The things we do for our spawn...

[emmybee]

"I'm never going to own a minivan." - We bought one just before I got pregnant with ODD.

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• "We are NOT going to use the TV as a babysitter all the time." - Yeah, that went right out the door from the get go. One of ODD's favorites was Bunny Town on the Disney Channel.

I tried to edit your comment so that I could respond to the above bullet points. My lack of computing skills screwed that up, so please excuse me

Your comment did remind me of a couple of things. I bought a new Volvo C30 a couple of months before I got pregnant. Both were on purpose, but not well thought out as far as timing, lol. It's a cute little hatchback identical in color to the one seen in the first Twilight movie (I think).

That little car was the one we took our girl home in. By that time, I loved that car so much, it probably had a large part in my not wanting another kid. Ha ha! While nice, I made sure the stroller was compact enough to fit in the trunk. Food was never allowed, but it's not like we really had to drive very far in our daily lives.

We did eventually get a 4-door, but since it was a stick, I still used my C30 regularly when I had to drive. My kid and I have spent many a mile in that little car. 14 years later and she's still with us now, cute as a button when washed...meaning the car.

As far as tv, and tech, I never pretended that was something I would try to limit. I grew up on tv myself, and I figured I turned out alright, lol. My hubby would sometimes talk about limiting, but mean wife that I am, that wasn't a fight I was remotely willing to wage.

The thread is a fun read, everyone!

 

[hhisc16]

My daycare payment is almost as much as my mortgage payment...
Crazy prices and tough to find any daycare allowing new kids during these times.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

My daycare payment is almost as much as my mortgage payment...
Crazy prices and tough to find any daycare allowing new kids during these times.

Pre-pandemic I knew of a few people who went down to 1 income household because the costs of daycare either wiped out the other person's income or their income just slightly was above the costs of the daycare so in the end it usually wasn't worth it especially if they were concerned about illness and taking off work, other appointments, etc.

During the pandemic it's def. been hard to even find daycare. I know right now it's been really tough here with the schools cancelling classed due to staffing shortages and/or covid illness/other illnesses. What daycare is open (be it a facility or home) is stretched thin themselves and many have closed. Over on the other side of the state line from me the main city there (which has the most population of all the cities in our metro) their Chamber of Commerce said since the pandemic started 40% of licensed childcare businesses have completely closed down.

 

[hhisc16]

Pre-pandemic I knew of a few people who went down to 1 income household because the costs of daycare either wiped out the other person's income or their income just slightly was above the costs of the daycare so in the end it usually wasn't worth it especially if they were concerned about illness and taking off work, other appointments, etc.

During the pandemic it's def. been hard to even find daycare. I know right now it's been really tough here with the schools cancelling classed due to staffing shortages and/or covid illness/other illnesses. What daycare is open (be it a facility or home) is stretched thin themselves and many have closed. Over on the other side of the state line from me the main city there (which has the most population of all the cities in our metro) their Chamber of Commerce said since the pandemic started 40% of licensed childcare businesses have completely closed down.

Both of us are teachers and luckily the university in town we graduated from made an open slot for us at their daycare. But all of the daycare prices are crazy high.

 

[sam_gordon]

Also, FWIW, I used to work for the athletic dept at an SEC Div1 college as a football tutor. I can promise you that in football, at least, at least half the guys who got scholarship offers did not come up through club sports.

I'm pretty sure that's probably because there's not "club" football. Not like there is in baseball, basketball, soccer, softball, cheerleading, and LAX(?).

No one should count on the money they pay for their child to participate in an extra curricular as an "investment" that they'll get back when they go to college. Does that mean you shouldn't HOPE you might get some money? No.

 

[dez1978]

lso, FWIW, I used to work for the athletic dept at an SEC Div1 college as a football tutor. I can promise you that in football, at least, at least half the guys who got scholarship offers did not come up through club sports. They played for their podunk town's school teams starting in elementary school, and they got noticed because they had just that much natural talent for the game that they attracted the attention of sportswriters and the coaches' grapevine, and often had an older relative who had also played college or pro football, and had been at least moderately successful. They did summer camp programs in high school, but that was usually the only special development they got before college. I had a job because the schools they attended were sub-par, but they graduated because their football prowess was the pride of the whole town, and flunking them out of school was simply unthinkable. They ended up with me because they could play football like Yo Yo Ma plays the cello, but they could barely read Cat in the Hat.

Thats good to hear. I always worry that going to such a small school would limit my kids sports wise. We chose the school bc it's small but has a TON of money and is rated one of the best schools in our area. But there aren't a ton of options here for those clubs for any sports. Idk that either of my kids will turn out to be that good, hard to tell if they actually have the talent or if its just parental bias lol. Since the teams they are on now are coached by dads, of course their kids are the qb and whatever. We'll see when they hit 7th grade and have school coaches. I def think my oldest has the talent, his size will be the problem. I am ot exaggerating at all when I say he is 73 pounds as a running back/tight end and was playing against teams whose defensive linemen were 280 and 5ft 8 lol. I wanted to ask what they were feeding those kids to have them that size as 6th graders lol. Hopefully our team hits puberty before next season and hits some growth spurts bc they are all small.

I really had no idea that sports would take up this much time as a parent. When I was a kid in the 80's my parents never came to any of my school stuff. Like I don't remember a single school concert or game that I was in that they ever came to other than 8th grade and HS graduation. And I wasn't really allowed to be in many things bc we lived so far out in the country that with their work schedule they wouldn't have been any way for me to get home after practices. I had no idea that 3/4 of my year would require sitting at practice 3+ nights a week with games/tournaments every weekend. Like next week we have a wrestling tournament Sunday, practice Monday night, Tuesday night we are wrestling in a tournament an hr away at like, 6 pm. Wed is practice. Saturday we have to be at a tournament 2 hrs away at 730 am, and another tournament on Sunday. I complain about it every weekend but I wouldn't have it any other way. I always ask why I signed my kids up for sports that require me to get up at 4 am on a weekend when I don't even do that for Disney lol

 

[dez1978]

My daycare payment is almost as much as my mortgage payment...
Crazy prices and tough to find any daycare allowing new kids during these times.

One of the bonuses of where I live is daycare is pretty cheap. The most I've ever paid for fulltime care at a center was 155/week per kid. And that was in the infant room, which in my experince is always the most expensive. Last year for before and after school care and full days all summer and most days when they are out of school during the school year I paid $6400 total for 2 kids. That seems high to me but I know from reading other posts it's pretty cheap. I pay $85/week per kid for full time care in the summer and it includes breakfast, lunch and snacks. I know some places parents have to send in food too

 

[hhisc16]

One of the bonuses of where I live is daycare is pretty cheap. The most I've ever paid for fulltime care at a center was 155/week per kid. And that was in the infant room, which in my experince is always the most expensive. Last year for before and after school care and full days all summer and most days when they are out of school during the school year I paid $6400 total for 2 kids. That seems high to me but I know from reading other posts it's pretty cheap. I pay $85/week per kid for full time care in the summer and it includes breakfast, lunch and snacks. I know some places parents have to send in food too

We pay 180 a week year round for one kid in the infant room. Crazy to even find one allowing new people also.

 

[dez1978]

We pay 180 a week year round for one kid in the infant room. Crazy to even find one allowing new people also.

That is pretty reasonable. When I was paying 155 a week that was 10 years ago. We've been at the same daycare for 8 years but I know that for infants it is really tough to find them a spot. My friend owns a daycare and she stopped having an infant room altogether bc it wasn't profitable at a price point she felt comfortable charging. I think our center only has 4 infant spots and they are pretty much all filled by younger siblings vs new families. I think we probably only have 1 year of daycare left before my kids are old enough to manage being home alone all day, fingers crossed. I'm hoping 12&10 they'll be able to handle it. After school they'd be fine now for 30 min, but I don't trust them to get on the bus in the morning and they def aren't ready to be home on days when I have to work and school is out.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

While I don't disagree with most of that, those kids in your area will have a MUCH better shot at scholarships to big colleges, the kind that go on to be professional athletes than the kids here. Our kids can't compete with those kids and aren't going on to play for Notre Dame or Alabama or Georgia. Our kids will be lucky to get to play on a no name, unranked community college team if they are lucky. I'd LOVE for my kids to have that kind of opportunity to play on those types of teams because I think they would excel at it but those teams don't exist here. And when my kids get to their Senior year here, college scouts aren't coming to schools like mine. So while I see your point about it being a lot, and that everyone should have the chance to play and have fun, those teams will always exist and kids will always get pushed out for those kids who lived in the areas that had those teams and whose parents had the time and $ to pay for it. Heck, the bigger town near me, they have a youth football league that plays in the same league as ours. They have 90ish kids so they split it into 3 teams. those 3 teams are stacked. team A is the kids who will go on to play at their high school level and might have a chance to go to a big college, because the school is huge. Team B will be the back up players on that team. And Team C are the kids who likely won't make it on to the team at all or will be 3rd string at best. We dont live there tho bc while the sports are better, the school sucks.

My son played his sport from age 4 through 22 and had a good run. I just want to say that, generally speaking, if a kid has enough talent, college coaches will find him or her, no matter what type of team they’re on. It does help to be around the right people, be well liked, and be self-assertive if they want to play in college, IMO. Those things help get the word out. In the younger years there is a lot of “Daddy ball”, but as they get older they can be recognized for their talents when coaches who don’t have kids on the team become involved. And don’t underestimate C Team players, especially on younger teams. I saw firsthand that it was some of the C Team players that actually stuck with it when others dropped out, as they had the drive to play even if they weren’t on what were considered the better teams, and strove to improve, maybe were smaller earlier on, etc. They may just be the ones who don’t have parents or friends coaching. D1 schools have their picks by sophomore year of HS, pretty much. It’s not always all it’s cracked up to be, either, if the kid gets no playing time and becomes unhappy, then is stuck due to scholarship money. (And for some of the sports previously listed, it’s not that much.) I have heard hundreds of stories. Bottom line, if your kid likes to play, even if there aren’t great teams around, do what you can to support them, and you never know what can happen. I know my DH and DS built some equipment to specifications and DS practiced out in the yard by himself for hours and hours many days to hone his skills, which helped him get on a college team. Besides college scholarships, there are many other benefits to playing and being part of a team besides financial, like self-discipline, leadership, learning how to be an integral part of a team, etc. BTW some of those community college players play there for a reason, they have a good season and they may be able to get onto a better team after having a good run there than they would’ve on a mediocre HS team. Most kids who love to play would rather play anywhere than not play at all.