This is just so sad,,and makes me ask WHY would someone do this?? I don't call it 'playing'??

[ronandannette]

I didn't want to be the first to say it. I found her tears/crying to be almost forced. I felt the dad was more genuine, as he stayed mostly silent, but seemed to be trying very hard to not completely break down.

Please, please don't judge the grieving mother by her countenance. I've been involved in ministry activity supporting dozens and dozens of bereaved parents over the past several years. Their emotions are all over the map and can change from moment-to-moment and no two are exactly alike. There's no right way or wrong way to "present" when you've lost a child.

 

[smiths02]

Call me cynical, skeptical, unsympathetic, whatever other insult you want. I feel worse for the grandfather. The mother, while devastated, seemed to me to be almost rehearsed or acting, or at least coached, on The Today Show.

She was definitely rehearsed and the questions were coached and practiced beforehand.
I'm not saying she doesn't believe what she said or she isn't grieving, but she definitely was going over a prepared speech. (And, benefit of the doubt, she wouldn't have been able to get through it if it was candid.)

 

[PollyannaMom]

She was definitely rehearsed and the questions were coached and practiced beforehand.
I'm not saying she doesn't believe what she said or she isn't grieving, but she definitely was going over a prepared speech. (And, benefit of the doubt, she wouldn't have been able to get through it if it was candid.)

I agree - I was pretty sure someone else got her ready for the interview when I noticed her nails were even done. - Half the time, I don't get around to that for happy occasions. It would be the last thing on my mind if I was grieving.

 

[Summer2018]

She was definitely rehearsed and the questions were coached and practiced beforehand.
I'm not saying she doesn't believe what she said or she isn't grieving, but she definitely was going over a prepared speech. (And, benefit of the doubt, she wouldn't have been able to get through it if it was candid.)

Absolutely.

Someone would have to drag me out of bed, throw me in the shower, choose my clothes and dress me, put me in a car to NYC (in their case an airplane), and hand me a statement to read.

I remember when my mother died. I was a freshman in college. People had to force me to eat. My friend got me out of the house and took my sister and I shopping for black clothes and pantyhose. I was like a zombie walking in a fog.

My child? Oh heck no. I would not be functioning. It would end me.

 

[mjkacmom]

I agree - I was pretty sure someone else got her ready for the interview when I noticed her nails were even done. - Half the time, I don't get around to that for happy occasions. It would be the last thing on my mind if I was grieving.

So you think she isn’t grieving? That she is pretending to be sad but priorities getting her nails done? Heck, she was going on vacation 2 weeks ago, her nails could still be done from then.

 

[tzolkin]

So you think she isn’t grieving? That she is pretending to be sad but priorities getting her nails done? Heck, she was going on vacation 2 weeks ago, her nails could still be done from then.

I read that poster’s comments to mean the exact opposite— that the mom was grieving (and therefore needed someone else to help her rehearse what she was going to say and help her to dress and make herself look presentable for tv.)

 

[PollyannaMom]

So you think she isn’t grieving? That she is pretending to be sad but priorities getting her nails done? Heck, she was going on vacation 2 weeks ago, her nails could still be done from then.

No, like this:

I read that poster’s comments to mean the exact opposite— that the mom was grieving (and therefore needed someone else to help her rehearse what she was going to say and help her to dress and make herself look presentable for tv.)

I assumed the TV people had done all of that for her.

 

[John VN]

Grieving --- of course !!!

Preparation --- isn't she an attorney and would be well aware of what is required of a "plaintiff" ???

 

[kaytieeldr]

Oh, she's grieving, and will be for a long, long time. Just, Über demeanor seemed, well, practiced. Staged. I can't explain it, but I guess it seemed like she was putting on a show.

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Oh, she's grieving, and will be for a long, long time. Just, Über demeanor seemed, well, practiced. Staged. I can't explain it, but I guess it seemed like she was putting on a show.

I have to wonder if her job as a prosecuting attorney gave her some of those skills, and now they are just natural to her.

 

[luvsJack]

I have to wonder if her job as a prosecuting attorney gave her some of those skills, and now they are just natural to her.

I think this is probably true. Being an attorney, she is probably used to being “ready” and “on” when answering questions. She would naturally expect to be prepared. And to some extent, yes, putting on a show.

I would think in that kind of situation a person has to go into a sort of auto pilot to get through. As an attorney, that may be her auto pilot.

 

[mnrose]

I think this is probably true. Being an attorney, she is probably used to being “ready” and “on” when answering questions. She would naturally expect to be prepared. And to some extent, yes, putting on a show.

I would think in that kind of situation a person has to go into a sort of auto pilot to get through. As an attorney, that may be her auto pilot.

Yup. I definitely have an "auto-pilot" that comes out when I need it to. I recently had to do something very distasteful...on the inside, I was horrified by the whole thing and wanted to throw up. On the outside, neutral observers said "man, you nailed that...never want to get on your bad side." Because I have DECADES of practice.

That being said, not sure that side would "come out" if my child had died in such a horrific manner. Would my professional training take over? Maybe in public moments. In private moments, I'd be a mess.

 

[luvsJack]

Yup. I definitely have an "auto-pilot" that comes out when I need it to. I recently had to do something very distasteful...on the inside, I was horrified by the whole thing and wanted to throw up. On the outside, neutral observers said "man, you nailed that...never want to get on your bad side." Because I have DECADES of practice.

That being said, not sure that side would "come out" if my child had died in such a horrific manner. Would my professional training take over? Maybe in public moments. In private moments, I'd be a mess.

Oh, definitely me too! I would be completely unable to function at all. I was that way after each of my parents died. It was like I was just floating along going whichever way someone directed me. They would ask me questions about the funeral and I would nod or say "ok" or "I don't care, you decide" because my mind couldn't really come up with a coherent answer. If I lost a child or grandchild, I am not sure I would be able to get out of bed at all.