Sympathy Card - is it too late?

[mtomlin66]

Hello,

A friend of ours lost his father last Wednesday. ...The funeral was two days ago - on Monday.

Is it too late to send a sympathy card? If I mailed it today, they'd likely receive it on Friday. ...I would really like to send them a hand-written note, but would it be inappropriate to send one five days after the funeral?

I guess - I'm just thinking - if someone is trying to "heal," would it do more harm than good to remind them, again?

Thanks in advance...
~ Beth

Beth
I just lost my dad January 8 and I can tell you that we have appreciated every single call, flower, visit, plant, and card. Knowing that the other person took the time to make the gesture has meant so much. The love and support of so many wonderful friends is really helping my family through this difficult time. So, please, send the card with a note and if you remember to follow up with another card or a phone call a few weeks later.

 

[pixiewings71]

I just found out today that my BILs Father passes away this week, his memorial is on Saturday. I will be sending a card to them from us as soon as I can get to the store. Probably this weekend.

 

[RUDisney]

I found out at a class reunion that an exBF's grandmother had died quite a while before the reunion. Because he and I dated for 4 years through HS and into college, I knew his family very well. I sent a card then because I didn't know until then.

I only see this guy every 5 years at our reunions. At the next one, he told me how much his mother appreciated that I'd sent a card.

I even sent a card to a stranger once. Another adoptive parent had lost a child in a pool accident. I had heard about her from common friends, but I've never met her. They adopted their children at the same time we adopted ours.

I just felt compelled to tell her how sorry I was. I know the excitement of anticipating the notice from Russia that you've got a court date. I know the excitement of bringing your new children home and all of the hopes and dreams you have for them. For those dreams to be dashed so soon was heartbreaking. I just wanted her to know that I, a stranger to her, cared about her loss.

Three years after my BFF's father passed away, a man came to the front door of her parents' house because her father was a dentist who practiced in his home. When her Mom explained that he had passed away, the man sat on the bench on her front porch, put his head in his hands and started to cry. My friend's mother had to comfort him. He had no idea that the dr had passed. It made my friend's mother feel good to know that he'd affected this man's life so greatly.

It's never too late to express sympathy for a loss.

 

[Imzadi]

Now is the time when the bereaved actually have time to read the condolence cards.

It is never too late to send a card. She lost her dad. She will be grieving for months to years. It's not like something she will forget, so you don't have to worry about reminding her. In fact, even if you had just found out 2 years from now, getting a card saying such and sending sympathy would still touch the person very much.

 

[dislaney]

Send the card. It is definitely not too late.

 

[Cindy B]

Well, to put it into perspective-- I had an old college boyfriend that I knew. In 2003 saw in the local paper his mother had died, but I had no way to contact him. He had just got married and moved away--I didn't have a new current address.

Flash forward to this summer. I saw him on Facebook and before I even friend requested him I sent him a message-- something like I saw this back then, couldn't get in touch with you, sorry to hear about it. He was very happy that I remembered and wasn't upset that I brought it up.

We are still Facebook friends.

 

[WINTER]

it is perfectly OK. I lost my mother right before Christmas. A friend from church just sent me one and it was so appreciated.