Teen Safety Disney Cruise

[ilovetexas]

OP, your school seems to have skipped some talking points in your science class. In the last few years, it's been discovered that the portion of the brain responsible for complex reasoning skills isn't fully formed until you are in your early to mid twenties. Right vs. wrong, risk analysis, emotional control, etc. are all controlled by that portion of the brain.

Regardless of your individual maturity level compared to your age, people in their teens (and often early twenties) just make amazingly bad choices. Sometimes that's fine and sometimes it will have a negative impact on the rest of your life. It's our job as parents to protect you from yourself.

My children have exactly the same amount of freedom on a ship (not just DCL) as they do in their daily lives. Two of them I can give quite a bit of freedom, one of them has to have constant supervision due to recent bad choices. NONE of them get to be out unsupervised with random people I don't know until 2 in the morning.

Educate yourself on this subject and you may better understand our point:

http://www.human.cornell.edu/hd/outreach-extension/risky-decision-making-in-adolescents.cfm

http://brainconnection.positscience.com/decision-making-is-still-a-work-in-progress-for-teenagers/

 

[su_A_ve]

OPs point of view is that of a typical teen. Completely opposite than that of an adult, no matter how it's looked at.

 

[Suz D]

I completely understand where your coming from that yes I am 16 and yes it is easy to play the I can be reckless card. As well as I agree that not all teenagers should be able to stay out as late as they wish because not all have attained a high enough rate of maturity for it. The largest underlying belief that I have on this whole issue of curfew is that you only have so long to spend on a ship and my family takes one vacation a year. So why waste 10-12 hours of your day asleep when you can enjoy more of your vacation. Just a response to how it is unacceptable to be out at 2 AM. The teen as well as the tween club close after midnight. There are counselors there to make sure everyone in the club is safe so I don't understand how the fact that it is late at night and still being protected by 3-4 counselors is unsafe. In all reality there's more people cleaning the ship awake than any other group, along with the fact that there are video cameras that are constantly monitored around the clock for safety.

Didn't read the whole thread so someone else probably already pointed this out, but a video camera doesn't provide safety or protection. It is a possible deterrent but sometimes the only thing it's good for is solving a crime.

 

[PizzieDuster]

Didn't read the whole thread so someone else probably already pointed this out, but a video camera doesn't provide safety or protection. It is a possible deterrent but sometimes the only thing it's good for is solving a crime.

Yes. Just use your best judgement.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1heg_dk_bM

 

[PizzieDuster]

Oops, double post.

 

[Teencruiser]

I would like to comment on the notion of the teen not being mature enough to make the right decision. I would like to counter by saying that you propose a right or wrong decision. However, in scenarios like this there is no one right answer. There is an infinite amount of decisions that you could make and whether you made the right one is a matter of opinion. In a scenario like this it does not matter how mature you are, someone who is 16 could make the same decision as a 26 year old even though ones brain has been more developed.

 

[disjest8]

As a parent of 8 children ranging in age from 10 years old to 30 years old, I think that several of you might disagree with what you have posted 10 years from now, not just the OP. And I think that applies to both sides of spectrum. There is no right or wrong answer. EVERY child is different and every child requires slightly different rules. I can tell you what I should have done with each of my children over the age of 23, but I am unclear about what I should do with my soon to be 11 and 12 year olds.
Hind sight is 20/20.

 

[Castillo Mom]

I mostly agree with the OP. With the caveat, each family has to decide what's right for them. And, more importantly, each parent(s) for each of their children.

My teens have been on four or five cruises, starting as pre-teens. They have always had more freedom on DCL than they had at home.

We have raised them to be good decision-makers, and are blessed that they have accepted that raising without much trouble. We have to restrict them more at home because so much of their environment is not controlled. They have curfews, have to let us know where they are when not in school or pre-arranged activities, have to be willing to introduce us to any of their friends. Even worse - have to let us view their on-line activities whenever we ask!! Yes, we're "those kind" of parents! But here's the key - neither one of them have EVER given us a reason to not trust them. They tried once or twice when they were younger, but found out they didn't like that much. (And yes, I fully appreciate how fortunate we are!!)

So why more freedom on DCL? Because there are counselors keeping an eye on them. They do get asked to return to their staterooms when out "after hours." They are always hanging out with others, and they tend to choose the right "others." I look at it as a great opportunity to allow them another level of freedom/decision making opportunities, in an environment that is more safe than our home city is!

But. . .if they were not so level headed, I would feel compelled to continue tighter limits, to help them learn to make better decisions.

Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes (but I can never remember who said it):

Life is a series of choices. Choose wisely.

Agreed! I too have been blessed with responsible kids as it relates to choice of friends and adhering to curfews. My sons were teens when they went on their first Disney cruise in '07 and because they were together and well behaved, I allowed them to stay in the club until closing.

They are now all young adults who still live at home (tough economy) and they still have the respect to let me know that they're going out and when they will be home.

Parents must decide on a case-by-case basis. Depends on the child. Oops, sorry, depends on the teen!

 

[cmurray234]

OP, I'm sorry to laugh, but I just can't help myself.

Your iron-clad confidence in your own maturity and safety is typical and about as reliable as my 11 yo son's sincere and vociferous assurances that he "won't get hurt" jumping from the top of our swing set, having a lightsaber battle with the neighbor kids or playing "wrestling" in the back yard.

It doesn't mean that I don't let him do those things…well, probably not the swing set jumping, but the rest. I do. I just do it with the understanding that at least 10% of the time, I'm going to have to patch him up.

If I might offer a little "stodgy 40 year-old lady" advice, I would suggest that you not get too complacent aboard ship. There are bad people there. Some of those bad people are teenagers, people you'll be sharing your time with in Vibe at 2 am. Some of those bad people are adults who know that there are unsupervised teens at that nightclub at 2 am.

Cruise ships are floating towns and should be treated as such.

 

[MakiraMarlena]

Sometimes it seems the last person you should ask about teen safety is an actual teenager.

You do realize there are people onboard. Wherever there are people, there's the potential to be some bad ones. And you can't tell the bad ones from the good ones by just looking at them.

Parents should be telling kids to never go into anyone else's stateroom, and never invite anyone into their own stateroom. And to never allow someone to take you someplace isolated. If they frighten you, yell and run in the other direction. The good thing about there being so many people on a ship is that there will always be non-isolated places to run toward. Of course then you have to wonder about how likely your kids will be to actually follow your instructions.

A curfew, or not, is up to the parents. Not the teenager.

If you're 22 and someone asks you just say "I'm 22." But there's some good rules of thumb for adults too regarding getting too isolated.

 

[JohnDS]

my kid, my rules. isn't this horse dead yet?

 

[tinkerone]

my kid, my rules. isn't this horse dead yet?

hahahaha, thats exactly what i thought when i saw the tread pop back up.

where does an old thread go to die…….it doesn't!

 

[WaltDisney2014]

Thanks for all your info. It is wonderful how many teens show their own personal responsibility by posting on this thread. 3 CHEERS FOR YOU!