Time to pick on the rednecks why? cause I sorta am one.

Raulandpinboy

<font color=blue>Table-dancing auctioneer<br><font
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Messages
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Top 10 Reasons to Know You're a Redneck

1. Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife.

2. You wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers, and vacations.

3. You have ever had to wash off in the backyard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house.

4. You've never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket.

5. You can remember the fertilizer rate, seed population, herbicide rate and yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife's birthday.

6. You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper.

7. You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors crops.

8. You have borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway.

9. You have buried a dog and cried like a baby.

10. Your dog passes wind and you claim it!
 
Ed,

You've gone too far this time. <i>No one </i> believes that you -- a half-Cuban/half-Australian, techno-weenie :rolleyes: -- would no a darn thing about herbicides, seeds, or fertilizers. :tongue:

And I've never seen you wear a hat at all. :smooth:
 
I am not so sure. I have read Ed's posts and I think he can spead the fertilizer around with the best of them.

Lee
 
Hey Ed, if doing a few of these things make you a redneck then I guess I have to buy a truck because I am guilty of some too.
I have been doing some construction on my house and have about 15 buckets saved from the taping compound, and I cried for days when I had to put my dog to sleep. I still get teary eyed when I think of him and it has been over 10 years.
I don't have a wife but my dog is in my car more than my male companions.
I guess according to this list there is a redneck in most of us. Peggie
 

I step up to the plate...clear my throat & say...'hi...my name is Buggin' & Im a redneck'...& darn proud of it too!!! :p

Buggin'
Amber
 
Doing that off topic I must protest thing again.

Stike a nerve there Michael? something you want to share with the gang?

Mr. I loves me a good tractor pull show. :tongue:

Yea buddy I saw you eyeing my Redman cap the last time you were here. :teeth:

And Amber I'm so proud :teeth: wanna go to a Monster Truck rally with me and Bob, you'll get wet and it will be cold but when those monster trucks rev up you'll say I'm home...

Peggie you go girl I know you got a roll of duct tape in there somewhere.

And Lee and Robyn I got your fertilizer :teeth:

Nothin but love for you all nothin but love.
 
Ed is a caca collector, have you not seen his wired, alarmed, air conditioned, sorround sounded, lifted, souped up shed??????

Oh yeah, you might be a redneck if your family tree does not fork!

You might be a redneck if, your mother in-law can tell off a state trooper without taking the cigarette out of her mouth and putting down the beer can!

You might be a redneck if, your house is on wheels!

You might be a redneck if, you know right before an accident when most people say...Oh s@#$!!!!???, well if you say "Honey watch this", you might be a redneck!!!!
 
Blue Necks are Northerners -- the opposite of Rednecks.
Because of Redneck jokes, here are some takes on how Southern folks look at Northerners (or how Northerners sometimes think of themselves).
In reality, Rednecks are everywhere, not just the South.

YOU JUST MIGHT BE A BLUE NECK IF...
Instead of referring to two or more people as "Y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both of them are women. NY- make it "youse guys"
...You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."
...You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY.
...You would never stop to buy something somebody was cooking on the side of the road. (e.g., boiled peanuts) .
...You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly
...For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes-au-gratin to grits.
...You don't know what a moon pie is.
...You've never had an RC Cola.
...You've never, ever eaten okra -- fried, boiled, or pickled
...You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.
...You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen are on road trips
...You have no idea what a polecat is.
...You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on your dog
...You don't have bangs.
...You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show.
...You drink either "Pop" or "Soda"- instead of "Cokes."
...You've never eaten and don't know how to make a tomato sandwich.
...You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-'n-knife show.
...You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach
...You don't even have one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.
...The last time you smiled was when you blocked someone from getting on an onramp to the highway.
...You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.
...You have more than one professional sports team in your home state.
...You call binoculars opera glasses.
...You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping.
...You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice)
...You don't know any women with male names (i.e., Tommie, Bobbie, Johnnie, Jimmie)
...You don't have Maw-maw's & Pawpaw's.
...You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.
...None of your fur coats are homemade
 







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