The Battle For My Wallet V: Beyond the Number IV (Chapter Eighteen, p.75, 5/18)

[tina_la]

Really? Hm. Ok:

Hero Complex: Check.
Goatee: Check.
Impressive Guns: Check(ish).
Retractable Clear Dome Over Your Head: Not seeing it. You edited that part out of the picture, didn't you. Yeah. That would TOTALLY give you away.



Apparently you hold on loosely. And you DO let go. If you cling to tightly. You're gonna lose it. You're gonna lose control.



So tell us. Where did you celebrate the big 1-3? And why weren't we invited? You kept all of the BGPC for yourself, didn't you?



And BGPC.

For all my good-hearted goofing on you Z, I believe this with all my heart.



Or nap. Not that I'd know anything about that. But I read things.



Ok, really, it's not the 765 Britney, NObama, or U2 lyric references that bring us flocking to read your trippies.

It's this. It's you. God is God. ZZUB is ZZUB. And I don't think we'd want it any other way.



Channeling Seuss I see you were not.
For all you discussed is what goes in the pot
And swirls down, down, down and right out of sight.
Much like in Canada that odiferous night.
The ginger was plenty, the teppan not bad
As ZZUB reflected on the dinner he'd had.
Then bit in the rear by a need so acute
He bolted and ran on a 'northerly' route.
I've ne'er heard so much talk of pee, poo and sweat,
Though admittedly ZZUB has one chapter yet
To share with all his admiring fans
Before he hopefully share with all of us his plans
For another trip to La's Land of Yellow.
One more 'Journey into' what ZZUB could smell - oh
And don't forget vomit with a hidden Mouse head.
ZZUB this chappie truly left me DED.

one of the funniest odes ever! NOZZUB.

 

[ZZUB]

Maybe you could stretch things out after this one by doing some more compare and contrast postings in great detail, to tide us over till the next one.

I don't know, I think some would argue I've stretched this out long enough. But thank you for wanting to read more.

Somewhere in the heavens, Theodor Geisel is applauding while alternately holding his nose. Bravo.

Though I don't believe in God, your belief in God is so touching and enough for me, to believe that you believe. Thank you for that.

I will put you on the short list of people we'd be willing to rent our DVC points to. It would be our honor.

Can't wait for the rest.

I hope I made Dr. Geisel proud. DVCTiff, thank you for being willling to rent your DVC points to us. Since you don't have to clean up after us, I imagine if we did rent from you, you'd have no problems with us.

Thank you also for your candid assesment of your position with God. You know, I didn't always believe in God either. I am eternally grateful for the men and women of faith who went before me and helped me discover Him. If I am one of those people in your life, then won't we have a great time in Heaven? For what it's worth, that you chose to capitalize God in each reference to Him speaks volumes about your character. I will put you on the short list of people I would be willing to rent from.

Tinkerbellarella:I was all set to give you mad props for your excellent rhyming, and yet, on closer examination, I realized I'd been hate-crimed.

Hero Complex: Check.
Goatee: Check.
Impressive Guns: Check(ish).

Check(ish)?! I don't think so. These babies are pure steel! You bump into my guns, you bounce back is what I'm saying. With a big ol' dent in your head.

So tell us. Where did you celebrate the big 1-3? And why weren't we invited? You kept all of the BGPC for yourself, didn't you?

At a temple in South Florida where I was bar mitzvahed (remember, I was raised Jewish). I don't recall any Butter Grilled Pound Cake but there was a spread you think you died and went to heaven. And a very nice, very moist cake emblazzoned with the words, "Mazel Tov."

Channeling Seuss I see you were not.
For all you discussed is what goes in the pot
And swirls down, down, down and right out of sight.
Much like in Canada that odiferous night.
The ginger was plenty, the teppan not bad
As ZZUB reflected on the dinner he'd had.
Then bit in the rear by a need so acute
He bolted and ran on a 'northerly' route.
I've ne'er heard so much talk of pee, poo and sweat,
Though admittedly ZZUB has one chapter yet
To share with all his admiring fans
Before he hopefully share with all of us his plans
For another trip to La's Land of Yellow.
One more 'Journey into' what ZZUB could smell - oh
And don't forget vomit with a hidden Mouse head.
ZZUB this chappie truly left me DED.

That totally rocks, Tinkerbellarella! Thank you very much for the time you spent writing that. It almost, almost makes up for your ill-advised crack on my guns.

one of the funniest odes ever! NOZZUB.

None taken. I agree whole-heartedly.

 

[Tinkerbellarella]

Check(ish)?! I don't think so. These babies are pure steel! You bump into my guns, you bounce back is what I'm saying. With a big ol' dent in your head.

Z, oh one of the copious gunnage, what could I hath possibly been thinking?! Perhaps I was so mesmerized by said gunnular display that I foundeth mine own self to be completely disorientated and knew not what I spoke.

Or maybe the plastic-y guns you were posing by had me confused.

Or maybe I just can't come to grips with only "picturing" you based on your knees, calves, big boy shorts, a goatee and a single gun.

Or am just perturbed that I'm trying to 'picture' you at all.

And yes, I'm aware of where the line for the Ignore quilting bee is. But is it a Fastpass?

That totally rocks, Tinkerbellarella! Thank you very much for the time you spent writing that. It almost, almost makes up for your ill-advised crack on my guns.

That's what you get when I allow my brain to take a recess from working for 1,100 lawyers. Not that you'd know anything about that. But I'm sure your secretary could write a novel. I'd be particularly interested in the chapter entitled, "Swiss Cake Rolls: The Point of No Return".

Roll that tide I keep hearing about.

 

[PirateFish989]

Funny thing, when I was in college, I never thought about what happened on furniture in the common areas. I focused my neuroses on other things then. But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't take a nap on the TV room couch now. I wonder, do they even still have TV rooms?

TV rooms are now called lounges.

Really? Hm. Ok:

Hero Complex: Check.
Goatee: Check.
Impressive Guns: Check(ish).
Retractable Clear Dome Over Your Head: Not seeing it. You edited that part out of the picture, didn't you. Yeah. That would TOTALLY give you away.

Tinkabellarella, that made me laugh out loud. Which caused my roommate to give me a strange what-was-that-for look (I know she was thinking "Oh good grief! She's reading that silly Disney website AGAIN," and then she rolls her eyes). To which I snickered some more and continued to read.

Channeling Seuss I see you were not.
For all you discussed is what goes in the pot
And swirls down, down, down and right out of sight.
Much like in Canada that odiferous night.
The ginger was plenty, the teppan not bad
As ZZUB reflected on the dinner he'd had.
Then bit in the rear by a need so acute
He bolted and ran on a 'northerly' route.
I've ne'er heard so much talk of pee, poo and sweat,
Though admittedly ZZUB has one chapter yet
To share with all his admiring fans
Before he hopefully share with all of us his plans
For another trip to La's Land of Yellow.
One more 'Journey into' what ZZUB could smell - oh
And don't forget vomit with a hidden Mouse head.
ZZUB this chappie truly left me DED.

Theodore Geisel would be proud! And impressed. As rhyming like that is hard to do. I've tried.

Everytime Dr. Seuss is mentioned in this thread, I can't help but think about the library at my college, which is named after him.

 

[ldadar]

It’s 3 in the morning and all through the house
Not a creature is stirring except for my mouse
And my fingers and brain cells, they’re stirring too
I need me some pound cake or beezle nut stew
(Please not the hot oil, don’t fry me alive
I might stay up writing ‘til a quarter past 5.
Although my name used to be Horton, (not who,)
This is about ZZUB, and Disney and poo)

I do not know why I am dis board obsessed
Why I have to read LaLa, Sneezie and all of the rest
But I’m happy to be here to hang out with you
I want to be one of the cool kidz, too.
I‘ve been writing a trippie, it’s really quite good
At least in my head. (I’ve not yet typed a word.)
Oops! Good and word they don’t really rhyme
Perhaps I should post this now at this time
Before I stay up all through the night
thinking of Disney and all its delight

Thank you, thank you, thank you all
For all of the chuckles no matter how small

Thank you. Thank you for showing the love
Straight from ZZUB’s heart and heaven above.

 

[nicolemarie]

did Toontown really,
REALLY smell like poo?

I'm saddest ever. I've never had that experience.

Life is crazy in the NM house this week - too much going on and not enough time to do it all, but AS ALWAYS, thanks for the awesome installment!

I hate to see this report coming to an end. Thanks so much for sharing your tale with us. It's been a hilarious ride.

 

[LaLa]

Toilets are stinky and voilets are too.

I have no doubt that as soon as I post this, NM will have fixed that but I couldn't resist.

I‘ve been writing a trippie, it’s really quite good
At least in my head. (I’ve not yet typed a word.)

This made me laugh out loud. Awesome prose.

And yes, I'm aware of where the line for the Ignore quilting bee is. But is it a Fastpass?

It may not be as Fastpass worthy as Maelstrom but stick around. We've got cake. A nice, moist one emblazoned with the words "Happy Birthday Elvis"

Sadly, no. Mrs. Z isn't crazy go nuts for cake like her husband. She's all about cookies.

You should take her to Universal. They have good cookies.

 

[Yzma and Kronk]

Borg NM!

I so happy.

I've just emerged from Birthday and Mother's Day festivities to find the second last chapter of Zzub.

Ah, the wonderful smells of Disney!

And put to rhyme too.

Zzub - great chapter.

Looking forward to the end....so to speak.

 

[ZZUB]

Z, oh one of the copious gunnage

That's more like it.

And yes, I'm aware of where the line for the Ignore quilting bee is. But is it a Fastpass?

You're no where near Ignoreland. Anymore. You were, but you've redeemed yourself nicely. Carry on.

Thank you. Thank you for showing the love
Straight from ZZUB’s heart and heaven above.

'preace the compliment. I enjoyed the poem as well.

did Toontown really, REALLY smell like poo?

Not just poo. It was pee, sweat and poo. With a hint of some other smell we couldn't identify. Maybe burnt cheese.

I'm saddest ever. I've never had that experience.

You're saddest ever you've never had your nose assaulted with pee/poo/sweat and burnt cheese?! What's wrong with you?!

I hate to see this report coming to an end.

Yes, we all know how you hate endings. Which must explain why you haven't finished your last TR.

Toilets are stinky and voilets are too.

You do NOT want to mess with a voilet! I used one once down in the Bahamas. Scary stuff.

Awesome prose.

Actually, it was poety. It had a metric structure.

I've just emerged from Birthday and Mother's Day festivities to find the second last chapter of Zzub.

Happy birthday YaK! What's that now? 29?



To any and all interested readers: Update Monday will come early. I plan to post the last chapter this coming Monday, May 19th. See you then.

 

[CRSNDSNY]

To any and all interested readers: Update Monday will come early. I plan to post the last chapter this coming Monday, May 19th. See you then.

Gee, do you think you have any interested readers on this thread??!!

 

[LaLa]

You do NOT want to mess with a voilet! I used one once down in the Bahamas. Scary stuff.

I'm sure it came away from the experience saying "You do NOT want to mess with a ZZUB!"

Gee, do you think you have any interested readers on this thread??!!

I don't know about yall but I'm not interested in the least. It's too confusing and long for me.

I'm bucking tradition and picking a new smilie. Drive. It's the new FHOAM.

 

[LISAMWDW]

Gee, do you think you have any interested readers on this thread??!!

Not the last chapter!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Yzma and Kronk]

Happy birthday YaK! What's that now? 29?


To any and all interested readers: Update Monday will come early. I plan to post the last chapter this coming Monday, May 19th. See you then.

Thanks for the birthday wishes Zzub - early! I'm not going to be 29 for a few more months.

It was my DS's 10th on Mother's Day.

It was soooo nice to share the day with him.

On his 5th/Mother's Day we celebrated at the MK. And were pre-dreamed with free Disney Candy right outside the poo/pee/burnt cheese section of Toontown! The CM saw his "Birthday Button" and asked if she could give him "free" stuff. Duh, yes!

I see you are finishing on Victoria Day/Fireworks Day/The big two-four long weekend here in Canada.

Mel will be pleased.

Or interested.

 

[lisalonglash]

Great stuff! Looking forward to the next installment (but I'm tres annoyed that the trip report is almost over ). Couldn't you just drag the TR out until your next trip?

 

[ldadar]

Who noticed the google ads? If you need help with bo or bad breath, click away.

(No mention of toon town pee, poop, or burnt cheese smells.)

 

[Liz]

Zzub, you're making me cheat on my husband! We're supposed to read your posts together as a family but I can't help myself and end up sneak reading them first! Then when we read them together I have to act like its the first time I've heard your witty prose! I think they're on to me though and yeah, I might have admitted my addiction to Zzub. Do I get extra credit for reading it twice??

 

[HeyIt'sMe]

Thanks for another great installment.

Your hiding a note at the WL made me think of this .....

In the years we don't go to Disney one of the places we go is Destin, FL. When we do go to Destin we stay in the same resort, same unit.

The first time we stayed at the resort was in 1999 when our DD was 2. She had some Teletubby stickers with her and before we left I stuck a purple one ("Tinky Winky") under the drawer in the master bath vanity to see if when we returned one day it would be there.

We returned to Destin in 2001 and the first thing I did when we got into the room was head to check on the sticker. Two years later Tinky Winky was still there.

We didn't get back to Destin until 2007 so many years had passed since we last saw Tinky Winky. Would you believe he was STILL there??? But someone had discovered him because his body had been ripped off and then reattached under where his head was still securely adhered. I took some pictures and then removed Tinky Winky so we could take him home. I figured 8 years was long enough!

 

[disney junky]

Zzub. Thanks for the great installment. I think I'm going to steal your idea. Do I have to pay you royalties? After all, you're the attorney.

 

[Tinkerbellarella]

Tinkabellarella, that made me laugh out loud. Which caused my roommate to give me a strange what-was-that-for look (I know she was thinking "Oh good grief! She's reading that silly Disney website AGAIN," and then she rolls her eyes). To which I snickered some more and continued to read.

Glad to have passed on a smile to you.

Whenever I'm on the couch on my laptop while the BF is watching TV and I laugh, he looks sideways at my screen, sees the wealth of smilies and character avatars that abound on the DIS and just rolls his eyes and shakes his head.

In true ZZUB fashion - poo to him.

It may not be as Fastpass worthy as Maelstrom but stick around. We've got cake. A nice, moist one emblazoned with the words "Happy Birthday Elvis"

I don't plan on going anywhere.
Except maybe over to your trippie to give it some love.
And to TarzanKat's pre-trippie because she's my long lost sister.
And to my own pre-trippie to update it. Once I'm done procrastinating on that front.
And to my 1,359 other subscriptions.
And to the Arches for a chocolate shake.

But other than that, I'll be here.

You're no where near Ignoreland. Anymore. You were, but you've redeemed yourself nicely. Carry on.

Is it sad that I'm strangely drawn to Ignoreland? Like it's got its own gravitational pull? Maybe like the good girls going after the bad boys theory? I dunno.

La did say they have cake.

Which makes me wonder why you haven't put yourself on Ignore.

[quote="Gunner";25104938]To any and all interested readers: Update Monday will come early. I plan to post the last chapter this coming Monday, May 19th. See you then.

[/QUOTE]

This makes me sad.
And numb.
And I'm a little hungry.
But I don't think that last part is related.

 

[TarzansKat]

And to TarzanKat's pre-trippie because she's my long lost sister.

Here, here!

Is it sad that I'm strangely drawn to Ignoreland? Like it's got its own gravitational pull? Maybe like the good girls going after the bad boys theory? I dunno.

Did you by any chance date someone sad, lonely, and misunderstood in high school?

La did say they have cake.

Which makes me wonder why you haven't put yourself on Ignore.

And I'm a little hungry.
But I don't think that last part is related.

Might I point out to assuage your hunger that McDonald's is offering free chicken sandwiches today with the purchase of a medium or large drink?

:::scuffle, scuffle, slam, car engine revs, peals out:::

Must have been ZZUB!