, regardless of what you actually made in tips. If you stiff a server, they will be taxed based on the total sales of your bill regardless of whether or not they actually got a tip. I'm not suggesting that there is a never a reason to stiff a server, but before you do so, speak with the management so they can be clear about what happened. Otherwise you just seem cheap, and the server is not required to correct his/her behavior. If you owned a restaurant, wouldn't you want to know why a server was stiffed? I know I would.

 

[Grumpy'sWife4Ever]

Wow!! I knew this board would be the place to ask! I have actually learned a lot! Like I said, I have never "stiffed" anyone, but I have left less than the 15% required. Now I think that instead of making my dissatisfaction known by monetary means, I will make a point of talking to a manager or filling out a reply card (some places do read these! I've gotten coupons in the mail!) I never think about the others who get a cut of the $$ or the fact that the server pays taxes on the money whether I tip or not.....
However, I have to say that the system does royally suck. It seems like the restaurant owners get a good deal paying a lower wage, the gov't gets a good chunk of tax money no matter what, and the customer has to pay for service that is sometimes barely adequate (or worse) to avoid massive guilt. Bummer.

 

[TheRustyScupper]

Curious, what constitutes poor service?

. . . inattention to the needs of the table
. . . slow service
. . . not refilling water or drinks timely, and often
. . . not clearing the table promptly
. . . getting orders mixed up with other tables
. . . getting orders mixed up within our table
. . . not returning frequently enough to check on us (being busy is no excuse)
. . . not being pleasant
. . . cold food when served
. . . incorrectly prepare food (well-done steak when medium-rare was ordered)
. . . poorly presentation of food on the plate (if poor, server should address with the cook)
. . . dirty plates, silverware, glasses (the server should have checked these already)

Because servers are REQUIRED to tip out based on their sales. Not their tips. So you don't leave a tip and that server has to take a $1, $2, $3 or more from their pocket and give it to a busser/bartender/dishwasher. Real nice there huh? It was 3% of sales at the restaurant that DH just worked at and that is pretty standard. So if you leave them 15%...they are only seeing 12% and that's if their other tables left them enough in tips.

. . . but, if their service is good, they get an adequate tip
. . . if their service is bad, they deserve what they don't get
. . . they also deserve to pay others out of their own pocket


NOTE: My answers may sound harsh, but when I go to a restaurant I expect a great service level. I don't care how many other tables the server has. It is his/her job to figure out how to serve us correctly for the money I pay. If they are short of servers by 20% and can't keep up due to the work load, I have not seen the server come out and say they will reduce my bill by 20%. We are majority holders of two restaurants and the servers can, and do, lose their jobs if they cannot service the guests well.

NOTE2: Some people say, "you can't expect great service always". OK. But, when should you? When the steak costs $12? When the steak cost $15? When the steak costs $25? How do you gage "when" you should accept sub-par performance?

 

[delmar411]

. . . inattention to the needs of the table
. . . slow service
. . . not refilling water or drinks timely, and often
. . . not clearing the table promptly
. . . getting orders mixed up with other tables
. . . getting orders mixed up within our table
. . . not returning frequently enough to check on us (being busy is no excuse)
. . . not being pleasant
. . . cold food when served
. . . incorrectly prepare food (well-done steak when medium-rare was ordered)
. . . poorly presentation of food on the plate (if poor, server should address with the cook)
. . . dirty plates, silverware, glasses (the server should have checked these already)

the bolded items the server has no control over. Those should be addressed with management and the total bill adjusted. You do not punish someone who had no control over those items. That is what makes an unreasonable guest.
incorrectly prepared food ~ cook problem not the server
poor presentation ~ and if there is a food runner/expo?
dirty plates ~ came from the dishroom and the server doesn't touch them
dirty silverware ~ was most likely rolled by a server the day before

. . . but, if their service is good, they get an adequate tip
. . . if their service is bad, they deserve what they don't get
. . . they also deserve to pay others out of their own pocket

actually my DH gave amazing service to each and every table. He's a professional and always 'ON' when working. Some ppl didn't leave enough to cover the bill, some ppl just assumed others were leaving a tip, others just stiff servers no matter what. I know for a fact he never gave anyone bad service. After one week serving he already had multiple ppl coming in and requesting his section. He made 3-4x the amount of tips that every other server made each and every shift. He was a dream server and they were very sad to see him go back to management.

And why do servers deserve to pay bussers and dishwashers anything? Bussers are getting paid min wage and more as are dishwashers. They do not give service to the customer and should not be getting a tip out. I've always felt like that and even more so after I saw how much DH was handing over to them each shift and then hearing about some servers handing over almost all their tips to tip out because they didn't make enough.

NOTE: My answers may sound harsh, but when I go to a restaurant I expect a great service level. I don't care how many other tables the server has. It is his/her job to figure out how to serve us correctly for the money I pay. If they are short of servers by 20% and can't keep up due to the work load, I have not seen the server come out and say they will reduce my bill by 20%. We are majority holders of two restaurants and the servers can, and do, lose their jobs if they cannot service the guests well.

NOTE2: Some people say, "you can't expect great service always". OK. But, when should you? When the steak costs $12? When the steak cost $15? When the steak costs $25? How do you gage "when" you should accept sub-par performance?

For the record I agree that service should be at a min up to par but I do have my bill adjusted for bad service. I'm not paying full price for terrible service. But I also bring it to the management's attention so they can deal with the server. I don't completely stiff them because I know they have to live too.

My DH has fired more servers than I can count for performance issues. That's standard across the board if you have decent management. But not everyone can always be at peak performance. It's just not possible. Leaving no wiggle room for letting the server be a human being and have problems just sets the scene for failure. Maybe you only eat at upscale restaurants but the average casual family dining restaurant will have real ppl with real life issues that can and do effect their service to the guest even if they don't mean it to.

 

[dawnball]

In the US, servers make 2.35 an hour. When I waited tables, my paycheck was 0.00 every week. Why? Because you declare your tips, and taxes are taken out of your hourly wage. Where I worked, servers had to declare beween 8-10% of their total sales at a minimum, regardless of what you actually made in tips. If you stiff a server, they will be taxed based on the total sales of your bill regardless of whether or not they actually got a tip.

If you're regularly receiving less than 8-10% average tips, perhaps there's a better establishment for you to work at, or you need to improve your skills. If you're complaining that you're being taxed on the tips you receive, I have no sympathy. Servers are required to accurately report their tips for tax reasons. There are ways to document that you routinely received fewer tips than were used when calculating your withholding. However, a single server who claims that they got far lower tips than everyone else in the restaurant is more likely to be audited.

A $0.00 paycheck is to be expected, but is offset by the pocketful of cash you take home every night you work.

 

[worm761]

What about places where the wait staff is paid minimum wage? Just like the girl a Target? There are some states where the min wage for servers is like $7/hour.

 

[Goofyzgurl]

I am a great tipper, IF I receive good service. I don't ask for much, refill my drink when my cup is empty, take away the plates when I'm done, extra napkins, timeliness and just being pleasant. It doesn't take much to get a good tip from me. Is it hard work? Yes, but if you've been in the business long enough, you know what will ensure a good tip. Of course, there will always be those ignorant people who will stiff you, but like any other job, this is just one of the cons of waiting tables.

 

[DVCisME]

What about places where the wait staff is paid minimum wage? Just like the girl a Target? There are some states where the min wage for servers is like $7/hour.

Where's that? I waitressed and we were all paid $2.13/hr. I think that a tip should reflect service but a 15% tip means that you sucked. 20% is norm and anything above is great!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

As a former waitress I think tips should be earned. It really annoys me that we get charged a gratuity automatically because we are a family of 6. When I waitressed we could charge a gratuity for anf party of 5 or more. It was our choice. I never did and always got huge tips. You know why? I EARNED them!!!! I worked hard and made sure my tables were served. Sure some people are cheaper than others but that is the nature of the job.

 

[Kycha]

This is what I don't understand about tipping. Please...would someone explain it to me! Why is it that I have to leave 15%+ to the waiter whether he brings me a burger or a steak? He's doing the same exact thing for each meal. Bringing me the dish, getting me a refill, and getting me napkins or condiments if needed. So why do I have to give him more money just because he carried a steak instead of a burger?? That is what irritates me about tipping! BTW, I do always tip unless they're absolutely horrid.

I don't understand either. My favorite restaurant serves breakfast, lunch and dinner. I get the same amount of service no matter what meal we are served. But, because breakfast meals are cheaper than lunch, and lunch is cheaper than dinner, the tips are so too.

This is a typical meal amount for DH and I at our fav restaurant and what we would tip(20%).
breakfast $15 - $3 tip
lunch $20 - $4 tip
dinner $50 - $10 tip

Why does the breakfast server get paid less for the same amount of service?
And if we go to a more expensive restaurant...I am getting the same amount of service, but the server is getting a better tip than if I went to my favorite diner, because the meal is more expensive? Doesn't make sense to me.

As for tipping on takeout service...it depends on the restaurant. We order takeout from my favorite diner at least once a week. It is the hostess' job to put the takeout orders together. That includes getting soup, drinks, desserts, plasticware, salad dressings, some sides, and salads. Basically they box up everything but the entree. I always tip them well. Now, at my local pizza shop I don't tip. They are putting a pizza in a box rather than a tray. Doesn't deserve a tip imo.

I really can't stand the way the tipping system is set up and am trying to find something more suitable for me. Rather than tipping a percentage, tip a set dollar amount per person in the party. I don't know...I haven't figured it out yet.

Oh, going back to the OP...if the restaurant is going to put an automatic gratuity on every guest check. Why don't they just do away with the gratuity, pay their servers a higher wage and raise the restaurant prices?

 

[DVCisME]

I think that an imposed tip usually reflects in either worse service or a not so great tip for a great server. I do know that is some places it is a requirement that it has to be put on the checks and the staff can get in trouble for it not being on a check. On the other hand a server can also be terminated for putting it on a check where it should not be, it is considered stealing.

 

[Handbag Lady]

Earned.


If the server thinks they deserve a tip automatically because of how their wages are structured, then maybe they should be in another job that isn't structured that way.


Hey, I'm an easy and heavy tipper, but I reserve the right to not tip if I get bad service.

 

[DVCisME]

"And if we go to a more expensive restaurant...I am getting the same amount of service, but the server is getting a better tip than if I went to my favorite diner, because the meal is more expensive? Doesn't make sense to me. "

I think that there is a big differnce in the service you get at a diner and that of an expensive restaurant and if there is not I would re-evaluate where I was going. There should be a noticable difference in the standards of the staff.

 

[Kycha]

"And if we go to a more expensive restaurant...I am getting the same amount of service, but the server is getting a better tip than if I went to my favorite diner, because the meal is more expensive? Doesn't make sense to me. "

I think that there is a big differnce in the service you get at a diner and that of an expensive restaurant and if there is not I would re-evaluate where I was going. There should be a noticable difference in the standards of the staff.

I'm not comparing my local diner to a 5 star restaurant. I would expect the same service that I get at my local diner that I would get at Outback or Applebee's though. But an average meal for DH and I at Outback or Applebee's is between 30-50% more than my diner. But the service isn't 30-50% better. That is my point.

 

[Karenj2]

I had a recent experience this Friday, at Dave and Busters. We were a party of 8 (mom, dad, sister, her hubby & 2 kids and DH and I). They were busy, but not horribly so. The waitress was nice enough, but after ordering our drinks, it took a while to get them - and I had asked for water and an alcoholic drink, and I only got the alcohol. We ordered appetizers, and the plates came out about 20 minutes before the actual apps. I had to ask again for water, and finally got it as the dinner arrived. For everyone else. DH's bacon cheeseburger was missing the cheese, and they didn't even bring mine out. (Runners brought our food out, not our waitress.) She had completely forgotten to order it. She came out later and said it'd be "right out". It came out as everyone else was finishing up their food. She asked if anyone wanted dessert while I was still eating. I asked for another water (which never did arrive).

Now, I had no idea what her tip was, 'cause my BIL paid for dinner (we were together celebrating my nephews bday), but I asked to pay for my and my hubby's drinks separately. When the bills came out, the copy I was to sign showed what the total should be based on the automatic 18% gratuity (~$26), then the total (~$21), and a place for a tip line and a total. It seemed rather high, so I looked at the other receipt that showed the actual items we bought, and the real total was ~$18, with the 18% making it $21! The receipt was totally deceptive, and I actually was annoyed that the waitress didn't care to explain it to me.

On the flip side, I ate out on Saturday too (with different folks, also paid for ), and since we were another large party, this waitress explained in the begining that the system would show an 18% gratuity, but that we could increase or decrease depending on her service. (She was GREAT.)

All that longwinded stuff being said, having been a waitress (at locations that didn't tip - a retirement home and in college) I usually tip 20% unless the person really stunk.