Thoughts on this b-day party??

[samshane]

Has your child ever been invited to a birthday party where the invitation states that the parents giving the party will pay for part of the activity, but want you to pay for the remainder?

We just got an invitation that states just this for a painting party. The invitation states they are only paying for part of the pieces the kids pick - and nothing is as low as what they are paying. So even if we pick the cheapest item, we'll still need to pay.

Is it just me who finds this odd? We had a party like this and the kids had a selection to choose from when we got there and I picked up the tab for all of it since it was my child's b-day.

Personally I would find a less expensive alternative or invite fewer kids than to ask my guests to pay.

 

[Polyluvr]

I totally agree w you; weird.
And my child wouldn't be attending.

 

[C.Ann]

Technically, they shouldn't be inviting kids to a birthday party that they can't afford to pay for..

 

[krcit]

I would decline.

 

[kathie859]

I hate invitations that require $$$ on my part to participate and this is no different. I am worn down by people who want to have a "party" but instead of planning something in their price range, rely on invitees to pitch in. A potluck event is one thing and lots of fun since the expectations are set that everyone will be contributing something, but a birthday party that requires payment I don't think so.

OP...if my daughter was the closest of friends with the birthday girl, I MAY just suck it up and let her go; however, if the birthday girl is just an acquaintance, I'd pass.

 

[EMom]

This is an occasion when RSVPing, "Bite me," is appropriate. If you can't afford Type X party for your child, then don't book it. Scale back and have what you can afford. End of. If your "guests" are expected to pay, they are not guests. They are CUSTOMERS.

 

[okeydokey]

Completely rude and tacky. I would be very tempted to skip this party.

 

[hambirg]

Yeah. . .I don't think that's right. If they want to have this kind of party they should shell out at least for the minimum cost and then just ask the kids to stay within that cost. You wouldn't have to ask the parents to send any $$. They are asking you to supplement the cost of the party, and I think that's tacky.

 

[Darcy03231]

I once rented out a roller skating rink for my kids birthdays - we did a combined party because their birthdays are so close. As the venue would hold 500 people I let all the parents know that parents and siblings were welcome to attend if they wanted to. The children could wear their own roller blades if they had them. I paid for skates for the kids that were invited if they didn't have them, but parents had to pay for the rentals for the siblings/themselves if they wanted them to come ($2). I debated about doing it, but there was no way I could afford the rental of the place, skates for the invited kids, cake, drinks, etc. plus skate rentals all the siblings. No one complained and everyone had a great time. We ended up with over 200 people.

In the OP's case I think that's tacky. I fully expected to pay for everything associated with the invited kids, just not all the extras.

 

[scrapquitler]

Is this really any different than having a Build A Bear Party and stating that the children can pick a bear up to $14 but that they have to pay themselves for any outfits or accessories? If your child can complete the activity (ceramic painting, I assume?) without any additional cost to you, but they have the option to do additional activities, what's the big deal? Of course if they can't do the activity without an extra $$ then that's different.

 

[Cinderella94]

Is this really any different than having a Build A Bear Party and stating that the children can pick a bear up to $14 but that they have to pay themselves for any outfits or accessories? If your child can complete the activity (ceramic painting, I assume?) without any additional cost to you, but they have the option to do additional activities, what's the big deal? Of course if they can't do the activity without an extra $$ then that's different.

In the OP, she said "even if we get the cheapest item, we still need to pay."

 

[tiggger1]

In the OP, she said "even if we get the cheapest item, we still need to pay."

yeah I am thinking is that the parents said they will pay $5 a kid but the cheapest item is $10...

 

[Katy Belle]

Weird and rude! Although, last year my ds15 was invited to 2 different paintball birthday parties in which the invitation told the boys to bring money for their own paintball admission and no gifts please. I actually thought this was fine. All of the boys love paintball and it's no fun alone, so it was just kind of like an outing.I think the age of the boys mattered too. My DS payed for half out of his money and I paid for half, which was what I would have spent on a gift. Both parties fed the kids pizza and cake.

 

[samshane]

OP here - that is correct - they are paying $5, the cheapest item is $10. I guess if there were a $5 option then I wouldn't think this was so unusual - if the kids wanted something more then they could pay for something more. But there isn't a $5 option.

 

[EeyoreEma]

I'd find it weird. Around here, most parties are small and simple, but when we had the only one we've given (our kids would rather save $ for Disney!) we had it at Chick-Fil-A and paid for all the kids AND all the parents. So I guess I'd find it odd.

 

[dancin'girl]

I would never ask my guests to pay for anything. I would just invite less guests or have the party at a different venue. I have been at a party where the father went around asking for everybody to pitch in $5 for the cost of the balloon guy. I was shocked. Sometimes I don't have money on me. I guess in that case I could have told him to wait ten minutes while I run to the ATM. I thought it was crazy and tacky.

 

[scrump]

Too weird, rude and tacky for me. I'd be declining as well.

 

[Mad4Mickey]

I find it not only odd but tacky . I pay for my Granddaughters birthday parties ( she is only 2 LOL) . This last one we rented out a play place but if we went over the number we had set we had to pay extra . Someone was babysitting 4 kids and brought them with them ! I was not happy about it but I didnt say a word and paid the extra 40 bucks . It is a celebration and I didnt want our guests to pay for it . Good thing we over ordered on the pizza .

 

[pilotwife_02]

That just rubs me the wrong way. I understand stating that they will only be paying for a certain priced item (or items) and if the kids want something more expensive the parents make up the difference. But not even covering the cheapest option is not right.

In this case they need to cut the guest list in half and cover the whole amount for everyone.

 

[Magic Mom]

It's tacky, but at least they are being up front about it. It's up to you to accept or decline.