Teen bullying leads to a double suicide

[Tiger926]

No. It's what we say when someone says those that have been victims of bullying should "learn how to let things roll off their back" or "just need to ignore the bullying".

I don't think this is going to be understood...

Tiger

 

[akhenaten]

A friend of mine, his daughter was friends with these girls. It is so so so sad. I cannot imagine how alone they must have felt to do something like this. Bullying HAS TO stop! And, we need to start teaching our kids 1) to not bully but 2) to not TAKE the bullying!!! Stand up for themselves. I just hate it hate it hate it!

I worry so much about how things will play out for my kids in school....

I agree with you bullying is awful!! and the type of bullying has changed, with the access to cell phones and sites like FB it can be 24 hours!
But we also need to look at how we can make the children who are bullied stronger and the other kids who witness bullying , know that they need to stand up for those who are weaker.. not join in!!

Just such a tragic story!!

 

[Goofyluver]

I don't think this is going to be understood...

Tiger

Me either...

How about sticking up for yourself? I've been bullied…while my parents were divorcing. I know what it's like to have nowhere to turn. But eventually everyone has to learn to rise up one way or another. Yeah it's hard and some kids take FOREVER. But the forever defeatist attitude only teaches kids to be victims.

 

[Uncle Remus]

Women should just ignore that sexual harassment at work 'n if raped, well, Darlin', just let it run off your back.

 

[castleview]

Women should just ignore that sexual harassment at work 'n if raped, well, Darlin', just let it run off your back.

Oh stop. A kick to the man's mid section stops that.

 

[Goofyluver]

Oh stop. A kick to the man's mid section stops that.

Yikes. Hope you were joking.

Just wanted to quote ya' in case you decided to edit.

 

[PaulaSB12]

I'm not blaming the victim. They can't help how they are raised. "change you prospective". My perspective is rather clear. what you are saying translates to me as enabling the weak vs empowering them to be stronger.

Yes, some children lack the ability to be kind but guess what, those children grow up and become adults. If you can't learn to process and deal with it as a child how are you ever going to function as an adult. Many people here on the dis do not like me for whatever reason they have. They are entitled to that opinion though and I'm not about to hang myself because I'm not liked or because someone is talking smack to me or about me.
It's a hard rough world out there sad thing is that many kids will not be able to handle it.

The kind of bullying that is going on now is a lot worse than ever before, cases in the uk have included
a child tied up and whipped with a skipping rope (the dinner lady who told the parents what had happened got the sack)
a boy hung by the neck
a girl stripped half naked and pictures taken, when the headmaster was informed it was ignored.
we are not talking mild name calling but "bullying" these kids are pushedto the point of killing themselves but you are blaming the victims. Viewing something else in the same way. Lets stop schools from keeping peanuts away from kids allergic if they can't cope with it in school how are they going to do it after they leave school and if a few die because of it then they should have been able to have been able to cope with it.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

I guess you haven't read any of my posts. I am a teacher - I live at school!

I don't agree with much of what you say, so we'll have to agree to disagree...You clearly don't have any understanding of just how serious bullying is these days...Telling kids to go and fight their own battles (pardon the pun) is not an acceptable answer when Sally is being called a ***** all day long at school, or Johnny is being pushed into the toilet.

Tiger

I'm guessing that the word you used is about Sallys bedroom activity or does it rhyme with witch?

Should this occur no but at the same time is Sally a **** ? is she conducting herself in a fashion that will make her gain that title OR is it that she is very pretty and girls are jealous. If its the first one then Sally needs to learn to either not conduct herself in that fashion OR be who she is and not apologize for it. If it's the later then she is going to have to learn to deal with the fact that she is beautiful and girls and women will always have something to say and to ignore them because they just wish they were her.

 

[castleview]

Yikes. Hope you were joking.

Just wanted to quote ya' in case you decided to edit.

If it ever got physical, then I don't see the problem. As for verbal sexual harassment, I was able to defuse that. You'd be surprised what a simple "knock it off" will do.

 

[bicker]

Change your perspective. Rather than blaming the victims, you could say the following:

Some children today lack the ability to be kind. They take every opportunity to bully (for a variety of reasons) and they systematically target, harass and bully others (or maybe just one individual) to the point that the individual/s are left feeling beaten down, attacked, insecure and unsure.

The consequences of these feelings and bullying in general can never be explained away by saying, "Kids just need to let stuff roll off of their back". Every single instance of bullying needs to be and should be explained by resting blame solely on the shoulders of the bully. You cannot place blame on those being victimized.

Yes, very true. Other than degree, there is no operational difference between saying that children who are bullied should "let stuff roll off of their back" and saying that slaves on plantations in the 18th century should have "let stuff roll off of their back". They're both transgressions against humanity, one simply orders of magnitude worse than the other, but still both bad things.

As time has gone on, yes, we as a society have become increasingly more compassionate, and therefore deem acceptable only smaller and smaller transgressions of this sort. Many people hope for a future where love and compassion is not arbitrarily cut-off by a certain threshold.

 

[Uncle Remus]

If it ever got physical, then I don't see the problem. As for verbal sexual harassment, I was able to defuse that. You'd be surprised what a simple "knock it off" will do.

This isn't really aimed at you, but just to make the point.

You're fired.

 

[castleview]

I guess you haven't read any of my posts. I am a teacher - I live at school!

I don't agree with much of what you say, so we'll have to agree to disagree...You clearly don't have any understanding of just how serious bullying is these days...Telling kids to go and fight their own battles (pardon the pun) is not an acceptable answer when Sally is being called a ***** all day long at school, or Johnny is being pushed into the toilet.

Tiger

Okay if Johnny is being pushed into a toilet, that is assault and holding someone against their will. The school and the police will be notified and the Tiger Mom in me will make everyone miserable until that **** is tended to.

 

[bicker]

Bullying in schools is hardly new. This has been going on since the dawn of time.

We also used to beat each other over the heads with sticks and "steal each other's women". I'm not sure I understand this specific part of your message, specifically in the context of the message you were replying to.

 

[castleview]

This isn't really aimed at you, but just to make the point.

You're fired.

Ouch. I've been fired by the bully drill sergeant!

 

[Goofyluver]

Yes, very true. Other than degree, there is no operational difference between saying that children who are bullied should "let stuff roll off of their back" and saying that slaves on plantations in the 18th century should have "let stuff roll off of their back". They're both transgressions against humanity, one simply orders of magnitude worse than the other, but still both bad things.

As time has gone on, yes, we as a society have become increasingly more compassionate, and therefore deem acceptable only smaller and smaller transgressions of this sort. Many people hope for a future where love and compassion is not arbitrarily cut-off by a certain threshold.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

The kind of bullying that is going on now is a lot worse than ever before, cases in the uk have included
a child tied up and whipped with a skipping rope (the dinner lady who told the parents what had happened got the sack)
a boy hung by the neck
a girl stripped half naked and pictures taken, when the headmaster was informed it was ignored.
we are not talking mild name calling but "bullying" these kids are pushedto the point of killing themselves but you are blaming the victims. Viewing something else in the same way. Lets stop schools from keeping peanuts away from kids allergic if they can't cope with it in school how are they going to do it after they leave school and if a few die because of it then they should have been able to have been able to cope with it.

BUT blaming the victim is not the same as saying the victim has to be taught to be stronger, which is what many are saying. I'm not saying it is their fault these things are happening. All of the cases you mentioned above make me ask one thing, where are the adults?

And yes how are the peanut allergy kids going to survive!?!? I've been asking that from day one! They need to learn to survive, not make the world adapt to them.

 

[castleview]

The kind of bullying that is going on now is a lot worse than ever before, cases in the uk have included
a child tied up and whipped with a skipping rope (the dinner lady who told the parents what had happened got the sack)
a boy hung by the neck
a girl stripped half naked and pictures taken, when the headmaster was informed it was ignored.
we are not talking mild name calling but "bullying" these kids are pushedto the point of killing themselves but you are blaming the victims. Viewing something else in the same way. Lets stop schools from keeping peanuts away from kids allergic if they can't cope with it in school how are they going to do it after they leave school and if a few die because of it then they should have been able to have been able to cope with it.

That's not bullying; those are crimes. Writing them off as bullying minimizes it.

 

[Tiger926]

Okay if Johnny is being pushed into a toilet, that is assault and holding someone against their will. The school and the police will be notified and the Tiger Mom in me will make everyone miserable until that **** is tended to.

So you are saying that physical bullying is worse than emotional bullying? Please enlighten me, as perhaps I've misunderstood...?

I'm guessing that the word you used is about Sallys bedroom activity or does it rhyme with witch?

Should this occur no but at the same time is Sally a **** ? is she conducting herself in a fashion that will make her gain that title OR is it that she is very pretty and girls are jealous. If its the first one then Sally needs to learn to either not conduct herself in that fashion OR be who she is and not apologize for it. If it's the later then she is going to have to learn to deal with the fact that she is beautiful and girls and women will always have something to say and to ignore them because they just wish they were her.

It was a word in reference to sexual behaviour.

Yes, very true. Other than degree, there is no operational difference between saying that children who are bullied should "let stuff roll off of their back" and saying that slaves on plantations in the 18th century should have "let stuff roll off of their back". They're both transgressions against humanity, one simply orders of magnitude worse than the other, but still both bad things.

As time has gone on, yes, we as a society have become increasingly more compassionate, and therefore deem acceptable only smaller and smaller transgressions of this sort. Many people hope for a future where love and compassion is not arbitrarily cut-off by a certain threshold.

Tiger

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

Yes, very true. Other than degree, there is no operational difference between saying that children who are bullied should "let stuff roll off of their back" and saying that slaves on plantations in the 18th century should have "let stuff roll off of their back". They're both transgressions against humanity, one simply orders of magnitude worse than the other, but still both bad things.

As time has gone on, yes, we as a society have become increasingly more compassionate, and therefore deem acceptable only smaller and smaller transgressions of this sort. Many people hope for a future where love and compassion is not arbitrarily cut-off by a certain threshold.

Yes, but that will never happen because human nature isn't like that.

As for comparing bullying to slavery Two VERY different extremes.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

Tiger, I honestly get where you are coming from all I'm saying is that you can either spend time trying to change the unchangeable or you can spend time empowering those who will benefit from it the most. I would rather help they bullied vs waste ANY energy on the bully. Eventually when they see their actions aren't impressing anyoneelses they will then have to deal with the insecurity that is causing them to be jerks. Or just be jerks for the rest of their lives. Lonely jerks, but jerks nonetheless.