Taking the whole family!!

[Shooby doo]

Thought I would throw this one out there & see if anyone had a similar or better experience!? Dw,Ds & I are going back to WDW this year,which is totally out of Sync with our normally every other year policy!The reason?Last time we went as a whole family group & it was that stressful we come back feeling worse than when we left! Even a simple thing like deciding where to have Breakfast was a major debate!I was the only driver so I know that had we had another car we could alleviate some of the problems.Now we all normally get along fine but for some reason in a holiday atmosphere it all changed!In fact that badly that we are keeping our next trip a secret just in case they find out & want to come!!
Will wait to hear if anyone else ended up in a similar situation
SD

 

[JimmyMartin]

we have traveled with married children families. One person does need to make a draft schedule. Then let everyone elase see it. Allow time for each group to have time alone or doing what they want. With WDW transportation you can arrive at one park and then meet make at the end of the day where you want. Maybe you should stay at house or condo with kitchen. we did so we bought one last year. It helps for breakfast especially.

 

[kiddisney]

hi - we had the same problem - we had gone every other year & then one year the whole family came - and it was so stressful - the older kids wanted the fast rides - my younger kids wanted the slower rides & shows - some of the family had never been there before & didn't know how to enjoy - they only thought of it as an amusement park and went for the rides - and the grandparents were cranky because they wanted everyone together at all times - to make one big happy family - which we weren't -

so we ended up going just the four of us the next year - using our anniversary as an excuse to go by ourselves and we enjoyed it immensenly -

so six years later the whole family decided to go again - but this time i up front said that everyone can do what they want to - we brought walkie talkied & cell phones - and if something came up we had agreed beforehand that we would separate - we only had two fights over the 7 day trip - which was way better than the last time - one example was that my brother and his new wife wanted to go to a character breakfast as an anniversary meal - & i had to take a midterm & my husband had to do some work - so they went to the breakfast & my mother took the grandchildren later & then I met them around noon - and it worked out ok - though grandma had trouble working the phones - the kids did all the work -

so to make a long story short - you are not alone - and the next tiime make the decision up front that everyone can do the things they want to & that the group can meet up later -

 

[bobbiwoz]

It happened to us, and not with a very large group. About 5 years ago, mom and sister joined us for our anniversary weekend, but we were at the CBR and they were at BWI. The weather was soo hot, it wasn't easy getting together, we really didn't like CBR, it was too spread out for us. It was a vacation that didn't leave us relaxed or with any good feelings.

So, we got a postcard with a wonderful code. We threw the post card away because after all, we had already been once that year, but retrieved the card, and mailed the deposit out on the very last day. We sent it special delivery. That was the year that Disney closed for the hurricane, and we arrived the next day and had the most wonderful time at the wonderful WL.

Bobbi

 

[PrincessDana]

I've often wondered if I would feel that way.

The last two times I've come back from WDW, I feel a desperate need to bring my parents, my sister and BIL and her three boys, along with my other sister and BIL and maybe even one sister's in-laws on our next trip.

I really talk up our trips and beg them to consider coming with us.

But then I think.....DD and I have such a great time alone. We are on our own schedule. We like to get up early and get to the parks when they open, we eat when we're hungry and will just up and decide to go over to EPCOT for a snack. That kind of vacation is just wonderful for the two of us.

I can see me not having as good of a time with all my family there...one sister would adamantly refuse to conform to EST and would insist on doing everything by CST. Another sister would sleep late. One of the kids would need naps...plus extra bathroom breaks....plus coping with everyone's appetite.

I think I would just rather take my parents with us the first time, either that or resign myself to spending a lot of money and not having as much fun.

 

[uktigger]

hi,
we are going again(2nd trip)and my family are coming with us so there will be 3 families with 5 kids between us (this will be the others first time)but we have all come to an agreement that we will be going our seperate way's during the day and meeting up in the evening, hopefully this will work out

eve

 

[donac]

If you go there should always be some sort of agreement before you go.This past AUg was the first time in 18 years that we went alone as a family. We have always gone with other people and we sometimes went places together and sometimes did things apart. It was nice to go alone and yet I know that my son did miss his cousin.

Dona

 

[Chim Chiminy]

We do the big extended family trips every time. Last trip, we (my immediate family-DH,DS,DD, myself) decided to arrive four days earlier so we could enjoy a few days at our own pace. It worked out well, except that one of my brothers unexpectedly had to arrive one day early due to his work.
But anyway, I always type up an excel file detailing each day of the trip. I start it out with where we are staying---all the resort info. Then for every day I fill in what we are having to eat i.e. Breakfast--in room, Lunch--counter service $25, Dinner--PS at Boma $30.
I try and have at least one sit down meal, usually lunch or dinner, where we all meet up together. The rest of the day you can do what you want.
I will fill in if we are having a swim day or if we are taking a break in the room midday. I email them to all family members to look over, then I print out copies for all the rooms.
We take walkie talkies and they work out pretty good.
I still get a bit stressed out when things don't go smoothly. I have one brother who sleeps late, then takes forever getting ready in the mornings.
My mantra for the next family trip in June/July will be "Let it go...."

 

[Montana Minnies]

Thanks for the topic Shooby doo
My sister and I are planning a family get together in Aug.04,(staying at a 2bdrm at OKW). So far out of 8 only 3 of us seem excited over the coming event. We have 1 maybe, and 4 who I guess are waiting until the last minute to let us know what they want to do and when.
I only hope the actual reunion goes more smoothly than the planning, we have got off to a turbulant start.
The suggestions so far have been helpful and getting together as a group for dinner or lunch should help relieve some of the "family"stress. I'll just keep reading the boards and hope/pray for the best outcome possible.

 

[bobbiwoz]

Good luck, Montana Minnies, we went with our adult family of 7 and 3 friends in '01, and it was great. We really only were all together for a dinner at Narcoosees, for the rest we mostly broke up into smaller groups. Although we did meet by chance at the FWF, around Illuminations, imagine that! It was a great trip. DSister arranged for a Disney photographer to take our family group pictures, they are a great souvenir of a wonderful vacation. DSister let us all pick our favorite pictures of the group and we all picked different ones!

It really was too hard when we tried to keep together, that happened the very first day, not all of us had the same opinion of different rides and shows. We threw "togetherness" out the window and winged it and it was great.

Bobbi

PS Our next family and friend get-together will be this December, there could be 15 of us, ages 1 year to 85, it's a celebration of Mom's 85th! Once I can make the reservations, 11 months out for DVC, then I'm going to look into what's what as far as Magical Gatherings. We'd love to get a fireworks show viewing arranged, a birthday dinner and a picture again, other than that, I think we'll wing it again.

 

[djm99]

You know, I really enjoy traveling with other families. Last year we traveled with 3 other families. I was considered the Disney "expert" (thanks to this board). I sent all the families my itinerary, along with great tips on things to bring to Florida, the parks, etc. I even purchased brochures for each of the families (Disney, universal, sea world, etc.) This gave them the opportunity to read about the attractions, and we came up with a consensus of where we would all go. Everyone decided to stick together for the most part, except one day one family went to sea world, one to Clearwater Beach, and 2 others returned to Disney world. It worked out fine, except one family wasn't as financially prepared for the trip and it was a downer.

This summer (Aug 2004) I am planning a new vacation. This time we all renting from various owners in Windsor Palms Resorts (some houses, townhouses, and condos). Some are driving, and some are flying. Some are staying 8 days and others will fly up during that weekend. As of yet, no one is staying on site, but that may change. People paired up with those they wanted to stay with and made their own arrangements. I did recommend many different websites. I personally put together a great packet with tips on savings, the vouchers, AAA discounts, I sent sample budgets for families of 3 4, and 5 people, and I personally went online and sent the WDW Vacation Planning DVD to their homes. I will also send out my personal agenda/itinerary my personal budget (for realistic financial planning) with the rides and shows I must go see. Since we now have some 45 friends and family, we'll have to plan something together. If it is only a PS Dinner/Lunch somewhere.

Example: Since its so many we might plan on Monday to go to MGM, Tuesday Animal Kingdom, Wednesday Universal, and so on. But to think it would be a good idea to hang with one another all day is a nightmare waiting to happen.

You know every time I go to Disney I think of someone who I wish could be here to see what I'm seeing and feel what I am feeling. It's a fantasy and everyone should experience it!!!

Its like all those Disney commercials say, Disney is Magnificent all by itself, but its Magical when you share it with those you love!!!!

Have a wonderful Disney Day!!!!

 

[BambiTamby]

originally posted by Shooby Doo....

In fact that badly that we are keeping our next trip a secret just in case they find out & want to come!!

DH said you couldn've have said it better!

Now, mind you, we go to WDW quite a bit, and I LOVE to spread the magic......
but two trips ago, we took two other families, (in-laws) and we left WDW feeling we needed another vacation!!!

Also, I have a SIL that's always telling my niece's that "if they're not good, Aunt Tamby won't take them to WDW !"



Enough said, they won't know where there in March
UNTIL WE GET BACK!!!!

"Oh, didn't I tell you that we were going for spring break?
Must've slipped my mind."


Or you could just do we've always done in the past.....

 

[sk!mom]

What a great thread! My family of four has NEVER taken more than week-end trips with other families. Trips with others are fun, but always have a measure of stress. While vacations with just the four of us are always terrific. Our vacation philosophy does not really jive to well with most of the people that we know. We will save all year for a vacation, but once we are there we refuse to skimp on the fun because of cost.

My sister just asked if she and my nephew could go with us to WDW this June. I didn't feel that I could refuse, but I am worried. I am doing what others have sugested and just telling her where we are staying and what we are planning- she can plan to go with us or make her own plan. There will be NO discussions about "should we do this or that?" I hope that it will be fun to have newbies along.

 

[ncbyrne]

DH and I have a wonderful time on every WDW trip when it's just the two of us. We are both Disney nuts and enjoy the planning as much as our commando style vacation. My b-i-l and his wife own a timeshare and traded a week in Destin,FL for a 2 br in Wyndham Palms. We talked about the trip ad naseum for months! We made sure that they were prepared for the expense, and told them over and over that we would each go our separate ways and meet up for dinner. Well, when we got there, they didn't have a plan, and wanted to tag along. That didn't even work for a single day! I won't belabor the details, I'll just say NEVER AGAIN!

 

[neverlandclub]

DH and I did the whole family thing for nearly 11 years. Only went on our honeymoon alone. I made every ressie, planned every day and activity. I even printed out itineraries. Then I would spend the entire trip babysitting everyone because NOBODY was either capable of or, wanted to make a simple decision. But boy, they let you know if they didn't like the choice. People would sleep late, not want to go to a ressie at the last minute, wanted to meet up with you later (causing you to constantly have to stop your day to meet someone and unable to change parks until you did, regardless of how crowded it got! UGH!)It got worse and worse until DH said, "Enough!". Took our first trip alone 2 years ago. Made the mistake of telling them it would be just us and........we are still hearing about it. Now we don't tell a soul. Strictly on a need to know basis. I work too hard to spend my vacation as a concierge/tour guide. Now I come home relaxed.

 

[BambiTamby]

Now we don't tell a soul. Strictly on a need to know basis. I work too hard to spend my vacation as a concierge/tour guide. Now I come home relaxed.

All's been said in a nut shell. THE END!

 

[IvyandLace]

Wow! It's so nice to be able to find people who empathize with you! Since my DH and I have traveled to WDW in 2000 and 2002 with MY family (and had a BLAST), he thought that we should share our favorite place with HIS.... So we took my inlaws, BIL and his girlfriend this past October for seven days. Never mind the fact that I sent complete and detailed weekly emails telling all about the parks, hotel, and WDW in general. Never mind that we purchased a user-friendly WDW guide book for my MIL to read (which she never opened.) Never mind that I made up daily itineraries-laminated-with maps from my Passporter with all the daily schedule info as well as meal times and locations. *sigh* We were still reduced to that "concierge/tour guide" role with very stubborn people who were more excited to find a bench in airconditioning (my FIL) than watch any firework show. We took a bathroom break every hour (literally) for my BIL and my MIL decided to throw a fit when my BIL and his girlfriend didn't show up for Spectromagic...so she thought leaving in a huff and missing our very special IllumiNations cruise would get her point across. (The next day she said, "Why don't we do that cruise tonight instead?")

Never again. Never again. Never again...and, yes, my DH and I are going to WDW this week for a long weekend (ALONE!) to "cleanse our palettes" and rediscover the magic. Wish us luck!

IVY

 

[bobbiwoz]

IvyandLace, have a great time!

 

[crisi]

We took my mother in law and her sister in October. We normally go every other year as well, but this was our first DVC trip, the kids are the perfect age for the magic, and my husband's mother isn't getting any younger. Anyway, I was so stressed that she was going to ruin the trip that I booked a cruise for Feburary (there were some other reasons as well). That way, I could say to myself as things weren't going MY way "well, I'll get to cruise in Feburary."

The whole thing went surprisingly well. We ran them ragged for two days, then split up...they toured Epcot - poking in ever shop, enjoyed the Hall of Presidents and the Riverboat ride, while we rode Barnstormer and Dumbo and Peter Pan, did Epcot at record pace, sent the kids on a Pirate Cruise, and went to a water park. Every evening we'd meet for dinner.

So the question is "how'd I'd manage it" Well, my mother in law likes to sleep in, so I gave her the opportunity to do that....telling her "we'll run you around for a few days, then you can sleep in." And we did take her sister, so they could enjoy time together. She realized she was "slowing us down" as much as we realized we were "running them ragged" and keeping them from so much they would enjoy - but the kids wouldn't. So we appealed to both her getting what she wanted (sleeping in, a chance to spend time in World Showcase at her own pace) and her letting our kids get what they wanted (a day at the waterpark, another ride on Dumbo - which while magical with your grandkids, is not something you need to do over and over again).

Originally, they were talking about not going with us to our PSs - and we did change one on the fly. But I booked them all for all of us and they made them all...I think they discovered the whole thing to be a little overwhelming and were happy to have a place to just show up to. I also tried very hard to keep them in mind when choosing restaurants.

 

[Dznypal]

every other year my parents take our whole family (there is now 20 0f us!!!!)

On a family reunion trip. we have been to hawaii, grand cayman.
bahamas and st thomas)

this year is hawaii (maui) so not only is it a family reuinuin trip my DS is getting married while we're there

I think the sucess to our trips is by just not rying to plan too much together even though the idea of these trips is to spend time as a family we usually meet up for breakfast and go over what everyone is planning and then who ever wants to go with whoever is going they go.

and then we meet up again for dinner as a group.

it works out great for our group and no one feels felt out or like they have to do something. everyone gets to do what they want!!
so no feelings get hurt.

Just 46 days till I have a wonderful DIL